


I Still Love You (Till Forever)

by mizunohikaru



Series: Mizuno Hikaru's P101 oneshots collections [16]
Category: NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Amnesia, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, It's more NielOng actually, M/M, Niel's cat need their own tags, OngNiel is science, OngNiel is together, Ongniel, Slow Burn, Smut, Temporary Amnesia, and by slow burn I really meant it, prepare for feels, unbetaed, yes i made each cats got their own tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2019-06-07 14:14:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 44
Words: 137,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15220943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mizunohikaru/pseuds/mizunohikaru
Summary: Forever is a long time but I keep my words that I save to youTogether we can go far as long as you are with meCause I will fall for you no matter what they say, I still love youI Still Love You — The Overtunes--"Who are you? Do I know you?"Kang Daniel hit his head due props's malfunction and suffered retrograde amnesia as the result. He woke up in the hospital and lost his memories for the last three years. He was soon attracted to one particular handsome Hyung with pretty moles that formed a summer triangle constellation on his cheek.[edit] I rated up the series coz *cough*smut*cough*





	1. I Like You, Somehow

**Author's Note:**

> The title was taken from The Overtunes's "I Still Love You"  
> I have this prompt idea since 4th of October 2017, but yeah it's June 2018 and I finally, FINALLY (!!!) wrote it down.  
> If you wanna know why I knew the exact date, well... I posted the plotbunny on my facebook's post before. But it wasn't in English and hell yeah it contained super duper major spoilers for the ending, so I won't link the post here LOLZ
> 
> I'll (try my best to) post an update every Monday.  
> Coz Monday sucks (sorry Monday!) and we all need some fun in the beginning of the week :))
> 
> P.S. Yeah it's unbetaed as usual please bear with my grammar and possible typos XDXD

* * *

If one day you don't recognized my voice  
If one day seems so hard to breath  
I promise you to give my all  
Like you do from the day I start to see

Forever is a long time but I keep my words that I save to you  
Together we can go far as long as you are with me  
Cause I will fall for you no matter what they say, I still love you, I still love you  
You'll never be alone look me in the eyes, I still love you I still love you, Till forever

**I Still Love You — The Overtunes**

 

* * *

 

**[News] [Exclusive]** Former WANNA ONE’s center, Kang Daniel was rushed to the hospital this afternoon. He was participating in the upcoming game show, _DASH!Idol_ ☆ when one of the slide malfunctioned. According to another cast member, apparently Kang Daniel was hit on the head and went unconscious. The paramedics immediately took him with a stretcher and a neck braces and rushed to hospital using the ambulance. His fellow MMO member, Yoon Jisung was spotted on the hospital’s lobby an hour after the incident.

**Source:** Dispatch

 

[+1,283, -32] OMG I hope that he’ll be alright! I was shocked when I hear about the news from my friend  ㅠㅠ It’s a shame that the game crew didn’t re-check about the safety of the props used on the set and ended in a terrifying malfunctioned. Let’s pray for Kang Daniel’s safety, guys!

[+304, -2] I’m not a fan, but I do acknowledged that Kang Daniel is a talented artist. Let’s hope for the best and pray that he will be conscious soon.

[+429, -14] Oh nooooooo ㅠㅠ Oppa ㅠㅠ ㅠㅠ I hate the show’s staffs! I heard that they didn’t check about the slides and the other props used on the game before. How careless!! ㅠㅠ

[+69, -2] The PD had apologized publicly and admitted fault. Apparently the slide’s preparation was rushed and several of the bolts wasn’t put properly in place. (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ ┻━┻

[+635, -6] Just after I felt happy that Kang Daniel finally appeared on another show, this happened  ㅠㅠ My heart cannot take this. I hope that he will be okay.

[+108, -11] His head got hit and he was knocked unconscious  ㅠㅠ OMG My NielMoyed, please be strong, Noona will pray for you! Please be alright and healed soon  ㅠㅠ

[+357, -4] Latest update: Fellow MMO Yoon Jisung accompanied Kang Daniel on the hospital. They had done the MRI and X-Scan etc. According to the staff who work on the lab, the results are stable and he didn’t get any external injuries expect from a couple light bruises and scrapes. Let’s pray that Kang Daniel will be conscious soon!! 

 

* * *

 

The room smelled like medicine and disinfectant. 

There were white and blue stripes wallpaper all around, the big wall mounted TV was placed in front of the bed. There was a rather huge bedside table next to him, a humidifier emitted endless thin white mist that smelled like flower and citrus was placed atop of it along with a vase filled with fresh flowers. The room was rather well-lit eventhough the wide panelled windows on the side wall was covered by thick beige curtain. On the second glance, there was also a canopy-like device attached to his bed, a white patterned long curtain was pulled twenty or thirty centimetres wide to cover his bed from the view of strangers, just in case someone decide to peek inside using the small rectangle window on the top side of the panelled door.

 

His whole body felt sore, like he was hit by a truck or something impactful like that. There was an IV drip attached on his left arm, a pulse oximeter was clipped on his right index finger; measuring his heart rate and the oxygen saturation of his blood, some numbers displayed on the screen—the graph was steady with constant ups and downs. There’s a ventilator hooked into his nose, pumped oxygen directly into his lungs.

 

Daniel’s first thought was _What happened?_ After all, he recognized that he was placed on a hospital room, a VIP one from all the luxury decors and facilities. There were all sorts of cables attached on him, connected him with the foreign machines. _Do I have an accident…?_ He tried to move his fingers, his limbs, then shifted his body. It felt sore and his head hurts like hell, but he still got control over his body well. _Well, at least I’m no paralysed or something like that—_

 

“Niel?”

There’s a familiar voice called his name, and the curtain attached on his bed was tucked away. He had muttered some soft groans, and this person seemed to noticed it. There was a living-room-like area located in between his bed and the door, spacious enough to fit a big comfy sofa and a coffee table. There were even a small rack filled with magazines and newspaper on the side.

 

The stranger’s face was filled with relief, though there was some traces of worry there. The brunette touched his cheeks briefly, “You finally regain your consciousness, Niel-ah…” Daniel didn’t reply as he furrowed his brows. The stranger looked awfully familiar; and on the closer look he finally recognized his Hyung, “Jisung-Hyung…?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You looked… way older than usual.”

 

There’s a disbelief expression flashed on Jisung’s face, followed with an annoyed face. “Aish this kid…! This is the first thing you say to me right after you opened your eyes? You brat…!” He slapped Daniel’s arm lightly, but Daniel still winced from the impact, “But… you indeed looked different…!” Daniel tried to justify himself, and Jisung rolled his eyes, “What do you mean?”

 

“You looked older, I’m serious…!” Daniel defended himself, raised both of his arms and gestured Jisung to listen to him, “Your hair colour was somewhat lighter… your outfit was way fancy than your usual T-shirt and shorts… Your skin also seemed smoother—wait Hyung, since when you applied make up on daily basis?”

Now it was Jisung whom furrowed his brows. “Da…niel…?” He called, those worried expression came back to his face. Daniel gave him his confused puppy look and tilted his head, “Yeah… Hyung…?”

 

“Wait, this is weird,” Jisung pinched the bridge of his eyes, “Seriously, you sounded like—“

 

There was a loud dashing sound from the hallway, and someone opened the door in a hurry. A handsome man with sharp features stepped in, his breath ragged. He was wearing a black hoodie, a black ripped pants and matching sneakers. His skin glistened, there were beads of perspiration on the temple of his head, slowly rolled down to his jaw; and Daniel noticed that this handsome hyung got three moles on one side of his cheeks—those three dots formed a triangle, looked like a summer constellation of Altair, Vega and Deneb from the famous 7th of July’s myth.

 

“I came as soon as I could—“ He said, still wheezing. Then he realized that Daniel and Jisung both stared at him, “Oh, he’s awake? Thanks God…! Wait…. is anything wrong?” The black hoodied stranger approached closer, held Daniel’s wrist intimately, “…did I miss something?”

 

There’s a confused expression on Jisung’s face and just as he opened his mouth to call Seongwoo’s name, Daniel opened his and asked the unfamiliar hyung, “Ehmm… sorry Hyung, but who are you? Do I know you…?” 

 

A deafening silence filled the room as Seongwoo’s eyes widened. His face turned pale as those fingers wrapped Daniel’s wrist trembled—the fingertips felt cold and Daniel felt a sting on his heart when the older male let those fingers away from his skin. “Niel…ah?” Seongwoo awkwardly tried to laugh, “This isn’t funny—“

 

But Daniel’s expression was clear as day and Jisung gasped. “Ah,” He tried to solve the chaos, “Wait here, Seongwoo—“ He tapped the handsome hyung’s shoulder and went to the door, forgetting the call button near Daniel’s bed in panic, “I’ll call the doctor.”

 

Seongwoo stared on the door for a couple of seconds before he turned his gaze back to Daniel. Daniel stared at him intensely, and Seongwoo didn’t know what to do. For a moment he hesitated, wondered if he need to follow Jisung, but Daniel grabbed his wrist when he tried to step away. “No, stay here with me please,” The younger male pleaded. He quickly added, “My head… hurts…”

 

There was an overwhelming worry filled Seongwoo’s face after he heard Daniel’s sentence. He rushed back to the latter’s side, “Which side hurts? Please tell me—“ Those fingers lightly kneaded the side of Daniel’s head, and Daniel enjoyed the touch. Those fingers felt familiar, nice; and there was a whiff of Seongwoo’s cologne that knocked his senses with a nostalgic feeling. He knew the scent, and somewhat this stranger felt awfully familiar: he felt like he knew the latter for a long time but couldn’t remember his name or when they had met before.

 

“What’s your name, Hyung…?” He asked, and for a split second there were pain and sadness on Seongwoo’s dark orbs. He forced his lips curved into a smile before he replied, “My name is Ong Seongwoo, Niel-ah.”

 

“Ong—?”

 

“Yeah,” The raven haired smiled, “Ong Seongwoo. Not Hong Seongwoo, Ong Seongwoo. Not Eun Seongwoo, Ong Seongwoo. Not Ong Seongwoon, Ong Seongwoo.”

 

In response, Daniel immediately laughed: his eyes disappeared into two crescent lines. His hearty laughed filled the room, and somehow Seongwoo felt that Daniel’s grip on his wrist tightened. “You are really amusing, Seongwoo Hyung.”

 

He didn’t realize the pained expression on Seongwoo’s eyes. _You are really amusing, Seongwoo Hyung._ That was the same thing Daniel said to him on that half-dark practice room, the air felt hot as the two of them sprawled on the floor, drenched in sweats, shirt sticked on their bodies, _Sorry Sorry_ still played from the small tape’s speaker. _I really, really like you._

 

“I like you, somehow,” The present time Daniel said, and there was another pang on Seongwoo’s heart. He wanted to give the latter a reply, but Jisung went back and he brought a team of doctors along with him.

 

“Please step aside for a moment,” One of them said, and Seongwoo followed. Daniel was overwhelmed by the sudden crowd, but behaved well as he let the doctor examined him. They checked the machine, examined him using the flashlight and the stethoscope, before finally asked him series of questions and he answered them back as quick as he could—his eyes wondered away, looking for Seongwoo’s figure behind the doctors and the nurses. Jisung stood there beside this Seongwoo Hyung, seemed close to each other—and there’s a tight, uneasy feeling swelled inside his chest when he saw the two of them whispering something in secrets.

 

“Daniel-ssi?” The main doctor called his name, and Daniel shifted his focus back to the grey haired ahjussi in metal-rimmed glasses, “How old are you…?”

 

_It’s a funny question,_ he thought. But he still answered the question right away, “I’m 21.”

 

Jisung let a rather loud gasp out, and Daniel noticed the strange expressions of the people surrounded him. Seongwoo’s expression was rather unreadable, but Daniel could see an uneasiness there. It wasn’t difficult to conclude that there was something wrong in his answers, and it was as easy as one plus one—so after a few seconds he awkwardly asked, “My age… isn’t 21, is it?”

 

 


	2. So Baby, Pull Me Closer in the Backseat of Your Rover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seongwoo took him to the hallway, his face solemn as he slowly whispered. “Jisung…?”
> 
> “Yeah?”
> 
> “I need you to keep my relationship with Daniel a secret from him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya lovelies~!!!  
> The 2nd chapter is coming earlier than the supposed schedule, so here it is~
> 
> Yeah, I do state that I'll post a chapter every Monday morning, but I'll attend WANNA ONE's concert on 15th of July and won't be able to post anything until late Monday coz I won't bring my laptop with me to the hotel. I don't want to post the chapter late, coz some of you guys were asking about the next chapter already, so I posted this chapter today instead of Monday ^^ Enjoy~!!
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. DID YOU GUYS WATCH DANIEL'S VLIVE ON THURSDAY OMG I LEGIT SWOONING--ESPECIALLY WHEN HE PLAYED CLOSERS (anyone know which remix version it is?) AND I SCREAMED COZ I DO INSERT THE SONG TO THIS CHAPTER THATS WHY I RLLY NEED TO MAKE IT AS THIS CHAPTER'S TITLE~~!!! *pardon the all capslock I'm too excited*

 

* * *

 

Apparently he was right: he wasn’t 21 this year.

 

His name is Kang Daniel. He was born in Busan on the 10th of December 1996. He used to live with his single mother and two pet cats, Rooney and Peter. Despite the male name, both of his cats are female. He loves to dance, but he dropped out from the academy due finance problem; his family couldn’t afford the expensive tuition. He did some modern contemporary dance on stages, but he preferred b-boying better. He joined B2M Entertainment and met Yoon Jisung there—the older male often acted like his second mother. He was the maknae, the youngest of the bunch, and he aimed to be a rapper.

 

Daniel listed those facts, and those memories of him were true. But when he stated that he was a trainee for a year and several months, Jisung shook his head immediately. The older male gave him a handheld mirror—Daniel almost couldn’t recognized himself on the reflection. He looked… different. He was more mature, a bit leaner, though his overall face hadn’t changed much. His current hair is a mixture of platinum blonde and light brunette. His body was bulkier, and there were some definite muscles on his arms and stomach.

 

“What year is it now…?” He asked, curious. It felt bizzare, like a science fiction scene. Or something from the daytime romance drama. The male protagonist got amnesia, and his lover need to help him regain his memories. Did he have one—a lover?

 

“It’s 2019, Niel-ah,” Jisung answered, “We are on the mid of July.”

 

2019\. Wow. His last memories was from 2016, so there was three years gap in his memories. The doctors asked him to do another series of tests, but the current diagnose was retrograde amnesia. It was unknown if he will regain his memories back soon, or he need more times. Apparently he lost his memories because he hit his head on an accident when he participated on a game show. He was appearing on the show as a guest, through there were rumours about him to be included as permanent cast member. 

 

Jisung said that the agency had released the news about he regained consciousness, but wanted to keep his amnesia state a secret for a while. At the moment, they had cancelled most of his schedule for several full days so he could recuperate his health at ease. After all Daniel also need to stomach the three years gap; the whole concept of schedule and work and shows were bizarre for him: it felt like a wishful dream. The 2019 Kang Daniel was apparently one of the hottest idol, mentioned at least once every day by the media, modelled for so many brands, and got his face plastered on many famous magazines’s cover.

 

During the whole time, it was Jisung who spoke to him, explained the gist of the situation. Seongwoo on the other hand, stood there by the window, half leaning on it—seemed to be drowned in his own thoughts. He looked devilishly handsome with his dark themed outfits, with his sharp features that seemed like a bust statue carved by a master sculptor. His current comma hair showed a bit of his forehead, and Daniel wanted to touch the crease folds between those perfectly arched eyebrows—so the latter could stop frowning.

 

“Seongwoo Hyung….?” Daniel called. Both of him and Jisung stared at the latter, and Seongwoo was startled like a deer caught in the headlights. “Ah,” He stuttered, “Well, I just thought…” There were silence followed, and Jisung gestured Seongwoo to continue. 

 

“Should we call Eo—“ Seongwoo hesitated for a bit, “…your mother? Aunty must be worried. I mean, yeah I’ve called her earlier to give her the updates… but I haven’t tell her about Daniel’s amnesia. Should we tell her? And I do believe she will be happy to hear Niel’s voice. What do you think?”

 

“It’s a nice idea, actually,” Jisung nodded, “Aunty must be worried sick. But yeah, should we tell her about your amnesia, Niel? Personally I think that she deserve to know, though.”

 

“Let’s tell her,” Daniel decided, “It’s better that I was the one who give her the news, rather than she found out later via the news or whatever, right? I’ll ask her to keep it a secret for now.” 

 

Daniel was unfamiliar with his newest iphone’s configuration—the pristine, expensive model was different OS from his previous android. Seongwoo explained the steps he need to operate the phone, and after a while Daniel had familiarized himself with the device. He called her mother, labelled as the simple ‘Mom’ on his contact list. It only took a few rings to get connected; his mother picked up right away. _“Niel?”_ The digitalized voice was a little bit static and distorted, but it was his mother’s voice alright. “Eomma,” He called, “Yeah, it’s me. I’m fine. Yeah, I’m still on the hospital though…”

 

Seongwoo nudged Jisung and gestured to follow him outside. Thinking that they should give Daniel a private moment with his mother, Jisung obliged. Seongwoo took him to the hallway, his face solemn as he slowly whispered. “Jisung…?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I need you to keep my relationship with Daniel a secret from him.” Seongwoo’s request was rather odd, and Jisung opened his mouth to protest—but there was something on Seongwoo’s eyes as he was pleading earnestly. “Please,” He asked again, “I have my reasons. I won’t avoided him or anything. But please, don’t tell him that we are lovers.”

 

“He will still find out later, Seongwoo-ya,” Jisung tried to reason with his younger fellow, “He only need to google his own name to find your name on the related search. Your photos and videos with him are everywhere. OngNiel is still famous as ever, even after WANNA ONE ended last 2018. And he—“

 

Jisung wanted to say that _And he still got that adoring, loving eyes whenever he looks at you_ , but Seongwoo shook his head and lowered his gaze to the patterned carpet—It was an art deco style with brown and black pattern. “Jisung, please.” Seongwoo’s voice was filled with determination, “I just—we—I need to do this. I know that I’m being selfish, but…”

 

“But you have your own reason?” Jisung asked, and Seongwoo nodded. The older male sighed, “You guys gave me headache, seriously.” Jisung pinched the bridge of his eyes, a gesture he did thousands of time since he started taking care these naughty _dongsaengs_ of him. “Well, I knew that it wasn’t always smooth sailing for the two of you and yes, I have witnessed a couple of your biggest fights before. I know clearly that Daniel was sometimes acted like a brat with big ego, often be really insensitive as well… but Seongwoo,” Jisung patted Seongwoo’s shoulder, “Both of us know that he loves you. He’s really, really loves you. So don’t break his heart, okay? I’ll give up to your whim this time, but don’t take advantage of the fact he lost his memories and forgot about you.”

 

“I won’t,” Seongwoo assured him, “I… just want to see how things going.”

 

There were a few minutes of silence between the two of them before Daniel ended his phone call and approached the door. Both of Jisung and Seongwoo could hear the younger’s steps, so Jisung asked him right away. “So, how is it?”

 

“Well,” Daniel locked his phone, “She took the news rather well. I explained that I forgot a couple of things but the doctors will help me with it. I asked her to send me pictures of Peter and Rooney,then she told me to send Seongwoo Hyung pictures in return.” Seongwoo winced internally—he forgot that Daniel’s Mom took a fancy of him after they revealed their relationship to her. She welcomed him warmly to the family, and insisted to call him _‘Eomma’_ as well. It was actually weird when he forced himself to call her using ‘ _Aunty’_ earlier, the word left a tingling bad aftertaste in his mouth.

 

“Is my Mom your fans, Hyung?” Daniel asked, and Seongwoo didn’t really know how to react. “Something like that,” He finally replied, because _Eomma_ did collect his CDs, clipings from newspapers, magazines with him inside, even owned several fanmade merchandises of him. There was a big poster of him and Daniel posed side by side plastered on the Busan home. _Eomma_ was really proud of them and she actually pampered Seongwoo really well; something that made Daniel faked his sulkiness as his mother often sided with Seongwoo rather with him.

 

Daniel noticed the change on Seongwoo’s expression, but decided not to probe deeper. “She also suggested that it might be better for me to come home, living my life normally; it could probably jog my memories better than staying here in the hospital doing nothing. I feel well, so I don’t think that I need to stay here as well so… do you guys think it will be okay for me to go home?” 

 

* * *

 

**[News] Agency confirmed that Kang Daniel had regained consciousness.**

The PR just stated that _“Kang Daniel was still examined by the doctors, but yes he had regained his consciousness.”_ Fans from all over the country, and even from everseas were rejoiced with the news. The keywords ‘Kang Daniel’ ‘Kang Daniel accident’ ‘Kang Daniel conscious’ were trending on the search engines. [pic attached]

 

 

**[Pann] Kang Daniel Left Hospital**

Two hours after the agency’s statement, one of my friend saw Kang Daniel leaving the hospital with Ong Seongwoo. He was visiting his family member and when he went to the parking lot, he saw the two of them. Kang Daniel seemed to be bandaged in several places but he was fine and he could walk on his own. [pics] [pics] [pics]

**source:** **user**

[+139, -1] OMG THANKS GOD!!! It seemed that he’s okay~

[+69, -4] Can we talk about KANG DANIEL LEFT THE HOSPITAL WITH ONG SEONGWOO, GUYS???? OMG ONGNIEL!!!!  ♡ ✧ (  ु • ⌄ • )

[+57, -1] Niel left the hospital using Ongie’s personal car. OMG YASH MY FANGIRL KOKORO I’M LEGIT CRYING ꒰⁎ᵉ̷͈ ॣ꒵ ॢᵉ̷͈⁎꒱໊ I REALLY THIRSTY FOR ANY ONGNIEL MOMENT AFTER THEY WENT SEPARATE WAYS LAST DEC 2018!!

[+77, -3] It’s a relieve that Kang Daniel is confirmed okay. To leave the hospital this soon, it means he is healthy enough, right? Rest well, Niel-ah! 

[+45, -1] OMG OMG OMG ONGNIEL ONGNIELONGNIELONGNIELONGNIELONGNIEL!!!!  ⊂ ( ◉ ‿ ◉ ) つ

 

 

**[Koreaboo] ‘OngNiel’ Dominated the Search Engine’s Keyword Trending**

Fans in Korea and overseas were shocked this morning when the news of ex-WANNA ONE member and center, Kang Daniel was rushed to the hospital due the slide’s malfunction on the shooting site of new game show _DASH!Idol_ ☆ Kang Daniel’s head was hit hard during the incident and he went unconscious. He was ushered to the hospital immediately using the ambulance, but thanks God that several hours later the Agency’s PR confirmed that the star idol had regained his consciousness.

 

Kang Daniel spotted leaving the hospital with his former WANNA ONE’s member, Ong Seongwoo. Fans saw them leaving using Ong Seongwoo’s car, headed to MMO’s dorm. Yoon Jisung, fellow member from MMO, had left the site earlier due his duty as one of the MCs at KBS’s show programme. 

[video attached]

 

Right after the video and several pics taken by fans went viral, ‘OngNiel’ was trending on the search engines. The pair name was popular since their Produce 101 season 2’s era. Fans were estatic to see the bromance between Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo once again.

[pics] [pics]

 

* * *

 

 

Seongwoo’s car smelled like something familiar: a mix of faint leather scent and his cologne. The car was considered brand new—the engines work smoothly and they reached the road without any hitch. Sitting shotgun, Daniel stole glances on the ‘handsome hyung’ beside him. Seongwoo’s sharp features looks really attractive, and Daniel swore there was butterflies all over his stomach everytime Seongwoo’s smile at him.

 

“Can we play some music?” He asked, and Seongwoo’s nodded. “Just connect to the bluetooth.”

 

Daniel opened his playlist and scrolled down—his playlist consisted of many, many songs and several of the titles were totally unfamiliar as it was released recently. He scrolled some more, found a private playlist labelled as ‘Road Trip’ so he scanned the songs and recognized most of them as his all time favourites. He clicked on the first song, and the car’s speaker picked the connection right away.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _Hey, I was doing just fine before I met you_

_I drink too much and that's an issue but I'm okay_

_Hey, you tell your friends it was nice to meet them_

_But I hope I never see them again ♪_ ♫♬

 

The Chainsmoker’s song filled the car, and Seongwoo let a soft gasp—released a breath that he didn’t know he had held before. There was a sharp _pang!_ in his heart. Tightened his grip to the steering wheel, he bit his lips; heartbeats loud and noisy, drummed against his ribcage. _Why did you pick this particular song from all the songs available, Niel-ah?_ The memory came onto him, clear as day, felt fresh like it was just happened yesterday: he and Daniel laughed together. It was during the first WANNA ONE GO, the red ribbon attached to their wrist. Daniel chose the song and they sang together. Daniel fed him with the sponsored Yo-Hi biscuits, the younger’s finger brushed softly against his lips.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _I know it breaks your heart_

_Moved to the city in a broke down car_

_And four years, no calls_

_Now you're looking pretty in a hotel bar_

_And I can't stop_

_No, I can't stop ♪_ ♫♬

 

“I can’t stop~” Daniel was singing along with the song, eyes crinkled as he smiled widely to Seongwoo, “The song’s melody is good, right?” There was another _pang!_ and Seongwoo was stunned for a second before he forced himself to smile back. “Yeah,” His voice sounded weird as he answer. He did a light cough and told himself to focus on the road ahead. His chest felt tight, and somehow he wanted to cry. 

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _So baby pull me closer in the backseat of your Rover_

_That I know you can't afford_

_Bite that tattoo on your shoulder_

_Pull the sheets right off the corner_

_Of the mattress that you stole_

_From your roommate back in Boulder_

_We ain't ever getting older_

_We ain't ever getting older ♪_ ♫♬

 

After a moment that felt like an eternity, the car finally reached the MMO’s dorm. It was located in Itaewon, a couple of blocks from their previous WANNA ONE dorm. The lavish apartment was meant to be shared among the MMO trainees, though it was only Jisung and Daniel at the moment. It got a tight security, series of codes and manual checks as they entered the building. The security recognized Seongwoo and just nodded as he signalled them to proceed.

 

“Here, your elevator card,” Seongwoo’s handed the card to Daniel, “Keep it. Don’t lose it, you hear?” The younger male accepted the card, patiently listen to Seongwoo as the older male explained the front door passcode and everything. They entered the entrance, lined the outdoor shoes and changed their footwear to the indoor slippers. The living room was bright and spacious, gigantic glass panels placed on two sides of the room; the view was magnificent as they were located on the higher floor levels. 

 

“There, you’re home,” Seongwoo patted Daniel’s arm, “Now let me leave—“

 

“Wait,” Daniel held Seongwoo’s wrist immediately in response, tugged the hem of his cuffs, “You’re leaving, Hyung? Are you busy?”

 

“Well, I have a drama shooting later…” He paused as Daniel looked so dejected, so Seongwoo sighed, “But it wasn’t until the seven o’clock so I guess I have some time.” Daniel cheered right away. He pulled them to the big, black sofa and plopped themselves on the soft cushion. Nestled between the sponsored Spring Home giant plushies, Daniel was still holding Seongwoo’s hand when he asked, “So which one is your room, Hyung?”

 

Seongwoo was taken aback by the question. He was expecting Daniel to ask him about something else, about _his_ _own room_ for example. “I don’t live here, Niel-ah,” He answered. “Your room was the one near the bathroom,” He pointed on the particular door, “Jisung’s room was the one next to the kitchen. The other rooms were used as your practice and storage room.”

 

“Wait, you don’t live here Hyung?” Daniel seemed surprised with the fact, “But you are so familiar with this place. How come you’re not living here with us?”

 

Seongwoo tried to find the simplest explanation, “I visit often. But this is an MMO dorm and I’m from another agency. I’m from Fantagio.”

 

“Ah,” Daniel seemed to remembered something. Seongwoo felt his heart thumped, “Ah?”

 

“Well,” Daniel scooted closer, stared at Seongwoo’s face intensely, “It makes sense.” The older male’s heartbeats went wilder, “What do you mean with it makes sense…?” Those innocent eyes still stared straight onto Seongwoo’s eyes. His fingertips grazed the moles on Seongwoo’s cheeks, and the raven haired almost gasp in response. “Fantagio is famous for their actors, right? People called them the agency for actors. You do have an actor’s face, Hyung. You are really good looking. You are an actor, then?”

 

“I am,” His voice sound wavered, and Seongwoo hated himself for being so weak, “I was participating this drama at the moment. But mainly I’m your jack-of-all-trades idol. Modelling, variety shows, releasing my solo album… I’m an MC for Music Core as well.”

 

“You are a singer as well, Hyung? Is that how we met each other?” Those sparkles on Daniel’s eyes felt so nostalgic—the younger male often stared at him with those excited puppy eyes. Seongwoo felt that urge to cry again, but he fought it and nodded, “We used to be in a same idol group, Niel-ah.” He decided to tell him about WANNA ONE, because it was a vain attempt to dodge the fact. One keyword search and it will be all over the results. 

 

“We are…?” Daniel seemed confused, “But you said that we’re from different companies—“ 

 

It took quite a while and some articles from the search engine to explained about Produce 101 to Daniel. After all, the younger male didn’t recognize the show yet since his last memories lasted before the concept of the first season’s show released to the public. It was a bizarre concept for him, and Daniel spent more times checking the articles. 

 

“So they combined the trainees from different agencies for a certain period of time,” Daniel asked for confirmation and Seongwoo nodded. “The first season’s group is IOI, then the second season’s group is us… WANNA ONE,” Daniel clicked on the link provided and the info about WANNA ONE displayed on his phone in a jiffy. “I won the first position?!” He exclaimed, and Seongwoo laughed, “You did.”

 

It was overwhelming for Daniel: so many things happened during the latest three years and there were so many articles he could read. There were so many articles showed up when he searched for his name on the search tab. There was even a wikipedia page of him, available in several languages no less. From the glimpse, he seemed to doing well—he was really famous and considered as the one topped the Male Model Brand Power Ranking. He was recognized for his brand recognition and marketing power, even mentioned at least once a day by the media. He participated in many shows, modelled for several big brands, and there was another whole page just to list the discography of WANNA ONE.

 

“Wait, you were ranked fifth Hyung?” Daniel noticed Seongwoo’s name on the member list. His eyes furrowed, “How come that you didn’t get the first position? You are so good looking and have such a great voice…!” It was an earnest, honest opinion, and Seongwoo laughed. “You are more charming, Niel-ah.”

 

Daniel shook his head in denial, then stared on his smartphone once again. He clicked on the pictures tab, then scrolled down. It felt foreign, there were his faces all over the screen—posed in attractive, seductive pose. Some of them showed him smiling happily to the camera, eyes turned into two disappearing lines. Several of them showed him topless, the muscles on his arm and stomach were defined enough. 

 

Beside him, the ‘Seongwoo Hyung’ smiled gently, eyes soft and adoring—seemed amused with his reactions. _THUMP._ Daniel felt his chest tightened. Then as he tried to distracted himself, he noticed the latest articles; it was him and his handsome Seongwoo Hyung. The internet seemed to be hyped with the news of Seongwoo took him home; the term _‘OngNiel’_ keep mentioned on every news and articles. 

 

“Hyung…?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“What’s _‘OngNiel’_?” He asked. In a split second, Seongwoo’s smile disappeared. He went pale instead. Daniel was taken aback from the unexpected reaction. “…Hyung?!”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case you're wondering why Daniel didn't check his personal devices like smartphone and laptop etc, you'll see about them hinted in chapter 3 and explained in details in chapter 4. 
> 
> Pssttt... I might included your username for the 'media scene' on this series. I've inserted 3 username from my current commenter to the 4th chapter. So don't be surprised if you saw your username on my story LOLZ


	3. Don’t You Love Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Daniel and Seongwoo spend the first night after Daniel's incident.
> 
> And a glimpse of flashback of their relationship before Daniel's amnesia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya guys~! It's Monday morning and as promised, here's the update for 3rd chapter ^^
> 
> This series will be a really slow-burn one, so bear with me okay :)  
> As stated on previous chapter's note: Just in case you're wondering why Daniel didn't check his personal devices like smartphone and laptop etc, you'll see about them explained in details in chapter 4. This chapter Daniel fiddled with google and all via his smartphone--do Koreans use Google btw? But it's kinda weird to substitute 'go google it' with another search engine's name so... please pardon me okay? n(_ _)n 
> 
> Things will get more exciting from chapter 4 and beyond, but the 3rd chapter was quite dark. Trigger warning if you got anxiety and similar problem. I've consulted my friend in psychology major about it, so hopefully I wrote it correctly.

* * *

“Daniel…?”

It was late evening when Jisung reached their dorm. The entrance’s light was automatically light up, and he noticed that Seongwoo’s shoes wasn’t there on the _hyeon gwan_. It seemed that the Fantagio’s actor had left their dorm earlier. Jisung reached the living room and called for Daniel once again, but it was empty—the space was dark as the lights weren’t lit yet. Jisung turned on the lights and the LED lights filled the room with soft, yellowish light. The plushies on the sofa was slightly array, but no one sat there at the moment. 

 

“Niel…?” Jisung called again as he knocked on Daniel’s door. There were noises from inside, so Jisung opened the door. The room was slightly dark, but the bedside lamp was lit and there was Daniel: on the middle of the bed, sitting crosslegged, smartphone on hand and earphone plugged in. His personal laptop was abandoned on the side, near his leg. The younger male’s attention was totally absorbed into the screen, and there were Seongwoo’s solo song leaked from the earphone. The ballad was really noticeable, and Jisung tsk-ed since he wondered how loud Daniel had set the volume. _No wonder you didn’t hear my call, tsk this brat!_

 

Third time was a charm, as Daniel finally noticed him when Jisung called him for the third times. “Niel-ah…!” His voice was loud enough to grab the younger’s attention, so Daniel took off the earphone and grinned. “Oh, Jisung Hyung. You’re back.”

 

“What are you reading—“ Then the older male realized Seongwoo’s photo on the screen, “Wait, you’re googling Seongwoo?” Daniel just grinned in response, showed Jisung his current tab: it was a fan blog, listed the Fantagio’s actor profile in details.

 

===

**Name:**  Ong Seongwoo ( 옹성우 )

**Birthday:**  August 25, 1995

**Zodiac:**  Virgo

**Nationality:** Korean

**Height:** 179 cm (5’10″)

**Blood Type:** A

 

**ONG SEONGWOO’S FACTS**

– Ong Seongwoo was born in Incheon, South Korea

– He has an older sister

– He ended PD101 on the 5th rank with a total of 984,756 votes

– He went to Hanlim Multi Art School in Seoul

– He is a very good dancer, especially popping and freestyle

– He play the drums skilfully. See the video  here.

– One of his special skill is folding his ears. After he folds his ears he can unfold them without touching them.

– During Produce 101 many participants said that they consider Ong Seongwoo as the group’s mood maker. Ong Seongwoo hates to be called ‘no fun’.

– Ong Seungwoo, Kang Daniel, and Yoon Jisung used to share a room on WANNA ONE’s first dorm. After they moved to Itaewon’s dorm, Ong Seongwoo’s roommate is Kang Daniel.

– Ong Seungwoo and Kang Daniel’s combi name is OngNiel. They were close since the P101 season 2 era. On Dangerous Outside The Blanket episode, Kang Daniel revealed that they gradually got closer during Nayana practice after he was placed on the A class along with Ong Seongwoo and they clicked right away.

– After WANNA ONE disbanded at December 2018, Ong Seongwoo also tried acting. Fantagio had released several short movies and he was scheduled to play the second male lead on the upcoming Summer’s Constellation drama.

**see more**

===

 

“Well, I was curious,” Daniel shrugged his shoulders when Jisung raised his eyebrows and gave him _the look_. “Seongwoo Hyung didn’t own any social media. He got no Instagram account, no Facebook, none, zip, nada, none. His profile on Fantagio’s page also didn’t list much information about him else than some basic data. It’s easier just to googling for the articles and fan’s posts about him.”

 

“Well, you can ask him directly—“

 

“I did. He seemed to be disturbed by it and avoided the topic,” Daniel frowned, looked dejected. For a split second, Jisung could see a giant samoyed sulking with dropped ears. “I noted that ‘OngNiel’ was mentioned a lot on the articles about me and him, so I asked him about him. He went pale all of the sudden and started stammering.”

 

_Oh._ Jisung winced as he imagined the scene. Daniel failed to notice the older’s expression, so he continued further, “I asked if he is okay and he looked like he wanted to cry. He excused himself and practically ran away, eventhough he said he got some time until later evening. I really, really wanted to know more about him… and our relationship during these three years… so I did my research like this.”

 

_Aish, these stupid couple…_ Jisung felt a headache. After all, he did notice that eventhough he lost his memories, Daniel seemed to be attracted to Seongwoo just the same. Have watched the interactions between the lovebirds closely as he did live with the two of them for a quite long period of time, Jisung couldn’t understand why Seongwoo was so keen to keep his relationship with Daniel as a secret. It’s a rather futile attempt, just like he reasoned with Seongwoo earlier. But Seongwoo was so determined, so Jisung gave in as he knew that Seongwoo must own his own reasonings that he resorted to plead him like this. 

 

In the other hand Daniel whom oblivious about his relationship with Seongwoo, clearly fell head over heels once again. He seemed eager to pursue Seongwoo, something that Jisung had witnessed before during their Produce 101 era. Had raised this particular brat since their trainee years like his own son, Jisung often positioned himself like Daniel’s second mother; he had no heart to see his _dongsaeng_ sad or worse, broken-hearted.

 

He tried to forget the last message Seongwoo sent to the group chat; the one consisted of all WANNA ONE members, sans Daniel. Seongwoo told everyone about Daniel’s amnesia, and asked them to keep his relationship with Daniel as a secret from him. Just like Jisung, most of the members didn’t understand Seongwoo’s action and asked him why.

 

_Please_ , Seongwoo pleaded, _I have my own reasons._

 

But he didn’t tell them his reasons, and Jisung suspected the so called reasons to be the same reason why Daniel and Seongwoo constantly argue all these years. While the free spirited Daniel was blissfuly in love and enjoyed their relationship, Seongwoo lived his life in constant fear of the public found out about their relationship and ended as a scandal that will shatter Daniel’s future. Even with their family and close friends’s blessing, the anxiety never leave Seongwoo’s heart. He often tortures himself by thinking that he robbed Daniel’s future—as it was difficult for them to legally formed a family in Korea. 

 

_“I couldn’t give you a child, Niel-ah,”_ Jisung once heard Seongwoo fussed about the matter. Daniel had reassured Seongwoo that he didn’t mind and they could adopt or if Seongwoo really insist, a surrogate. But Seongwoo argued that it will not be the same and keep worrying about the matter.

 

_“I only need you, Seongwoo-ya,”_ Daniel patiently replied, _“Kids or no kids. I love you, for you. Nothing else matters. I just need you to be by my side, to spend our future together.”_

 

_“We cannot wed here, Niel-ah,”_ Seongwoo argued again, and Daniel looked tired as he had already done these same arguments over and over again. _“Yeah, but we can get legally married at Canada instead, Seongwoo-ya. My aunt lives there, she can help us.”_

 

It was an endless circle of arguments. Sometimes, whenever Daniel replied back with _“I just want us to be together no matter what. I love you nevertheless and I just need you to believe in me.”_ Seongwoo would cave in and didn’t push the arguments further. But in some bad days, the older male would defy all Daniel’s answer and keep founding faults in himself or the prospect of their love relationship. _“The scandal will cause you your future and your career, Niel-ah!”_ Jisung once overheard Seongwoo’s wails. _“My career? My future? I don’t care about it, Seongwoo-ya! You matter more to me—why did you even call our relationship a scandal? Don’t you love me?!”_

 

It was chaos whenever the two of them argue. Both of them love each other, but they differ in personalities. Their point of view clashed; as Daniel faced the world with such confidence and living his life using his carefree attitude while Seongwoo was more cautious and often succumbed into his self-doubt. He would proceed to punish himself with such grief and overthinking, and Daniel couldn’t see eye to eye with Seongwoo about the matter.

 

_I don’t get it_ , Daniel told Jisung before, _I just want to be happy with him. I want us to be together. Being happy as a couple. It doesn’t matter what other people think. Why Seongwoo always make such a big deal about it?_

 

Jisung couldn’t blame Seongwoo for his anxiety and insecurities, but he also couldn’t bear to see their relationship spiralled away when Seongwoo retreated himself from Daniel like this. The brunette sighed and plopped himself on the armchair next to Daniel’s bed. “You can ask me,” He offered, “Ask me about anything you want to know. I’ll tell you in details about whatever happened in these three years you couldn’t remember. I’ll explained all to you: Produce 101, WANNA ONE, about our members, about Seongwoo, everything. Just ask.”

 

Daniel’s eyes sparkled, and Jisung smiled weakly. _Well, I’m sorry Seongwoo. I did promise not to tell about you guys being lovers, but I never say that I won’t help Niel to pursue you once more all over again._

 

* * *

 

 

Hours later, at his own apartment, Seongwoo lied on his bed. He just reached home after finished his drama’s shooting. While he did a good job on the site earlier, he was exhausted at the moment. It didn’t help that as he was alone, his drained emotions hammered him down ever more. He stared on the alabaster white ceiling blankly—his mind was muddled as he got too many thoughts inside his head. He felt suffocated, unhappy. 

 

_Is this my punishment?_ He asked himself. He was the one who brought it—to keep his relationship with Daniel a secret. He forced Jisung and the rest of WANNA ONE’s member to follow his selfish request. He got his own reasons of course, though he didn’t tell them. It was hard to spell them out, but somehow he felt like Jisung knew about it. Maybe that’s why the former leader didn’t push him much and actually agreed to his whims.

 

He hates it when he must acted like that was nothing between him and Daniel. He hates to call _Eomma_ with a mere ‘Aunty’—after all Daniel’s mother had treated him like his own son and he loves her as much as Daniel loves her. He winces internally everytime Daniel called him with _‘Hyung’._ The honorifics felt so foreign; Daniel always calls him with his name whenever they were in private. Yes, he would addressed Seongwoo as Hyung in front of the media, but he never did that whenever they were alone. 

 

When it was just the two of them, Daniel would called him affectionately with _Seongwoo-ya._ Or teasing Seongwoo with _Ongchongie-ya_ if he did something clumsy as usual. But never with a formal _‘Hyung_ ’. The younger male always pampered and spoiled him, patiently catered to Seongwoo’s demands. He hates it when Daniel didn’t put his whole attention to him—heck, he even jealous whenever Daniel got immersed into his gaming, playing those online games on his laptop. He knew he often reacted like those girls whom got jealous whenever their boyfriends preferred to play games instead of spending time with them. He just couldn’t help it—he did try to play the game with Daniel, but he was lousy and the controller was difficult to master. He got frustrated as he panicked easily during the game, and even used to harbouring unnecessary jealousy towards Jihoon—the Maroo Ent. trainee was good on those games and often plays together with Daniel.

 

_I just want to talk and spend time together with you,_ he whined, and Daniel being Daniel, would eventually log out from the game and cuddled with him instead. _Yeah, yeah. I’m here._

 

They argued often despite of all that—and Seongwoo knew that he often acts unreasonable as he was the one whom picked the fight. He would nit-picking about everything, imagined thousands of negative cases that could happen just because they were lovers. Daniel was patient with him, assured that he didn’t care about anything else than the two of them, but Seongwoo couldn’t act to be such an ignorant.

 

Idols live under the public’s scrutinizing eyes, one thing went amiss and everything will be off. He saw too many cases of small, sometimes ridiculous matters got blowed out of proportion and actually ended someone’s career. He loves his job, his career as an entertainer—and he knew Daniel does too. The younger male own a great talent with such a bright, successful future. And Seongwoo fears that somehow he would destroy Daniel’s future as the cost of their relationship.

 

_Why did you even call our relationship a scandal? Don’t you love me?!_ Daniel once yelled at him with totally frustrated tone. The brunette’s body was shaking with anger, and it pained Seongwoo to see Daniel’s stressed state like that. In fact, he hated himself as he was the one who pushed Daniel into the corner like that. 

 

_I’m sorry_ , He apologized before, _I do love you, Niel-ah. I love you so much, too much._

 

But his anxiety and insecurities never left. Those dark emotions roots deep inside of him, and Seongwoo couldn’t bring himself to get some guidances from professional’s help. Chemicals won’t do him any better, those SSRIs anti-depressant won’t solve his problem. He just want to talk things to someone, to sort his feelings out, but the fear of resulting another big scandal stopped him from doing anything. He couldn’t trust anyone, feared that they would stabbed him in the back and ruined everything he had. The more happy he was with Daniel, the bigger his fear grow—it felt like a beast lurked in the shadow, patiently waiting for their downfall. So he held himself from enjoying his happiness; he was afraid that once something went array and everythingturned into a mess, he couldn’t survive the loss.

 

“I love you…” He whispered faintly in the dark. He covered his face using his palms, the tears rolled down onto his pillow, “I’m sorry that I’m testing you this way, Niel-ah…” His sobs went louder. He hiccuped, tears escaped endlessly from his eyes. _This is one of the moments I doubted myself—do I deserve you? Am I worthy for such happiness—?_

 

He knew that he didn’t play fair as he tried to conceal their relationship from Daniel. The younger male deserved to know the truth, but Seongwoo thought it might be his chance to see if the younger male will have any change of heart after he lost his memories. 

 

It was utterly devastating when Daniel didn’t recognize him and asked who is he earlier in the hospital. If the latter didn’t regain his previous memories and wanted to move on, Seongwoo will let him. This way, he could atone his doings by letting Daniel free—away from him.

 

_Is it really the best? Do you really doing these selfish things for him, hmmm?_ The voice inside his head mocked him, and Seongwoo frowned. He was totally at loss. _Am I doing… the right thing?_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pssttt... I might included your username for the 'media scene' on this series. I've inserted 3 username from my current commenter to the 4th chapter. So don't be surprised if you saw your username on my story LOLZ


	4. What are you doing here….?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What are you doing here….?”  
> The man was taken aback. He had waited for several hours, sitting in front of the apartment door until his body felt stiff and his back especially hurts—he was worried sick that something happened to the person whom stood in front of him now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiyyyaaa guys~!  
> It's another Monday morning, so it's time for the update :))
> 
> I added 'slow-burn' on the tag. This series is slow paced, after all. Just in case you haven't notice, this chapter is practically the day after Daniel's incident. Daniel still tried to figure out about everything, including his personal devices ;)

* * *

Daniel typed series of letters into the box, but after he hit the ENTER button the pop up box buzzed and asked him to insert the correct password. There was a smaller red sentences lined under the password box area: _Incorrect password. Please re-type the correct one to enter._

 

“Argh…!” He scratched his head, “What’s the password?! Ugh—“

The first thing Daniel checked to collected some data after his memory lost was of course his personal devices. He could unlocked his ipad and smartphone using his thumbprint and face recognition, so he was able to reset his own password for the phone, but his laptop was password-protected and the current him didn’t remember the password at all. He had tried to enter bunch of old passwords he used to have, but none of them matched. Worse, the previously he didn’t set the ‘hint’ box so he was totally clueless about the password.

 

The ipad didn’t help much. Jisung told him that he only using the device on several occasion. Most of the app installed there was game apps, including the one he modelled. The bookmarks on his browser were mostly webtoon links, while his search history was totally random. So he still google the unknown term Jisung muttered after he acted like he understand the topic then? The gallery was empty—the camera quality was not bad, but he preferred his smartphone camera; so he knew why he didn’t take any pic using the ipad.

 

His smartphone didn’t help him much either—apparently he had just changed his phone into the newer model. His current phone got several game apps, a note-taking app he used to write rap lyrics, custom selfie camera and editing apps, with several social networking app. He got the Instagram and Twitter app—apparently he had set his account into private using a generic username, and he barely post anything. He probably using them just for checking the trends (or stalking the media) since Jisung told him about him deactivated his social media account after the ‘four cats emoji’ incident during Produce 101 era.He got high hope when he noticed the LINE and KTalk app, but his chats mostly consisted of daily chats with his friends—some of them were unfamiliar while some if them are big idols he idolized. Heck, he’s friend with LOCO Hyung?? The AOMG rapper asked him if he was fine, so he replied that he’s okay. LOCO promised to treat him for some beer later whenever their day off matched. Most of the chats were indeed asking if he was okay after the accident. He replied to them, explained that he was okay but doctor advised him to rest properly. Most of them agreed and suggested that he used his precious day off to recuperate well.

 

He had painstakingly searched for his chat with Seongwoo Hyung, but there were only random chats and topics recorded there. He seemed to spammed his chat with Seongwoo Hyung with game’s invitation, several meme shitposting, and old-man jokes. There were several normal conversation about food, places to visit, grocery shopping and several _I miss you_ and _I love you_ he sent to Seongwoo, only to be ignored or refuted. It seemed like he love to tease Seongwoo Hyung using lovey dovey remarks. In some occasion, Seongwoo seemed to gave up and replied _Yeah, I know_ or _Yeah, I love you too Niel-ah_ but there was nothing out of ordinary. 

 

“What are we, Hyung?” He whispered. _A normal former groupmate? Affectionate sunbae and dongsaeng? A close friend—best buddies?_ He did remember those articles—they seemed close. After all they even got a pairing name, though WANNA ONE members got several other pairing couple like PanWink, Pink Sausages, WinkDeep, DeepHwi, NielWink, HwangDeep, OngHwang, etc. 

 

The group chats were chaos and jumped into random topics. A lot of shitposting memes and conversation about events and TV shows and newest games. He hadn’t gathered his courage to type anything to the group chat—the members beside Jisung Hyung and Seongwoo Hyung were unfamiliar to the current him. Maybe later, after he brave enough to join the chat.

 

His phone gallery was consisted mostly of scenery photos, cats photos, his selfies and many group photos. There was one locked folder with a black cat emoji, but he couldn’t opened the folder as well—he tried several times but none of the password worked. “Damn,” He sighed. _Another password mystery added to the list._

 

Daniel threw his phone to the side; the smartphone plopped onto the bed cover, the screen was still lit up. His wallpaper for the lock-screen was a group photo of WANNA ONE while his home screen displayed an artistic photo of a black cat with amber coloured eyes. The lock-screen gave him a sense of nostalgia, a deja vu—silly, as it was his group and it was him who forgot about them; but he wondered about his home-screen wallpaper for a while. 

 

It would be reasonable if he displayed his own pet cats, but this particular black cat wasn’t his and from the file on his gallery he was sure he downloaded it from Pinterest instead. He fonds of cats, sure—but why did he display a random black cat on his phone? It indeed goes well with the monochrome theme he was using, but he believed that his past self got his own reason for choosing the cat. 

 

After all, there’s a locked folder labelled with black cat emoji on his gallery—the one he couldn’t access since he didn’t know the password. He locked the folder using an app, but after he checked the app’s configurations there wasn’t any clue about his forgotten password. To reset the password, he need the old password as well. This whole mumbo jumbo about forgotten password made him crazy—there were valuable informations about himself within his reach, but he couldn’t access them as he was locked out from them. What a joke.

 

He had asked Jisung of course, but the older male didn’t know anything about his passwords. From the beginning, it was a futile attempt as Daniel knew himself—he won’t share his important informations like password and such to anyone else.

 

“I’m bored…” He was saying his sentence aloud, eventhough there wasn’t anyone will hear it. Jisung went for his schedule, being a guest for a variety show as the commentator. It should be nice to have a time off so he could rest, but the memory loss agitated him. He was restless as he want to collect the missing pieces as soon as possible. His hospital visit had been scheduled for tomorrow, but he got nothing to do at the moment. 

 

_Should I go out?_ Daniel pondered, remembering Jisung’s inctructions to:

 

  1. ******Informed the bodyguards about the details about destination, his activities, his entourage, etc whenever he go.** (How awesome is that? He has TWO bodyguards for God’s sake! Apparently they were tailing him using another car when Seongwoo brought him home last time)
  2. ******Wear a hat or/and mask if you want to go somewhere. Basically if you do want some privacy and not mobbed to death by your fans, please dressed incognito in public.** (Jisung rolled his eyes with a _‘duh?’_ face when he blurted “Wait, I have fans?” earlier)
  3. ******But please use the sponsored clothing and accessories if he did visit somewhere as ‘The Celebrity Kang Daniel’** (Apparently he got a personal stylist as well. The list of the sponsored goods were listed on the folder near the walk-in-closet. Yes, they do own a walk-in-closet now OMG)
  4. ******In any emergency, please contact their manager or Jisung himself.** (And Ong Seongwoo Hyung is an okay option too. Jisung was silent for three whole seconds before nodding “Okay, Seongwoo is OK” when Daniel asked about the Fantagio actor)
  5. ******DO NOT CREATE ANY SCANDAL. EVER. BEHAVE YOURSELF IN PUBLIC, PERIOD.** (Jisung seriously emphasized this point!) 



 

It felt bizarre: the fact that he was famous, with a lot of fans—he even need protection from bodyguards for it. When he was a mere trainee, he was free to do anything as he was a nobody and no one will pay attention to him. He was free to visit anywhere, hang out with his friends without worrying about privacy and paparazzi, what he said and done won’t be the next day’s headline.

 

It was indeed a price he need to pay—the exchange of his ‘privacy’ for fame and career. But deep down, Daniel felt this version of ‘The Celebrity Kang Daniel’ of him won’t mind about it. At least, he does enjoy dancing and performing, to bring joy to his audience after watching him performed on stage.

 

For a moment, Daniel hesitated—then he took his phone.

 

* * *

 

“What are you doing here….?”

The man was taken aback. He had waited for several hours, sitting in front of the apartment door until his body felt stiff and his back especially hurts—he was worried sick that something happened to the person whom stood in front of him now. He was relieved as he saw the elevator opened and the owner of the apartment room showed up, but his beloved showed him a cold face instead. 

 

He felt like he was doused in icy water. “I…” He stammered, “I… just want to see you…” His tone weakened as he could see that the latter’s expression didn’t soften at all. Instead of a smile, he heard an annoyed _tsk_ and cruelly he was told, “I’ve said that I’m busy, right?”

 

It was silence as he slowly formed his sentences. “I miss you—You had been busy for days, I just want to spend a little time with you…” He was confused to be treated like this. Did he do something wrong? Their relationship was used to be good, had been together for half a year now—they never quarrel but it was hard to meet his beloved these days. “Hae In-ah—?”

 

Then the evelator’s door opened once again with a loud _DING_. 

 

A man showed up and approached them with long strides. “Ah…” Suddenly, Kim Tae Woo realized why his lover didn’t happy to see him at all, instead acted impatiently as she wanted for him to leave immediately. Hae In furrowed her brows, awkwardly casted her gaze to the floor. Not noticing the tension between the lovers, the oblivious Seo Jun casually put his hand on Hae In’s shoulder while showing the plastic bag he carried. “I’ve brought drinks and snacks. Oh, who is this…?”

 

Being asked who is he by another man in front of his supposed girlfriend, Kim Tae Woo finally get enough. This Seo Jun was Hae In’s first love, an upperclasman she adored for a long time. During their school days, Tae Woo who stuck in the friendzone had witnessed his best friend’s effort to get close to the elusive _sunbae_. It took years for Hae In to notice Tae Woo’s love for her and finally his ‘best friend’ became his girlfriend. But now Seo Jun was here, with Hae In—and Tae Woo muttered a deadpanned reply. “I understand. I’m no one important.”

 

He brushed past them and quickly walked to the elevator—his expression was grim, tinged with disappointment and sadness. 

 

“Aaanndd CUT!”

The director yelled his order with a wide grin. “Your expression is good, Seongwoo. Keep it up for the next scene, okay!” 

 

Seongwoo nodded politely. The next take was the scene between the male and female lead, so he got some time for a while. He took his water bottle, take a sip and sat down on a chair in the corner. Just he took his script to re-memorize his lines, a female staff hurriedly approached him with a blushing face.

 

“Ong Seongwoo-ssi, someone is looking for you,” She looked so excited, body trembled as she flailed her hands quite a bit. Her cheeks was red, a wide grin plastered on her face. “Should I tell him to come inside or—“

 

“Someone?” Seongwoo’s brows knitted, “Who is it?”

 

It took a while as the staff keep pointing at the door and blushing. “Ah, it’s Kang Daniel-ssi. He said he was looking for you.” Seongwoo went speechless, and as it was on cue, Daniel entered the set along with his manager. His manager is a strict woman, but at the moment she was swooning over Daniel. Several other staffs were fangirling from afar, and Daniel politely bowed to them. “Pardon my intrusion, I’m Kang Daniel.”

 

Seongwoo held his breath. The vision in front of him seemed like a mirage; like a movie scene played in slow motion. Daniel was there, smiling brightly, waving at him. “Seongwoo Hyung…!” He called cheerfully, his whole mannerism looked like a giant dog wagging its tail after seeing its owner. Slowly, Seongwoo stood up and put his script on the chair. Daniel skipped for a few steps then stopped in front of him. “Hey,” He nudged Seongwoo’s side, and it took a second for Seongwoo to react.

 

“What are you doing here….?”

He winced after said his sentence. It was the exact sentence Hae In said to Tae Woo during the previous scene. It felt like a deja vu, though Seongwoo’s tone wasn’t that harsh. Overall he sounded confused, surprised, rather than annoyed. His heartbeats were rapidly quickens though, drummed against his ribcages.

 

“I just want to see you,” Daniel’s reply sounded like Tae Woo’s dialogue, but said in a cheerful manner, “I miss you Hyung. You left so early yesterday, and I want to talk more with you.”

 

“Ah—“

 

“I called your number a few times, but you seemed to turn your phone off during the shooting,” Daniel glanced at Seongwoo’s manager, “So I asked my manager for Jihyo Noona’s number.” Addressed intimately as _Noona_ , Seongwoo’s manager’s smile went wider. “He was asking for you, so I told him that you’re shooting for the drama. Since today’s schedule will ended in two hours or so, Daniel asked if it is possible to have dinner together with you. I said okay, since he already brought his bodyguards along.”

 

Seongwoo couldn’t bring himself to be angry for his manager’s one sided decision. After all, he didn’t tell her about the situation between Daniel and him. Daniel done this a couple of times before, asking his manager for Seongwoo’s schedule whenever he couldn’t contacted Seongwoo directly, so they could spend some time together. It was Daniel’s manager whom contacted her though, and today was the first time Daniel spoke with her directly, asking for permission. Since it happened for a few times already, his manager agreed immediately—plus the famous Noona killer asked her for permission with such cute and friendly attitude.

 

“I still got several scenes though,” Seongwoo said, but the smile on Daniel’s face never wavered. “It’s okay, Hyung,” He said, “I have free time anyway. I’ll wait for you.”

“…okay.”

 

* * *

 

 

**[Pann] Kang Daniel Visited Ong Seongwoo’s Shooting Location**

My older brother worked as one of the filming staff for Ong Seongwoo’s latest drama Summer’s Constellation. He massaged me that Kang Daniel visited Ong Seongwoo on the site.  

[pics] [pics]

He wasn’t a fan and rarely know any idol, but he said that Kang Daniel is very polite and friendly, addressing the staff with respect and behaved nicely while waiting for Ong Seongwoo to finish his scenes. He actually gave his autograph whenever a staff requested him, so my brother asked one for me. 

[pics]

After the shooting, Kang Daniel left with Ong Seongwoo. My brother heard from another staff that the two of them planned to have dinner together.

 

[+48, -1] OMG MY FANGIRLING HEART CANNOT— ლ(́ ◉ ◞౪◟◉ ‵ლ)

[+107, -3] It seemed like Kang Daniel was well after the incident. He left the hospital on the same day, so he must be okay. Eat a lot and stay healthy. Fightning, Niel-ah!

[+139,-19] So many OngNiel moments lately. First Ong Seongwoo took Daniel home from hospital, and now this. And those haters said that OngNiel was over. I want to shove this news to their faces!

 

\--

 

**[News]** Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo spotted on Myeong-Dong. They strolled the street together, followed by two bodyguards.

[pics] [pics] [pics]

**taken from Naver**

 

**@OngNiel_is_Science10969**

[video attached]

I SAW KANG DANIEL AND ONG SEONGWOO ON THE STREET!!!  ♡ ฅ ( ᐤ ˊ ꒳ ฅ ˋ ᐤ ♪)

**via twitter**

 

**@Lu_Yeon**

[pics] [pics] [pics] [pics]

Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo went to a _jokbal_ place in Myeong-Dong. Look at Daniel’s smile!!!

**via twitter**

 

**@prettysmole**

[pics]

#OngNiel entered the _jokbal_ place together. Daniel held the door for Seongwoo? What a gentleman! （ *’ ∀ ’ 人） ♥

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

 

Corner table, second floor. The delicious smell of the cooked food filled the air. The first floor was crowded, but there were less people on the second floor. Daniel picked the corner booth, the one next to the big potted plant—the giant leaves gave them some privacy as they were half covered from the public’s eyes.

 

Seongwoo held the menu using both hands, half-covered himself from Daniel. The younger male sat in front of him, cheerfully ordering the set and additional menu while pointing the pictures on the menu. The waiter nodded as he scrawled the order on his notepad, “…set A, with extra _mandu_.Okay. Anything else?”

 

Daniel’s focus shifted as he turned to Seongwoo. “Do you want anything else, Hyung? Beer? Soju?” Those eye-smiles punched Seongwoo with a dramatic _BANG!_ “Ah,” He stammered. _OMG you have no idea how I miss those smiles of yours, Niel-ah._ “No,” He coughed, “It’s enough.”

 

“Okay, that’s all for now.” Daniel nodded, still smiling politely to the waiter as he handed his menu back. Reluctantly, Seongwoo gave away his menu to the waiter, following Daniel’s action. After the waiter left their table, Daniel leaned forward—the honey drizzled smile appeared once again. “You love _jokbal_ , don’t you Hyung?”

 

“You… remembered?” Seongwoo’s heart drummed wildly inside his chest. He felt like his heart was ready to burst, or jump out from his mouth. There’s a faint ring in his ears. His past memories surfaced: it was after Music Bank recording. Daniel plopped himself beside him, leaned in as he wrapped one of his arms around Seongwoo’s shoulder, whispering _Hyung, you love_ jokbal _right? Want to eat some later?_

 

They visited this _jokbal_ place several times before. Usually they opted for delivery, but once in a while they did visit the place. Like today, they usually sat on the second floor. The set menu Daniel ordered was the one they used to order. It felt like a deja vu, or more like their usual date—It’s like Daniel never lost his memories and the whole amnesia thing was a mere prank, a rather elaborate joke.

 

“Mmmm,” In front of him, Daniel hesitated, “I’m sorry, Hyung. Actually I still don’t remember anything. I googled your profiles and they said you love _jokbal_ , so I asked my manager about it. He said we often visited this place.”

 

There was an awful sinking feeling in Seongwoo’s stomach, and Daniel was quick to notice how the older male’s expression changed. “I’m sorry, Hyung,” He grabbed Seongwoo hands, “Don’t be mad with me please. I don’t mean to upset you.”

 

Those hands felt warm, and Seongwoo almost whimpered. Daniel tightened his fingers, “I just… want to see you. I want to talk with you, Hyung. I want to ask you about a lot of things. From the news, we seemed close, so you must knew a lot of things about me. I… I just really want to spend more time with you. Don’t be mad, please.”

 

“I’m not mad,” Seongwoo’s reply sounded weird, butchered as he chocked in the middle of his sentence. “I’m not mad, Niel-ah. No worries,” He quickly added, squeezed Daniel’s hands in return.

 

This was one of the moments Seongwoo couldn’t understand himself. His whole thoughts were in a big mess. He was in a daze after he finished changing his clothes and saw Daniel in front of his waiting room’s door, smiling sweetly with those sparkles in his eyes. “Let’s go,” Daniel said, and something tinged Seongwoo’s heart. The impact of seeing Daniel during his drama set gave him a rather peculiar feeling. His emotions were torn between his own and the lingering after-effects from Tae Woo’s lament. He wanted to create some distance with his amnesiac lover, but in the same time there was an urge to hug the latter—told him about their relationship. He was on his edge, wanted to let Daniel knew about the truth; but his ego held him back.

 

_No,_ he said to himself, _It’s not time yet._

 

But here they are—in the same _jokbal_ place they used to visit before, ordering the same dish. Daniel was sitting there in front of him, smiled as he offered to feed him some shredded meat from the _jokbal_ , urged Seongwoo to accept it and eat from his chopsticks. Daniel did these thousand times before, and Seongwoo felt like crying. Slowly, he leaned in and ate the meat—faked his smile when Daniel asked him if it was delicious.

 

_No,_ Seongwoo repeated himself, _It’s not time yet. Not yet._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've mentioned [_'hyeon gwan' ___](https://shihyenshoes.wordpress.com/2012/10/01/house-slippers-and-the-culture-of-taking-shoes-off-indoors/) _ _for a couple of times and probably will do again the future.__  
>   
>  Hyeon Gwan is a small area just inside the front door where people take their shoes off before entering the house or building. There may also be a shoe box or rack in this area to put shoes in. In Japan, this box is called ‘geta bako’ (下駄箱) which literally translates as geta-box, and located on the genkan.  
> 


	5. Do you want to have some ramyeon on my place, before you go…?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People used to say _the night is still young_ and Daniel shared the sentiment.  
>  He was giddy from all the excitement—Seongwoo laughed when he told a joke; the older male looked so beautiful under the moonlight. Daniel didn’t want the moment to end, he wanted to spend more time with his Hyung.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya lovelies~!! It's another Monday morning and yay that means a chapter update woohooooo~~
> 
> FYI just in case you guys are wondering, the 'ramen thing' on the chapter title was indeed inspired from Secretary Kim ahahaha~  
> You can read more about the slang term's explanation [here](http://koreabizwire.com/koreas-answer-to-netflix-chill-wanna-eat-ramen-before-you-go/94377) and [here.](https://myseouldream.com/2016/03/11/koreas-netflix-and-chill/)

* * *

 

It was cliche but time felt like it was flying by. It passed so quickly, and the watch on Daniel’s wrist showed that it was almost midnight. They have eaten the _jokbal_ , along with the _mandu_ and so many plates of available _banchan_. The dishes were delicious and overall they have a great time. Seongwoo told Daniel about interesting things during their Produce 101 season 2, about their group battle, about Daniel’s Sorry Sorry viral fancam, their Get Ugly moments, about his viral thigh sweep dance during Open Up—almost everything. Almost, because basically Daniel will mentioned about something he had read on the articles and Seongwoo would told him the details about it—except the fact that they got closer during those times. 

 

Seongwoo had emptied a whole bottle of soju, as he need the alcohol to loosen his tongue over the night. _Not to loose_ , he reminded himself. That’s why he limited himself for a bottle of soju, since his alcohol limit was a measly two bottles. On the other hand, Daniel found out about his five bottles limit and actually drank two bottle of soju along with a can of _hite_ beer. “It got my face on it!” He happily exclaimed, “Wow. I rarely drink three years ago…” Daniel was barely passed 20 in his own memory, and he hadn’t drank a lot before. He said that it was fascinating to found out that suddenly he got such high tolerance. “I’ll stop at two bottles tonight,” He solemnly said, “I don’t want to have hangover tomorrow.”

 

Seongwoo wanted to say that the Kang Daniel he know would drank those five bottles and got no hangover on the next day, but he kept it for himself. Better safe than sorry. It was getting late and finally Daniel asked for the bill, insisted that he will be the one paying because he was the one who asked Seongwoo out for a dinner. 

 

They stepped out from the store; Seoul’s night air was crisp and cold. Neon signs on the streets were bright and colourful. People used to say t _he night is still young_ and Daniel shared the sentiment. He was giddy from all the excitement—Seongwoo laughed when he told a joke; the older male looked so beautiful under the moonlight. Daniel didn’t want the moment to end, he wanted to spend more time with his Hyung. Should he say something to the older male—? Should he ask—? But what if Seongwoo got an early schedule tomorrow…?

 

“Niel-ah.”

“Hyung—“

 

Both of them said it on the same time, and Seongwoo bit his lip bashfuly. “You said it first.” Daniel shifted his weight from one leg to the other, “Ah… No. Hyung, you said it first. What is it?” The two of them awkwardly asked each other to convey their message first. Finally Seongwoo tossed his pride and cave in. “Do you want to have some ramyeon on my place, before you go…?”

 

He cursed himself right after. It was the first thing popped up on his mind and he blurted it out without a second thought. It was embarrassing as the words got a hidden meaning, the same thing with America’s ‘Netflix and Chill’. _Stupid, stupid, stupid! You and your stupid mouth, myself…!_ Seongwoo scolded himself.

 

“We just ate our dinner though,” Daniel replied innocently, and Seongwoo wondered if three years ago Daniel was an innocent boy who never heard or have any idea about the euphemism. “Sorry Niel-ah, I—“

 

“I won’t say no for some coffee though,” Daniel grinned, his white teeth showed. Cheekily he nudged himself to Seongwoo’s side after he put his black mask on, covering the lower half of his face. “Thanks for inviting me, Hyung.”

 

“….no problem, Niel-ah.”

 

* * *

 

**[peachking_07 | Tumblr] Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo Spent The Night Together?**

We all know one of the hottest trending topic right now is OngNiel. The keyword was trending not only on our search engines, but on social media especially on Twitter and Instagram. While the previous day we all were devastated after we heard about  **Kang Daniel’s incident** , he was fine and able to leave the hospital on the same day.

[pics]

The catch? It was  **Ong Seongwoo whom drove him back to his apartment** . Pictures went viral and their fans (including me) went berserk. We are so thirsty for their interaction since their WANNA ONE days—admit it that the couple was lovey dovey outside the camera lens (or whenever they thought no one notice/watching) but there were only a few official moments of them captured on record.

[pics] [pics] [pics]

 

Of course we won’t forget about the legendary  **Descendants of The Sun parody** during Happy Together. Here’s some compilations of their OngNiel moments as well:

[embed video]

and this one:

[embed video]

 

Fans are rejoicing the fact that after their disbandment on December 2018, Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo still seemed to be close and occasionally hanging out together. Especially after the accident, they were practically showering us with so many joyful occassions.  **Kang Daniel was visiting Ong Seongwoo on his drama set location** and then spotted  **eating dinner together in a jokbal place in Myeong-Dong** . (You wanna bet that jokbal place will be crowded by fans tomorrow, fellas?)

 

Moreover,  **they were spotted leaving together using Ong Seongwoo’s car** . It headed to Itaewon, and we all knew that both of MMO’s dorm and Seongwoo’s apartment was located on that area. So it was a possibility that they will spend the night together as well! The question is: Daniel’s dorm or Seongwoo’s apartment? 

 

**sources:** [link] [link] [link] [link] [link] [link]

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo’s apartment was a cozy two-bedroom unit with open area concept. Dominated in wood tones and earth colours, it emitted a warm vibe. Right after the _hyeon gwan,_ his spacious living room merged with the modern kitchen seamlessly. There was a long build-in island used as the dining table, separated the area. Seongwoo was using the master bedroom as his room, and the other one was used as a walk-in-closet/storage place. An L shaped stairs was placed near the east corner, headed to the mezzanine that used as a mini office.

 

There’s a mix of cotton and bergamot in the air—the reed diffuser was placed on the shelves, next to books of poems and self-help books. There were also some rows of scented candles in a glass jar. On the upper shelves, covered by a glass case, rows of seal plushies were decorated in different outfits. Some of them were using a hat, a shoulder bag, so many kinds of T-shirts and accessories. They were unbelievably cute, and Daniel noticed the three moles on their cheeks—the same moles Seongwoo Hyung had.

 

“Ah, _gwiyeowo_ ~” Daniel blurted his inner thought, seemed to admired the dolls, “You collected these dolls, Hyung?”

 

“Un,” Seongwoo nodded, “Fans gave them to me. They called Ongseals. The maker made them based on my image.”

 

“They are so cute…!” Daniel smiled. _In my opinion you’re more like a black cat rather than a white seal though, Hyung?_ His own thought startled Daniel immediately. _Wait, a black cat…?_ Behind the pantry bar, the oblivious Seongwoo laughed. “You know, you used to complained about them. Since the two of us shared a room before, you protested that the seal dolls invaded our available spaces as my collection grew massive—they took almost any space available, especially on my bed. That why I ended—“

 

He almost blurted out his continuation: _ended up sleeping with you on the lower bunk bed instead of mine_. Seongwoo coughed and poured the coffee from the french press to a white mug with random cats pattern scattered on its surface. “…I ended up keep them in another storage.” He lied, but Daniel didn’t know about it. 

 

The younger seemed confused with something though, and Seongwoo was afraid that the younger male recognized the lie he just told. He did paused for a while, and his tone of voice went weird. Seongwoo quickly opened his fridge and took out a carton of milk. He poured the white liquid to the mug, followed by two blocks of sugar, then stirred it before he gave the mug to Daniel.

 

“Here,” Seongwoo was faking his smile, nervous that his facade will crumble at any given moment, “Your coffee, Niel-ah.”

 

Daniel accepted the mug and took a sip—the taste was awfully familiar, just the way he liked his coffee. The coffee was made from good coffee beans and extremely fragrant, the milk and the sugar balanced the bitterness and ended with a really nice, smooth aftertaste. “Is this how I take my coffee…?” He asked, and Seongwoo froze in response. “Ah,” The older male stuttered for a bit, “Yeah. Sorry I didn’t ask. I automatically made it by habit…”

 

“It’s okay, Hyung…!” Daniel grinned, “Actually I’m happy that we are close enough that you actually know my coffee preference.”

 

_Close enough…?_ Seongwoo almost winced when he heard the remark, but he gritted his teeth and faked another smile. His heart was still tinged with regret, as he loathed the whole pretense. _You are the one whom kept the secret from him, Ong Seongwoo_ , he told himself. It was harder than what he imagined before—the more he dwelled in the secrecy, the more he blamed himself. 

 

The younger male noticed the dim expression on Seongwoo’s face, but he didn’t probe the latter about it. He did realize that sometimes, during their conversation, Seongwoo Hyung will lost in his own thought, looked pained, stammered a bit before he tried to change the topic of their conversation. The raven haired didn’t realize this behaviour of his, and Daniel wondered if his saying or actions were the cause of Seongwoo’s attitude towards him. 

 

“May I take a look on your apartment, Hyung?” Daniel asked him, and Seongwoo snapped from his daze. “Sure,” The Fantagio’s actor replied a little bit too fast, as if he was relief with something, “I didn’t have anything interesting, though.”

 

Daniel followed Seongwoo around the apartment. It was quite a short tour as there weren’t much room to explore in the beginning. Else than clothes and other wardrobe stuffs, Seongwoo’s personal belongings were limited in number. Daniel noticed the framed photos on the shelves—There’s some photos of Seongwoo’s family, another with her older sister, some of them were taken as WANNA ONE member along with the other boys, another with Jisung in the middle, another with the two of them grinning to the camera while holding a ramyeon bowl each, and there’s one with Daniel’s mother. She was smiling happily as Seongwoo hugged her shoulders affectionately, her eyes crinkled in the same way Daniel’s eyes did. Daniel stood beside her mother, his long arms wrapped around both of his mother’s and Seongwoo’s shoulders.

 

“My mom really likes you, Hyung.” Daniel commented, “She must be your huge fan.”

 

He said the remark to broke the ice; but instead of replying, Seongwoo seemed nerveous. “Did you talk with her about it…?” He haven’t say anything to _Eomma_ after the incident. He did tell her about his busy schedule due the drama, and once in a while _Eomma_ would send him a reminder to eat and take a rest.Unlike what he pleaded to another WANNA ONE’s members, he had no courage to plead _Eomma_ the same request. She is Daniel’s mother after all, and she loves him dearly. She treasured both of them, and Seongwoo didn’t want to make _Eomma_ sad with his selfish request. He do acknowledged that his request must seemed as weird and selfish from another person’s point of view, but he need it as the confirmation of their relationship. 

 

Daniel’s amnesia gave their love relationship a reset button—a blank slate, as John Locke explained in his tabula rasa theory. It was an unfair test from Seongwoo’s side—he wanted to see if there will be a change of heart when Daniel knew nothing about their past. He promised himself that if Daniel didn’t want him as a lover due the memory loss, he will let Daniel go and move on with his life. The younger male would have a new chance of finding another love interest, a new happiness, a new chance of happy family with promising future. Even if those future won’t involve Seongwoo in it. 

 

_It’s okay. It will be okay._

 

On the other hand, Daniel was confused with Seongwoo’s reaction when he mentioned his mom. But he held back his questions and answered Seongwoo’s question instead, “We do talk. She keep asking me for your pictures, told me to send her a photo of us both. She said it was unfair of me monopolized you for myself.” Daniel waved his smartphone in front of Seongwoo, “So let’s take some selfies, Hyung.”

 

The selfie part was a lie as his mother never asked for it, but the childish side of Daniel took the opportunity for himself. He wanted a picture with his Hyung, and the selfie gave him excuses to posed with the older male. He positioned his camera, and Seongwoo obliged without any fuss—smiled to the camera. Daniel wrapped his arm on Seongwoo’s shoulder, and be able to hear Seongwoo’s faint gasp as the older male’s breath hitched, but he tightened his embrace and pulled Seongwoo closer. “3… 2…” He started the countdown, and Seongwoo flashed his brightest smile and Daniel pushed the camera button. They looked intimate and happy on the photo result, and Daniel sent the picture to his mom right away.

 

It was an awkward silence a moment later when the two of them didn’t know what to say for each other. Daniel hurriedly took his empty mug and went to the sink, “I’ll wash this.” Before Seongwoo objected, he took the sponge and washed his mug. The liquid detergent smelled nice, with citrusy smell. Seongwoo seemed to dry his dishes right away as he took the napkin from the counter, so Daniel snatched the napkin from Seongwoo, ignored Seongwoo’s “Yah!” and wiped it clean. 

 

“Where should I store this, Hyung?” He asked, eventhough he saw which cupboard Seongwoo took the mug from earlier. He just need so keep their conversation alive. At this point, Seongwoo gave up and pointed the cupboard, “The second one from the left.”

 

Most of the cupboards got a small glass window on the frame door. Daniel noticed that his Hyung owned particular dish in a set of two; some plates and bowls and utensils were a set—the pattern made them different from the other mix-matched dishwares. He was using one of the paired mug—the other mug was black with random cats pattern. 

 

There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach. _Did Seongwoo Hyung have a lover already…?_ The thought made him restless. He couldn’t help himself imagining Seongwoo smiled and took another person’s hands. He imagined his Hyung cuddled and kiss his mysterious lover, and anger pooled inside him.

 

“Niel?” Seongwoo seemed concerned, “Are you okay?”

 

“I need to go to the toilet,” Daniel replied, and Seongwoo seemed like he didn’t buy into the idea. But he still pointed on the door near the bedroom, “That way.” Daniel nodded and dashed into the bathroom. It was dominated with black and white tiles, the pattern was clean and stylish. The basin on the bathroom counter seemed chic as it was paved from natural stone, contrasted with the thick glass surface of the counter. There were some golden hued backlights from the cabinet, and Daniel opened the mirror flap with trembling hands. 

 

Inside the cabinet, there’s a bottle of shaving cream, the aftershave, hair gel tube, hair wax in a tin, back ups for toothpaste and soaps, a bottle of face spray, and the other knick-knacks. What piqued Daniel’s interest was the small cup with two toothbrushes inside. From the bristles, both looked like they were well-used. Then, Daniel noticed two different bottle of shampoo on the shower rack. One of them was purple shampoo, the one specialized for coloured hair. The bottle was light as it was almost empty, and the sharp pain sensation stabbed Daniel’s heart repeatedly. His Seongwoo Hyung’s hair was black, and he obviously wasn’t the owner of the shampoo. Purple shampoo was used by blonde or light-brunette haired, and from the pictures he collected, Daniel knew that Seongwoo Hyung’s hair was either raven or dark brunette—the brown colour never last more than a month.

 

Daniel’s heart sank even further. His mouth went dry. _Seongwoo Hyung… had a lover? They seemed close as the amenities indicated that the ‘lover’ must visit and spend the night often._ The tight sensation squeezed his heart again, and Daniel winced. _If I insisted to stay… will I meet that person today? Will that person come today for a visit? Or maybe Seongwoo Hyung told them not to come. And it passed midnight—_

 

“Daniel? Are you okay?” Seongwoo called him as he knocked on the door. Daniel opened the faucet and splashed some water on his face. “Yeah,” He replied, his voice croacked, “I’m alright.” He wasn’t, but he couldn’t say it to Seongwoo. He opened the door, and Seongwoo was there—waiting for him. There was concerns on the older male’s face. “You looked pale,” Seongwoo took a new small towel from the folded pile, gently wiped Daniel’s face, “Tell me if you felt any discomfort or anything. The doctors warned you not to overwork yourself, didn’t them?”

 

Daniel’s breath hitched as Seongwoo’s fingertips touched his skin. He swore that he felt an electric shock; the sensation spread like fire on his nerves. For a split second, he felt a really strong deja vu feelings—Seongwoo stood in front of him, saying something as he dried Daniel’s face and hair, just like this moment. Daniel blinked, _…is it… his lost memory?_

 

“Niel….?” Seongwoo called his name again. Daniel gazed upon his Hyung’s handsome face in return. Seongwoo’s sharp face features was really attractive, yet it was his obsidian eyes that stole Daniel’s attention the most. The pair of twin orbs gleamed under the light, sparkled as he spoke—breathtakingly beautiful and emitting a powerful lure of nostalagia. Daniel felt a longing feeling for those eyes: _I want you to only see me._

“Hyung,” He leaned in and tilted his head, giving the latter his adorable puppy look face, “May I spend the night here…?”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....okay how many of you guys screamed on the cliffhanger? LOLZ  
>  /bricked


	6. But you didn’t remember about us, Niel-ah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the other hand, the older male froze as he lost his chance to stop Daniel’s swift action.  
> The MMO idol threw his shirt to the side, flexed his body a bit, then lazily unbuttoned his jeans—those nimble fingers moved to popped the brandished metal button from its hole before steadily pulled the zipper down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya my lovelies~!! It's Monday morning and that means another update~~ :D  
> This chapter was longer than the previous ones, and I do hope you enjoy the 'ride'~ LOLZ
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. I'll rate up this series rating on the next chapter into 'Mature' coz *cough*smutt*cough*  
> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

* * *

 

 

_“May I spend the night here…?”_

 

Seongwoo was taken aback by Daniel’s sudden request. Of course, it wasn’t a outrageous request. It was already passed midnight and he was the one whom invited Daniel to his place. To send the latter off in such hours, would be quite a hassle. He didn’t know if Daniel’s bodyguards were still waiting downstairs or not, but his chauffeur had left earlier. 

 

“Hyung?” Daniel called him again, and Seongwoo tried his best not to sigh. “What’s your schedule for tomorrow, Niel-ah?”

 

“My hospital’s appointment was on eleven,” The younger replied, “And you got another shooting on nine, didn’t you Hyung? Jihyo Noona said so.”

 

_Aish, this manager of his…_ Seongwoo felt helpless. He was sure that their managers had arranged for them to leave together tomorrow. It was most likely that they will drop him on the shooting’s location before ushered Daniel to the hospital for his check-up. Similar arrangements had been made before; and since their staffs—except for Daniel and Jisung’s manager—didn’t know much about Daniel’s amnesia, they acted according to the previous habits.

 

Daniel had left his own articles of clothing on Seongwoo’s place. As he often visit and spend the night, there’s one section on Seongwoo’s wardrobe filled with Daniel clothes: shirts, dress shirt, jackets, sweaters, pyjamas, even underwear. Without much thought, out of habit, Seongwoo opened the wardrobe’s drawer and pulled out a set of Daniel’s Spring Home’s pyjamas and a clean, folded brief. “Here.”

 

Daniel took the clothes, but stared confusedly on the set on his hands and asked, “This—?” He unfolded the pyjamas, and clearly it wasn’t Seongwoo’s. The size was way bigger, so it must belongs to someone else. The fabric wasn’t new, it appeared to had been worn several times before.

 

_Ah._ Seongwoo cursed himself. He was careless. His mind became blank, but he forced himself to find any logical excuse. “It was yours,” He blurted, “You lend it to me before, when I visit the MMO dorm. I took it home for a wash and forgot to give it back.”

 

The excuse contained so many loopholes, and Daniel clearly see the stuffs on the drawer—from Seongwoo’s explanation it seemed that those stuffs were his instead of Seongwoo’s. It was unnatural to have so many of his clothes on Seongwoo’s wardrobe if they got no intimate relationship; but before Daniel even opened his mouth to ask, Seongwoo quickly added. “Sorry, during our WANNA ONE era we often lend stuffs to each other. Somehow it became a habit and I haven’t get any chance to give them back.”

 

The hope on Daniel’s chest crushed cruelly, but he didn’t say anything. Seongwoo Hyung’s behaviour was somewhat suspicious, but he didn’t want to deliberately make the older male uncomfortable with his pestering. 

 

“I’ll change then,” he said. Seconds later he put the pyjamas set on Seongwoo’s bed and suddenly proceed to undressed himself. Daniel pulled his shirt through his head—his wide back and toned stomach muscles in full display. On the other hand, the older male froze as he lost his chance to stop Daniel’s swift action. The MMO idol threw his shirt to the side, flexed his body a bit, then lazily unbuttoned his jeans—those nimble fingers moved to popped the brandished metal button from its hole before steadily pulled the zipper down. 

 

Seongwoo’s mind reminded him to look away, but he couldn’t peeled off his eyes from the sight. Daniel pulled his ankles from the jeans, his leg muscles were clearly displayed—especially the ones on his thigh area. 

 

Wearing a pyjamas supposed to be a simple and mundane things, but Daniel’s gesture made it looked erotic and sensual. Those fingers fiddled with the buttons as he put the top on, then he finally pulled up the pants. 

 

“I’m done,” Daniel said with a smile, beamed like a toddler successfully wore his pyjamas for the first time. Seongwoo blinked, gulped as he tried not to choke on his own saliva, “I…see.”

 

Everything felt like a blur to Seongwoo. He remembered that he replied yes when Daniel asked him if he could use one of the new, unused brush from the cabinet’s stocks. Daniel entered the bedroom smelled faintly like coconut—the same w.dressroom clear perfume he used to wear. He smelled clean and fresh, with a hint of nostalgic summer. 

 

Suddenly Seongwoo wondered of all of this was one big, cruel joke. Maybe Daniel never lost his memory. Jisung and Daniel must tricked him. The doctors and the hospital helped them to trick him. Daniel looked so… right. He looked like he belonged on Seongwoo’s apartment, naturally spent the night like hundreds of nights before. Daniel’s focus shifted onto him, and those dark pupils stared straight to Seongwoo. “Hyung,” He called, and the honorific stabbed Seongwoo’s heart so painfully, “Is it okay… to share your bed?”

 

Daniel gestured to Seongwoo’s king-sized bed. It was huge and the two of them could sleep there comfortably. Seongwoo remembered Daniel’s plea to order the Queen-sized bed instead—just because it got the same 203 cm in length as the King’s size but got a narrower width of 153 cm instead of King’s 183 cm. _“So we could cuddle closer,”_ He whispered before. But in the end they got the King Size since the mattress type they wanted was only available in King size. The two of them had spent so many nights together on the bed, tangled between the sheets—passionately intoxicated to each other. 

 

_But you didn’t remember about us, Niel-ah._

 

“Hyung…?”

 

“Sure, Niel-ah,” He replied—plastered his actor’s professional smile on his face, “It’s big enough for the two of us.”

 

It was easier said than done. Seongwoo climbed onto his bed, and Daniel followed suit. Daniel’s scent trailed to Seongwoo’s senses—the latter’s body warmth radiated onto him, the weight of the younger male shifted on the mattress beside him felt way too familiar to be ignored. On the other hand, Daniel was overwhelmed with everything: the pillow and the room were filled with Seongwoo’s scent. The scent, mixed with the room’s reed diffuser soft scents, somehow tickled his memories; deja vu sensation washed him over and over, but foreign on the same time.

 

Seongwoo turned his back to Daniel, have no courage to see the latter’s face. He tried to regulate his breath, pretended to be asleep. In reality, his heatbeats were wild and loud, drummed against his ribcages. He could felt Daniel’s gaze upon his back, intense and longing, yet silence and enduring.

 

The younger male stared on Seongwoo’s back beside him—the white nape and the curves of his body were enticing. Daniel resisted the urge to reach out and trace his fingertips on the latter’s skin. There was this urge, to pull Seongwoo closer and spooned him in his cradle—and Daniel suppressed it with all his might.

 

_No. Behave. Behave, myself._

 

The huge analog clock on the wall ticked along every passing second, and the soft _tick tick tick_ sound filled the silence along with the awkward sound of their breaths. The bed was soft and the blanket was warm, but they were restless and unable to sleep. The two of them keep playing pretend, deliberately acted asleep eventhough their eyes were wide awake. 

 

Seongwoo stared onto the curtain; there were gaps between the blinds and he could see the city lights sparkled on the horizon. They looked like dotted, tiny gems gleamed against the dark navy background of the night. It tooks time, but his eyelids finally felt heavy. He closed his eyes and pushed away all the unnecessary thoughts. _Just sleep_ , he told himself.

 

Beside him, Daniel told himself the same thing. He wanted to change his position, but didn’t dare to do so. He afraid to wake Seongwoo up, to disturb the latter’s serene slumber. He wasn’t sure if Seongwoo was a light sleeper or not, so he stayed still and stared on the latter’s silhouette instead. _Just sleep, myself,_ he warned himself, _Don’t do anything stupid. Just sleep._

 

It was a funny fact, but your body do own its own memories. Just as the two of them finally asleep, their bodies acted instinctively and moved closer to each other. Like clockworks, Seongwoo turned around and snuggled closer—Daniel put one of his arms around him and pulled the latter into his embrace. Seongwoo’s face was inches apart from Daniel’s neck, and after a whiff of a familiar odor, the older male scooted even closer. His temples pressed against Daniel’s jaw, and the younger male mumbled the raven haired’s name in his sleep. 

 

They maintained the intimate position until dawn. It was Seongwoo whom opened his eyes first. Disoriented as he was just waking up, it took a while for him to realize their position. He blinked for a few times, still in daze—Daniel’s sleeping face looked peaceful and those luscious lips was slightly opened. Seongwoo scooted closer and proceed to kiss a soft peck on Daniel’s lips when he suddenly remembered about Daniel’s amnesia and last night’s ordeal.

 

Gasped, Seongwoo retreated. He shifted into a sitting position, examined the MMO idol carefully—Daniel seemed to asleep, completely unaware about the kiss. Slightly trembled, Seongwoo covered his own face with his palms. _Pull yourself together_ , he told himself, _Don’t do another stupid slip. You are the one who wanted to keep all of these a secret._

 

The raven haired took a long sigh, then opened the thick blanket from his side of the bed and quietly slipped off. He acted carefully as their legs were slightly tangled, but after a while he was able to free himself without waking the younger male up.

 

Minutes later, it was the delicious scent from the kitchen that woke Daniel up. His nose twitched once, then twice. His stomach rumbled in response. Daniel rubbed his heavy eyelids, then yawned and stretched himself. He found that the other side of the bed was already empty, but he could hear the noises from the kitchen.

 

Daniel yawned again as he staggered to the kitchen. He wasn’t fully awake. Coffee were still dripping from the machine on the counter, and he couldn’t wait to sip a whole cup of it. In front of the waffle maker, Seongwoo was whisking a bowl filled with beaten eggs, milk, salt, pepper, and a dash of oregano. He opened the waffle maker, scooped out the hashbrowns bits he put earlier to the plates, then sprayed another coat of oil to the pan before pouring the egg mixture to the machine and closed the lid. Out of habit, he was humming—today’s piece is the melodious tone from his latest solo song.

 

The serene view was awfully domestic and there was a swelling feeling inside Daniel’s chest. Out of instinct, he approached the older male and hugged him from behind—wrapped his arms around Seongwoo’s shoulder and torso as he burried his face on the latter’s neck, huskily mumbled, “Morning…”

 

As Seongwoo was letting his guard down, he made another slip. He laughed, playfully pecked on the younger’s arm that circled his shoulder, then caressed Daniel’s hair using his free hand and ruffled it teasingly. “Morning, Babe—“ Then as he stole a glance only to found Daniel’s surprised expression, Seongwoo froze. He escaped from Daniel’s embrace, awkwardly lowered his gaze to the waffle machine. The empty egg-stained bowl on his hand almost plopped down to the floor, but he managed to tighten his grip and put it on the sink.

 

“Sorry—“ He stammered, guilt filled his voice, “I… I… mistook you for… someone else.”

 

It was totally a lie, of course. But since Daniel got this theory of ‘Seongwoo Hyung’s secret lover’ he did believe that Seongwoo mistook him for his lover. There’s a painful pang on his heart, but Daniel faked his smile and coughed,”It’s okay, Hyung.” His voice felt weird, but Seongwoo didn’t comment on it. 

 

The waffle machine beeped again, and Seongwoo thanked the timing. He sliced the omelette into two, then placed each of it to their respective plates. He put some cherry tomatoes along with the typical breakfast, then shoved one of the plates to Daniel.

 

“Let’s eat the breakfast,” He said. Daniel took the plate from Seongwoo, slowly nodded, “Okay.”

 

* * *

 

 

**[News] Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo Was Spotted by Fans on The Famous Chain Coffee Store**

It was around 08.35 AM when the two former member of WANNA ONE spotted ordering their coffee on Starbucks. The particular chain was known to located near Summer Constellation’s drama set. Many fans rejoiced for the sight since it implied that they spend the night together after  **Kang Daniel visited Ong Seongwoo on his drama set** and later on  **spotted eating dinner together** . 

 

**SEE MORE: Ong Seongwoo was praised for his potrayal as Kim Tae Woo**

 

[pics] [pics]

 

Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo were wearing a matching white button up dressed shirt and Eider’s summer coat in different set of colours. Kang Daniel’s bodyguards could be seen on the background, and  **they headed to Ong Seongwoo’s drama set location** soon after. Many fans speculated if Kang Daniel will appeared on the drama as a cameo.

 

—

 

**@Slave4OngNiel**

[pics] [pics]

OMG LOOK AT THAT THEY MUST SPEND THE NIGHT TOGETHER!! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**via twitter**

 

**@pinkpeachnielie**

[pics]

Looking good! AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT DANIEL’S HAND ON SEONGWOO’S SHOULDER, GUYS??? 

**via twitter**

 

**@lapizlazuli97** replied to **@pinkpeachnielie**

I SCREAMED. I’VE DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN.

[excitedfangirling.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@scentofsummer**

[pics] [pics]

I WAS THERE AND I MET THEM ADFGJKLDFHKL OMG YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW I’M SHAKING WHEN I SAW THE TWO OF THEM WHISPERING TO EACH OTHER ////////

**via twitter**

 

**@pinkpeachnielie** replied to **@scentofsummer**

OMG YOU WERE THERE?? 

[shockedcat.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@scentofsummer** replied to **@pinkpeachnielie**

The store located near my residence OMG MY HEART JUST— /////// I tried my best not to disturb them, but Daniel saw me and smiled. OMG I DIED!!!! He keep chatting with Seongwoo on the way out. YOU MUST SEE THEIR GLOWING FACES!

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

 

Daniel’s van dropped him on the set’s front gate. Seongwoo opened the van’s door and conveyed his thanks to Daniel’s manager and driver. The Hyung manager nodded, “I’ve contacted Jihyo-nim. She’ll find you soon.” On the middle seat, Daniel looked like a kicked puppy and Seongwoo could see the imaginary drooping ears on the latter’s head; but he steeled his heart and waved goodbye to the younger male.

 

“Thanks for the ride,” He said. Just as he wanted to close the door, Daniel intercepted. “Hyung!” He called loudly, almost a shout. Seongwoo tilted his head, “Yeah, Niel-ah?”

 

“May I see you again later…?”

 

The melancholic tone on Daniel’s question stabbed Seongwoo’s heart. He wanted to say no, that he need time, that the two of them created enough headlines already—but the look on Daniel’s eyes made his heart soften. “Sure,” Seongwoo replied, “But please do notify me before, okay Niel-ah?”

 

In response, Daniel beamed. “I will…!”

 

* * *

 

 

The drama crew greeted Seongwoo as he entered the set. He nodded with a smile on his face. His manager, Jihyo Noona wasn’t there yet, so he could take his time to change his attire and re-read his script in his dressing room. Today’s scene was the first scene when Hae In encountered Tae Woo again after the last incident. 

 

In the beginning, just like the title mentioned, Summer’s Constellation focused on a love triangle between the female protagonist and her two respective male interest. The male lead was Seo Jun, the son of influential family. His family had caused problems to the female lead’s family. Hae In was infatuated with her perfect sunbae-nim, but didn’t have luck to get her love returned. Seo Jun didn’t notice her, moreover her family got in financial problem because Seo Jun’s family’s company. It evolved into a love-hate relationship. She despised him, but later fell in love again with him when Seo Jun came back from overseas. Hae In worked at Seo Jun’s company for revenge purpose, but the young master finally noticed her and fell in love with the hardworker Hae In. The female lead was tormented with their current situation. Seo Jun also got his own problem with his family. The drama was packed with intrigue and plot twist; Seo Jun and Hae In should be a perfect star-crossed lover—but there’s another man in their relationship.

 

If Seo Jun was the personification of Altair and Hae In was the personification of Vega, there was Kim Tae Woo, the personification of Deneb. Deneb was the middle and third star of the constellation. In the original myth, Deneb was the ‘connector’ that helped Altair and Vega to be together. Kim Tae Woo was Hae In’s childhood friends. Since childhood, he had protected Hae In from the shadows. He witnessed Hae In’s infatuation with Seo Jun. He was also the one helped Hae In and her family during the dark times. On the last years of their university life, Hae In felt truly indebted to Tae Woo. Since she knew his love for her, she accepted Tae Woo as her boyfriend, half-heartedly. 

 

Viewers sympathized with Tae Woo as he loves Hae In so much, yet the female lead was somewhat ungrateful and two-timing the pitiful second male lead. They knew Hae In didn’t mean to put Tae Woo in such devastating position, but they still scorned her for her indecisiveness. Kim Tae Woo character supposed to be a mere secondary character to add conflicts on Seo Jun and Hae In’s relationship, but Seongwoo’s potrayal of him was truly remarkable and viewers fell in love so much with him. There were even some fans that preferred Hae In to ended up with Tae Woo instead of Seo Jun. The writers of the drama were aware of the matter, thus they ended up re-write the plot to made Tae Woo appeared more. 

 

“Seongwoo-ssi…?” 

 

Seongwoo put down the script on his hand as one of the camera crew called for him. The first girl was young, seemed on her early twenties—her long hair was tied into two low pigtails, giving her an innocent and youthful vibe. Her eyes were sparkled and filled with curiousity, but she seemed hesitant to say something. The other girl whom stood behind her as petite with long bob hairstyle, secured with a white cap with their drama’s logo.

 

“Yeah?” Seongwoo assured them with a smile, he closed the script and stared on the two staffs, “May I help you?”

 

“Is it true…?” The petite one asked, bashfully. She poked the girl with the twin pigtails—the latter hushed her for urging her, but finally she asked, “Is it true that Kang Daniel-ssi will appear in our drama as a cameo…?”

 

She seemed hopeful, and Seongwoo blinked in confusion. “A cameo…?” He did a polite laugh, “Well, I didn’t know either. This is the first time I heard about this.”

 

“Oh,” They seemed disappointed with his reply. Seongwoo felt that familiar uneasy feeling creeped out again—swirled inside his chest, he tried hard to maintain his smile as he asked, “Where all the idea of cameo came from? Also, in my opinion it’s better to ask the script writer and the producer about this matter. I don’t have any saying about any cameo at all.” He wanted to say that _I’m only the second male lead_ , but he held it back.

 

The girl with the pigtails looked very guilty as she hang her head low, bowed as she beg for her impoliteness. “Ah, I’m so sorry, Seongwoo-ssi. It’s just… Kang Daniel-ssi visited our drama site yesterday and he dropped you off here this morning, so the media went crazy and many fans speculated that he might be casted as a cameo in the series.” She bowed several times, along with the petite one; then the two of them scurried out from his dressing room.

 

_…the media went crazy?_

 

The uneasiness grew huge, and Seongwoo felt like he would have a panic attack. He took a deep breathe, tried to regulate his quickening heartbeats, slowly closed his eyes as he felt his ears ring. He took his water bottle and took big gulps before he reached for his phone. His fingers trembled badly as he opened the search engine and typed Daniel’s name along with his own name.

 

Seongwoo pressed the enter button, and there was a short buffer before the latest search results came in stacks of grids on his screen: each headlines was written in sensational matter. Photos of them taken by strangers filled the images suggestions result; some are blurry and shaky but some of them were definitely HD. 

 

Him and Daniel on the street, him and Daniel on the coffee place, Daniel’s hand on his shoulder, another zoom of Daniel’s hand on his waist, photos of Daniel smiled and whispering something by his ear, photos of him laughed back—and so many photos of him looking at Daniel with longing, loving eyes; as if he was a maiden, helplessly in love. 

 

It was their moments—their private moments; but strangers took those moments and captured it into thousands and thousands of still images, shared their interactions as some news—something to talk about, to be gossiped. Those strangers speculated and created their own stories, stories that Seongwoo even never thought about.

 

He felt violated, and as his body started to shook in tremor, he felt like he was trapped again: it was like in the past before WANNA ONE got their bodyguards—they were just debuted and the hype was crazy. He was there between the seas of people, the crowd reached for him, for all the WANNA ONE members. They yelled and they shoved their cameras, flash blinding his eyes as he felt those fingers clawed onto him; tried to grasp a piece of him, like those mythological women with sharp teeth and talons that ready to devour him alive. 

 

_“Seongwoo-ya…!” Daniel looked back and fished him out. The younger male pulled Seongwoo closer, guided him to weaved to the crowd. The latter’s big frame pressed on Seongwoo back, gently pushed Seongwoo forward. “Don’t worry,” He whispered, “I’m here. Don’t panic. There’s nothing to be afraid of.” The blonde haired Daniel put his hand on Seongwoo’s shoulders, squeezed it as he begged the fans to give way so they could leave._

_“I’m here,” Daniel always said, and he was indeed always there for Seongwoo. The younger male would wait for him, shadowing him a few steps behind during those trips between schedules, especially during those airports trips. Even when there were gaps between them, but he could felt Daniel’s gaze on his back and Seongwoo felt safe. He got Daniel on his side, always._

 

Seongwoo opened his eyes, and his smartphone’s screen stared back at him. He shuddered, bit his lower lips as he curled his body into a ball—his heartbeats hammering against his ribcages, droplets of cold sweats formed on his temple, and Seongwoo felt dizzy. 

 

_But this time you aren’t here with me, Niel-ah._

 

_I pushed you away… didn’t I?_

 

 

 

* * *

 

**BONUS (COZ IT FITS THE CHAPTER)**

Thank you forever for the creator of the pic!!

I got it from my friend so if you knew the creator, pls tell me so I can give the proper credit :D

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A gentle reminder: when I labelled this series as 'slow burn' I really meant it.  
> How many of you noticed that this 6th chapter was still on the 3rd day after the incident on the 1st chapter? /teehee  
> I'll pick up the pace later :3


	7. And you are lying as well, Seongwoo-ya

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His dorm was empty and quiet.  
> While it looked amazing and posh the other day when Seongwoo took him here, at the moment it felt like an unfamiliar, foreign place. He didn’t feel that he belonged there; the urban minimalist interior seemed to mocked him. 
> 
> All of the sudden, he missed Seongwoo’s apartment: warm, inviting, cozy, filled with the older male’s scent, random knick-knacks scattered all over the places. Seongwoo’s place felt more familiar, more like a home, a place to return to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morning, lovelies!  
> It's another Monday Morning and it means a new chapter uploaded~ yeayyy~~
> 
> I just went home from a weekend Bangkok trip--if you visited my IG during the trip, I posted the IG stories on 'Bangkok Trip' highlight. I have a blast, and seriously considering if I could insert a brief something Bangkok-related to the story. After all, they did visit Bangkok for their fanmeeting and the concert as well :)) Do I have any Thai reader here?
> 
> Anyway, I named Jisung and Daniel's manager in this chapter. Seongwoo's manager got her name earlier, so our manager-nim need his own name as well. I imagined him as those bodyguard/manager whom accompanied our boys during those events & trips, playing along with the during fanmeeting, etc. Remember that famous clip of one of them helped Jisung with bubble gun and Daniel 'clawed' the other one teasingly after he failed the claw machine? I wanted them to be close and playful with the manager :))

 

* * *

 

It felt like a science fiction movie. 

The MRI pod was the latest technology and the sleek design gave it a futuristic look. Apart from the eggshell white gigantic arcs used to scan the patient’s body, there was a curved tampered glass panel covering him—the Radiologist explained that the newest feature was great on reducing the possibility of unwanted radiation. “This machine is one of a few piece in the world,” The operator bragged when the hospital staff took Daniel to the Radiology room.

 

So Daniel changed his clothes into the thin, mid-knee length hospital gown. The material is soft, but thin; and Daniel wondered if the synthetic material was meant to use just once before being discarded. The pale blue hospital gown wasn’t the most comfortable thing to wear, as he shuddered when the cold air from the central air conditioner hit his skin.

 

He lied there on the patient’s pad, the curved glass coverage made him felt like he was transported into that hi-tech pod from Ridley Scott’s Prometheus movie; the one used for the gory surgery scene when Elizabeth Shaw forced a make-shift C-section to remove the squid-like baby alien from her abdomen. It was fascinating to see how technology evolved through the years. The last time he fractured his hand, it was an standard radiology machine used to took his X-rays. But once again, maybe that was a whole different equipment—they wanted to see his bones last time, while today’s purpose was to scan his head and brain to check his condition after the accident.

 

“Daniel-ssi…?” The operator’s voice came through the built-in speaker near the machine. He immediately replied with a rather loud, “Yes…!” as he glanced over to the operating machinery area. There were another static before the operator informed him that they will scanned him in a few seconds, so he just need to relax and tried his best to stay still. He responded back, “I get it.”

 

The lights were turned on; the soft golden glow comforted him as the glass pod entered the MRI’s magnetic arcs. Daniel tried to lie there motionlessly, but his eyes wondered all over the interior of the machine. A red laser line went through his body—first a horizontal line, then a vertical one. It ended faster than he imagined; the built-in speaker gave the soft _beep_ before the operator announced that it was done. Before he could react, the patient pad extracted him from the arches, gently positioned him into his original position.

 

A male nurse helped to uncover the curved glass cover, then helped him off the machine. “The changing room was over there,” He politely showed the door—it was the same room Daniel used before to change into the hospital gown. He took off the uncomfortable gown, threw it to the medium sized tan coloured rattan bin provided, then put on his own clothes.

 

His manager accompanied him on the Doctor’s room. Daniel called him Youngsik Hyung—copying Jisung’s way of addressing the latter. Their manager was a rather burly man in his late 30s—despite his tough looking appearance, he was a soft-hearted man. He offered Daniel a pet bottle of oolong tea; Daniel could see his and Jisung’s face on the packaging, giving a cheerful thumbsup.

 

“Thanks,” He twisted the cap open and emptied half of the bottle in several big gulps. They need to wait for the results, and those minutes felt awfully boring. Daniel fiddled with his phone, opened the LINE chat message and send Seongwoo a message.

 

_Hey Hyung_

_Just finished my MRI_

_How’s there?_

_I hope you’ll do a good performance today_

_Good luck with the takes~!_

 

Daniel send another sticker emoticon of a big, fluffy samoyed dog beaming hearts to the screen. His messages were sent, but the _read_ notification wasn’t popped up yet. _Seongwoo Hyung must be shooting his part already_ , he thought. The older male always turned off his phone during his takes to concentrate better. Daniel want to send more messages to Seongwoo, but he held himself. It was no good to spam the chat, so he close the tab and opened his gallery. He scrolled his photos again—his thumb hovered on the password locked folder. The black cat emoticon looked as if it winked at him teasingly: _You cannot open me without the password, Boy._

 

He tried several combinations, but nothing works. Daniel sighed, then opened his camera folder. His recent selfie with Seongwoo was there, smiles on their face. They looked so comfortable with each other. Seongwoo looked especially good looking there; the soft light hit his skin gently, giving him a glowing appearance. His sharp features casted an eye-catching shadow to the sides of his face.

 

Daniel was busy with his own thoughts when the doctor opened the door and stepped in. There’s some MRI scan results on his hand—the doctor placed them side by side on the light box panelled to the wall and turn the lights on. Both Daniel and Youngsik didn’t understand anything about the scan results, but the doctor slowly explained the result in details.

 

“No injuries on the body. There’s nothing wrong with the brain. All is good. There was no haemorrhage or any internal damage,” The old doctor pointed on the first slide and made a circle motion, “The hippocampus however, was affected after the incident. That’s why you have the retrograde amnesia as the effect.”

 

“Will he be okay…?” Youngsik seemed restless, and the doctor replied, “Physically, the patient will be okay. There won’t be any disruption for any of his body function or general health. He just need to take his time and stimulate his memory. Hopefully, he would regain his memory back. But there was no guarantee. I’ve seen several cases when the patient never got their memories back. But they still have a fulfilling life after their amnesia, so as an amnesiac patient you need to be positive.”

 

“How long…” Youngsik asked again, “…it will be needed for him to get his memories back?”

 

It was the same question Daniel wanted to ask, but deep down he knew that the matter won’t have any definitive answer. There were many amnesiac plot on the drama played on the television; and they all got different plotlines: some of them regained the memories in no time, others got it back after quite a while, some need a strong stimulation, and a few never got the memories back. Eventhough television dramas were fictional and often written in hyperbolic manner, they were still a reflection that viewer wanted to relate on. So at least, on some basic, the plots were based on actual cases of amnesia.

 

The doctor paused, then sighed. “Well, unfortunately there’s no limit of time. The brain is still the biggest mystery in the medicine and science department. The patient need to rest and take the time, because there was no way of rushing it. I do recommend the patient to stimulate his memories by visiting familiar places or doing his usual activities. It might help. In many cases, interacting with the people he knew also a good way to jolt the memories back.”

 

Youngsik Hyung looked troubled, but he thanked the doctor. He helped Daniel with the hospital administration, then less than half an hour later they went to the parking lot. The concern still evidently there on Youngsik’s face, so Daniel asked him, “…what is it, Hyung?”

 

“Well,” The latter sighed, “The higher up instructed me to make you back to work immediately. You have a really packed schedule and these day offs made everything even more hectic for us in the future.” His manager frowned, “Really sorry, Daniel-ssi. I really want you to have a good rest, but the CEO was really pushing me. He gave a strict order to keep your amnesia a secret.”

 

No wonder Youngsik looked so dejected. It was harsh—and clear: his company wanted him to immediately get back to work. Amnesia or no amnesia, he got a really hectic schedule to be fulfilled and there was no time to dilly-dally. Physically he was fine, but he didn’t know about himself for the past three years. If he want to go back seamlessly to his work schedule, Daniel need to re-learn everything….fast.

 

“It’s okay, Hyung.” Daniel patted his manager’s shoulders, “I got it. But I need time to re-learn everything. I need a summary of everything, especially my latest songs along with their dance choreography.”

 

“I’ll provide the video and the details you need,” Youngsik nodded, “I’m really sorry, Daniel-ssi. I’ll help you with everything I knew. You may need help from Jisung-ssi for several details though, because there were a period of time I haven’t assigned as your manager earlier. Asking Seongwoo-ssi maybe a good option, you guys were close since the Produce 101 era. You guys often spend time together, even after WANNA ONE’s disbandment.” 

 

“…right,” Daniel nodded. _So we are close after all, Seongwoo Hyung? Is that why sometimes you looked pained? Because I lost my memories? I wonder…. If I knew your ‘mysterious’ lover, Hyung. Is it someone I knew during those three years I did’t remember? Youngsik Hyung said we often spending time together… are your lover okay with that? Or that person was someone both of us close with, that’s why we were given so much trust? Or perhaps… that person was there whenever I was there spending my time with you, Hyung…?_

 

“We still have some free time for the rest of this week. Do you want to go somewhere today?” His manager asked, and Daniel snapped from his daze. He got no plan for the rest of the day, and Jisung would need Youngsik’s assistance later as he got another schedule as a panelist on a musical variety show. Daniel hesitated. He wanted to see Seongwoo, but he remembered that the older male requested him to ask before he want to meet him again.

 

“Let me ask Seongwoo Hyung,” Daniel told Youngsik as they went inside the van. Daniel opened the LINE chat message and found out that Seongwoo haven’t read his message he sent earlier. “Should I call him…?” He pondered. After a while, he pushed the call button. The ringtone went and went on, but Seongwoo didn’t pick it up. He called again for a couple of times, but the call didn’t get connected. Daniel tried Seongwoo’s phone number next, but the automatic replying machine told him that the owner of the phone number he called was busy before asking him to leave a message.

 

“Hyung…?” Daniel awkwardly told the recording machine, “It’s me. You must be busy on the set right now… I’ve got my hospital result. Is it cool to meet afterwards? Please reply my LINE when you’re available later. See you, Seongwoo Hyung.”

 

After the call, Daniel sighed. It was an awkward silence before he raised his face to face Youngsik Hyung who sat on the driver seat. “Let’s go home,” He said. His manager nodded, proceed to move their van to the exit gate. They hit the road back to Itaewon, and Daniel stared on the tall buildings outside the car’s window. The sky was bright and briliantly blue, with some huge cumulonimbus over the horizon, yet he didn’t feel happy to see such a good weather.

 

Soon, their entered the apartment’s parking area. Daniel took his bag along with him, Youngsik Hyung opened his door and ushered him to the lift. “Do you need me to send you up?” Youngsik asked, but Daniel shook his head, “It’s okay. I can go on my own.” 

 

His manager seemed didn’t really convinced with the clearly dispirited Daniel, but he slowly nodded, “I’ll send you the data later.” Daniel mumbled some okay, then waved on Youngsik—his manager went back to the van to accompanied Jisung on his schedule. He stood there until Youngsik Hyung left, felt kinda lost as he was suddenly _alone;_ both figuratively and literally. He pushed the lift’s up button and the elevator gave a crisp _ding_ before those metal door slowly opened to the side. 

 

Daniel stepped in, remembered the instructions Seongwoo taught him before and tapped his resident card to the sensor panel. He pushed his floor’s number, and the lift started to move. It took several seconds before it stopped and with another loud _ding_ the door opened. He went to his door and punched the code.

 

His dorm was empty and quiet. While it looked amazing and posh the other day when Seongwoo took him here, at the moment it felt like an unfamiliar, foreign place. He didn’t feel that he belonged there; the urban minimalist interior seemed to mocked him. All of the sudden, he missed Seongwoo’s apartment: warm, inviting, cozy, filled with the older male’s scent, random knick-knacks scattered all over the places. Seongwoo’s place felt more familiar, more like a _home_ , a place to return to.

 

“Hhhhhhhh….” He let another sigh, then went to his own room. Daniel threw his bag to the couch, opened his wardrobe then changed his outfit with a comfy, worn out baggy T-shirt and a red sweatpants. He threw himself on the bed, felt exhausted all of the sudden. Lied on his back, Daniel took his phone again, found that Seongwoo haven’t read his message yet.

 

_I miss you already, Hyung. I want to see you…_

 

Daniel put his phone to the side, his eyelids started to feel heavy. He closed his eyes, pictured this morning’s Seongwoo once again on his mind: Seongwoo’s back against his chest, felt warm and perfectly right inside his embrace. The older male smiled and chuckled, gave soft pecks on his arm, ruffled his hair, and called him _Babe_. 

 

_I want to be the one you called ‘Babe’, Hyung… You seemed to really, really love this lover of yours—and I wished that it was me._

 

* * *

 

 

“Seongwoo, are you really okay?”

 

When Jihyo Noona found him on his dressing room, Seongwoo’s eyes were red and slightly puffy. He seemed like he was crying for hours; those bloodshot eyes were paired with a rather gloomy expression. Seongwoo convinced his manager that he was okay and his scene indeed portrayed Tae Woo in a really vunerable state. Tried to fixed his hair, Seongwoo lied, “I wanna try a new acting method, Noona. That’s all.”

 

Other people might took Seongwoo’s lie and believe it since his reason was believable enough—but not Jihyo. She knew Seongwoo’s capabilities well: the actor didn’t need to do these kind of method acting. Whenever the director said _“Action…!”_ and the slate clapped, Seongwoo could changed himself immediately into his character. He got years of training like this before; afterall Fantagio is an actor agency. They got acting classes and Seongwoo excelled on those lessons. He didn’t need to immersed himself into such raw, melancholy emotion like he did at the moment. So his actor must be lying, and it was a personal matter.

 

Jihyo wanted to ask _Is it Daniel…?_ but she didn’t want to probe more into the matter. The MMO idol stayed with Seongwoo last night, and from Youngsik’s description the two of them were fine and Daniel even asked Seongwoo if he could meet him again later. _So what’s the problem…?_

 

She sighed, “You can talk to me, you know. You’re like my lil brother already, Seongwoo-ya.”

Seongwoo paused for a moment. Those lips curled up, formed a smile that Jihyo despised so much: the professional, work-related smile looked too fake in her eyes. “Thanks,” he said, “But really… I’m okay.”

 

_No, you are not okay_ , Jihyo wanted to say—but the staff called for Seongwoo already and he entered the set. Today’s scene was focused on Tae Woo’s desperate state. He lived his life as usual, but with a hollowed, broken-hearted state. His boss and co-workers noticed the difference in his attitude, but Tae Woo insisted that he was okay.

 

“Nothing’s wrong,” Tae Woo’s lips formed a pained smile, “Everything is okay. Don’t worry about me.” His colleagues noticed his lie, but couldn’t say anything. Jihyo felt a deja vu feeling as Tae Woo’s scene was ironically mimicked Seongwoo’s in real life. “You can talk with me, Tae Woo. We care about you, you know…” Tae Woo’s office’s sunbae stared at him, eyes filled with concern. In return, Tae Woo laughed half-heartedly. “I’m really okay,” He lied.

 

Jihyo watched the director yelled the _“Cut!”_ and praised Seongwoo for his briliant potrayal of Tae Woom—and couldn’t help to think: _And you are lying as well, Seongwoo-ya._

 

* * *

 

There was a soft click when his room’s door handle turned downwards—someone pushed the wooden door gently as he stepped in; barely tip-toed so he won’t make any loud noises. There’s a pause, then that person asked in a really soft voice: “Are you sleeping, Niel-ah?”

 

Daniel wanted to reply, but he was so sleepy he couldn’t do anything beside mumbled some inaudible noises and snuggled closer to his pillow. The blanket felt so soft and warm, enveloped him like a cocoon. The other person approached him, the other side of the bed dived slightly as he sat next to Daniel’s side. There was warmth and Daniel could smell something sweet like vanilla and bergamot; the scent felt so familiar but he couldn’t remember anything about it. 

 

The scent went stronger as the stranger on his bed combed Daniel’s fringe using his fingers—those delicate touch felt comforting and filled with longing feelings. It felt surreal; Daniel was afraid to wake up as all of these moments might disappear once he opened his eyes. The other person leaned in and gave lingering pecks on his temples and cheeks, those lips felt soft against his skin.

 

Just as the person stood up to leave him, Daniel caught the latter’s wrist and pulled him into the bed—next to him. “Hey,” He croaked, voice hoarse and husky as he was just awoken. Beside him, Seongwoo smiled. “Hey,” He replied back. The older male’s face looked tired, with faint dark circles under his eyes. He was barefaced and awfully handsome, even with his current slightly pale complexion. 

 

“You looked tired,” Daniel commented. Using his thumbs, Daniel traced Seongwoo’s cheeks and scooted closer; their face were only an inch apart. “I miss you,” He confessed, and Seongwoo leaned in to snuggle. “I miss you too.” He whispered, “And you looked way more tired than I am.”

 

Daniel chuckled—the two of them stared onto each other eyes. After a second that felt like an eternity, Seongwoo leaned closer and pressed their lips together—featherly light and innocent kiss. Daniel immediately wrapped his fingers on the back of Seongwoo’s head, cradled him possessively as he deepened the kiss: he nibbled on Seongwoo’s lower lips, kneaded them passionately; and just as Seongwoo moaned and parted his lips slightly, Daniel joined their tongues together. Seongwoo let out some incoherent whispers, panted as Daniel rolled them over and half-lied atop of him. Daniel’s body weight felt solid against his own body, and by instinct he cirled his arms around Daniel’s broad shoulder and wrapped his legs around the younger male’s hips. They grind against each other, gasps and moans filled the room between wet noises of their kisses.

 

“Niel-ah…” Seongwoo’s luscious lips were swollen from their aggressive kissing, looked red and devilishly inviting. There were misty layer of lust on Seongwoo’s dark orbs, his skin flushed pink under Daniel’s touch. He rolled his hips against Daniel; both groaned as their hardened members rubbed teasingly against each other, separated only by the layers of their pants. 

 

“Niel-ah…” Seongwoo gasped again, his voice went hoarse as he pleaded, “I want you…”

 

Daniel growled and rolled his hips in response—placed one of his hand on Seongwoo’s waist as he held the latter’s neck using his other hand. “Stop…” Daniel nibbled those luscious lips hungirly, “…tempting me like… that…”

 

“Ngghh,” Seongwoo kissed him back, chasing Daniel’s lips as he hated when their kiss got interrupted, “And you… stop teasing me… I want you, Niel-ah… now…” 

 

Daniel kissed him again, whole-heartedly; hands unbuttoned rows of Seongwoo’s buttoned down shirt. He pushed the material off Seongwoo’s shoulder; then kissed the latter’s jawline, down to his neck—sucked the spot when he could feel Seongwoo’s pulse, leaving deep crimson marks there. Daniel keep leaving peppering kisses, nibbled on Seongwoo’s shoulder, teasingly bit the part. Seongwoo moaned, then slightly pushed Daniel away from him, grabbed the hem of the latter’s shirt—proceed to pull the comfy, old shirt rather forcefully through Daniel’s head. The shirts were soon thrown onto the floor, and Daniel fumbled with Seongwoo’s pants, impatiently pulled the jeans down along with the older male’s underpants. 

 

Daniel’s breath hitched—Seongwoo was ethereally beautiful, lying naked beneath him. His dark, raven coloured hair contrasted with his flawless ivory skin, rose pink hue dusted his face and neck, the twin nubs on his chest perked under Daniel’s palm. Seongwoo parted his lips again, eyes dazed, let another moan as Daniel glided his hands through the older man’s torso—leaving fiery, burning traces which amplified Seongwoo’s mewled noises. “Tease,” Seongwoo curved his back, touched Daniel’s stomach using his toes, alluringly swept upwards—before perched his leg on Daniel’s shoulder and tugged him closer, biting his own lower lip before seductively whispered: “…fill me up.”

 

Daniel sealed those lips again, locked the other male’s lips using his. He impatiently pushed his waistband down, along with his brief—the material pooled on his knees but he have no qualm to properly undress. His own member was standing between his legs, rigid and pulsating; the head was slick with precum. He palmed Seongwoo’s member, kneaded the hardened member and teased the leaking head using his thumbs. The older male trashed beneath him, gripped the sheets tightly until his knuckles turned white. 

 

“Get the lube,” Seongwoo rasped, husky and demanding, “Hurry…!”

 

Daniel opened the drawer on his bedside cabinet and pulled out the small bottle along with the last condom in the box. Daniel opened the cap and squirted a decent amount of the gel onto his palm, coated his fingers and warmed it up using his body heat for a bit before smeared them generously on Seongwoo’s tiny opening.

 

“Ah—“ The raven haired bit his lips, tried to suppress his moans as Daniel’s fingers probed on his ring of muscles. The younger male finally pushed his finger in, inch by inch. He waited until Seongwoo seemed relaxed, then added the second finger. Seongwoo’s inner wall felt tight around his fingers, and Daniel coaxed the opening to slowly accommodate the size difference. Seongwoo was getting impatient, but Daniel hushed him as he need to prepare the older male well for further intercourse.

 

“Patient,” Daniel kissed him again, “I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

 

He moved his fingers; worked them in and out, slowly scissoring the inner walls. To distract the other male, Daniel nipped on the perked nub on Seongwoo’s chest, licked it teasingly before nibbled on it, then sucked it hard. Seongwoo trashed again and arched his back, breath rasped. He whined when Daniel’s lips left his body, but soon the younger male repeated his action to the other nub. 

 

Everything started to blur; Seongwoo behaved so wantonly—the licentious act spiked Daniel’s libido even higher. The older male whined for him, repeatedly asked the younger male to bury himself deep inside his body. “Hurry up—“ Seongwoo gripped Daniel’s arm, throwing his head to the side and exposed the curve of his neck.

 

Daniel leaned in and pecked the latter’s neck—leaving more crimson marks there: trailed down to his torso. He knew that he shouldn’t leave such obvious marks on Seongwoo’s body, but seeing those shade of red contrasted on the latter’s alabaster skin created such a thrilled feeling. Those marks were his—he made it, marked Seongwoo as someone shared such intimate moment with him. Those marks were proofs of their love session, and Daniel wanted to plant more of those marks on Seongwoo.

 

_Mine. You are mine, right Seongwoo Hyung…?_

 

“Hurry, Niel-ah,” Seongwoo plead promiscuously, pulled Daniel’s face closer and pressed their forehead together. Daniel could see the beads of sweats on the latter’s temple, the older male’s skin was glistening with perspiration; fiery hot under his touch. “Claim me… make me yours…”

 

The last whisper got Daniel, hard. He impatiently fumbled on the condom; but the flimsy wrapper tore, along with the polyurethane material. “Shit,” He cursed. It was their last condom. “Sorry—“ Seongwoo took the condom from Daniel’s hand and threw it aside. He didn’t seem like he care about the protection wrapper. Those mischievous smile went wider as he whispered on Daniel’s ear, his breath felt hot and tingled the younger’s skin: “It doesn’t matter…”

 

They locked eyes, and Daniel realized what those gleam on Seongwoo’s dark orbs meant. “Are you sure…?” He asked, holding his breath as Seongwoo reached onto his member, kneaded it several times before gave it a tug, positioned the dripping head on his own entrance. Daniel had a good job preparing him, the ring of muscles were soft and ready. Seongwoo nodded, “Make me yours, Niel-ah…” 

 

Daniel pushed in—groaned as he felt Seongwoo’s inner walls welcoming his rigid member, inch by inch. It felt tight and hot, Daniel felt like he was ready to melt; his chest were filled with euphoric feeling: desire, love, adoration, longing towards the male beneath him. Daniel rolled his hips, shallowly pounding Seongwoo as he pushed himself further and further, before finally buried himself to the hilt. Seongwoo’s breath hitched and he let a loud, long moan out. “Aaah, why you are so big, Niel-ah…” 

 

He kissed the older male, peppering the latter’s face with kisses. Whispering sweet nothing endlessly to Seongwoo’s ear, though he meant every words he said. The Fantagio member’s body felt lax after a while, finally accustomed being so stretched up and filled with the younger’s manhood.

 

“Move,” He ordered, and Daniel complied. He did slow, deep thrusts that sent chills to Seongwoo’s spine. As the moans get louder, Daniel started to pound the older male harder and harder. Incoherent ramblings escaped Seongwoo’s lips, filled the room along with heavy scent of sex. Daniel’s pride swelled as he saw Seongwoo’s expression—possessively he cradled the latter’s lower torso and plowed repeatedly, in more aggressive tempo. Seongwoo’s body spasmed and writhed beneath him, coaxed him to continue his action, demanded him to do it faster and harder.

 

“More—!” 

 

Seongwoo’s debauched look was totally ravishing, and Daniel wanted to give in to every order the older male gave him. Those raven locks fell on his forehead, so Daniel combed it away and kissed the moist skin. Seongwoo smelled like musk and cedar and bergamot, with a hint of sandalwood. He smelled so good; so familiar, and Daniel felt that he supposed to recognize the scent.

 

“I love you,” He mouthed on the latter’s lips—Seongwoo’s lips had turned puffy and swollen, his skin flushed into even darker shade of pink. Their skin slicked against each other, created constant wet noises that rivalled the slapping noise from the point where their bodies joined. It felt sacral, and yet primitive. Both of the succumbed into their instincts: to give the ultimate pleasure to their partner.

 

“I— I’m close…” Breathless, Seongwoo’s toes curled as the over-sensory sensation washed him over and over. The younger’s rigid member keep pounding his sweet spot in every thrust, and it was unbearably euphoric. He tightened his legs on Daniel’s hips, back curved into a beautiful arch as he let out another gasps. 

 

It was Seongwoo who firstly reached the peak. Just as Daniel reached down to touch his member,he came. His stomach tightened and his body spasmed uncontrollably under the younger male’s body. The milky white fluid stained his stomach, trapped between their bodies. As orgasm drowned him with a great deal of pleasure, his inner walls clenched hard onto Daniel’s pulsating member and the younger soon followed suit. 

 

“Nghhh…!” Daniel finally let his seed out, filled Seongwoo’s pleasure canal. He thrusted his hips over and over to Seongwoo’s sensitive body as he released his fluids in several big pumps. They stayed on the position for a while, felt boneless and breathless. Daniel tried his best not to slump atop Seongwoo’s lithe body; pecked the latter’s forehead, cheeks and the tip of the nose before claimed those luscious lips once again.

 

When Daniel finally pulled out, he could felt his release trickled down from Seongwoo’s body, dripped onto the latter’s inner thigh before stained the sheet beneath them. Seongwoo gave him a lazy, dazed smile. Daniel felt like crying. 

 

_Mine._

_You are mine._

 

“I love you Hyung…” He whispered, but Seongwoo didn’t reply. Daniel felt something amiss. Carefully he called the latter again, “Hyung…?”

 

_…Hyung?_

 

_Hyung…?_

 

* * *

 

 

It was twilight when Daniel awoken from his deep slumber. The sky had turned navy blue with barely any traces of crimson hue from the sunset. Despite the air conditioner, he was drenched in sweat. 

 

_Wait._

 

He was alone. There wasn’t anyone else in his room. There was no Seongwoo Hyung, or any traces of their love making. Daniel blinked for a couple of times, his muddled head slowly getting clear. The second later, he threw his blanket aside and checked his pants.

 

“Ah… shit,” He cursed, embarrassed to find that he had spoiled his underwear and sweatpants with cums. He never experience these kind of wet dreams since his puberty years ago. It felt so real; the dream he had—and Daniel felt guilty about it. Seongwoo Hyung was totally indecent and lascivious in his dream, and Daniel wondered if his raging hormones fantasized the older male in such impure, lewd state.

 

“Kang Daniel, you are so useless…!” He scolded himself, then hurriedly went to the bathroom. He tried to remember how to wash the stain from the fabric. He did his best, and double checked if there were any traces that could be used as evidence later. Found none, satisfiedly he entered the shower and cranked the water into the max. He let the hot water washed his body, cleaned himself with the bodywash. He reached for the shampoo next, and felt the sharp stabbing pain again when he recognized that he was using the same shampoo brand with Seongwoo’s mysterious lover.

 

“Can’t it be me, Hyung…?”

 

Minutes later, he went out from the bathroom. Daniel threw his pants onto the washing machine, then went back to his bedroom. He plopped himself to the bed, looking for his smartphone as he let the towel hanged atop his wet, dripping hair. Unbothered to wear any shirt at the moment, he sat cross-legged topless in his boxer brief, opened the chat app and found that Seongwoo haven’t read his messages.

 

Wait, Seongwoo supposedly finished his shootings hours ago. At least, that was Jihyo Noona told him before when he asked for Seongwoo’s schedule. It was the reason Daniel boldly asked the older male if they could meet again later. 

 

… _did I make a mistake, Hyung?_

_Am I overthinking this matter… or you really avoided me…?_

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....okay, how many of you screamed on the last part? *run away*
> 
> I'm picking up the pace for 8th chapter and beyond.  
> FYI if you're noticing, the 7th (and upcoming 8th) was still happened on the 3rd day. My friends nagged me about this matter already LOLZ Btw if you're frustated with Seongwoo, he'll get better in the future chaps. Chapter 8 will focused on these matter, so stay tuned for next week~~!!
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. Radiology room is still kinda scary whenever I went to one LOLZ  
> Especially the warning sign 'BEWARE RADIATION' on their door XDXD I did twice--for my knee (after a hit and run accident, I mentioned this once on my previous fic <https://archiveofourown.org/works/11596086>) and earlier this month for my teeth panoramic photo, since I need to remove my wisdom teeth XDXD
> 
>    
> \-------------------------------------------  
> While waiting for the update next week, have you guys read my [I Love You to the Moon and Back (to Infinity and Beyond, Forever and Ever)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13959222) yet? I also made a fanvideo for that fic :D  
> or if you want another smutty one, please check [ I Fall In Love With You (Over and Over Again)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12493280) /wink


	8. So you don’t want me, then?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Whenever you ready_ , Daniel said.
> 
> And Seongwoo had kept him waiting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morning, lovelies~!!  
> It's another Monday Morning, so say hello to the newest chapter as usual :D
> 
> A small reminder just in case you guys need a lil bit info on the timeline: the 8th chapter was still on the 3rd day after the 1st chapter.  
> The pace will be quicker from this chapter though :))

* * *

 

The first call wasn’t connected.

As well on the second, third, and fourth call. He tried to call Seongwoo both via the chat app and the phone number, both won’t went through. After being connected to the voicemail for the second time, Daniel felt so dejected. He didn’t know if Seongwoo Hyung forgot to turn on his phone after the shoot and maybe resting at the moment… or the older male thought him as a nuisance and did avoid him because he showed up uninvitedly to the drama location before.

 

_But even Youngsik Hyung said that we often hang out together… so…why…? You can at least read and reply my messages right, Hyung?_

 

It was kinda late, but Daniel thought that it might be a better idea to call Jihyo Noona rather than guessing any possible scenarios in his tortured brain. His call was connected right after the second ring, “Yeah, Daniel-ssi?”

 

“Noona,” He was relieved to find his call got accepted right away, “Are you with Seongwoo Hyung at the moment? Can I speak with him?”

 

“…Seongwoo…?” Jihyo Noona seemed confused, “The shooting ended around two hour ago and he supposedly at home at the moment. I dropped him on his door around one hour ago.”

 

“Oh,” Daniel didn’t know what to say, “Maybe he’s resting at the moment. I’ll contact him later then. Thanks for your information, Jihyo Noona.”

 

“You’re welcome, Daniel-ssi,” Jihyo wanted to tell him that Seongwoo acted rather peculiar today and she didn’t believe all his excuses, but she didn’t think that it was a good idea to tell the latter. Maybe they have a fight… that’s why Seongwoo ignored the messages Daniel sent him. Jihyo had seen the push notifications when she handed the smartphone earlier: the MMO idol sent Seongwoo strings of messages and several phone calls. When she reminded Seongwoo about it, her artist looked really bothered and told her that he will check the notifications later.

 

While Jihyo wondered about Seongwoo’s odd behaviour, Daniel was even more confused with the whole situation. He didn’t know if he did something that offend the older male. He tried to reassure himself that he might be overthinking and over-analyzed the whole situation, but his gut feeling told him that there was something amiss—and he need to do something about it.

 

He tapped his fingers onto his smartphone, opened the contact list, then called Jisung. After a few ringtones, the older male picked up his call. “Yeah, Niel-ah?” Jisung’s voice tone reminded him of his own mother back in Busan, and Daniel made a mental note to phone his mother right after his call with Jisung, “Jisung Hyung—“ 

 

He hesitated for a second there, but he asked his question anyway, “Do you have other contact numbers or any possible chat option for Seongwoo Hyung…?” On the other line, Jisung sounded kinda unsure, “…elaborate that.”

 

“Well,” Daniel tried his best to summarized the situation, “I just… couldn’t get through. I chatted him and called his phone number, called his ID via the chat apps, every way possible—but none of them went through. He haven’t read any of my messages and my call always re-directed to the voicemail. I mean—I’m kinda freaking out….”

 

“Niel—“

 

“Yeah I know that it was barely an hour after he went home and maybe he’s resting at the moment so he hadn’t check his phone; rough day and all—but… Um, I kinda hope that at least he read my messages and reply one or a few things?” Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose, “Jisung Hyung, sorry. I know I was rambling—“

 

“Niel? Breathe—“

 

“I did—I do…” Daniel paced himself, “Mmm, it might sounded weird but… the ones knew about my amnesia were basically you, Seongwoo Hyung and Youngsik Hyung. Yeah, and the doctors as well plus the higher ups on our company—but they didn’t really count in my case. It… it kinda scary, Hyung. I didn’t remember so many things and I don’t wanna be whinny, so I told myself I need to calm down and sort things out and try to re-learn everything that I could. But I couldn’t even access my own laptop—moreover I didn’t remember most of my songs and choreographies and those shows I need to attend… Basically all of these was kinda overwhelming and I need Seongwoo Hyung—“

 

He stopped. Jisung, whom patiently listened to Daniel’s rambling urged him to elaborate further, “You need Seongwoo, because…?”

 

“I don’t know,” Daniel sighed, “But I just felt that way. Being with him… made me feel something? Like there was some kind of familiar, deja vu sensation whenever I’m with him and I desperately longing for it. It was different with you, no offense Hyung, but I do remember you somehow and you gave me reassurance in your own way. That I’m not alone and you’ll support me no matter what coz you care for me—I do know that. With Seongwoo Hyung though… it was different.”

 

Jisung paused for a second, “Go on.”

 

“Um,” Daniel finally plopped himself to the chair next to his bed, “There was something that drawn me into him. I mean, yeah it’s just the third day after I woke up at the hospital and I didn’t remember him at all—but I felt like… he’s someone special. Deep down, I believe that we got… somekind of bond, something intimate. It was so easy with him, so effortless, and I felt like being with him was the most natural thing to do. Like it was just meant to be that way… Sorry if I made it sounded like a total non-sense—“

 

“No, no,” Jisung interrupted, “I got what you meant.”

 

“…am I selfish for hoping that he would care for me more…?” Daniel sighed, “Am I… over-reacting? Am I always behave like this, Hyung?”

“Okay, here’s what well do,” Jisung had no heart to reply Daniel’s question, “Youngsik Hyung told me about your morning hospital’s result. He will probably send the data soon, so in the mean time… just watch everything recent. Try to familiarize yourself with your own songs and choreographies, okay Niel-ah? I’ll try asking about Seongwoo. But you’ve said yourself that he probably resting after his drama shooting, so give him a little break.”

 

“Okay,” Daniel nodded eventhough Jisung couldn’t see him doing it, “Thanks, Hyung…!”

 

Right after Daniel ended the call, a frown appeared on Jisung’s face. It was a good thing that he was done with his current schedule and was waiting for Youngsik inside the van when Daniel called—the whole situation made him kinda dizzy. He was trapped in a sticky situation between Daniel and Seongwoo; being the middleman was surely sucks. “Aish,” He sighed, “This stupid couple. Amnesia or no amnesia, you guys still giving me such headache…!”

 

It took a while for Youngsik to come back as he was queuing to a rather famous _japchae_ store, so Jisung decided to call Seongwoo right away. His call got connected right after the second ring, and Seongwoo answered with a cautious tone. “Yeah, Jisung…?”

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Jisung tried his best not to sounded stern—but he was kinda disappointed with Seongwoo, “…is it safe to assume, since you picked up my call right away, that you’re not busy at the moment?”

 

“Ah, I came back a while ago,” Seongwoo replied, “…and yeah, I’m not busy at the moment…?” 

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Jisung sighed, “You promised me that you won’t try to avoid Daniel.” He thought that it would be better to just ask directly. No need for some wishy-washy chit-chat. On the other side of the line, Seongwoo was quiet for a few seconds. Then he sighed, a long and sorrowful one. “I did,” Seongwoo admitted, “…sorry, Jisung.”

 

“I know that I’m an outsider on your relationship with Daniel, so maybe it wasn’t really appropriate for me to say something—“ Jisung tried his best to formed his sentences, “But you know, in my opinion… you gain nothing by doing all of these… running away thing? You just created more problems, Seongwoo-ya. Avoiding Daniel, lying about your relationship with him… it won’t solve anything.”

 

“I—“

 

“You got your reasons, I got it,” Jisung interrupted, “That’s why I agreed to your plea. But I didn’t want to see you guys destroying each other, that’s why I thought it might be better if I stepped up and say something. May I be honest with you at the moment…?”

 

“Sure,” Seongwoo replied in a really faint whisper.

 

“You would only tormented yourself by doing this,” Jisung tried to say his words as gentle as possible, “You shielded yourself from him, tried to break the connection between the two of you, and I don’t think that it was healthy to do so. You said that you have your own reasons, but you never care to explain about it to me, to us—the rest of WANNA ONE members. You simply said that it was necessary and we need to give you time. We did, but I don’t think that by doing all of these stunts you’ll be happy, Seongwoo-ya. You just made yourself more miserable. And he needs you, you know?”

 

“But he didn’t remember me…”

 

“Exactly,” Jisung pinched the bridge of his nose, “He didn’t remember you, but he still drawn to you. Don’t you realize? It was plain as day that he was _pursuing_ you, that he wanted to be with you, even without his memories. You know, it should be scary: remembering nothing about the present and suddenly thrown into a big mess like this. Yet he tried his best to be calm, to positively face his amnesia. Don’t you think he behaved a rather too calm for someone lost his memories?”

 

It was all silence from Seongwoo’s side, so Jisung added, “He needs you at the moment, Seongwoo-ya. Stop denying him.”

 

“Jisung…” Seongwoo finally said something, and Jisung was taken aback by the despair in his tone, “Do you read the latest news…?”

 

“Which one?”

 

“All of it,” Seongwoo blurted, almost in panic mode, “Everyone was watching. He met me and suddenly we were plastered all over the news. Don’t you see—? Soon or later, these kinds of attention will affect Daniel. _These,_ ” Seongwoo tried his best to find the words, “… _rendezvous_ could destroy his image, his career.”

 

“Personally, I won’t call your relationship a mere  rendezvous, ” Jisung really wanted to sigh. It was hard to speak with Seongwoo, not like this: the Fantagio actor keep denying everything and refused to listen. Daniel dealt with these situations way too often in the past, and Jisung marveled how Daniel could be so patient with the whole banter—the younger male usually have no patience for other stuffs. “Don’t degraded your own relationship, Seongwoo-ya. I know both of you and Daniel cherished each other.”

 

Scolded by Jisung, Seongwoo winced internally. He remembered Daniel’s frustated tone: _Why did you even call our relationship a scandal? Don’t you love me?!_

 

“…what should I do then, Jisung…?” Seongwoo asked his question in an almost inaudible whisper.

 

“You need to face your inner demons,” Jisung reassured him, “You need to believe in yourself. You need to trust Daniel. You need to learn not to over-thinking the bad stuffs, assuming that everything will ended up negatively. I know it won’t be easy for you, but you need to learn to ignore about what other people perceive you and your relationship. What matter the most is the people you care and care about you, not those strangers.

 

“Daniel need you, Seongwoo-ya. He always needs you, and at the current moment he was vulnerable and need your support even more. Don’t leave him in the dark. You need to tell him about the truth. That would be the perfect first step…”

 

“But…”

 

“I didn’t mean that you’ll need to do everything immediately. It’s good to do a big leapt of faith, but you also can do some little baby steps if you weren’t ready yet. You… just need to be honest with yourself. Don’t deprive your own happiness by being stubborn and ended up hurting the people you love,” Jisung tried to phased his words, “You know, it might be a good idea to seek a professional help. Many of the celebs did therapy, you know? Or at least… open up to us. Don’t deny our presence—we are your friends, and we want to help you. You can at least talk your struggles with us, with me, like this.”

 

It was another long pause before Seongwoo let a soft chuckle. “You know, Jisung…” He remembered those lines on his own drama, “You’re right. People keep telling me that I could speak with them… but I was so afraid, you know? I was afraid to be judged, to be labelled silly, that my struggles weren’t a big deal and I made it so bad on my own. I was afraid… that someone will betrayed me and ruined my current happiness…”

 

“You can trust me,” Jisung gave him another reassurance, “I won’t betray you guys, ever.”

 

“I know,” Seongwoo sighed, but somehow he felt lighter—liberated, “Thanks Jisung. I’ll… try to do as you say.”

 

“Great,” Jisung replied, “Talk to you again later?”

 

“Okay.”

 

Seongwoo threw himself to the couch. Palmed his face, he took a deep breath—tried to re-think about everything. He knew he was being so selfish; he was, in some sense, betrayed Daniel during his most vulnerable state. His lover needs him, yet he pushed the other man by denying their relationship. He pushed Daniel out even before the incident happened—his insecurities shackled him down and he let it bounded him further. Daniel had been really patient with him, tried to understand his point of view—yet he failed to put himself on Daniel’s shoes or at least gave a new perspective on the matter from Daniel’s side.

 

He wondered if Daniel ever got tired or fed up with him, since he always behaves like this. Other people would have left him—his former friends for example. They never got a real confrontation, but those friends were slowly drifted apart and they chatted less and less. On the surface they blamed it on his busy schedule and the fact that he was ‘someone’—a famous idol and actor, but beneath all the facade, sometimes he wondered if they relieved that they don’t need to be emotionally drained by being with him like those moments before.

 

But Daniel was always there, always supporting him. The younger man still gaze at him with those eyes—filled with endless love and adoration. _I love you for you, just the way you are_ , Daniel once told him. Before he took Daniel’s sincerity for granted—but now after re-thinking about everything, he knew that he need to repay Daniel’s love with honesty and loyalty, not some cowardly running away act he did.

 

_I need to come clean._

 

Honestly, he was afraid to do so. He had deceived his lovers unfairly, while knowing that Daniel was on his weakest side. He was almost certain that Daniel will get angry at him. He imagined Daniel’s disbelief and disappointed face. _How could you do this to me? Why are you lying to me? So you don’t want me, then?_

 

“No, that’s not it…” The words escaped Seongwoo’s lips. Of course he want Daniel. He loves him, no doubt. He also know that the younger male really care and loves him unconditionally. Seongwoo palmed his eyes, then sighed. He breathed hard—his chest felt heavy. 

 

_So you don’t want me, then?_

 

The sentence haunted him. They got a fight, the night before Daniel’s incident. Seongwoo felt extremely guilty about it. Slowly, he stood up and went to his bedroom. He opened the first drawer on the dresser and pulled out the velvet box. He held his breath as he opened the flap, and the pair of platinum rings inlaid with the peridot and tanzanite gems seemed to mocked him. They were simple and beautiful; the jewellery maker was Daniel’s friend and he somewhat successfully fusion the two gems into one brilliant cut stone, embedded on the middle of the ring. Peridot was one of August birthstones, while Tanzanites was one of the December’s. The artist cut the stones and mixed their blue and green hue with such care it looked like one whole gem. 

 

_I don’t want to give you a simple, overrated diamond_ , Daniel said when he presented the rings. They got several other couple rings before—but while Daniel was so casually took out the box and put it Seongwoo’s ring finger, the older male saw the mobius symbol engraved on it. He knew the rings were special—Daniel had just proposed to him in his own way because Seongwoo wasn’t comfortable yet with coming out and discussing formal marriage and everything. Daniel hinted that they could have an unofficial private ceremony overseas, coated it as a weekend trip to visit his relatives on the states.

 

_Whenever you ready_ , Daniel said. 

 

And Seongwoo had kept him waiting. 

 

Ironically, he forgot the petty matter that started the whole argument that night. Both of them bantered and it exploded into a heated, repeated argument. Same old problems, the ones that never been solved since Seongwoo was so strong-headed about them. It was out of anger when he yelled that he hated it when Daniel insisted his opinion on him and he couldn’t imagine a future of them being together because they argued way too often for small, irrelevant things.

 

Usually Daniel would let those sayings go—brushed it off and pretended that Seongwoo never said those hurtful words. But that night, right after Seongwoo blurted his mean sentence, Daniel looked so betrayed. He looked so exhausted and disappointed and regret creeped into Seongwoo’s heart as he saw the pain on Daniel’s eyes. 

 

“ _So you don’t want me, then?,”_ Daniel chuckled, but there were tears on the rim of his eyes. He took a deep breath, pulled out his ring from his own fingers, then put the platinum band on the wooden counter by the _hyeon gwan_. _“You can keep mine. Throw it away for me,”_ He said as he shoved his feet into his sneakers and unlocked Seongwoo’s front door.

 

Then, before Seongwoo realized what just happened, the door was closed and the automated jingle chimed. He stood there on the living room, stared on the front door with blank eyes. All of the sudden, his home felt cold and lifeless. He felt terribly alone. He wanted to run to the door and chased Daniel, to call the latter’s name, hug his lover and apologize—he wanted to say that he didn’t mean what he said before.

 

But he didn’t do all of it. 

 

Instead of it, he froze before slowly broke down and crouched on the floor, wailing like a madman. Daniel just walked out, and it felt like the younger left him for good; that he had enough of Seongwoo’s shit and couldn’t endure it anymore.

 

He kept Daniel’s and his rings inside the box on the night of Daniel’s accident. Back then he felt like he need to let go of the younger male—because he felt like the younger will be happier without him. He was a fool to believe his own selfish thoughts. But as Jisung had said: Daniel needs him and Seongwoo need to stop running away.

 

Now, at the present time, the pair of rings stared back at him—waiting for him to do something.

 

 

* * *

 

Daniel was randomly changing the channel when his television stopped on the channel that aired Seongwoo’s drama. The Summer’s Constellation drama was currently on the fifth episode. The Fantagio’s character, Tae Woo, was searing salmon on an iron skillet. He was wearing a black apron atop his blue cotton buttoned shirt—the sleeves were rolled up and the BGM song was a catchy English slow song with 80s vibe. Tae Woo smiled as he plated the salmon along with the mixed greens and baby potatoes inside the bento box. He wrapped it using a checkered patterned cloth and slipped the chopsticks case on the knot. 

 

He was supposedly brought the bento box to Hae In—the girlfriend just applied for a new job and she was insanely busy. Tae Woo decided that he would cook and brought Hae In’s favourite dish to cheer her up.

 

Somehow, the image of Seongwoo wearing the apron and cooking something in the kitchen gave Daniel a deja vu feeling. He felt like it was a familiar sight—for a split second he could see Seongwoo’s back, playing with the wooden spatula. Rather than intricate dish like the salmon on the screen, he was making something simple—some stir fry cabbage and beef using some Japanese instant seasoning. The Seongwoo in his memory turned around as Daniel approached him, flashed him a nerveous smile. _“I hope I didn’t mess this up. I’m terrible with cooking.”_

 

_“It’s the instant one, it should be okay. You’re doing great.”_ Daniel heard his own self replied to Seongwoo, and the older male blew raspberry on him, _“Shut up. Both of us knew that you’re the better chef. You made kimchi fried rice better than me.”_

 

Daniel blinked, and suddenly he wasn’t there on the kitchen with Seongwoo. He was sitting on MMO dorm’s living room, the huge flat sponsored television was playing the next scene on the drama: The tired Hae In was half-asleep after she ate the bento. She was in the brink of exhaustion—the whole intern job was taking a toll on her. She met Seo Jun earlier during the big company meeting, and the latter didn’t recognize her. Hae In sneered as it was the _chaebol_ ’s family that caused her family to went bankrupt. Her father also almost kill himself, if it wasn’t Tae Woo whom found him and convinced him not to.

 

_“Are you tired…?”_ Tae Woo asked her, a gentle expression plastered on his face as he took the empty bento box from Hae In’s hands and gave her the tea to drink. 

 

Then again, it was another strong wave of deja vu. Daniel saw Seongwoo on the bed, sitting next to him—their bodies pressed against each other and his head leaned on the older male’s shoulder. He wasn’t feeling well and he felt like burning up—there was also an uneasy feelings that made him wanted to puke, but he held it as he didn’t want to make Seongwoo worry. It was a futile attempt as the older male touched his cheeks, _“Are you tired? Are you not feeling well, Niel-ah…? Are your fever coming back—?“_

 

He mumbled a soft _no_ , but Seongwoo saw through his lie. _“If you are not feeling well, tell me the truth. You have no idea how hurt it was to see you suddenly collapsed on the set like that. Now, don’t be a fool during the fanmeeting. Don’t force yourself, you hear me? You need to rest…”_

 

Daniel knew these particular scene: he remembered the news of him being sick—he collapsed during Master Key’s shooting and Seongwoo was there with him. Their other members were in Japan for their own variety show, and they ended up making a lovelock of his and Seongwoo’s name on the same brass lock. Daniel remembered that particular news apart from the rest, because he fancied the fact that on a tower in Japan, there was a lovelock with their name on it.

 

The flashbacks made him dizzy—they came without warning and hit him one after another. It was overwhelming, but on the other hand it warmed his heart as Seongwoo was caring and being cozy with him. They seemed close on those times, and Daniel yearned for Seongwoo more than ever after all those nostalgic yet forgotten memories. 

 

Then, his phone buzzed.

 

It was an incoming call from Seongwoo. Daniel almost dropped his phone—he was beyond excited. The smartphone slipped through his fingers and almost meet its demise, luckily he caught his phone on time. Hurriedly, he pressed the green button, “HYUNG?!”

“Hey,” On the other side of the line, Seongwoo’s voice was soft and kinda rasp, “Sorry for being out of contact.”

 

“It’s okay…!” Daniel replied a little bit too loud, “It’s okay, Hyung. You must be tired. How’s your drama shooting?”

 

“Great,” There’s a chuckle on the other side of the line, and Daniel despised the fact that the static phone connection distorted Seongwoo’s voice a bit. He wanted to hear the latter’s voice directly, unfiltered with the connection. “The director praised me. In later episodes, the viewer maybe will hate Hae In so much.”

 

“Let me guess, she will do something foolish to Tae Woo.”

 

“Yeah—wait… the voice from the television…” Seongwoo guessed, “Niel-ah, are you watching my drama right now….?”

 

“I am,” Daniel tried to sit comfortably on the couch. On the screen, Hae In was talking with Seo Jun. The female protagonist was the lowly intern while Seo Jun was the son of the CEO, so she awkwardly tried her best not to sneer. She once loved this sunbae so much, yet it was his family whom destroyed her family almost to the point of death.

 

“You know,” Seongwoo paused for a second, “There was rumours about you being a cameo on the drama.”

 

“Really?” Daniel seemed excited. That wasn’t bad. Actually he didn’t mind being a cameo, because it was Seongwoo’s drama. Daniel had heard that even Seongwoo was the second male lead, but the viewers love him so much to the point the writer added more scenes to the drama. “I wouldn’t say no if the drama crew asked me… as long as it was a role related to your character, Hyung.”

 

Seongwoo laughed, “I’ll tell the director next time about it.”

“We acted together before, right…?” Daniel asked, and Seongwoo gave his confirmation, “That’s right. On the “Beautiful” MV, we were the separated brothers that looking for each other.”

 

“I read the articles,” Daniel muttered, “I had said that it was you whom taught me how to act. Unfortunately, I didn’t have any memories of that matter. Could you teach me one more time, Hyung?”

 

“That will be no problem at all.”

 

It was silence for a few seconds, but then Daniel said: “…I miss you.” _I really want to see you._ Seongwoo’s heart tightened. “Hmm,” He replied almost immediately, “Me too.”

 

Seongwoo’s tone was heartfelt—filled with emotions. Hearing the latter’s reply, Daniel’s heart soared. He was agitated and couldn’t calm down. All the cells in his body yearned for his Hyung, and the yearning feeling overwhelmed him. Daniel glanced on the clock hanged on the wall—it was quite late, but he wanted to push his luck. “Hyung…?”

 

“Yeah, Niel-ah?”

 

“May I come…?”

 

There was another silence on the other side of the line, but finally Seongwoo replied. “Sure,” He said, “I’ll wait for you.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a fanfiction about Daniel collapsed during Master Key's shooting before--it's not really related to the flashback on this chapter, but if you want to read it please visit the oneshot [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12951444) :D


	9. I’m here. There’s nothing to be afraid of.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He buried his face on the latter’s chest, Daniel’s scent enveloped him.   
> The familiar smell gave him a sense of security, an anchor, a safe haven that assured him.   
> Nothing to afraid of, just like Daniel have said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning, lovelies~!  
> Another Monday morning, means another chapter update~  
> Hope this newest chapter will be a nice way to start your day ^^
> 
> I inserted Sewoon's song to this chapter, you may wanna to play [the song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBaEVC2aWqQ) while reading the scene :)

* * *

_“I’ll wait for you.”_

 

Hearing Seongwoo’s answer, a grin formed on Daniel’s face. He felt like jumping around, pumping his fist to the air while yelling a loud _WOOOYEEEAAAAHHH!_ but he tried his best to contain his excitement. Instead, his body trembled from anticipation. The wide smile curled the corner of his lips up and he couldn’t put it down; it was hard to change his expression—Daniel knew for sure if he looked at a mirror at the current moment, he would see a grinning fools stared back at him as the reflection.

 

“I’ll be there,” Daniel said as he rushed into his room, “I’ll call you again when I’m there, Hyung.”

 

“Okay,” Seongwoo must be smiling as he replied, because Daniel swore he could _hear_ the smile on the older male’s tone. His excitement rushed his adrenaline even more; and soon after Seongwoo ended the call, Daniel almost tossed his phone. Correction, he did throw it onto the bed. 

 

He opened his wardrobe cabinet and stood there, hands folded in front of his chest as he was pondering about which outfit he should wear. He felt the jitters inside his stomach—filled with butterflies as if he was going to a date. Date. Is this counted as a date? He wanted to look his best, to impress Seongwoo—

 

_“For God’s sake, Daniel,” Jisung rolled his eyes. He was sitting on a bunkbed, and Daniel remembered the interior: it was Produce 101’s Paju Dorm. “Just wear your jacket and pick one of that damned checkered shirts. I couldn’t see any differences between the five of them.”_

 

_“They all got different patterns…!” He insisted, shook his head and pouted to Jisung, “You didn’t get it, Hyung. It was Seongwoo. He finally agreed to go for a date with me.” He acted like a spoiled teen protested to his parents because they aren’t ‘cool enough’ and Jisung deadpanned as he sighed, “Daniel, you asked him to go to the corner’s convinience shop with you. It was barely five minutes away. It’s not a date. Trust me, he will show up wearing his usual black shirt.”_

 

_“It’s a date,” He pouted once more, acted childish—it’s his privilege being the maknae of MMO group, “And he complimented my checkered shirts. He said it was cool.”_

 

_“He’s being polite.”_

 

_“Aish, Jisung Hyung, you are NOT helping. At all. Geez.”_

 

Daniel blinked, and he was back on his Itaewon’s MMO dorm. “What—“ He blinked again. He repeated his actions several times as he stared at dozens of designer and sponsored articles of clothings in front of him. _Is that his past memory?_ He was doing similar thing—excitedly picked his outfit because Seongwoo agreed to hang out with him.

 

_So I was so whipped even before, eh?_

 

He tried to pull himself together, and reached for his oversized LAP coat and matching shirts. The bright colour looked attractive, and cool in a badass way. He held the hanger and put the material atop of his body, posed himself in front of the wardrobe’s built-in mirror. The combination looked great and effortless, also—

 

_“You always dress cooly, eh Niel-ah.”_

_The older male styled his hair into his trademark comma hair. The curled part casted a soft shadow on his skin, yet the milky tone appeared even paler due to the contrast of the raven tone of his dark hair. There were a slight flush of pink from the alcohol, dusted the Fantagio’s cheeks. Daniel could taste the liquor on Seongwoo’s breath; the older male never got a strong limit to begin with._

 

_“You always look cool and amazing,” Seongwoo looked ethereally beautiful, like an incubus; seductive eyes and playful smirk. He was holding the lapel of Daniel’s leather jacket, the studded material fitted his figure amazingly and showed off his broad shoulder. Seongwoo’s eyes looked dazed, and the golden hue from the lights gleamed on his obsidian-like orbs. He smiled again, warm and inviting, and Daniel swore that he melted just from the sight alone._

 

_He cupped Seongwoo’s cheeks—they felt warm under his touch. The glassy orbs reflected his own image, and Daniel felt a surge of possessiveness when he saw himself on Seongwoo’s eyes. Daniel licked his own lips and leaned in, brought their face closer to sealed their lips together._

 

_It was a centimetre away when Seongwoo put his finger on Daniel’s lips and pushed him away—giggled as he put a pout on his face and shook his head to Daniel. “No,” He said, “Hold your horses, Mister. I have a lover, you know.”_

 

All of the sudden, Daniel was there—back to his own dorm. He blinked again, and his own reflection stared back at him, looked dumbfounded and startled. There’s a pang on his heart—his chest hurt. Damn, it _hurts._ Seriously. 

 

_“I have a lover, you know.”_

Of course, how he could possibly forget about Seongwoo’s mysterious lover? The older male was drunk, and yet he still remembered his beloved. 

 

_Who is that person, Hyung…?_

 

_Couldn’t it be me instead…?_

 

* * *

 

**@ongnieluv**

[pics]

Kang Daniel spotted on the Itaewon street. He was wearing his LAP shirt and pink jacket. And is that Reebok sneakers…? 

**via twitter**

 

**@beautifulstars**

[pics] [pics]

Kang Daniel wore LAP outfits… Guess which jacket and shirt combo appeared on LAP’s IG ads soon after? [link]

**via twitter**

 

**@wannalight** replied to **@beautifulstars**

It was sold out already on LAP’s website!! TT______TT

[uglycry.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@rekitouya** replied to **@beautifulstars**

LAP is intelectual alright :))

**via twitter**

 

**@Ageha**

[pics] [pics]

It’s just me or he wore that same outfit less than a week ago? He seemed to really love that outfit!

**via twitter**

 

**@gyash** replied to **@Ageha**

[pics] [pics] [pics] [pics] 

Daniel seemed to have several favourite outfits. He also wear the same stripped pyjamas several times before. God bless the maker and those opened button on the shoulders!! #dayum

**via twitter**

 

**@spectreofstardust**

[pics] 

Wow. Kang Daniel wore the Reebok shoes and guess what: the said model was immediately sold out OMG #fangirlingpower

**via twitter**

 

**@ramenrulz8P**

[pics] [pics] [pics] [pics]

A van picked Kang Daniel up. It seemed that his manager picked him up. The question is: where to? What do you think, guys? #wink

**via twitter**

 

**@Yixings_Yeoja**

[pics]

My friend sent me this: apparently Kang Daniel’s van entered Ong Seongwoo’s apartment building. Are you thinking what I’m thinking???

**via twitter**

 

**@ongongong** replied to **@Yixings_Yeoja**

OMG OMG IS IT ANOTHER DATE ////////// 

[excitedscream.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@ongniellover** replied to **@Yixings_Yeoja**

Lately we have been blessed with so many Ongniel moments!! OMG YASH!

[confetti.gif] 

**via twitter**

 

**@lovestruly** replied to **@Yixings_Yeoja** and **@ongniellover**

I wondered if the cameo rumour will be revealed to be true~ #wink

**via twitter**

 

**@girlackles** replied to **@lovestruly** and **@Yixings_Yeoja** and **@ongniellover**

It will be great!! OMG I wonder which character Daniel will assigned to be. Will he appear as himself or someone from the drama universe? I want the character to be related with Tae Woo somehow~! 

[fistpump.gif]

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

Daniel was almost way too quiet during the whole journey. 

Youngsik stole some glances at him via the rear mirror, and noticed the somewhat gloomy expression on his artist’s face. It was rather odd since they were headed to Seongwoo’s place and minutes ago Daniel was so excited when he contacted him and asked him if Youngsik could picked him up. Daniel even requested him to buy some _jokbal_ and beer because the former is Seongwoo’s favourite supper menu. The _jokbal_ aroma escaped its container and filled the small van’s space with a really delicious, mouth-watering smell. 

 

Youngsik wanted to ask Daniel “ _What are you thinking?”_ but he didn’t want to probe the latter’s privacy and swallowed his questions back. So he let Daniel sat there on the middle seat, head leaned towards the car’s tinted window—watched Seoul’s bright and colourful neon lights that filled the night sky.

 

There were thousands of things struggled inside Daniel’s head—bickering endlessly. The most profound sound came, clear as day and haunting like a nightmare: _What are you doing, Daniel? Seongwoo Hyung has a lover already, you know?_ He shook his head, let an annoyed _tsk_ that startled Youngsik on the driver seat.

 

“Are you OK?” Youngsik finally asked. Daniel let a long sigh, wondered if he could ask his manager about the matter, “Youngsik Hyung—“

 

“Yeah?”

“Have you told Jihyo Noona that you like her?”

 

Their van swayed for a bit, but Youngsik controlled the steering wheel well. “Yah…!” He protested, face blushed—his cheeks and ears were red, “Why’d you ask—!” His _satoori_ came out, as he was nervous.

 

“Well, I do notice,” Daniel shrugged, “From the way you talk with her, it was obvious that you have feelings for her. You said you two were often in contact with each other.”

 

“That’s ‘cause we need to compare your and Seongwoo’s schedule—“

 

“Yeah that,” Daniel reasoned, “But you do like her, don’t you?”

 

“Mmm,” The blush on Youngsik’s face explained everything, “But why you suddenly asked about that?”

 

“Well, if— If Jihyo Noona already have a lover, what would you do Hyung?” 

 

The question made Youngsik thought for a while. “Based on my knowledge,” He replied, “Jihyo is single though. But since you asked: if Jihyo already has a lover, I would check if her lover was worthy to stay by her side. It’s okay if she was happy and the lover is a great person, but if she wasn’t happy with the relationship… I will step up and pursue her.”

 

Daniel made a _woooooo_ sound and clapped his hands in amusement, “Whoooaaaa how manly…! Cool response, Hyung…!”

 

“Aish, shut it will you…?” Youngsik pretended to be annoyed, but he grinned bashfully. His _satoori_ came back, “But really, why’d you ask?”

 

“Because I do need the advice.”

It was a great decision to ask Youngsik. His answer was great and Daniel really could applied it to his own case. Youngsik’s answer made his heart a little bit lighter: Daniel need to see if Seongwoo’s lover was worthy of him or not. If Seongwoo wasn’t in a happy relationship, Daniel swore to stepped in and protect his Hyung.

 

Youngsik was confused with Daniel’s answer, but he didn’t push further. Their van entered the building and Youngsik parked their van near the lift. Daniel took his bag and thanked Youngsik for the ride, but before he closed the door he teased: “Hyung, do invite Jihyo Noona to a date sometimes whenever the two of you have time for it.”

 

He laughed and dashed to the lift, and the red-faced Youngsik yelled in embarassment, “AISH THIS KID…! Stop teasing your elder…!”

 

The security guard stationed near the lift recognized Daniel, nodded at him and ask, “Visiting Ong Seongwoo-ssi?” 

 

Daniel smiled, almost beamed. “Yes…!” He replied cheerfuly. He was holding the _jokbal_ ’s container and his own travelling bag, so both of his hand was occupied. Almost immediately, before Daniel shifted the _jokbal_ ’s bag to his other hand, the security tapped his pass card and pushed the lift button. “Here you go,” He proudly let Daniel entered the lift, “Have a great night, Kang Daniel-ssi!”

 

“Thank you..!” Daniel bowed. The lift’s metal door closed, and he was shifting his weight from one of his leg to the other repeatedly, thumped his feet in excitement. The digital number on the panel reached Seongwoo’s floor number, and the door opened after a nice, loud _ding!_

 

He still remembered the passcode since it was an easy six series of code. Seongwoo told him about the passcode before during his previous visit. He found the door and proceed to press the code button on the handle. The soft chime heard soon after, indicated the door had been unlocked, then Daniel pushed the handle.

 

He could hear music played from the radio—the radio DJ was complimenting another Produce 101’s idol, Jung Sewoon and said that the current song played was his favourite. The other DJ commented that it was the soundtrack for a famous drama series, and they need to stop talking since their listener need to hear the song without them talking over the song.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _Like destiny, it’s always you_

_It’s you, even if I close my eyes_

_It’s you, I only see you_

_It’s you, like starlight in the night sky_

_You’re the only one who shines in my heart_

_It’s you ♪_ ♫♬

 

On the couch, Seongwoo was reading his script. He was wearing a loose baggy shirt, a faded grey sweatpants, his hair was unstyled—some of his fringe touched the rim of the eyeglasses he wore. Seongwoo seemed to be absolutely absorbed into his script and didn’t notice Daniel at all. For a second, Daniel hesitated—Seongwoo looked too beautiful even on his sloppy clothes. The older male looked like a painting, like a scene from a drama, and Daniel didn’t want to destroy the serenity in front of him.

 

Nevertheless, Seongwoo noticed the _jokbal_ ’s delicious smell and turned his head to the entrance. Daniel nudged his sneakers out using his other feet and stepped into the living room. Seongwoo stood up from his couch, stared at him with indescribable expression. “Hey,” Daniel’s awkwardly smile, showing the _jokbal_ with a proud face, “I’m here.”

 

♪ ♫♬ _It’s you_

_Even if I’m not in your heart anymore_

_I’m in your eyes, I know_

_Even if I can’t go into your arms_

_Still, it’s only you for me ♪_ ♫♬

 

To Daniel dismay, Seongwoo’s face was blank when he saw him entered the apartment. _Wait, you knew that I’m coming right, Hyung? So why did you look at me like… that? You looked so rigid, as if you were seeing a ghost._ Then, after Daniel said “I’m here.” to ease the tension, there were a sudden, soft gasp and tears fell from Seongwoo’s eyes. Those tears streamed down onto his cheeks and dripped from his chin. The script fell from his hand and dropped on the floor with a rather dramatic _thud_ , and Seongwoo’s tears poured even more.

 

Daniel was startled, hurriedly put the _jokbal_ to the counter cabinet and practically threw his bag and dashed to Seongwoo. “Hyung…?!” He panicked, “Hyung…?! Are you okay?” He didn’t know what happened and what to do; Seongwoo face was so crestfallen and he looked like he was in a great heartache. 

 

He was speechless and totally confused, so Daniel did what his instinct told him to: he grabbed Seongwoo and hugged him tight. He cradled the latter’s leaner body inside his embrace, eased and patted the latter’s back in circular patterns. It wasn’t a great difference of height between the two of them, but they got different built and somehow Seongwoo fitted inside his embrace like the correct piece of puzzle.

 

The older male burried his face on Daniel’s chest, his tears felt hot on Daniel’s shirt. His legs seemed to buckled, so Daniel shifted their weight and let Seongwoo leaned onto him. The raven haired finally hugged him back—fingers clasped tight onto the Daniel’s torso. 

 

“Ssshhh,” Daniel tried to soothe the latter, “It’s okay. I’m here. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

 

_I’m here. There’s nothing to be afraid of._

 

All of the sudden, memories rushed back to Seongwoo. Daniel said the same thing before, and it broke his heart even more. He missed Daniel—he missed his lover, he missed the bond they have, and he hated himself for distancing Daniel from the truth. The memories brought back all the trauma and his feeling surged up like the wavy ocean during the storm, overwhelming and unmercifully drowned him even further.

 

Jung Sewoon’s song was still playing on the background, the lyrics hit him hard, over and over again.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _Like destiny, it’s always you_

_It’s you, even if I close my eyes_

_It’s you, I only see you_

_It’s you, like starlight in the night sky_

_You’re the only one who shines in my heart_

_It’s you ♪_ ♫♬

 

When Seongwoo saw Daniel on the entrance, he was caught off-guard. He was reading a particularly heart-breaking scene, and he tried to dig onto his own vulnerable moments to figure out how Tae Woo will react. Then, the _jokbal_ ’s aroma hit his senses and he noticed Daniel—the younger male was wearing his LAP shirt and pink hooded jacket, the ripped jeans elongated his long legs even more.

 

It was the same outfit Daniel wore when they fight the night before his amnesia’s incident.

Sure, Daniel didn’t paired it with the same sneakers and jeans, but the combo of the LAP shirt andpink jacket totally struck Seongwoo as the grief from the particular night roared like a tsunami and hit him hard. 

 

He recalled Daniel’s forlorn expression, the dejected look on his eyes—the betrayed look that pained Seongwoo’s heart. It was coming back at him, tenfold. It felt like he was there, back to thatnight; Daniel took off his ring and put it on the counter, his broad back looked so miserable and somewhat hunched. _“You can keep mine,”_ His voice was rasp and tired, _“Throw it away for me.”_

 

Seongwoo wanted to call his name; he wanted to chase and hugged him, apologized—He wanted to say that he didn’t mean it when he told Daniel he couldn’t imagine a future with him. And to make it even worse, the image of Daniel wearing the outfit overlapped with another memories: the younger male often to visit him. Each time, Daniel would bring some food—and _jokbal_ was one of the menu that alwayspresent because it’s Seongwoo’s favourite.

 

_“I’m here,”_ He would say, grinned as he showed Seongwoo the food. They would eat it together and most of the time, Daniel would slept over and cuddled with him all night. 

 

It was hard to describe how he felt at the moment, but Seongwoo crashed down and cried. He could only cope by crying his feelings out. He was keeping all of his emotions inside, bottled them way too long, and like an opened bottle of shaken champagne—it burst out after the cork was removed. 

 

And Daniel reacted immediately, memory or no memory; the younger was there for him, gentle and caring and loves him nonetheless. Jisung was right. Daniel loves him even without his memories, and Seongwoo wanted to scold himself for lying and concealing the truth from Daniel. 

 

He buried his face on the latter’s chest, Daniel’s scent enveloped him. The familiar smell gave him a sense of security, an anchor, a safe haven that assured him. Nothing to afraid of, just like Daniel have said. The younger male keep cradling him, rocked him gently, like a mother did to her newborn baby. Those hands patted his back, combed his hair, occasionally wiped his tears.

 

“Niel-ah,” Seongwoo’s voice was rasp, hiccuped from his long fit. He wanted to tell everything, to reveal the secrets he held, but those steadfast and concerned eyes made Seongwoo’s heart cowered down. 

 

_Will Daniel be angry after he learned the truth?_

_Will Daniel be disappointed with him?_

_Will the younger male finally fed up with him, after all these lies and deceits…?_

 

The radio had long changed it’s programme, and the new DJ radio introduced the show’s catchphrase in the background. Neither of him or Daniel listened to the chatter, both of them were occupied to each other. Seongwoo’s script was long forgotten, crumpled on the carpet. Seongwoo was still hugging Daniel, his arms didn’t have any intention of letting go. He wanted to savour the moment, to prolonged the moment even for just a minute more.

 

On the other hand, Daniel actually felt and thought the same thing. It was confusing and overwhelming; to see Seongwoo being so emotional and losing his composed self, he had no idea about what happened to the older male yet he know that he couldn’t left the latter alone. Being to able giving the raven haired somekind of consolation gave him a sense of accomplishment, a happiness of being supportive and actually helpful.

 

They stayed on that position for quite a while, until both of them need to move their limbs. Seongwoo sighed and raised his face up, stared on Daniel, wordlessly—yet those dark orbs held so much to converse. Daniel saw those wet, tear bounded eyelashes blinked; Seongwoo’s pupils were dilated, blown wide—reflected his own image on those glassy surface. 

 

Seeing his own reflection on Seongwoo’s eyes, Daniel felt a sudden surge of emotional feelings. It felt like a cliche _your eyes were focusing on me and me alone_ kind of possessiveness. He cupped the latter’s face, wiped the tears left on those red rims, his thumbs lingered on Seongwoo’s triangular mole and Daniel’s heart swelled.

 

He leaned in, closing the gap between the two of them; and as gentle as the soft flutters of the butterfly’s wings, he pressed his lips against Seongwoo’s and kissed him softly.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....how many of you screamed on the ending scene? LOL  
>  /run away


	10. So love me back and be mine...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Seongwoo-ya,” His eyes stared straight onto Seongwoo’s dark eyes, “Spend this lifetime with me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morning, lovelies~!  
> It's another Monday morning and that means another new chapter :D  
> Things will heated up on the next chapter, so prepare your kokoro~  
> ((Meanwhile, I tried to make this chapter as fluff as I could))
> 
> Enjoy~!

 

* * *

 

The kiss started as an innocent impulse.

It was a second later when Daniel realized that he was crossing his boundaries and forced himself without Seongwoo’s consent, right after the older male’s sudden outburst. It was supposed to be the latter’s most vulnerable moment, and Daniel felt like a cheater, a jerk that took advantage of the matter.

 

He gasped and tried to pull back, but Seongwoo circled his arms around his shoulders and murmured his name. There wasn’t any rejection or dislike on his voice, the tone was rather encouraging and needy. The actor kissed him back, slightly chapped soft lips kneaded his lips back before slightly parting—inviting him to do more.

 

So Daniel complied and deepened the kiss. 

It felt euphoric and he wanted to freeze the time into eternity: Seongwoo was there, inside his embrace; the older male leaned and clung onto his shoulder, those luscious lips felt warm and sweetly sinful. Every kiss made Daniel even hungrier; he changed their angle and nibbled on Seongwoo’s lower lip, before kissed the latter again passionately. 

 

It turned into a long savoured and sloppy, messy kiss. There were wanton noises escaped from Seongwoo’s throat, followed by the erotic sound of his breath. The older male moaned for the kiss, their erratic breath mixed together and Daniel’s possessiveness soared. His whole body screamed _mine, you’re mine_ and he hugged Seongwoo even tighter.

 

“Niel-ah,” Seongwoo’s voice was faint, almost a whisper. The raven haired pecked on Daniel’s lips, Daniel could felt the smile on the latter’s lips as they devoured each other. Seongwoo seemed to enjoyed the moment, and Daniel pushed the thoughts of Seongwoo’s mysterious lover away. He pushed Seongwoo’s body onto the couch, sucked on the lips vigorously, fingers caressed the latter’s body—

 

Then the growling sound interrupted the moment.

 

Both of them stopped—stared on each other. Seongwoo was there beneath him, one of his legs nestled on Daniel’s hip, his arms still circled the younger male’s broad shoulder. He looked absolutely debauched with swollen red lips, glass eyes, flushed skin, ruffled hair and licentious aura painted all over his body. There was still a thin, spiderweb-like wet trail of saliva connected their lips before it broke and formed a wet stain on the corner of Seongwoo’s lower lip. Those pupils were still dilated, blown so wide—Seongwoo looked dazed with those tinge of pink stained his cheeks and the tip of his ears, down to his neck. 

 

The older male seemed to be as confused as him, because neither of them could comprehend the source of the noise. There were a lewd mewl escaped from Seongwoo’s lips as their making out was suddenly interrupted, but the loud growling sound was soon heard once again.

 

Took a few second for both of them to mentally grasped that it came from Seongwoo’s stomach—it rumbled again and the smell of the _jokbal_ reminded them about the long forgotten supper. It was an awkward silence before they finally reacted. “…pfff,” Seongwoo laughed, embarrassed on himself. His stomach practically cockblocked himself. 

 

“What a timing, Hyung,” Daniel laughed; eyes crinkled into those thin, cresent shaped line. He covered his mouth using the back of his hand, and couldn’t stop his laughing. Seongwoo pretended to pout, but he nodded, “it was a really bad timing, indeed.”

 

“Okay then,” Daniel slowly moved from the couch and helped Seongwoo to sit. He went to the counter and took the _jokbal_ package, “Shall we eat…?”

 

“….yes, please.”

 

Moments later, they sat on the floor, leaned onto a short wooden table and sharing the _jokbal_ directly from the container. The pink jacket was nicely hanged on the coat hanger near the entrance. Daniel made a mixture of beer and soju, both of them ate the trotters along with the drink. They watched a 2015 released Korean movie on Seongwoo’s wasted TV cable’s subscription; the furniture designer wakes up in a different body every day, regardless of age, gender and nationality. Whenever he sleeps, his appearance changed. Sometimes he's a man, sometimes he’s a woman; he could turned into someone old, young, or even a foreigner. 

 

It was hard for him to live a normal life, The ones knew about his condition were his own mother and a childhood friend of him. Everytime he wakes up, it’s a battle: his house owned so many male and female clothings, shoes in every sizes, eyeglasses in every prescription—it was more like a warehouse since he never knew which body he will ended up with each time.

 

He fell in love with a girl from the furniture store, and pursued her persistently when he finally ended up with a handsome appearance. He tried hard not to sleep so he won’t lose the current appearance, but he dozed off and turned into an old man.

 

After a few conflicts, the female lead finally learned his secret and she was able to accept the protagonist’s condition. Seongwoo was fascinated with each actor and actress that portrayed the protagonist, explained to Daniel about their technical mannerism and gesture, praised each one of them because each one of them were brilliant in their own portrayal. 

 

Daniel had watched the movie before with his friends—the movie was released at 2015 after all. Once in a while, Daniel would recite the dialogues along with the characters; Seongwoo remembered that Daniel often does these kind of quotes recital. On one episode of Happy Together, Daniel even revealed this is how he practiced his English using foreign movies to recite. 

 

It was a blissful night. They sat there in the middle of Seongwoo’s living room. The _jokbal_ container was finally empty and the last can of beer was opened. Seongwoo felt a little bit tipsy, he leaned his back on the couch, his legs brushed together with Daniel’s long legs. It was hard to focus on the screen; the television felt way too bright and his sight blurred. Seongwoo tried to keep his eyes open as the movie reached one of the conflict scene between the leads.

 

_“I thought we are on the same page,”_ Daniel said the lines along with the character on the screen, _“But now I realize that we were reading different books.”_

 

It was a line from the movie, but somehow it pierced Seongwoo’s conscience hard. He could relate to the dialogue; it was him and Daniel, with their point of view differences. It was them, fighting over and over for the same, old matters because Seongwoo refused to let it slide and kept nitpicking about every single possibility. It was them, love each other deeply yet bickering endlessly with each other. 

 

“It was amazing though,” Daniel commented, “That the girl keep recognizing him everytime, regardless of his appearances. I guess, if you truly love someone… you’ll just know.”

 

Seongwoo shifted his sight onto Daniel. The latter’s side profile wasn’t as sharp as his, but Daniel’s tall nose and his v shaped jaw was attractive and demanded to be adored. The younger male’s eyes were focused on the movie, his emotions were raw and clearly written on his face. Daniel empathized with the characters; he laughed, frowned, winced, smiled and clapped along with them. No matter how they painted him as a seductive and sinful man on the stage, the everyday Daniel was just a pure, overgrown puppy that genuinely nice and sometimes childish.

 

He fell asleep like that; stared at Daniel while the latter watched the movie, oblivious that he was stared at. It was minutes later when Daniel thought that Seongwoo was being way too quiet and looked back—the older male was asleep, leaned on the couch, his head drooped to the side, the accent throw pillow cushioned the side of his face. 

 

Daniel held his breath involuntarily. 

Seongwoo was barefaced, there were a trace of red on his nose and tears marks near his eyes, his lips slightly opened—yet he looked so ethereally beautiful. His sharp features made him looked like something came out from the myth realm; something carved from pure block of marble by some famous sculptor like Michael Angelo or Auguste Rodin, something bewitching like the fairies’s spells from Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night's Dream.

 

His eyes were fixed on Seongwoo’s lips: those luscious lips were still slightly swollen, well-kissed and enticing to be devoured again. Daniel touched his own lips, remembered the latter’s soft and sweet taste against his own a moment before. It was an exhilarating experience, to be able to held and kiss the older male like that. It was both tender and passionate; the shared moment was so perfect and Daniel held himself well as he wanted to cherished the latter. He didn’t want to push his luck again to go across the border, merely complied to Seongwoo’s needs.

 

Daniel wondered why Seongwoo cried. _Are you… sad, Hyung? Troubled by any means? Did you quarrelled with your lover? Is it because of me? You looked so broken hearted and you even kissed me back. I wonder if it was your payback for revenge—am I considered a chess pawn of yours, Hyung? It was me whom kissed you first, but…_

 

“Nghh…” There were tension between Seongwoo’s eyebrows. His furrowed look made him seemed unease, chased by a nightmare. Immediately, Daniel scooted over and touched the gap between those eyebrows, gently nudged the crease. Seongwoo seemed to repsond to the touch, mumbled another “Mmm” before he quieted down.

 

Daniel smiled and took the remote and turned off the TV, eliminated any noise that could disturb the older male’s slumber. Carefully, he cleaned up the _jokbal_ container, the cans of beers, the empty bottles of soju; put them to the recycle bag before wiped the table using the rag. After a moment of hesitating, he opened the door to Seongwoo’s bedroom. He approached the older male, put the latter’s hand around him, and carried him bridal style to the bed.

 

He put Seongwoo on the mattress, covered him using the blanket, and paused for a while to combed the array fringe that fell on the latter’s forehead. Daniel wondered if there were any ice packs or small towel he could use to compress Seongwoo’s eyes. Just when he turned away to look for them, something tugged the hem of his shirt.

 

“Wha—“ Daniel turned around and found that eventhough he was asleep, Seongwoo held the the hem of his shirt and refused to let go. Those frown came back to the older male’s face, followed by a pool of tears. Daniel gasped, his heart ached from the sight. He went back to the older male’s side and wiped the tears away.

 

_What are you dreaming about—? Why are you keep having nightmare, Hyung?_ Daniel’s thumb stopped on the older male’s moles. Slowly he sat on the bed and leaned down. He kissed the latter’s eyelids, then he whispered, “I’m here… I’m with you…”

 

Daniel took Seongwoo’s hand and one fingers at a time, he released Seongwoo’s grip from his shirt. A second later, Seongwoo grabbed his shirt again, almost immediately. Daniel didn’t know if he should be glad or not. He was glad that the older male acted so cute and dependent towards him, but he was still wearing his jeans and it wasn’t the most comfortable thing to wear as sleepwear.

 

But seeing the way Seongwoo clung onto him, Daniel’s heart melted. Chuckled, he let out an adoring sigh and dived under the blanket, positioned himself beside Seongwoo. In response, Seongwoo mumbled something and scooted over, cuddled himself onto Daniel’s embrace. “Are you drunk, Hyung….?” Daniel asked, and Seongwoo didn’t answer as he was blissfully asleep. 

 

“Seriously, you are torturing me Hyung…” Daniel felt helpless. He stared at Seongwoo’s sleeping face: now that they were sharing the bed and Seongwoo cuddled him like this, the latter’s sleeping expression mellowed and peaceful. Daniel’s heart swelled with indescribable feelings asSeongwoo then placed his head against Daniel’s chest. It felt familiar, the deja vu feeling enveloped him—

 

_“Sigh…”_

_The wooden floor was hard, but warm due the central floor heating. Music was blasting from the speaker, repeating the same song over and over again. They lied there in the middle of the practice room, breathless and drenched with sweats—limbs felt sore and numb. Rows of mirrors reflected their figure, ruffled and exhausted beyond words._

 

_Seongwoo rolled over and put his head on Daniel’s torso. “I’m sweaty,” Daniel reminded him, internally afraid that he smelled bad—they practiced for hours and he could smelled the sweat’s smell on himself already. Seongwoo just laughed, “It’s okay, I’m also sweaty and smelled like a dirty rag.”_

 

“Ah?”

 

_It was dark and cramped when Daniel opened his eyes. The only light source in the room was the bluish soft glow from Seongwoo’s aromatheraphy humidifier that had been set to turned off by itselft after an hour. Seongwoo was there inside his embrace, face buried into Daniel’s chest, one of his arm circled Daniel’s torso. It was warm under the blanket, and Seongwoo smelled nice like citrus and sandalwood._

 

_“That’s why I told you not to store your seals on your bed,” Daniel chuckled, and Seongwoo only replied with a faint whine. The younger male cradled Seongwoo closer in return, and went back to sleep._

 

Another memories flashed inside his head: _They were sharing a small single bed, hands binded by a long piece of red ribbon, tied on their wrist. Seongwoo was almost squished to the side wall, so after a few hours of whining that_ Daniel is too big _and_ Why are you so big, Niel-ah? _the older male half-lied atop of Daniel’s body. While Daniel’s body spread out like a starfish, the raven haired positioned himself in a semi fetal position, his head was on Daniel’s shoulder, one of his leg was cradling Daniel’s hip._

 

_Daniel wanted to move his body, but he was afraid to wake Seongwoo up, so he tried to restrict his own movement. He stole a glance on the latter’s peaceful sleeping face, and his lips curled upwards into a smile. “Sleep tight, Seongwoo-ya.”_

 

Daniel blinked.

He was back on Seongwoo’s current bedroom, lied there beside the older male, sharing the same blanket. Seongwoo was there, right beside him, his sleeping face was unchanged and way too familiar to Daniel. Yet, he couldn’t remember most of their past—and it frustrated him.

 

It was clear that it wasn’t the first time they slept together like this, because he had the sleepover the night before, but it seemed that they do sleep together often in the past—based on his memories. He and Seongwoo seemed close, unguarded; the older male always sleep in these particular fetal position, cuddled against him.

 

Daniel was confused—since Seongwoo got a lover… right? Do the person mind? He and Ong seemed to do a lot of skinship, at least off camera, during their private time. Jealousy surged inside his heart, and Daniel pouted.

 

“Mmmh…” Seongwoo stirred a bit in his sleep, but soon went back to sleep. Daniel gazed at him with a storm brewing inside of him. He slowly touched Seongwoo’s lips—it was warm and soft under his thumbs. Held his breath, Daniel leaned closer and stole a kiss on the raven haired’s lips, then pecked for a few more times and convinced himself that it was enough; stolen kisses were bad enough, and he didn’t want Seongwoo to hate him due the lack of consent from his side.

 

It was late and he was tired. Daniel slowly fell asleep while watching Seongwoo’s face, drifted into the slumber. The older male felt warm inside his embrace, his own heartbeat slowly synched with the latter’s heartbeat.

 

_Good night, Hyung._

_Please don’t have another nightmare._

_Please dream about me, instead._

 

* * *

 

“Hey.”

The other male waved at him. Daniel jogged his way, Seongwoo was stood there near the intersection. Daniel made another mental check: he was wearing a shirt beneath his red checkered patten. The dark beanie covered most of his pink hair; or better said, what have left from his pink hair. The colour had bleed into a orangeish peach colour. He had carefully choose his dark ripped denim along with his white sneakers to complete the outfit, and Jisung almost threw the comb at him since Daniel nagged him non-stop about his outfit.

 

“Aish, Kang Daniel—you are going to the minimarket,” Jisung emphasized on each syllables, “Mi-ni-mar-ket. It was five minutes away, just wear whatever…!”

 

Jisung just don’t get it. It was Seongwoo: he will visit the minimarket along with Seongwoo. Just look at the Fantagio trainee: the older male was wearing a black parka on top of his black coloured shirt. A black tight pants, black sneakers with white lining, a black cap. See, even with black on black, he absolutely looked amazingly handsome. Just see his pose, leaning on the brick wall like that—oh wait. Damn. Jisung was right: Seongwoo was wearing his usual black shirt.

 

_But he looked so great,_ Daniel felt giddy as he approached the older male. “Hey, Seongwoo-ya,” he said, and Seongwoo seemed not to mind. Previously during on an interview, he had said that he won’t let another boys called him without proper honourifics. Yet he let Daniel called his name intimately; something that blurted by the younger male after mustered all the courage he own. He called him using _Seongwoo-ya_ while they were joking around on the practice room, then immediately frowned and apologized. He was testing the water, and made an internal fist pump as Seongwoo just smiled and said: _Oh, it’s okay. You can call me Seongwoo, just like that._ It felt like a privilege, something special, something preserved only for him; because he do notice how Seongwoo corrected another younger contestant whom copied Daniel’s way for calling him and told him to call him using the proper honourifics.

 

“Are you ready?”

 

Oh? Wait—they were sitting inside of a huge, white car. Seongwoo was wearing a white buttoned up shirt, smiling at him, hands on the steering wheel, “Where should we go…?”

_Ah,_ Daniel thought to himself, _This is a dream. I get it._

 

“Let’s go to Gapyeong,” He said then, remembered that during the WANNA ONE GO season one, they went to Gapyeong’s mountain and ate on a nice bistro on the cliff area. “Okay,” There were sparkles on Seongwoo’s eyes when he was looking at Daniel, “Let’s go then…!”

 

The scenery outside the windows were amazing: trees and rows of green foliage. The mountain air felt fresh, carried the scent of pines and cedar. They sing along the song played from Daniel’s playlist. Daniel fed some snacks to the older male, content that everything felt perfect. Seongwoo parked the car and they entered the restaurant, the maître d’ ushered them inside.

 

“They said Gapyeong is a destination for lovers,” He teased while they were seated on the cabin area, and Seongwoo smiled back at him, “And aren’t we a couple then?”

 

A couple. 

It sounded amazing, wonderful. Daniel took Seongwoo’s hands, carresed every single nook and cranny—as if he wanted to memorize the latter’s hand just by touch. “Seongwoo-ya,” His eyes stared straight onto Seongwoo’s dark eyes, “Spend this lifetime with me.”

 

“Oh?” Seongwoo was rather amused, “A lifetime is a really long time, Niel-ah.”

 

“I’m afraid that even a lifetime won’t be enough for me to love you,” Daniel found Seongwoo’s ring finger and traced a circle there, “That’s why I asked for this lifetime, so I could convince you to spend another lifetime with me afterwards.”

 

“You sounded so confident,” Seongwoo sighed, “But human’s heart was something fickle. How could you be so sure about us? I may not be the perfect person for you.”

 

“I just know,” Daniel replied, “And you don’t have to be perfect. I’m not loving you because you are perfect—I love you for who you are.”

 

_So love me back and be mine…_

 

* * *

 

The alarm’s blarring sound pierced his ears, and Daniel woke up immediately—startled by the loud sirene noise. Beside him, Seongwoo hurriedly wake up and grabbed the alarm clock; cursed as he saw the time, then threw the poor rooster shaped clock after turned off the alarm. “Shit, I’m late…!!”

 

It was chaos in the morning. The actor prepared himself in a rush, came out from the bathroom minutes later, hair still dripping wet. He fumbled with his backpack, and Daniel approached him—took the towel and tried his best to help Seongwoo dried his hair. The older male was wearing a new set of black shirt and a dark denim. He shoved his wallet and keys and script inside his bag, answering Jihyo Noona’s call with a frantic “I know, I know, I’m headed down now…!” 

 

Daniel couldn’t get a chance to talk or interrupt. Seongwoo took his distressed blue denim jacket from the hanger, and shoved his feet on his shoes. “Niel-ah…!” He practically shout, “Sorry, I need to go now. But we need to talk, so let’s meet later okay!”

 

The front door closed before Daniel even replied. Seongwoo went like a whirlwind, and Daniel just hopelessly smiled, still holding Seongwoo’s wet towel in his hand. He was wondering about the things Seongwoo wanted to talk with him, and frowned as he considered a possibility about Seongwoo wanted to reject his further advances and make sure he would consider the kiss last night was never happened.

 

Daniel didn’t have any schedule today, and Youngsik Hyung knew that he was staying at Seongwoo’s place, so he took his sweet time. He tidied Seongwoo’s bed, headed to the bathroom afterwards. Daniel remembered how Seongwoo kept a lot of his clothes in his place, so he didn’t bring much in the first place. His travelling bag was filled with snacks and cans of beers, along with his showering necessities—he hated to use the shampoo on Seongwoo’s place, because even it was the same brand he was currently using, it was a reminder of Seongwoo’s mysterious lover.

 

Daniel wondered if Seongwoo cried because of that mysterious person. Did they have a fight? Or did they break up? Maybe that’s why Seongwoo lamented and cried aguishly like that. Daniel stepped out from the shower, flushed from both the hot water and overthinking. He went to the drawer where Seongwoo kept his stuffs and rummaged for a suitable shirt. He wore the white shirt with an abstract doodle since it looked comfy; and just as he closed the drawer, something fell from the top of the cabinet.

 

“Oops,” Daniel crouched down and took the velvet box. Holding the box, he felt an uncertain feeling. It looked harmless, but it was a jewerly box—and there was never something casual related to a jewerly box, especially if Seongwoo treated like it was something important. There was a heavy feeling pooled inside his stomach, and Daniel held his breath and opened the box.

 

Inside, there were a pair of rings—blue green gems gleamed under the sun, with a mobious symbol of eternity carved inside.

 

 

* * *

 

 

**BONUS**

_Link source:[here](https://twitter.com/plain_nielong/status/1038405223599886336)._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone know the movie?  
> It's a real movie, just in case you guys are wondering (and a great one, go watch it~!)


	11. I wish that you’re here with me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel remembered the set of mugs. The plates. The utensils. He remembered the toothbrush and the shampoo. His hands trembled as he slowly closed the velvet box. He felt like fainting—the dizzy spell was strong against him. He wanted to crouch; he need to put his head low between his legs and regulated his breaths. His own heartbeats drummed against his ribcages, and it was loud even to his own ears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday morning~!!  
> Here's another chapter to start your weekend :D

 

* * *

 

_These wasn’t any ordinary rings._

It was the first thought popped out inside Daniel’s mind. The rings were made from platinum, the gems were absolutely beautiful, and the setting was perfect. It was hard to see that the gems inlaid on the rings were made from two different gems, since the cuts fitted each other like puzzle pieces. Someone with these kinds of rings was obviously serious; these rings were a set of proposal rings—they screamed _destiny_ along with _soulmate_.

 

All of the sudden, Daniel didn’t know what to do. He felt like an intruder, a third unwanted party. It felt like he was forcing Seongwoo, when the older male was weak and vulnerable. Seongwoo obviously loves the said lover. He cherished everythingrelated to this mysterious person dear—the latter might not realized it, but those small knick-knacks scattered around said otherwise.

 

Daniel remembered the set of mugs. The plates. The utensils. He remembered the toothbrush and the shampoo. His hands trembled as he slowly closed the velvet box. He felt like fainting—the dizzy spell was strong against him. He wanted to crouch; he need to put his head low between his legs and regulated his breaths. His own heartbeats drummed against his ribcages, and it was loud even to his own ears.

 

Daniel felt helpless.

 

_Do I have a chance at all, Seongwoo-ya…?_

_What am I to you…?_

 

* * *

Seongwoo looked a lot better, unlike the day before.

Jihyo noticed that Seongwoo’s complexion was actually fine despite the slightly red, swollen eyes. His expression was tender, yet hopeful. He seemed to be pleased about something. She didn’t want to nag about his eyes; those could be fixed with make up later. Seongwoo’s hair was still kinda wet, so Jihyo gave him a towel from the prepared bin and asked him to dry his hair properly. 

 

They were heading to a photoshoot for a magazine; Seongwoo was booked for the cover and special spreadsheet interview. The editor had given her the list of questions to be featured along as a quick interview, so Seongwoo just need to answer them. “Here,” she handed the ipad, the document had been opened, ready to filled in.

 

Seongwoo let the towel sit on his shoulder and took the ipad. Along with the cliche questions about his solo career and acting, there was a short list of 5 random questions, but they weren’t the ordinary textbook-standart questions. He took his time to read the questions properly before typed his anwers.

 

\---

**If you are a new addition to the crayon box, what color would you be and why?**

I might be black. I used a lot of black outfits, and they do said that I looked good in black. I do believe that it wasn’t the colour of my soul, though *laugh*

 

**If you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be and why?**

It’s a tough question. You guys sure knew that I once stated ‘seals’ and ‘squirrel’ for the answers, thus I got a battalion of seal plushies with my moles on their cheeks, but someone said that I really resembled a black cat.

 

**What’s your must-have jam song for a car drive?**

You guys might remember this song from my previous car drive during WANNA ONE era: I love Closers by The Chainsmokers ft. Halsey. It got a great beats and fun to sing along, despite the lyrics. I also like Lauv’s I Like Me Better. Please do try listen to them.

 

**What do you think about when you’re alone in your car?**

If I was alone, that means I’m the one driving. For sure I’ll focus on the road, but during traffic or red lights I might think about what should I eat later or if something during the trip inspired me for a new song. Mostly it was just random, mundane topics.

 

**What was the last gift you gave someone?**

It was quite a long while ago, but I bought a pair of coffee mugs. They are black and white with cats pattern. We decided to keep the mugs at my place, though. 

\---

 

Seongwoo gave back the ipad to Jihyo. His manager scanned his answers and raised one of her eyebrows. “The last answer…” She tapped the glassy surface of the device, “Will sure do ended in an uproar.” She didn’t demand the answer to be revised though. She knew the mugs; Seongwoo bought the couple mug for Daniel a while ago and they used it often. It came from a chainstores brand, and could be sought to be a potential new sponsor. Seongwoo’s answer would bring a lot of hype, since he hinted that he got special someone and they were so close that the gift receiver uses the item at Seongwoo’s place instead of the latter’s own place.

 

It wasn’t actually a lie since Jihyo knew the relationship between Youngsik’s artist with her actor—but the whole matter could be passed as publicity stunt. She made a mental note to contact the brand; if they could signed the deal before the magazine release date, the brand could do their own mug campaign right after. The brand was big enough to even sign Daniel along with Seongwoo, and Jihyo made another mental note to contact Youngsik about the matter. 

 

They reached the studio and Seongwoo was ushered to the make up area—the stylist gave him series of outfits and the make up artist didn’t complain when she saw Seongwoo’s eyes. Instead, she took an iced cool pack and ordered Seongwoo to compress his eyes while she worked on his hair. They gave him a vintage style with gentleman vibe, simple yet elegant.

 

They finished the photoshoot according to the schedule, and the editor promised him that he will send the copy of the magazine personally to Seongwoo before the edition hit the shelf. Seongwoo confirmed his schedule with Jihyo, and headed to his drama location next. The staffs greeted him and he greeted them back. They noticed that Seongwoo was in a really good mood today. Before he entered his changing room, Seongwoo told the scriptwriter and the director about Daniel’s okay for being cameo, and the staffs were absolutely ecstatic. Even if it was a brief several minutes scene, Kang Daniel would surely boost the rating up. Their current rating was great, and the prospect of it getting higher made them excited. 

 

“Sure,” The director grinned, “We’ll contact his manager about the cameo role.”

 

Maybe it was a mere coincidence, but Tae Woo’s scenes were finally gave him some fighting spirit. Hae In went to his office and met Tae Woo in the lobby. The girl looked really sorry, and tried to reasoned with her boyfriend about the last incident. Yet Tae Woo looked stoic, and in a fed up tone he asked, “Hae In…?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Do you ever…” Tae Woo tried to emphasized his question, “Do you ever, ever really love me—as in you really do love me and not just any pity? What am I to you, seriously?”

 

“Tae Woo…!”

 

“You know what, Hae In,” Tae Woo stared at her, eyes piercingly cold, “I’m tired of being your punching bag. I’m tired of being your second best. I didn’t want to be you safety spare anymore. I don’t need a relationship out of pity. I just want someone that love me back, someone whom appreciated me for being me.”

 

_I just want someone that love me back, someone whom appreciated me for being me._

 

It resonated well with Seongwoo; it felt like the dialogue spoke to him. It was his true wish: to have someone that love him back, accepted him just the way he is. Daniel does that, and Seongwoo was evaded him repeatedly because he was too afraid to be hurt. He ignored Daniel’s efforts and feelings, simply because he was being too preoccupied with his own negativities. Now that he realized that he was wrong and Daniel was all that he need, he feels liberated.

 

_I’ll tell him the truth._

_I’ll tell him about everything._

 

* * *

 

When his schedule ended, Seongwoo was really tired. It was around 10 PM when he entered his van, sleepy yet chipper from the overload of coffee. The caffeine crash won’t be pretty, but he registered that it was late anyway; it was better to just sleep after he reached home. 

 

He dozed off during the trip, and dragged himself up to the lift when the van reached his usual parking lot. Jihyo said her usual take care, and Seongwoo just nodded. His lights were off when he opened his door, and the apartment was empty. There were a churned feeling inside his stomach, but once again Daniel got his own activities and he didn’t promise to stay, to wait for Seongwoo to come back home. 

 

His apartment looked tidy and clean though, so Seongwoo wondered if Daniel cleaned up after he left this morning. The sink was spotless, the dishes were dried up and stored inside the cabinet. The trash bin was empty and filled with the new recycle bag, and there was a new post it pasted on the fridge: _I noticed the schedule on the wall, so I’m taking your trash downstairs._ Seongwoo smiled—memories or no memories, it seemed that Daniel still do the same thing. 

 

The younger male often helps him to collect the trash and deposited them on the designated spot: apparently _eomma_ trained him and it was one of Daniel’s house duties back there in Busan. He still does it sometimes during WANNA ONE era, but it was mostly Minhyun whom cleaned their dorm—the Pledis idol really do clean when he was bored without nothing to do. 

Seongwoo opened his fridge and took a bottle of mineral water. He twisted open the cap and chugged the water down. It felt nice, after a really long day. The raven haired threw himself to the couch, scrambled his pockets for his smartphone.

 

_Heyyy_ , he texted Daniel, _How’s your day?_

 

It took a while before Daniel replied his message. _Hectic,_ the younger typed, _I need to re-learn all my songs and the coreographies ;________;_

 

Seongwoo winced. Yeah, Daniel do mention about the company’s hush hush decision; the younger male need to re-learn everything and acted like he never lost his memories. Seongwoo was angry for his behalf; he felt that it was insanely inhuman to treat Daniel like that. But Daniel assured him that it was okay and he will try to do his best. Seongwoo sighed, sometimes Daniel was way too good-natured on several circumstances. But it was the part of his charms, and that’s why so many people like him: they saw something genuine inside him and couldn’t help to cheer along.

 

Originally, he wanted to meet with the younger male tonight and tell him everything—but Daniel must be tired and Seongwoo didn’t want to push the latter. _Well, there’s still tomorrow,_ he told himself as he typed his next message. _Have time 2morrow, Niel-ah?_

 

The read notification didn’t show up for quite a long time, and Seongwoo wondered if Daniel had fallen asleep. He waited for a minute, then typed another message. _Let’s meet. We need to talk._ “Wait, it sounded so… stern.” He sighed.

  
For a moment there, Seongwoo hesitated. His fingers were tapping the air. He deleted the message, typed _I have something to tell—_ but deleted the sentence again, leaving only the _Let’s meet_ part. He pressed the send button. 

 

_Have time 2morrow, Niel-ah?_

_Let’s meet._

 

The read notification was never appeared. Seongwoo glanced at the clock—the time showed that it passed the 11 PM, almost midnight. _Oh well._ Daniel must be tired and asleep already. Re-learning everything takes so many time and energy; Seongwoo somehow remembered their Produce 101 era at Paju’s English Village. Those times were tough and absolutely rough, no pun intended. 

 

Seongwoo sighed, went to the bathroom to wash his face, brush his teeth and took a quick wash up on the shower. He stumbled from the bathroom, wearing only his towel; pondering in front of his wardrobe cabinet. Should he wear another pyjamas or— He glanced to the side, his gaze stopped at one of Daniel’s clothing articles. Daniel put his shirt from the previous sleepover near the wicker basket, folded halfway, haven’t put into the laundry bin yet. 

 

The raven haired took it, hugged the material and Daniel’s scent was still there: smelled like the w.dressroom’s coconut cologne mixed with pine and cedar bodywash. Seongwoo held it tighter, buried his face onto the cotton fabric, wanted to cry again.

 

_I wish that you’re here with me._

_Stupid isn’t it?_

_I spent so many effort to push you away, and here am I at this moment: wishing you to be here by my side._

 

* * *

 

_Have time 2morrow, Niel-ah?_

_Let’s meet._

**_Seongwoo. 11:46 PM._ **

 

Daniel lied there on his bed, the bluish light from his screen demurely lit the dark bedroom. He stared at the pushed notifications, but he didn’t dare to open the chat. His whole body felt boneless—he was tired as he spent his all day to dance. He left Seongwoo’s apartment and went straight to MMO’s practice room after he called Youngsik Hyung to pick him up. His manager noticed his rather foul mood, but gave him the materials and gave Daniel the time and space he needed. 

 

Then he danced. 

He tried his best to watch the routines and learn every steps, danced and danced for hours. He exhausted his whole body and kept his mind busy by memorizing the choreographies—truthfully, he didn’t want to remember about Seongwoo’s mysterious lover… or those rings. 

 

He didn’t want to make a guess about that person, and he absolutely didn’t want to imagine them being intimate. He didn’t want to think about Seongwoo being touched by someone else; being hugged, and kissed, and cuddled—or even smiled and laughed with anybody else than himself. 

 

Daniel was disgusted with his own possessiveness; a mocking sound inside his head sneered at him: _What’s your right to be jealous? What’s your right to be upset? He’s not yours and you are nobody to him._ He hushed those thoughts and buried them away, and moved his body to the point of him being dizzy. 

 

But he keep dancing.

 

Now after the long hours, he was restless and exhausted, yet he was unable to sleep. His mind wandered to Seongwoo. Daniel sighed and closed his eyes. He saw Seongwoo’s image, smiling at him, eyes sparkles as those hand reached onto him, “Niel-ah.”—The older male’s voice was smooth and affectionate. Then he remembered how small and fragile Seongwoo was inside his embrace. He remembered the latter’s crying face. He remembered the older male’s sleeping face. He remembered how those fingers clutched at him, desperately. He remembered their kiss.

 

_What am I to you… Seongwoo-ya?_

 

His speaker was playing a new song from the playlist—the random song was unfamiliar, yet soulful and filled with melancholy. The female singer’s voice was haunting, as she poured her emotions into those lyrics.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _I want to know how long a meteor can fly for_

_Whether its beauty is worth looking for_

_Flowers in the night sky scatter and fall behind you_

_Making me happy for a long while_

_It’s worth waiting for ♪_ ♫♬

 

He loves Seongwoo. He was certain of it, and he told Jisung about it. His fellow MMO member didn’t urged him to back down or forbid him for harbouring feelings for Seongwoo. Jisung seemed supportive of his love.

 

Daniel wondered if Jisung knew who Seongwoo’s lover is. Maybe he was no good. Maybe that’s why the motherly Jisung supported his love and helped him to pursue the Fantagio actor. Daniel remembered Youngsik’s answer: _“I would check if her lover was worthy to stay by her side. It’s okay if she was happy and the lover is a great person, but if she wasn’t happy with the relationship… I will step up and pursue her.”_

 

He had decided to the same. So why’d he back down just because he saw a pair of rings? He hushed the voice sneered _but it’s_ _a pair of rings that Seongwoo cherished_ and exhaled a long breath.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _My heart rushes from dusk to early morning,_

_unable to bear it anymore_

_My feelings and hopes land in your hands_

_Sprouting into night’s rainbow_

_Morphing into the moonlight’s breeze,_

_into moonlight’s breeze ♪_ ♫♬

 

Daniel pushed a button on his smartphone, and the device litted up; the bluish light from the screen felt bright and taunting. He tapped on the notifications and entered the chatroom. Seongwoo hadn’t send another message yet. Daniel re-read the message.

 

_Have time 2morrow, Niel-ah?_

_Let’s meet._

**_Seongwoo. 11:46 PM._ **

 

So he typed his response and sent it immediately: _Sure._

 

* * *

 

_Sure._

**_Daniel. 00:18 AM._ **

 

Daniel’s reply was the first thing he read after he wake up and turned off his morning alarm the next day. Seongwoo saw the four letters word and smiled. It felt like a wonderful start for his day. The morning’s sunshine was bright and golden, painted the whole room with a soft glow as his white curtain filtered most of the summer’s sun.

 

_Good morning_ , Seongwoo sent along a cute character sticker with the message, _How’s your sleep last night?_ His fingers danced on the virtual keyboard, continued: _Sorry, I just read your message. What time you’ll be free today? I got a show recording this morning, but I’ll be free after 2. Should we have a late lunch?_

 

He felt like a teenager boy all over again, texting his crush, bombarded the chatroom with messages after messages. When Daniel’s reply popped up a few seconds later, Seongwoo’s smile went wider.

 

_Morning, Hyung._

_Sure, I’ll practice in the morning then._

_Do you want to eat somewhere or should we order some delivery?_

**_Daniel. 07:35 AM._ **

 

Seongwoo thought for a second, then replied: _Let’s order something. What do you want to eat?_ An immediate answer popped up: … _meat?_ and Seongwoo laughed. Daniel really like meat. However it was better to eat it fresh while it was piping hot, fresh from the pan. Seongwoo wondered if he should order for some cubed saikoro beef instead, so they could fry-panned the meat by themselves.

 

He typed his reply: _Okay. My place then?_

 

_Roger. Will be there around 2.30ish._

**_Daniel. 07:38 AM._ **

 

_See you later then, Niel-ah. I’ll notify you after the shooting was done._

**_Seongwoo. 07:39 AM._ **

 

_OK :) Have a nice day, Hyung!_

**_Daniel. 07:39 AM._ **

 

* * *

 

At the MMO dorm, Jisung was making a simple morning sandwich with toasted bread and spreaded jam when Daniel went out from his bedroom. “Morning,” He greeted while pouring his soy banana milk from the tertapack carton to his glass. Daniel yawned and scratched his stomach, “Morning, Hyung.”

 

“Want some?” Jisung pushed the bread tray, and Daniel nodded. He took a slice, put some marmalade jam on it, then ate it in several big bites. He was careful not to leave any crumbles though, because Jisung’s scolding was even worse from his real mother if he ate like an uncivilized person in front of the older male.

 

“Niel-ah,” Jisung put down his phone and Daniel didn’t like the tone of his voice. Whenever Jisung used that serious tone, it usually something important or somekind of lecture, so he braced himself, “Yeah, Hyung?”

 

“So I’ve talked with the kids… another WANNA ONE members, I mean,” Jisung paused, “Well, they knew about your amnesia and they were worried about you. In the beginning they wanted to see you immediately but some of them got a really tight schedule and… well, let’s say me and Seongwoo asked them to give you some time to adjust yourself. They agreed—but they still worried about you.”

 

“Mmm,” Daniel’s mouth was full with the sandwich, so his reply was rather muffled. He washed down his sandwich with some milk, then he repeated, “I see.”

 

“They asked if you could participate back to the group chat, for the very least. They wanted to meet up, but it was kinda hard to found a free day that fitted everyone’s schedule for the time being.”

 

Truthfully, it was a daunting thing for Daniel; he haven’t contacted anyone else up to this moment except Jisung, Seongwoo and Youngsik. Oh, and Jihyo. But other than those certain people, he hadn’t contacted anybody else than replying their concerned message after his accident. He was told to keep amnesia a secret now, and he didn’t want to slip. But since WANNA ONE members already knew about his case, maybe Daniel could be more relaxed. After all they were close before… right? So hopefully it wouldn’t be awkward if he truthfully said if he didn’t remember any of them and those moments he spent with them before. Getting in touch with other members hopefully jogged his memories as well. Daniel tapped his empty glass, “Okay.”

 

“Any plan for today?” Jisung took their empty plates to the sink. Daniel gave his emptied glass as well, “Practice in the morning, then I’ll have late lunch with Seongwoo Hyung.”

 

“Okay, send my regards then,” Jisung smiled, “Have fun. There’s another show recording today, so I’ll be back late.”

 

Youngsik came to pick up Jisung after that, so the older MMO member bid him farewell. Daniel waved back, the question about Seongwoo’s lover got stuck on his tongue. _Ah well, I could ask Jisung later._

 

Just before the door closed, Youngsik held the door. “Oh, almost forgot—“ His head popped from behind the door, “The Summer Constellation’s director contacted me yesterday night. He offered a cameo role to the drama.”

 

“Oh, I do tell Seongwoo about it,” Daniel beamed, “It’s okay, I’ll do it as long as my character got any scene with Tae Woo’s character.” _So I could act with Seongwoo Hyung again._ Youngsik nodded, “Got it. I’ll reply and send the contract agreement afterwards.”

 

* * *

 

**[Naver] Kang Daniel Will Appeared as Cameo on Ong Seongwoo’s Current Drama?**

Hot rumours about Kang Daniel would appeared as cameo on his fellow ex-WANNA ONE member Ong Seongwoo current drama, The Summer’s Constellation, started trending a few days ago. Apparently previously during that time the rumours bombarded the internet, there wasn’t such planning about any cameo role—but now the drama’s director, Ahn Yi Suk opened up about the topic.

 

**Also see:** **Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo Acted as ‘Cha’ Brothers on WANNA ONE’S Beautiful MV**

 

“Kang Daniel-ssi heard the rumour from Ong Seongwoo-ssi and told him that he didn’t mind to act as a cameo,” Ahn Yi Suk stated, “So I contacted his management a while ago. He was really busy, so I hope his schedule could fit into the production.”

 

Kang Daniel’s summarized schedule could be seen on  MMO’s website and  it was super packed as hell . Before the company gave him a break after  his incident that caused him hospitalized, but the revised schedule was uploaded two days ago and he would soon back to the business. For the time being, the netizen had imagines  possible cameo roles for Kang Daniel’s participation for The Summer’s Constellation drama. 

 

**Related Articles:**

Netizen Listed Possible Character Role for Kang Daniel’s Cameo Role on The Summer’s Constellation

Are You #TeamTaeWoo or #TeamSeoJun?

Tae Woo's Fans were Furious to Hae In’s Betrayal

 

* * *

 

It was an hour after midday when Daniel sitting down after his rigorous practice session. The speaker was still playing the song in loop; he finally memorized the steps already. He need to cool down before taking his shower—he promised to meet Seongwoo around 2.30ish and he didn’t want to be late. 

 

Now as his muscles still burning from hours of practice, Daniel leaned on the pillar, chugged down his water, then took his smartphone from his small duffel bag. He remembered what Jisung said to him this morning, and he was still giddy since he was so nervous about joining back the chatroom. 

 

The chatroom name was **“ALL I WANNA DO WANNA ONE”** , following their group greeting signature. His nickname for the chat was Nielie. He was hesitated for a while, then he typed: _Hey guys._ Immediately, someone nicknamed Sparrow joined the chat and replied with full capital letters.

 

**Sparrow:** OMG YOU ARE FINALLY HERE

**Sparrow:** WELCOME BACK NIEL HYUNG

 

Daniel sent a sticker emoticon of a cartoonish “WASSUP” followed by “Thanks Woojin.” His reply was replied with more and more reply from another members; the reply was stacked so fast Daniel need to scrolled up to read them all.

 

**DarkBae:** Wait Hyung

**DarkBae:** You remembered Woojin?

**DarkBae:** *??? sticker emoticon*

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Are you really got amnesia, Hyung?

**CutiePieDaehwi:** *cartoonish detective sticker emoticon*

 

**Minhyunie:** Or have you got your memories back already?

 

**Nielie:** Um

**Nielie:** Sorry guys

**Nielie:** I really forgot about everything

**Nielie:** I don’t really remember everyone

**Nielie:** I do googling everything happened during the last three years

**Nielie:** But yeah, amnesia is real

 

**ManduCheeks:** So you got no memories at all about us, Niel?

**ManduCheeks:** *aigoo sticker emoticon*

 

**FightMe:** Anything at all, Hyung?

 

**Nielie:** I do get some flashback sometimes

**Nielie:** They were sudden and random

**Nielie:** I read and watched about WANNA ONE so I got all the gist

**Nielie:** But I don’t remember much.

 

**GulliverMaknae:** What are you doing these days, Hyung? 

**GulliverMaknae:** Are you still go to the hospital?

 

**Nielie:** I’ll need to visit from time to time in the future

**Nielie:** But not today

 

**CloudFairy:** So what are you doing today?

**CloudFairy:** *? sticker emoticon*

 

**Nielie:** I need to re-learn everything, so I practiced my coreographies

 

**FightMe:** OMG Hyung

**FightMe:** They didn’t give you breaks 

**FightMe:**???!!!

**FightMe:** *shocked sticker emoticon*

 

**Nielie:** They kinda…did?

**Nielie:** My schedule supposed to be packed

**Nielie:** I’ll visit Seongwoo’s place after this tho

 

**Eomma:** Ah yes, the late lunch

**Eomma:** *italian chef thumbsup sticker emoticon*

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** *whistle sticker emoticon*

**CutiePieDaehwi:** OMG LOLLLLL

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Of course

 

**ManduCheeks:** Seongwoo always his favorite eh

**ManduCheeks:** LOLZ

 

The other members replied so fast—Daniel was a little bit overwhelmed. He was still guessing who is who; other than members that got their names on the nickname, he need to guess who was the particular member since not all of them got their own face as the profile picture.

 

‘Sparrow’ was easy—Daniel remembered about the article comparing the Busan youth with chirping sparrow. Jinyoung, Daehwi and Minhyun got their name there. ‘Mandu Cheeks’ must be Jaehwan, ’Eomma’ must be Jisung, ‘Cloud Fairy’ must be Sungwoon, ‘Gulliver Maknae’ must be Guanlin, and by the profile picture ‘Fight Me’ must be Jihoon. 

 

Then there was the last nickname, whom didn’t participate at the chat. Daniel’s eyes widened as his heart thumped loudly. He saw the nickname, and the photo was definitely Seongwoo’s latest selfie he posted on the fancafe.

 

Seongwoo’s nickname was ‘Black Cat’.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....anyone know the song played during Daniel's night texting scene? ;)
> 
> hint: it's a cover and the lyrics were changed from the original's lyrics


	12. It was you all along

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The locked folder was still there, the black cat emoji seemed like smiling smugly towards him.  
> Daniel tapped the folder, the popped up password box appeared on the middle of his screen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning, lovelies~!  
> It's Monday morning, and here's the chapter update for the week :D
> 
> P.S. You might wanna eat this while eating something LOLZ

* * *

 

Daniel held his breath. He didn’t opened the chatroom before, so he never notice. The nickname on the screen stared back at him—Seongwoo’s smile on the profile picture felt like somewhat a sign. His heartbeats were loud, drummed against his ribcages; Daniel felt his hand trembled. It felt like a panic attack, fortunately he still could breathe—eventhough they were short and ragged.

 

**Nielie:** Oh? 

**Nielie:** Seongwoo’s nickname is Black Cat?

 

He tried to make it casual—unimportant. Yet the anticipation was killing him. It felt like an eternity before the replies popped up, answering his question.

 

**ManduCheeks:** Yep, duh

**ManduCheeks:** *rolleyes sticker emoticon*

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** *correct sticker emoticon*

**CutiePieDaehwi:** You are the one whom gave him the nickname, Hyung

 

**GulliverMaknae:** You are the one typed the nickname using his phone, Niel Hyung

 

**Minhyunie:** And you asked him to not changing the nickname because it fits him so much, you said

 

**FightMe:** Since the P101 era, wasn’t it?

 

**Sparrow:** Yep

**Sparrow:** You declared that he behaves like a cat

**Sparrow:** And since Seongwoo Hyung always wears black

**Sparrow:** You said that he’s like a black cat

**Sparrow:** *black cat sticker emoticon*

 

Daniel gulped.

He exited the chatroom and went to his gallery folder. The locked folder was still there, the black cat emoji seemed like smiling smugly towards him. Daniel tapped the folder, the popped up password box appeared on the middle of his screen. First, he tried to enter Seongwoo’s name.

 

Ong Seongwoo.

 

ERROR.

Incorrect Password. 

 

“Mmmm,” Daniel tried again. This time he didn’t put the family name.

 

ERROR.

Incorrect Password. 

 

It was still uncorrect. “Is it not a letter, but numbers…?” Slowly, he typed the latter’s birthday: 250895.

 

ERROR.

Incorrect Password.

 

Daniel exhaled a long breath—his fingertips felt numb. Yet he typed another password, his fingers trembled: 25081995. It felt like forever, but the buffer sign showed up, along with the loading bar. Seconds later, the app showed him the folder’s contents.

 

It was rows and rows of Seongwoo’s picture. 

Sometimes it got the two of them, both a decent photo taken by someone else and the more personal selfies. In each photos, they looked happy; with smiles and laughs plastered on their face. There were lots and LOTS of Seongwoo’s photos—some of them were taking candidly, some got the older male’s attention and he was smiling beautifully to Daniel. Those sparkles on Seongwoo’s eyes gave Daniel a tingle, a shiver. There was a sudden knot on his stomach.

 

_So it was you, Hyung._

_It was you all along._

 

* * *

 

The show recording was ended rather early. 

Seongwoo was one of the MCs—and since they had been working for quite a while before on another music show, he and Mark did a really good job collaborating their banter, done everything in mostly one take shoot. The interviews with the idol groups were scheduled to be recorded instead of live, so he could leave the studio earlier than his usual schedule.

 

“You are spending a lot of time with Daniel Hyung lately,” Mark commented as they went back to their changing room. The NCT member was familiar with Daniel as well since they joined the same variety show before, and this young boy really love to tease Seongwoo about his relationship with Daniel.

 

Instead of replying, Seongwoo made a smug expression; Mark immediately replied with a heartbroken act, crouching while fakely agonizing. “My eyes…! Duh, I was blinded by the brilliant light from the power of love—!” Seongwoo slapped his shoulder, “Ya—!”

 

“Sorry, cannot help that,” Mark laughed. He and Daniel really love to laugh—and both took their laugh to the extreme. Seongwoo was amused by how easy these two to be humoured, he swore they often laugh even for the smallest matter.

 

Seongwoo changed his outfits, but didn’t erase his make up. His current make up look was natural enough and he was simply lazy to erase it. Lately, he was spending time barefaced with Daniel—he wanted to show the latter his dolled up version. 

 

“Do you wanna go and grab something to eat, Hyung?” Mark asked, and Seongwoo need to decline. “Sorry Mark,” He apologized, “I already have a lunch appointment.”

 

“Where’d you go? Can I tag along—“ Mark asked, then paused. His brows furrowed, “It’s a lunch date, isn’t it?”

 

“You my dear friend, was absolutely correct,” Seongwoo made the smug face again, “A nice lunch for two.”

 

“I knew it, you two lovey dovey stupid couple,” Mark pretended to pout. “Okay, say hi from me to Daniel Hyung. Have fun, you guys.”

 

“Thanks Mark~!”

 

“But seriously though, let’s have meal together sometimes. I miss hanging out with you two.”

 

* * *

 

It was a little bit after 2 when Seongwoo reached home. He managed to visit his usual meat vendor, bought the cubed saikoro beef along with some fresh thyme and rosemary. It was a little bit much, but he bought the portion for four. Daniel usually eat a lot, and whatever remained could be stored in the fridge for later. Seongwoo planned to pan fried the steaks with Daniel, so what he had to do was just marinated it with salt, pepper and some dried herbs. The younger male used to work at the BBQ place, so he was a lot better grilling meats than him. It was also Daniel whom told him about the recipe, and they usually made it from time to time. Seongwoo put all of the ingredients in the big glass pan, then put it aside on the kitchen counter.

 

He then proceed to wash some rice, rinse it with water for a couple of times before put it on the rice cooker, add some water as needed, then push the cook button. Usually steaks were eaten along with potatoes and western salad, but they were Korean and whenever he ate the cubed steak with Daniel, they will eat it with a bowl of rice and some spinach salad. Seongwoo had made the dish quite a few times he would automatically make the seasoned salad.

 

He washed, boiled and blanched the baby spinach he got on his fridge. After a few moments he drained it and transferred the spinach into the mixing bowl. His seasonings should be sufficient: green onions, soy sauce, sesame oil and sesame seeds, along with some garlic he kept in a glass jar. 

 

“Should I made something else…?” He wondered, but he was kinda lazy to cook something else. Daniel usually bring something as well, so maybe his preparation was enough. If it was needed, they always could order some deliveries as well.

 

As it was on cue, his phone dinged. Seongwoo took his phone, message notifications popped up and he tapped open immediately.

 

_Almost there._

**_Daniel. 02:20 PM._ **

 

_Okay. Just come right up._

**_Seongwoo. 02:20 PM._ **

 

_I’m super hungry after practice TT_____TT_

_What’s our lunch?_

**_Daniel. 02:20 PM._ **

 

_Meat._

_Just like you requested._

_You always love beef, so~_

**_Seongwoo. 02:21 PM._ **

 

_WOHOOOOOOO!!!_

_I LOVE YOU SEONGWOO HYUNG_

**_Daniel. 02:21 PM._ **

 

_We’ll need to sear it ourselves tho_

**_Seongwoo. 02:22 PM._ **

 

_It’s okay, it was better to eat it hot while it was fresh from the grill_

_Wait_

_Should I stop a lil bit to buy some wine?_

**_Daniel. 02:22 PM._ **

 

_No need_

_I have a bottle of Merlot here_

**_Seongwoo. 02:22 PM._ **

 

_Wow Hyung_

_You are sure prepared_

**_Daniel. 02:23 PM._ **

 

_Always ;)_

**_Seongwoo 02:23 PM._ **

 

A few minutes later, Daniel ringed the front door. Seongwoo buzzed him in, “Do you really need to ring the bell? You know the passcode, Niel-ah.” The younger male grinned while he settled his bags down, “Well, I thought it will be more polite to do so.”

 

“Rubbish,” Seongwoo threw the napkin at him, “Last time you just punched the code and entered by yourself. Like you usually did.”

 

It was a slip of tongue, but Daniel didn’t get the hint. He just laughed and evaded the napkin. He caught the white with blue line accents cloth midair before it reached the floor, and put it on his left shoulder.

 

“Okay then,” He approached the kitchen area, “What should I do?”

 

“Pan-fried the steak, please. I had marinated it for a while. The garlic is over there,” Seongwoo pointed on the cubed steaks and took the blanched baby spinach, “I’ll make prepare the spinach salad.”

 

“Spinach salad—?” Daniel looked confused for a while, and Seongwoo paused. “Ah,” Seongwoo tried to smile, “Usually we ate it with rice and spinach salad, so I assumed—“ His words died down, and Daniel immediately took the steak’s glass pan. “No, no—Sorry Hyung…!” Daniel apologized, “Please, don’t be upset. I didn’t know about our usual way to eat the steak… My bad, really! I didn’t mind, I just kinda… new with all of these. I also have no idea about the steak’s recipe.”

 

“…well, it’s okay,” Seongwoo gave him a hesitant reply, “I also apologized to assumed that you’re remembering the recipe. Well, you are the one taught me about the steak recipe. You said that you learned it during your part time job before. And that’s way before Produce 101 era, I thought you remembered those time period.”

 

“I don’t tho—?” Daniel still looked confused, “Yes, I did the part time job before, but it was a Korean BBQ and my job was helping to grill— OH”

 

“Oh?”

 

Daniel blushed, “It’s my own assumption… but…”

 

“But?” Seongwoo urged him to explain further. Daniel sighed, “Well I know myself, so based on my own usual behavior… I might learned the recipe to impress you and lied about it, toned it down as something I learn from my past part time job.”

 

“Why’d you do that—?”

 

“Um,” Daniel fidgeted, “Coz learning a new specific recipe as something to impress… was… kinda desperate. And I don’t want to let you think that I was so desperate to get your approval. But yeah, now you know.”

 

Seongwoo laughed, so hard that his tears came out. “Oh Niel,” He held his stomach, “Actually I won’t judge you like that.”

 

“You still laughed,” Daniel pointed out. Seongwoo tried to stop his own laugh, “Yeah, but not because you learn the recipe. It’s more like the way you admitted it to me now, after all those years.”

 

“So um…” Daniel was still holding the dish pan, “…tell me again how to cook the steak—?”

 

Seongwoo took the pan and the meat tong, approached Daniel and gave the pan. “Here,” Daniel took it, and as he placed it onto the stove, Seongwoo turned on the exhaust fan and drizzled some olive oil to the pan. 

 

“Turn the stove to medium heat,” He guided, and Daniel complied. Seongwoo gave the meat tongs to Daniel, “Now it was heating up, put some of these…” He let Daniel put the steaks onto the pan. The sizzling sound was so satisfying, and the aroma was already tempting. “Now put these,” Seongwoo gave Daniel the thyme and the rosemary, some unsalted cubed butter along with some sliced garlic from the jar. Being prepped like that, it was easier to cook since he didn’t need to peel and slice everytime he need some garlic. 

 

“Don’t rush,” Seongwoo guided him more, “Here, use the spoon to pour the butter over the meat.” Daniel followed, basting the meat as instructed. He waited for a while before flipping the steaks until one side of it turned brown, repeating the steps.

 

“Good,” Seongwoo nodded, “When it looked like it’s done, just put them on the plates. It was on the cabinet over there.” He washed his hands, dried them, then he took the spinach and mixed it with the seasonings. He mixed it on the mixing bowl; then as he glanced sideways, he noticed Daniel stole a glance of him from time to time.

 

“What?” He asked, amused as he tried not to grin. Daniel was embarrassed as he got caught, 

“Um— It’s just…”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Your hands looked really pretty while you’re mixing the spinach,” Daniel admitted, and Seongwoo bursted into laughing fit a moment later. Daniel looked confused, “Eeeh why are you laughing, I’m not kidding Hyung…!!”

 

“I know,” Seongwoo took the side dish plates and put the spinach there, “It’s just… You reminded me to a show we attended before, the one with Dony and Cony Sunbae. I mixed the spinach salad there, because they stated that I was a man that so handsome even when I mixed the spinach salad.”

 

“…Weekly Idol?” Daniel asked, and Seongwoo shook his head, “No, it was their newer show. They quitted the Weekly Idol and host the Idol Room instead. WANNA ONE was the guests for their first episode.”

 

“Wow, we did?!”

 

“You were the one suggested that silly pose.”

 

“What pose—?”

 

“Well,” Seongwoo held his laugh, “Turned off the stove and put them on the plates. I’ll show you the video while we eat later.”

 

So after the dishes were done, they put the plate on the same wooden table they used before. The steak was still piping hot and the aroma was absolutely amazing. “Eat it,” Seongwoo gave the bowl of rice to Daniel. The younger male took a piece of the medium rare steaks, the meat was so fragrant and juicy. The butter and the herb infused well with the beef, gave it a really nice aroma and taste. Daniel hummed in approval, took a bite of another cubed steaks, this time ate it along with a mouthful of rice. Seongwoo was using several type of rice grains, mixed it with beans and barley as well—the non-usual ordinary white rice added a really nice texture.

 

Daniel looked in an absolutely bliss, and Seongwoo smiled from the sight. “Is it good?” He asked, and Daniel nodded eagerly, “This is so good! It’s like I died and went to heaven…!”

 

“Don’t die first,” Seongwoo chuckled, “You are still young. And your fans would be sad.”

 

“Would you be sad as well, Hyung?” Daniel took some of the spinach—Gosh, it was perfectly seasoned. This lunch was really the best. In front of him, Seongwoo reached for Daniel’s face, wiped a rice grain from the corner of his mouth and ate it, “No, I won’t”

 

Eventhough Daniel’s heart just thumped so loudly for Seongwoo’s earlier gesture, he tried to acted childish instead. “Eeeeh,” He whined, “Why not?”

 

“I would be angry at you instead,” Seongwoo ate his own meal, answering after he finished chewing, “How could you dare to die first and leave me behind. Unforgiveable.”

 

Daniel blushed, and he was actually happy to hear Seongwoo’s reply. It sounded kinda… intimate. Like a banter between lovers, That cheesy lines filled with saccharine dose of sweetness, as if Seongwoo was the spoiled lover demanded his lover to stay by his side, always. 

 

As promised though, Seongwoo showed Daniel the Idol Room’s first episode on his phone. It was hillarious, and Daniel finally understand what Seongwoo’s meant that he was the one suggesting the silly pose. They reached on the part when Seongwoo seasoned the spinach, the gestures were so provocative—even their maknae members winced after witnessed Seongwoo’s scandalous expression. Daniel was laughing non-stop, he put down his glass of Merlot on the table as he was swinging the red wine rather wildly as his whole body shook from the laughter. He crouched and held his stomach, it was cramping up due excessive laughter. 

 

“Seriously, my cheeks and stomach hurts…!” Daniel tapped the carpet, still tried his best to stop laughing.

 

“The just stop laughing…!” Seongwoo pretended to pout, and Daniel bursted into another series of laugh as he found the older male’s face expression was really funny.

 

When they finished the whole meal and the Merlot wine bottle almost empty, they tidied up the dishes. This time, Seongwoo didn’t object when Daniel took the dirty dishes to the sink. He let Daniel washed the plates and the cooking utensils as he wiped the table before folding it back and stored it on the cabinet.

 

Finished his task, Seongwoo went to the kitchen as well. Without saying anything, he took the drying napkin and took the dishes that had been washed by Daniel. He dried them and stacked them neatly before he stored them on the overhead cabinet. They worked in silence, accompanied by the song played from Seongwoo’s spotify playlist—Seongwoo’s small portable speaker was placed on the kitchen island.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _I can hear nothing_

_Because of this moment_

_Because of your presence_

_I now know those days were possible_

_I love this moment ♪_ ♫♬

 

Daniel knew the song. He saw Seongwoo sang the song before, during an event. It was a rather blurry video captured by their fans, but Seongwoo’s voice was clear and melodious despite the bad quality of the video.

 

Daniel passed the last piece of the dishes, the iron skillet, and for a brief moment their hands touched each other. Both him and Seongwoo froze, held their breath as their eyes locked on each other.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _You stayed by me_

_I love this moment_

_The moment I'm holding your hands ♪_ ♫♬

 

Seongwoo’s lips quivered, and Daniel let his grip go. The older male took the plate and wiped it dry. Seongwoo put it on the pan hanging rack, slowly put down the napkin down. He was standing there beside Daniel, awkwardly evaded the younger’s gaze. Seongwoo shifted his weight from one leg to the other, didn’t know how to start his confession.

 

“Hyung?”

 

The ‘hyung’ honorifics still stabbed Seongwoo’s heart everytime, but he didn’t say anything. He replied with a soft face, “Yeah?”

 

“You said that you have something to talk about,” Daniel reminded him, “Do you have something to tell?”

“I do,” Seongwoo tried not to run away again. _I must face these all. I need to confess. I need to tell him the truth._ It was scary and hard for him to speak—his fear creeped out, came back and torturing him. Thousands of _what if_ replayed their scenario inside his head. Seongwoo feared for the worst; but as he saw those straight and devout gaze on Daniel’s eyes, he steadied his heart.

 

Seongwoo approached his drawer, “I have something to show you—“

 

Then he paused.

His blood ran cold and for a second he thought he must misplaced it. He rushed and checked the drawers, every nook and cranny. His breath went frantic as he panicked, his mind felt blank and Seongwoo was filled with self-loathe.

 

“Hyung…?!” Daniel was confused with the older male’s reaction. Seongwoo ignored him, rechecked the cabinet, opened the drawer and poured the contents on the floor. He tried to find something, and it seemed that it wasn’t there as he darted into his bedroom and did the same with the small cabinets beside his bed.

 

“Hyung…!” Daniel chased him. At this point, Seongwoo was on the verge of tears. He almost broke down. The actor curled into a ball and his breaths went shallow; he was wheezing, his body was drenched in cold sweats. It was absolutely horrible to watch, Daniel rushed to his side and half-hugged Seongwoo—the older male looked so pale. The onyx coloured orbs in his eyes looked empty and hollow as Seongwoo heaved, “I lost it.”

 

“What—?” Daniel was horrified, “What is it, Hyung? What happened?”

 

“I lost it…!” Seongwoo rambled as he absolutely panicked. His whole body trembled and Daniel force-hugged him, “Hyung, calm down!”

 

“No…!” Seongwoo’s tears rolled down, “I can’t—“ 

 

_“Seongwoo-ya…!” Daniel held him, tight. The older male cried inside his embrace, Daniel’s shirt was a mess as Seongwoo buried his face on the material. It was another panic attack, and Seongwoo broke down. The attacks were always sudden and random, sometimes triggered by small, petty matters. It was hard for Daniel to see Seongwoo so devastated._

 

_“It’s okay,” He patted the latter’s back. Seongwoo still shivered, trembled as he was shaking rather violently. Daniel was afraid if the latter could ended up in seizures, “It’s okay, Seongwoo-ya. I’m here. I’m with you.”_

 

Daniel blinked. 

Seongwoo was still there, inside his embrace. The latter’s face was pale, his eyes were bloodshot and filled with tears. Daniel tightened his embrace. “Calm down, calm down… Seongwoo-ya,” His change of addressing the latter caught Seongwoo’s focus. At least, the older male stopped crying, eventhough his looks were still hysterical. “It’s okay. Calm down, Seongwoo-ya. You hear? It’s okay. I’m here,” Daniel repeated his words, following his memories, “It’s okay. I’m here with you. I’m with you. Everything will be okay. Breathe.”

 

Seongwoo hiccuped and his breath was still shallow, but he followed Daniel’s guide. “Mmm,” he weakly murmured. Daniel kept patting the older male’s back. “Calm down, okay?” Seongwoo’s rigid body slowly relaxed, gradually losing the tension. It was almost over half an hour later when the fit died down and Seongwoo finally whispered, “I’m so sorry. I’m such a mess.”

 

“No, it’s okay,” Daniel assured him, “What happened? You said that you lost something.”

 

“Mmm,” Seongwoo nodded. “I couldn’t find it, though I’m sure I put the box atop the drawer before.”

 

Seongwoo’s reply triggered something on Daniel. Carefully he asked, “What kind of box? What did you lose, Hyung?”

 

“It’s a small velvet box,” Seongwoo weakly replied, “With a pair of rings inside. I put it there… but it’s gone.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare yourself for a long ending notes:
> 
> * If you wanna try to make the Saikoro steak, you can try [the recipe.](https://food52.com/recipes/72850-thyme-and-rosemary-steak) Rosemary and Thyme are used to seasoned the steak, and they just substitute the steak’s cut into cubed. 
> 
> * The spinach salad is easier, and Seongwoo made it before on Idol Room. I included it as a tribute LOLZ~ Here’s a [recipe](https://www.maangchi.com/recipe/sigumchi-namul)
> 
> * My friend whom stayed in Korea and got Korean BF said that Korean usually didn’t eat just one type of rice grain. They used several grains together. You can read it [the wiki](http://www.beyondkimchee.com/korean-rice/>here</a>%20or%20<a%20href=)
> 
> *Btw yes, you can store some garlic. Here’s the explanation: [article](http://ucfoodsafety.ucdavis.edu/files/250352.pdf)
> 
> P.S. I made them cook the steak medium rare because many people seemed to prefer their steaks that way.  
> I prefer my steak to be medium well tho. What type of done-ness you like your steak?


	13. I don’t mind spending an eternity like this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel was keen for not using the usual hyung honorifics, “May I—“ Daniel’s voice was low and husky, send a shiver to Seongwoo’s body. The older male’s mind was muddled from all the oversensories; he wanted to converse yet he thought that it was unnecessary at the moment. Daniel wanted him. With or without the memories. The current Daniel still looked at him like he was the greatest thing happened in his life, someone precious, someone Daniel harboured feelings to.
> 
>  
> 
> **WARNING: NSFW, explicit smut**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday morning, lovelies~!!  
> First of all, I need to give you guys a warning: **this chapter is NSFW** so prepare yourself :3  
>  Well then, you may proceed LOLZ 
> 
> Have a great Monday~!

 

* * *

 

_“You sounded like you’re really love the concept of forever,” was one of the first thing Seongwoo blurted out when they were sitting side by side on the coffee shop—Americano on one hand, his face mask carefully tucked, Daniel’s rap lyrics sheet on the other hand. The iced Americano was slightly watery to his liking, but Seongwoo just shrugged it off and sucked the caffeine using the metal straw provided by the chop. “I mean, the lyrics are great and the rhymes are terrific; but this particular lyrics really screamed that you’re in love and you want to be together forever. It was nice, but it was different from your usual style… don’t you think?”_

 

_Daniel just smiled._

_“Ah, that one,” Using his elbow as support, he lounged on the polished wood table, eyes filled with amusement, “I still revised that one. I used too many obvious phrase.”_

 

_But still, he meant what he wrote on those lyrics. He poured what he felt towards the older male, in a rather too honest confession. He remembered those times when he wake up in the middle of the night and saw the other male beside him, sleeping peacefully. He remembered the tingling feelings whenever he saw those smiles. He remembered how the latter stood against the kitchen counter, making their morning coffee. Any occasion of their hands brushed against each other when they walked side by side. How they talked and laughed. How they stole glances on each other. Even when they fought over petty matters._

 

_He wrote how he felt grateful for those moments; how he cherished them all, and he didn’t mind to spent an eternity like this._

 

_“What?” Seongwoo asked, when Daniel kept staring at him, “Is there something on my face—?”_

 

_Daniel saw those eyes, those lips, those lips; he saw those triangular moles—half-hidden by the mask, shaded by the cap. “It was nothing,” Daniel said, still smiling, fingers hooked onto Seongwoo’s fingertips. The latter’s hands were beautiful, with nice clipped nails with pinkish tips, the shape was elegant and perfectly fitted with Daniel’s own hand. “It’s nothing,” he assured, secretly measuring the size of Seongwoo’s ring finger while thinking:_ Yep, I don’t mind spending an eternity like this.

 

* * *

 

Those eyes were still filled with tears when Seongwoo raised his gaze to Daniel. The younger male could see how much distress on those onyx coloured orbs. Those wet lashes fluttered and there were new tears rolled down Seongwoo’s cheeks as he hiccuped. “I— lost it.”

 

It pained Daniel’s heart greatly as he witnessed the anguish on Seongwoo’s behalf. Thousands of thoughts swirled inside his mind; most of them was lamenting how high Seongwoo put those rings on the pedestal: he was obviously considered them as something precious, something really important—and not by material means.

 

Daniel wanted to open his mouth, wanted to confess about the rings’s whereabout. When he saw the velvet box and a pair of rings with mobious symbol carved, his first reaction was a sudden inner turmoil. He loathed the fact that Seongwoo indeed got a lover, a mysterious one, someone whose name he didn’t dare to ask. He was jealous, spiteful about the unknown person who owned Seongwoo’s heart.

 

So he took it.

 

Just like that.

 

The box felt wrong inside the pockets of his jacket; it felt like it was burning as he rushed, leaving Seongwoo’s apartment. It felt like everyone would notice that Daniel just stole something precious from Seongwoo, betrayed the older male by doing so.

 

The same box of rings was still nestled inside the deepest pocket in his bag—he shoved it there, wanted to pretend that those rings were never exist to begin with. It was stupid and it was childish, but he wanted Seongwoo so badly and he was not willing to let Seongwoo’s mysterious lover took the older male from him.

 

Daniel wanted to ask about Seongwoo’s lover to Jisung, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Deep down, he was afraid. Insecure. He lost his memories and he didn’t remember much of his relationship with Seongwoo. The older male kept sending him mixed signals and Daniel made a gamble by hoping his feelings and attachments would be reciprocated. 

 

_Who is this person?_

_Who is this— guy?_

 

Daniel was almost certain it was a man. Most hints and traces he found refers to a male instead of female. There wasn’t any girl’s accessories, trinkets, clothes, or any of it. Things that obviously left behind by the so-called lover were men’s stuffs. Do that guy hold Seongwoo like this too? Do that guy kiss Seongwoo? What they do behind the closed door? The thoughts made his blood boils and Daniel despised them.

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Feeling jealous, he called the older’s name informally as he wiped Seongwoo’s tears, “Don’t cry. Please don’t cry…” 

 

He knew it was wrong and his consciousness screamed at him: _you are being cunning and you are taking advantages of his weakened state!!_ but Daniel touched Seongwoo’s gently using feathers-like touch. He cupped the latter’s face and pressed their forehead together. “I’m here,” He murmured, and Seongwoo didn’t reply.

 

But they older male didn’t push him away, and Daniel carefully leaned in to close the gap between them. He kissed those eyelids, those cheeks—their breath mixed together as Seongwoo let a small gasp when Daniel pecked on those luscious lips, tasting the sweetness once again. It wasn’t their first kiss after Daniel’s amnesia, and both times Seongwoo was crying and vulnerable. Daniel hated himself for doing these while he knew the latter’s mental condition wasn’t on the greatest shape, but he was desperate and he wanted the older male’s affection, even for just a fleeting moment.

 

Seongwoo’s lips felt a little bit cracked. Daniel nibbled on it, kneaded Seongwoo’s lower lip using his lips. He pushed away the heavy guilt that riddled his heart: _I’m sorry, but please let me indulge this moment. This might be my last chance._ As Daniel held Seongwoo’s waist and caressed the latter’s nape using his other hand, Seongwoo let a small moan and kissed him back. The older male finally clutched onto him, closed any gap between their torso.

 

The kiss tasted like the Merlot they drank before. The strong taste of wine had washed away the other scent and taste of their lunch, and the alcohol aroma lingered—bittersweet and somewhat fiery. It felt intoxicating. Deep down, Daniel wondered if he could blame the alcohol for this madness he succumbed into. It was a dick move to shifting the blame to alcoholic drinks, but it was easier if the two of them need to blame something. If Seongwoo couldn’t blame Daniel, he could blame the wine—drunkenness had been blamed so many times as the cause of people doing bizarre and unpredictable things. 

 

“Seongwoo-ya…” He whispered the latter’s name once more as he stole another kiss. He kissed the raven haired wholeheartedly, his own heart ached as he do so. _I never knew that kissing someone you love would be painful like this._ He felt like the bad guy, the intruder, the sly person who took advantages at Seongwoo. Yet he couldn’t stop himself. 

 

It was soft and longing; their lips danced against each other. Unhurried, it was a moment to slowly savoured. Seongwoo mouthed something inaudible, something that felt like a name. Daniel opened his eyes for a brief second, Seongwoo were still closing his eyes—brows finally relaxed, though those lashes were still wet from his tears earlier. Daniel felt the sharp _pang_ again, yet he deepened the kiss. Inside his arms, Seongwoo’s rigid body somewhat loosened. Daniel held the latter’s body, supported the older male’s weight. The lithe body felt solid, yet pliant under his palm. 

 

“Ni…el…”

There were no trace of disgust or rejection on those gasps. Seongwoo was simply called his name. The actor circled his arms around Daniel’s neck, the latter’s fingers clutched onto his broad back. Those fingers trailed back onto his nape. An electrifying chill went through Daniel’s spine as Seongwoo caressed his the sensitive spots on his nape and neck, spots he never knew that they were existed. 

 

“Niel-ah…” There was something erotic on Seongwoo’s groan. Inviting, tinted with lust. The older male let another gasp, followed by a moan as Daniel lost his last holding and laid Seongwoo’s back on the carpet. They were on Seongwoo’s bedroom, and the bed was practically next beside them—but something inside Daniel possessively rejected it; he couldn’t help but wonder the things Seongwoo had done with his lover on the bed. Jealously made he growled, a low and possessive grunt escaped his throat.

 

His lips trailed down to Seongwoo’s jaw, left a trail of peppering pecks down to the crook of his neck, right above his collarbone. The blonde haired licked the spot, nibbled on the soft alabaster skin—Seongwoo’s pulse was strong and loud. The raven haired let another short moan as Daniel latched onto the patch of his skin and sucked, hard. Seongwoo’s back arched instinctively, one of his legs nestled on Daniel’s hips. The younger male made a series of crimson marks, but Seongwoo’s mind was a mess and he didn’t do anything to protest the evidences.

 

Daniel’s left hand traveled down from Seongwoo’s shoulder, glided through his torso, left a traces of warmth that penetrated the fabric which separated their skin. Seongwoo buckled his hips as Daniel pushed his shirt up—the soft cotton got scrunched up and pooled on the upper side of his chest, detained on the line of his armpits.

There’s an _ummphhh_ groan escaped Seongwoo’s throat when Daniel put his heated palm on his stomach, slowly moved upwards onto his chest. Daniel’s lips sealed his own, thus another of his moan got held back when the MMO idol kneaded his nipple. The nubs hardened as Daniel keep stimulated it—pinched it repeatedly before teasingly twisted the perked tip. 

 

When Daniel’s lips finally left his, Seongwoo made a _fffwuaaaah_ sound—head threwn back, looked absolutely debauched with his messy hair, pink flushed skin, watery eyes, and swollen lips. He bit his lower lip, tried to suppressed his moans as Daniel’s mouth found the other one of his twin nubs and sucked it. The actor’s body jerked, quickly covered his mouth using the back of his hand as those teeth invaded his sensitive nubs. 

 

“Niel…” Seongwoo gasped, fingers clutched onto Daniel’s shoulder, “…ah… Mmmpphhh—“ 

 

Their breaths were frantic; Seongwoo heaved and his stomach tightened. Daniel’s weigh atop of him felt solid and reassuring. Their crotch grinded against each other; Seongwoo’s feet felt weak as Daniel rolled his hips and do the shallow thrust motions. Both of them could felt the latter’s member through the clothing, slowly becoming alive—begging to be touched.

 

Daniel cupped Seongwoo’s face, combed the hair out of the sweaty forehead. He could saw his own reflection on Seongwoo’s dilated pupils—both of them were a hot mess, ruffled and hungry for each other. Daniel leaned in once again and captured the older male’s lips, groaned as he quickened the pace his hips, dry humping the older male. Seongwoo mimicked his action by moving his own hips, synched the motions with Daniel’s.

 

The two of them had crossed the borderline for self-restraint. “Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel was keen for not using the usual hyung honorifics, “May I—“ Daniel’s voice was low and husky, send a shiver toSeongwoo’s body. The older male’s mind was muddled from all the oversensories; he wanted to converse yet he thought that it was unnecessary at the moment. Daniel wanted him. With or without the memories. The current Daniel still looked at him like he was the greatest thing happened in his life, someone precious, someone Daniel harboured feelings to. 

 

While Daniel’s chest was tight from guilty and anticipation, Seongwoo’s heart swell and soared. He wanted this; the continuation of their physical activity. He wanted Daniel to make love with him, joined their bodies into one. As he saw the uncertainties on Daniel’s eyes, Seongwoo smiled. He cupped back the latter’s face, brought Daniel’s face closer onto his, then pecked a soft kiss on the latter’s lips. He guided Daniel into his embrace, and gently he whispered on the younger male’s ear: “Yes. Make me yours.”

 

It was a billion times more intense than Daniel’s previous wet dream. The real Seongwoo was ethereally beautiful, deliciously sinful—with pinkish tint on his alabaster white skin, every curves of the nook and cranny of his body was irresistible. Daniel let a gasp as he heard Seongwoo’s response, a grunt that a little bit too loud. 

 

Daniel held his breath and swallowed his saliva as he took Seongwoo’s top off, the older male cooperated and threw his shirt aside before reached down to Daniel’s pants and unbuckled the jeans. He pulled the zipper down. Daniel was wearing a dark navy brief-style underwear from a designer brand, the logo circled the wide waistband—hanging low on the line if his deep V. Daniel’s packs were still toned up as ever, since especially he did exercise quite a lot the last two days despite his late night pigging up session with Seongwoo.

 

There was a blush on Seongwoo’s face as he noticed the bulge inside the brief—Courtesy to so many offcial and fan-captured videos, Daniel’s size was quite noticeable sometimes when they were performing on stage, so imagine how much it grows whenever he was in the mood. Seongwoo wanted to joke _Is that a snake in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?_ but he held back. It was been a while since they done this, and this was one of the rare moments when they were in the mood while it was still in the middle of the day.

 

The sunlight was still shining brightly, filled the room with all its glory, and Seongwoo wondered how Daniel could fit inside of him everytime they do it. He blushed even harder when he bit his lower lip and held his breath, palmed Daniel’s bulge and hesitantly do a knead motion. It was hot, rigid and pulsating under his touch, with a small pool of wet stain seeped through the area where the mushroom shaped head nestled inside the brief. 

Seongwoo gulped.

The same excitement made his whole body felt giddy. Daniel noticed his reaction and enthralled by it. The older male was half-lied on the carpet, slowly exposed his bottom half as he shyly let Daniel took off his pants. Seongwoo’s dark hair was messy, he tried to combed it using his fingers. “Um—“ He was embarrassed all of the sudden. Using his hands, Seongwoo covered his crotch and chest area—his nipples were puffy and swollen due Daniel’s earlier teasing. The twin nubs were really sensitive at the moment, and to see his own body reacted like that in such a sensual way made Seongwoo rather bashful about it.

 

It wasn’t their first time, but it was indeed their first sexual interaction after Daniel’s amnesia. He remembered that Daniel told him that he was the younger male’s first proper lover, but he didn’t know if Daniel got any experience about dating and making love before they met. After all, Daniel admitted that he learned the proper steps for the same gender’s intercourse from the internet. Do the current Daniel know about it—?

 

They were far crossing the point of return. Seongwoo knew that both him and Daniel couldn’t easily stop by this point of state. Daniel looked eager, and somewhat desparate. And Seongwoo himself admitted that he wanted to do it. He gave the younger male his consent already. 

 

Tried to avoid looking at Daniel’s groin and torso, Seongwoo gazed up. The Busan man got this unreadable expression on his face; Seongwoo wondered if Daniel was confused with how things evolved into—since the younger male didn’t know that the two of them are in a relationship and Seongwoo wasn’t a virgin maiden—though he was acting kinda like it at the moment due the awkwardness of the moment. Usually Daniel was the one leading, so confident and well prepared; and it was a new experience for Seongwoo to actually took initiative like this.

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel called his name again, voice hoarse. Daniel touched his cheeks again, kissed his forehead, nuzzled as he whispered, “I love you.”

 

It was soft and even faint, but Seongwoo heard it clearly. His eyes felt hot, and tears swelled up beyond his control. Daniel’s brows furrowed as he was concerned to see Seongwoo’s crying face. “Give me a chance,” He said, and something tugged Seongwoo’s heart. _Give me a chance._ Daniel asked a chance before, and Seongwoo gave it before. But he was also the one who always try to take the chance away, evading Daniel and their relationship.

 

“Mmm,” He replied in an incoherent response. But he nodded, pecked the corner of Daniel’s mouth as he tried to steal a kiss. Daniel’s expression was tender as he gazed unyieldingly, straight to Seongwoo’s soul. “If you’re fine with me, I’ll give you my everything”

 

Seongwoo couldn’t ask for more. He was beyond ecstatic, trapped in an explosion of euphoria. “Yes,” He replied, a smile formed as he combed the sides of Daniel’s hair—letting those slicked back hairstyle fell down. Daniel looked younger with this kind of hairdo, but his innocent look was tainted with the desire burned inside his eyes.

 

Daniel kissed him again, hands roamed Seongwoo’s bare skin. Now without the barrier of their clothing, their skin met directly, felt fiery and dangerous. Seongwoo gasped and threw his head back as Daniel made series of hickeys on his neck; his legs opened up and nestled on the younger waist once again. His own member went rigid, leaked the transparent slick already since Daniel kept rolling his hips and repeated the thrust humping motions.

 

When it became so unbearable, Seongwoo noticed that Daniel reached for something—Seongwoo made a mess of his drawer earlier and the small bottle of unopened lube was thrown away along with his other stuffs. The younger male poured it onto his palm, warmed the gel before coated his fingers with the lube. He traced Seongwoo’s entrance—the rings of muscles were twitching with anticipation, welcoming Daniel’s ministration. It was tight, since it was quite a while since their last lovemaking session. His body recognized Daniel’s touch though, steadily eased himself to receive the preparation.

 

Daniel took his time, but it seemed that he was quite unexperienced with the process—the current him didn’t have any experience with sex between males at his current memory’s limit. His fingers still sending jolts of pleasure to Seongwoo nevertheless, and soon the older male moved his own hips unconsciously, synched with Daniel’s fingers movement.

“Your insides are twitching…” Daniel’s comment sounded like a dirty talk, and Seongwoo let a low protest moan. Using one of his legs, he nudged Daniel closer, hinting him to fill him up already. Daniel gulped, his face was red. Biting Seongwoo’s earlobe, he whispered, “Seongwoo-ya… I want to put it in…”

 

“Nnghh—“ Seongwoo nodded, moaned even more as Daniel kissed his collarbone and shoulders, the tip of his member rubbed and nudged against Seongwoo’s rings of muscles. Slowly, he pushed further—and Seongwoo could felt Daniel entered him; inch by inch, filled his insides with the pulsating rod. It wasn’t painful, but the sensation made Seongwoo’s inner muscles to clenched Daniel’s member hard. Daniel groaned, “Seongwoo-ya—“

 

Seongwoo heaved, and Daniel caressed the inner side of his thigh, easing him up. “Relax…” he whispered, and Seongwoo tried. Daniel was being patient and gentle with him, just like their messy first time on Seongwoo’s old apartment. Daniel jerked and rolled his hips, then made the final thrust—his member finally buried to the hilt. 

 

“Hyah—!” As Daniel slammed himself and hit Seongwoo’s sweet spot hard, the older male’s body tensed up. He twitched hard for a couple of seconds before his whole body went limp inside Daniel’s embrace. The blonde haired stared at him bewilderedly, noticing the older male’s expression, legs still trembling from the earlier sensation.

 

“You came—?” Daniel’s lips curled into a smile. Both of them were sweaty, and Daniel looked absolutely sinful like this. Seongwoo still dazed from the dry orgasm, replied with a series of rambles. Daniel combed Seongwoo’s fringe using his fingers, kissed the luscious lips again, slowly moved his hips. Seongwoo’s moans were muffled by the kiss; Daniel thrusted deep and hard—the pace was steady and angled himself until he found and perfectly hit Seongwoo’s sweet spot everytime he pounded in.

 

Seongwoo’s stomach tightened again; the knot felt familiar as waves of pleasure washed him over and over again. Daniel quickened his pace, almost ruthless. Seongwoo’s back arched, his hips moved in synch with Daniel’s thrusts. Once in a while, when Seongwoo almost reached the peak, Daniel will slowed down. Deliberately postpone the climax, he would buried himself deep and made a rotated scrape motion instead. Enduring the tease, Seongwoo’s legs were turned into a jelly. He felt limbless—his body felt weak from the overwhelming sensation.

 

“Want to…” Seongwoo bit his lower lip as he tried not to moan, “…come—Akh…!” 

 

Finally, Daniel relented and picked up the tempo. He keep thrusting when Seongwoo’s body started to trashed. In almost a brutal peak, Seongwoo trembled as his vision turned white. His body shook, and he created a sticky mess between their bodies. His inner muscles tightened violently, and Daniel let a groan as he reached his climax as well. He released his seeds inside Seongwoo—their bodies went lax yet Daniel didn’t pull out yet. He made several shallow thrusts, keep kissing on Seongwoo’s shoulder. 

 

_With this… are you mine now, Hyung?_

 

Seongwoo’s eyes went heavy as he was feeling sated. He tried to open his eyes, but he was tired and the blissful feeling post the coitus drowned him drowsy. Seongwoo let another gasp put when Daniel finally pulled himself out—his rings of muscles emitted a popped wet noise, followed by the drips that leaked out as he could felt his entrance gaped after being so stretched out earlier. Seongwoo let a mumbled response as Daniel asked him about something—he couldn’t recognize the questions. It was hard to form a decent sentence. 

 

Yet when Daniel kissed his forehead again, softly whispering “I love you” on his ears, Seongwoo was actually replied: “I love you too…”

* * *

 

 

Daniel put back the small basin on Seongwoo’s bathroom counter. 

He had wiped and cleaned the older male from their previous activity, put the raven haired on the bed and tucked him in. After hesitating for a while, he even tidied the mess Seongwoo created when he was looking for the rings.

 

He took the velvet box from his bag—it looked so harmless on his palm. Yet, it created a big turmoil in his heart. Daniel couldn’t stop himself from being jealous, to imagined Seongwoo’s lover, foolishly being jealous as the result. 

 

He wondered about the things they’ve done. 

Surely, it wasn’t always something innocent. Seongwoo owned a bottle of lube—The older male’s body was really sensitive, and he reacted in a manner that indicated that he got some experience about the whole matter. Daniel burned with jealousy. While he was making love with Seongwoo, he was so desperate—his chest felt wrecked with unsettledness and guilt. Without confirming Seongwoo’s lover worth, he seduced and snatched the older male. He was also the one who stole the rings, and he was keeping the fact from Seongwoo.

 

The velvet box remained in his hand. Daniel sighed, “…what should I do with these—?”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....and I need to tell you guys that this chapter is the calm before the storm XDXD  
>  *run away*


	14. Do you really love me?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ....prepare your kokoro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi ya lovelies~!!  
> It's another Monday morning, so here's another update for the series~
> 
> ...remember my warning that I put on last chapter's ending note?  
> Oh well, the chapter summary explained it all: prepare your kokoro.

 

* * *

 

“Jisung…!”

The MMO idol stopped walking and turned his head to the familiar voice whom called him earlier. On the other side of the corridor, one of his former group member waved at him. The tall figure was smiling, picked up his pace and hurriedly half-running towards him. His jet black hair was styled in his usual double comma style, gave a nice contrast to his milky white skin. The fox-like eyes turned thinner as he smiled, “Hey, long time no see.”

 

Jisung smiled back. “Yeah, indeed. You guys are busy as ever. Congratulations for your comeback.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Minhyun was wearing a white military style suit—the inner shirt was white, the fabric was rather thin as Jisung could see Minhyun’s skin peeked underneath. The jacket and the pants were made using the same thick fabric; on a glimpse it looked as an ordinary white suit, yet when you took a closer look you will definitely notice the embossed Art Nouveau floral pattern, embroidered using white silk thread. The pattern glimmered under the light—and to match the regal look, there were silver coloured metal buttons and gold embroidered shoulder strap with Nu’est emblem there.

 

“Where are the others?” Jisung asked, since Minhyun was obviously alone. The taller male answered, “Ah, they were on the changing room. I’m the one who got finished first, then one of the staffs said that you’re here on the building as well.”

 

The two of them were on KBS station building. Jisung was heading to the staff’s cafetaria as it was almost lunch time. He had an early shooting as one of the guest panelist of KBS’s newest variety show. Yoo Jae Suk was chosen to be one of the main MCs, and he recommended Jisung to be invited to the show. After all, the big mouth squad had been WANNA ONE’s sworn brother since the Happy Together episodes years earlier.

 

“Do you want something to eat?” Jisung pointed to the cafetaria, “Or at least a sandwich and anything to drink?” 

 

“Sure,” Minhyun walked along with him. They went to the nearest vending machine and purchased two cups of cafe latte. There were a more secluded area near the corner—the two of them headed there, occasionally bowed whenever any public figures or staffs greeted them. They sat on the chair, modelled after a bar stool—the single seated was placed towards a big panelled window, giving them a rather spectacular view of the cityscapes.

 

“It’s been a few days,” Minhyun took a sip of his coffee, “How’s Daniel?” He was particularly worried about the former center. It was already too much when you heard that your friend got involved into an accident and need to be taken to the hospital—the amnesia news was dropped like a bomb, and when Seongwoo suddenly asked the WANNA ONE’s members to keep quiet about his relationship with Daniel, Seongwoo’s request actually baffled him.

 

It didn’t help their worries as Daniel told them about the company’s decision: they wanted to keep quiet about the amnesia and asked him to follow his scheduled works like there were nothing wrong. Daniel need to face it up and re-learned everything and they couldn’t help much about it, else than giving him the moral support.

 

Jisung sighed, “He was trying hard. He was spending most of his time watching the performances, googling everything he could, and practicing for hours. I hope he won’t got sick.”

 

“And how about Seongwoo—?”

 

Being asked about Seongwoo, Jisung sighed again. “Well,” Jisung put his paper cup on the table, “Seongwoo do have issues. I noticed it. He begged me so hard and that’s why I relented. I hope he’ll find a solution and come clean to Daniel though. There will be nothing good happen with him being hush hush and keeping Daniel in the dark, while the kid was obviously fell head over heels with him—he loves him just the same, minus the memory. Seriously, these kids made me worry over and over—just thinking about their matter makes my head swell.”

 

“They sure spent so much time together though,” Minhyun remembered those articles exploded on the internet and media about Daniel and Seongwoo spending their time together—it was even confirmed that Daniel will appear as a cameo on Seongwoo’s current drama.

 

“I just wish that everything will be okay,” Jisung took the last sip of his coffee, “And neither of them ended up doing something stupid.”

 

* * *

 

It was still bright when Seongwoo opened his eyes. 

The sun was still high and bright, filtered by the film sheet on his window and the sheer curtain, filled his bedroom with radiant white. Everything was tidy as the mess he made before looked like they were never happened. He felt like he was still dreaming—he was wearing his pyjamas, covered by his blanket. The bed felt soft and really comfortable; yet when he stretched his body, he felt aches in different spots on his body. He was familiar with the dull aches though, and the memories of his vigorous love making with Daniel rushed back—rendered him blushed, cheeks tainted with crimson red.

 

“Aaah,” He sighed, feeling really embarrassed. Seongwoo covered his face using his hands, his cheeks felt like burning. He wanted to scold himself. He remembered that the last time he was fully conscious, Daniel was still buried deep inside of him. Then he felt dizzy and sleepy, the remainder of his memories turned blur and hazy. At the moment, he was wearing a new set of clothes, sitting on his bed. Did Daniel cleaned him and tucked him in…?

 

Slowly, he rubbed his cheeks. They were clean, and Seongwoo made a guess that Daniel even helped him to remove his make up—he still wore the make up they applied for the show when he went home. Seongwoo’s heart went soft, as he remembered that once in a while during their WANNA ONE era the younger male would helped him to clean his face using the cleanser and some cotton pads whenever he was too tired and sleepy to do it by himself.

 

He was alone on the bed, and Seongwoo wondered if Daniel had left his apartment. The thought of him being alone there as Daniel went home bothered him. Still, the apartment seemed really quiet: there wasn’t any noise came from the living room area. Seongwoo felt his chest tightened. “Niel-ah…?” He weakly called, but there wasn’t any response. 

 

Hastily, he threw his blanket aside. Just as he tried to stood up, his legs gave out. He fell in a rather loud _thump_ eventhough the fall was cushioned by the carpet. His palm slammed the wall by the bed as well when he tried to grab something, resulted in a following _bang_ noise. “Awww,” He winced. It didn’t really hurt, but he was surprised by how loud the sound of his fall. 

 

All of the sudden, there was a rushed footsteps sound coming from the living room. His bedroom’s door swinged open, and Daniel’s worried face soon appeared. “What happened?! Are you okay—?”

 

Seongwoo was still taken aback with the situation, merely eyeing Daniel. His mouth opened, but he just could replied. Seeing Seongwoo in all four, looked weak and unable to say anything, Daniel panicked. “Seongwoo-ya—“ He kneeled in front of Seongwoo, held the latter’s arms, “Are you okay?” He frantically examined Seongwoo’s body. There wasn’t any external injuries, so he quickly put his palm on Seongwoo’s forehead. The older male’s temperature was normal, so Daniel sighed in relief.

 

He cupped Seongwoo’s face, bring the older male’s face up, “Are you okay—?”

 

Seongwoo blushed, his lips quivered yet he still unable to properly replied. He nodded though, quickly averted his eyes from Daniel’s face. It wasn’t their first time, but Seongwoo felt really shy and awkward—he didn’t know what to do. He really wanted to yell to himself: _What the hell are you doing….! You are not a virgin maiden, Ong Seongwoo…!!_

 

“Are you mad with me…?” Daniel looked like a dejected puppy as he asked the question, head tilted to the side. Seongwoo swore he could see the imaginary flattened ears and tails on the younger male. “Of course not,” Seongwoo anwered immediately, “It’s just—“

 

His words died down. Daniel leaned in, tried to peek on Seongwoo’s expression. The older male lowered his head as his cheeks felt hot with embarrassment—he was sure that his face was dusted by crimson hue. “It’s just…?” Daniel repeated Seongwoo’s anwer, nudged him to continue.Seongwoo tried to stand, but he failed to do so. As he fell once again, Daniel held him, “Be careful…!”

 

Seongwoo’s waist felt powerless. His legs shaken whenever he tried to walk even a step forward. It’s been a long time since it happened, and Seongwoo covered his face using his hand as he weakly told Daniel, “My legs gave out…”

 

“Eh?”

 

Took a while before Daniel understood what happened to Seongwoo’s body. He blushed as well, apologized as he tugged the hem of Seongwoo’s shirt, “I’m so sorry. I should’ve been gentler earlier.”

 

“…don’t be,” Seongwoo still buried his face using his palms, “I asked you to do it. And I enjoyed it as well.”

 

Seongwoo’s answer sounded harmless, but something cut deep inside Daniel. He felt like an used object; a tool. Sure he partake on the love making voluntarily—one could even said that he was the one initiated it. Seongwoo complied, so it was a fair give and take. But that’s it. It felt like a casual sex between sex friends, something to satisfied their desire and bodily needs. It wasn’t equivalent with doing it with somebody they love—Daniel sure did it out of love, but he wasn’t sure about Seongwoo’s side of perspective. 

 

He wanted to ask _“Hyung, what are we…?”_ to Seongwoo, but he couldn’t bear to blurt out the question. At the moment, Seongwoo’s body was weak and he was the main cause of it. So Daniel put his arms under Seongwoo’s armpits and knees, gently lifted him up. Being suddenly carried in a bridal style carry, Seongwoo shrieked a bit, “Niel-ah…!”

 

“Well, you couldn’t walk,” Daniel assured him, tried to be playful and flirty to suit their previous mood, “Where do you wanna go to? The bathroom? The living room? Are you hungry—?”

 

“I’m…” Seongwoo hesitated for a moment, then he decided to be honest, “I was looking for you actually. I’m afraid that you had left, and no one answered when I called your name.”

 

“You are looking for me…?” Daniel was surprised. His chest felt somewhat warm. _Seongwoo was looking for him. He didn’t want Daniel to leave just yet._ He felt a triumphant feeling growing and swelling, “Sorry, Hyung. I was watching my latest variety show using earphones—that’s why I didn’t hear you before.”

 

The _hyung_ honorific struck a thunder on Seongwoo. Daniel was switching to _Seongwoo-ya_ for a while before, and he had forgotten how painful it was to actually being addressed using _hyung_ by the younger male. It felt like a remainder of his mistake; his lie—something that he need to fix soon before his lie snowballed into something bigger and unfixable.

 

“Daniel,” Seongwoo called his name, tone firm and serious, “We need to talk. I need to tell you about something.”

 

There was a bad premonition on Daniel’s heart as he heard Seongwoo’s tone. He didn’t know what this _talk_ will be about, but he didn’t think it will be a good topic. Seongwoo looked determined, still ethereally beautiful with after sex glow—Daniel’s hickeys scattered on his necks. Daniel wondered if Seongwoo was mad about the hickeys. Or the sex earlier. He was afraid that Seongwoo would tell him that it was a mistake and they should buried the moment as a dirty little secret.

_It’s a mishap_ , He imagined Seongwoo said the sentence, cold and firm. _Please forget about it and never mention it again, Niel-ah._

 

Daniel’s heart went even more restless as he remembered the velvet box inside his bag. He had shoved the box of rings back to the pocket of his backpack as he didn’t want Seongwoo to find about the rings whereabouts yet. Do Seongwoo knew about him stealing the rings?

 

Daniel opened his mouth, wanted to ask Seongwoo, _“Talk about what, Seongwoo Hyung?”_ but he didn’t want to lead the conversation that way. So instead he brought Seongwoo to the living room and gently laid the older male on the sofa.

 

“Hyung,” He tried to be playful, ignoring Seongwoo’s earlier sentence, “I’m hungry. What should we eat? Should we order something? Or should I cook something for you?”

 

Seongwoo was taken aback by Daniel’s response, though he didn’t think that Daniel was deliberately evaded the topic, “Niel, it’s important—“

 

“After dinner,” Daniel’s voice sounded like a plea. He kneeled there by the sofa, facing Seongwoo. He took the older male’s hands and gave it a soft squeeze, “Please. After dinner? Then we’ll talk later. I’ll… listen.”

 

“…” 

Seongwoo looked like he really wanted to do the talk immediately—he opened his mouth, wanted to say something, but the look on Daniel’s face made his resolve weaken. “After dinner,” Daniel’s tone was somewhat pleading, thumb still circling on Seongwoo’s wrist, “Hmm?”

 

“…okay,” Seongwoo gave in. After a meal, maybe the tension will be lesser. Maybe Daniel could handle the confession better in full stomach and sated palate. Hearing the older male’s reply, a smile formed on Daniel’s face. “What do you want to eat, Hyung?”

 

Seongwoo stared at Daniel’s face with a tight heart. The MMO idol looked happy and so-puppy-like, kneeling in front of the sofa like this. He patted Daniel’s head, combed the latter’s blonde locks using his fingers—felt soft yet a little bit frizzy since Daniel changed his hair colour quite often. “Make me your kimchi fried rice, Niel-ah?” He requested, and Daniel beamed back at him, “Sure…!”

 

He asked Seongwoo to stay there on the sofa. “I’ll cook,” He said, “So just rest, okay? Do you need anything?” Seongwoo shook his head and smiled, nudged the younger male to the kitchen. From his position, he could see the kitchen well—so Daniel occasionally looked at him and waved while he was preparing the utensils. 

 

Kimchi fried rice was one of Daniel’s go to dish. It was simple, one of the first dish he mastered. He took the pan from the hanging rack, poured the cooking oil in. Using Seongwoo’s preserved garlic, he took a spoonful and sautéed it along with chopped bacon strips. After it was halfway cooked, he added the handmade kimchi from Seongwoo’s fridge. Since he found some pre-sliced enoki mushroom on a transparent Tupperware container next to the kimchi tub jar, he added it to the pan as well.

 

He reduced the heat to medium, then poured the left-over rice and the kimchi juice. Daniel also added some gochujang paste that had been diluted with some water and soy sauce. The white smokes rose high when the liquid touched the hot pan, quickly spread into the air—before it was sucked by the exhaust vent, though the familiar delicious aroma escaped the kitchen. As Daniel added more seasonings and drizzled the sesame oil as the last touch before he continued mixing the ingredients, he looked up once again and waved to Seongwoo. The older male was watching him cook with… a rather unreadable expression. There was some melancholy there, but Seongwoo was smiling; so Daniel announced, “It will be ready soon…!”

 

“Okay,” Seongwoo waved back at him, almost chuckled. He watched Daniel’s every moves, etched the latter’s expression and mannerism to his heart. Maybe it was right when people said that you won’t realize how precious something before you actually lost them. Seeing his lover cooked from him, seemed eager to pleased him, made Seongwoo’s chest felt hot. He felt like he wanted to cry, but he shouldn’t—so he took some deep breaths and continue staring at Daniel.

 

Daniel plated the fried rice into two plates, garnished it with some chopped green onions, roasted sesame seeds and two mini tomatoes. It looked fancy enough, though Daniel failed to make a runny sunny side up to be placed atop the rice. The yolk broke while the egg wasn’t cooked yet, the whites mixed with the other egg’s so it ended up into a messed up scrambled egg since he couldn’t save them. Since he didn’t want to waste the eggs, he didn’t make a new sunny side up.

 

“Sorry about the eggs,” Daniel bashfully apologized as he placed the plates on the small wooden table. Seongwoo crawled down, the smile never left his face, “It’s okay, Niel-ah. I like scrambled eggs.”

 

Daniel handed him the spoon, then he went back to retrieved some juice for them. “Here’s yours,” He handed Seongwoo the black mug with the cat patterns, while he was using the white one Seongwoo used to served his coffee the first time he visited the apartment. It was their couple mugs, and Daniel had correctly gave him the black mug.

 

It was fascinating how a simple, mundane things made you felt loved. Seongwoo felt like a blind who saw lights for the first time; a deep, sudden appreciation swelled inside his heart. _I love you. I’m sorry for all my past behaviours. I was stupid and I was blind—I didn’t deserve your love. Yet now I yearned for our past moments. I want you to stay here with me, by my side, and never leave._

 

“Thanks,” was all he could said, rather shaky as an annoying lump appeared inside his throat. Seongwoo resisted his urge to cry, though his eyes felt hot in response. He tried to focus to the fried rice instead: took a spoonful, blew for a while since it was still piping hot, before finally brought it into his mouth. As he chew, the familiar taste spread inside his mouth—Daniel had made the dish so many times in the past yet today was the very first time Seongwoo really grateful about it.

 

“How is it?” 

Seongwoo turned his head and found out that Daniel was staring at him the whole time—eyes filled with anticipation. He looked excited and worried at the same time. Seongwoo laughed, “It was super delicious, Niel-ah.”

 

“Ah, stop praising me with obvious bluff,” Daniel denied it, but there was a grin plastered on his face. The corner of his lips curled up and he was beaming with proud. “Let’s dig in though,” He said, and took a spoonful of rice himself. 

 

They ate in almost silence. While Seongwoo blissfuly unaware and savoured the moment, Daniel was anxious about the talk Seongwoo wanted to tell him. He started to feel guilty. _Should I give back the rings? Should I come clean and confess that I took it before—or saying a white lie by telling him that I found it on the cabinet while I tidied the place up? It wasn’t a complete lie… But I’ll be a giant asshole if I lie to Seongwoo._

 

“I’ll wash the dishes,” Daniel said when the two of them had finished the meal. He was trying to stalling the talk as long as he could. Seongwoo seemed wanted to object, but Daniel smiled and hushed him, “Let me do it. Just rest, Hyung.”

 

Without waiting for Seongwoo’s reply, Daniel picked up the dirty dishes and took it to the sink. He washed everything, including the cooking utensils, double washed them unnecessarilyand took his sweet time to dry the whole dishes. He knew that Seongwoo was growing impatient, but he still unhurriedly placed the dried plates and pans to the places they were belong.

 

“Daniel.”

 

Daniel winced internally. On the sofa, Seongwoo looked weary. His tone of voice was firm, “Come, sit here with me.” Daniel wanted to reject it—he wanted to make more excuses. But he had none and he couldn’t think anything, so he dejectedly approached the older male. Seongwoo’s stern eyes softened, he offered his hands—Daniel took it and let the older male guided him to the sofa. 

 

The raven haired stared straight at him, and Daniel noticed that he got a slightly red rims on his eyes—traces of tears. His alabaster skin looked soft and glowing nevertheless, the three moles on his cheek was clearly shown as there wasn’t any cosmetics to cover them. Daniel stared at the moles rather fondly; he remembered when he was still there on the hospital bed, he saw Seongwoo entered the room and one of the things he noticed right away was the latter’s triangular moles. They looked like the summer’s constellation—befitting the older male’s current drama. 

 

Daniel’s eyes wavered down, to the older male’s lips. They were pinkish in colour, though it was a little bit pale at the moment. It was still a little bit swollen, looked absolutely well-kissed. Something swirled and roared inside Daniel’s chest as he was the one passionately kissed Seongwoo earlier, which caused the looks.

 

He saw those traces of crimson on Seongwoo’s neck and collarbone, remembered that there were more underneath the pyjamas the actor wore. Daniel wanted somekind of proof, a trace—medals, memento from their love making. So that he remembered the moment whenever he saw Seongwoo; that it wasn’t a dream. A fleeting moment maybe, but not a dream. Definitely not his own self delusion. 

 

Daniel was so busy with his own thought that when Seongwoo opened his mouth and finally spoke, he was startled as he was brought back to reality. “Daniel,” The older male called his name again, the latter’s hands held his own hands tight. Seongwoo seemed like he was thinking about something. Hesitantly, he lowered his head, unable to see Daniel eye to eye. “I need to tell you the truth.”

 

“…the…” Daniel felt the bad premonition again, “…truth?”

 

“Yeah.” Seongwoo looked pained, “I’m really, really sorry. It was my mistake—“

 

“Hyung—“

 

“Let me finished,” Seongwoo still held Daniel’s hand, refused to let the younger male go,  
“I did something terrible, Daniel. I— I did wrong to you. I lied. I need to apologize for it. I—“ He was rambling. Seongwoo heaved, felt his panic attack surged up. “Wait,” His hands turned icy cold, “I need to re-arrange my words. My mind was a mess—“

 

“Hyung—“ Daniel wanted him to stop. He was confused. But he didn’t like Seongwoo’s state at the moment and he was afraid of what will happened. Or said. He felt so restless about it. “Niel-ah,” Seongwoo trembled, and he clutched the younger’s arm—slowly raised his head, his eyes were misty as he looked at Daniel. The younger male looked anxious, and the annoying lump went back to Seongwoo’s throat.

 

“I lied to you,” He almost choke as he confessed, “I asked Jisung, our managers and the other WANNA ONE’s members to keep quiet about it. Don’t blame them for my selfish mistake.”

 

“….what lie—?” Daniel felt his heart sinking. _What happened? What kind of mess is it about? A lie?_

 

Seongwoo opened his mouth, tried to say something, but he was failed to do so. He closed his mouth again, opened it again, looked absolutely tormented. He took a few deep breath, his fingers were icy cold and he started shivering. Daniel held back Seongwoo’s wrist, “Hyung—?”

 

“I—“ Seongwoo’s lips quivered, lowered his head once again, “I planned to explained it using the rings. But I lost them. Sorry, Niel-ah. I lost the rings you gave me—“

 

“…rings?” Daniel remembered the rings. The velvet box was still inside his backpack. What did Seongwoo just said? He gave it to Seongwoo? But… it was… from Seongwoo’s lover, wasn’t it? He was reluctant, slowly connecting the dots by himself. “Wait—“

 

“Daniel, I’m so sorry. We fought the night before,” Seongwoo rambled, “It was always the same problem. I was a mess. I felt like I was ruining your life. I felt like I need to atone, that I need to let you free if you wanted to move on.”

… _what?_

 

“So when they said that you got amnesia… I thought it was my chance.” Seongwoo’s voice was rasp, went faint, but he keep explaining, “I thought… if you didn’t remember about us, you could move on with your life. Being normal. Met a nice young woman, got married… Have a happy family and life happily ever after. So I begged Jisung. I begged the other members. I asked our managers to keep quiet about our relationship.”

 

Daniel’s eyes widened as he stared on the older male. Seongwoo still lowered his head, his shoulders trembled. “I was lying to you, Niel-ah. I lied about our relationship. I tried my best to cover it all, I wanted to… avoid you. But you came to me.”

 

Seongwoo paused again. “You came to me…” He slowly continued, “With or without your memories, you still came to me. And then I realized that I was wrong. That I was a fool. I need you, and somewhat you need me too…”

 

Daniel’s grip loosened, and Seongwoo clasped the latter’s fingers, “I was lying to you and I’m so sorry. I love you, Niel-ah. I love you so much—“

 

“Then,” Daniel’s voice went husky as he interrupted, “Why did you lie? Do you want to break up with me then, Hyung?”

 

“Because…” Seongwoo’s vision went dark for a moment. His heart beats rapidly as he closed his eyes, feeling the world swirling, “Because I was afraid, Niel-ah. I felt like someone evil, robbing you from the life you should have. I robbed you the prospect of having proper family, children of your own. I was afraid of the public judgement. The scandal will cause you your future and your career, Niel-ah—“

 

Daniel took Seongwoo’s hand, slowly released the latter’s grip from his wrist and fingers. Seongwoo’s breath hitched as he was shocked from Daniel’s action. His pupils were shaken when he saw the cold, grim expression on Daniel’s face. The younger male looked angry.

 

“You know, _Hyung_ ,” Daniel made the honorific sounded like a sneer, “It was really one sided decision from you, wasn’t it? You… sounded like you just wanted an excuse, any excuse, to break up with me. Because you were afraid of something, and it mattered more than me. Mattered more than our relationship.”

 

“No…!” Seongwoo’s gasped, “No, you’re wrong…!”

 

“Oh yeah?” Daniel slowly chuckled; cruel and filled with mockery, “Coz it didn’t sounded that way to me. Hyung, you… betrayed me. You knew that? Do you realize that? You betrayed me, tried your best to ditched me. I got this damned amnesia and I couldn’t remember the last three years of my own life. I was terrified. Everything was unfamiliar, every damn thing felt like walking on a tightrope. I was desperate. I looked up to you—I love you… and you betrayed me.”

 

Seongwoo’s eyes filled with tears, and Daniel pulled his hand from Seongwoo’s grip. “Stop crying…!” Daniel’s voice was stern, “Don’t try to fix everything with tears, _Hyung_. You are making me the bad guy, and you’re the innocent victim…!”

 

“No…!”

 

Daniel’s words were harsh and cruel, cut the deepest part on Seongwoo’s fragile soul. “That’s not it,” He couldn’t stop crying, “But yeah, I was wrong. I’m sorry about it. It was my fault. But I do love you, Niel-ah. I didn’t lie about that. I was just afraid that the scandal would ruin your life, ruining the career you’ve built—“

 

“Why did you even call our relationship a scandal?!” Daniel was so frustrated, “One sentence you were saying that you love me and you’re sorry. But you keep making excuses, _Hyung._ Then you called our relationship as… a scandal. Don’t you love me?! DO YOU REALLY LOVE ME—?!”

 

“I—“

 

Seongwoo couldn’t say anything. His mind went blank. Daniel was furious and he didn’t know what to do. He was wrong and the younger male got the right be to angry. Seongwoo had deceived him, or just Daniel said before: _betrayed him_. He took advantages of Daniel’s amnesia and betrayed him while the younger male was trapped in a really vulnerable state. He couldn’t find any excuses for his behaviour.

 

Those dark feelings came back, creeped from the deepest part of him, laughed and mocked him. Tied him up, rendered him speechless. His mouth gaped as he tried to plea, but he couldn’t voice anything. “No…” He whispered, after a great deal of effort, “Niel, please—“

 

He tried to reach Daniel’s hands once again, but the younger male twitched and pulled back. He left the couch, rage roared from his figure; the look of utter disappointment was clearly plastered on the younger male’s face.

 

“I couldn’t believe you,” He hissed.

 

Daniel took his backpack and swinged it into his back, rushed to the front door as he pushed his feet to his shoes. Witnessing the familiar scene all over again, Seongwoo’s heart shattered. The memory of Daniel took out the ring from his finger and placed it to the counter replayed over and over again.

 

—

_“So you don’t want me, then?,” Daniel took a deep breath, pulled out his ring from his own fingers, then put the platinum band on the wooden counter by the_ hyeon gwan _. “You can keep mine. Throw it away for me.”_

 

_He shoved his feet into his sneakers and unlocked Seongwoo’s front door. It was closed again a moment and the automated jingle chimed, leaving Seongwoo rooted on his place where he stood earlier, all alone._

—

 

“NO, NIEL…!” He tried to chase the latter, but his legs still got no power and he tumbled down, “Please listen to me… Sorry Niel-ah… I was wrong… Please… Don’t leave—“

 

But without turning his gaze even once, Daniel closed the door.

 

The automated chime signal sounded like a cruel joke to Seongwoo. In front of him, the front door slowly went blurry. His vision was filled with tears. 

 

“No,” He whispered, heartbroken, “…I didn’t want this… Don’t leave…”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For steps by steps guide to cook the kimchi fried rice, you may see the simple recipe [here](https://mykoreankitchen.com/kimchi-fried-rice/). Daniel’s recipe is a little bit different though.


	15. "I'm Home."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Seongwoo…_  
>  Daniel remembered the devastated expression. The tears. The plea. He remembered how he trembled, how he looked pained. How the older male held his hands tightly, refusing to let go.  
>  _“Please listen to me… Sorry Niel-ah… I was wrong… Please… Don’t leave—“_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday morning, lovelies!!  
> Last week my inbox were filled so many tears and screams ((sorry about the angst)) but it was necessary for the plot, so bear with me okay guys? Here's this week's update, I hope it will ease your OngNiel dose for the day :)
> 
> Enjoy~~

 

* * *

  

_“There are some things about myself I can’t explain to anyone. There are some things I don’t understand at all. I can’t tell what I think about things or what I’m after... But if I start thinking about these things in too much detail the whole thing gets scary.”_ —Haruki Murakami

 

* * *

 

It was near seven o’clock in the evening when Jisung went home from a radio show. He was asked to joined the cast since the theme was ‘ _leaders of boy idol groups’—_ eventhough he wasn’t at any group at the moment, he was invited along with the others. He met Jonghyun there, one of the familiar faces—he joked around with the Nu’est leader since he met with Minhyun earlier. S.Coups from Seventeen, Taeyong from NCT and Hyojin from ONF also joined the broadcast, so it almost felt like a mini reunion from their 2018 Dispatch’s leader line photoshoot. With another two more leaders from the new boy groups that recently debuted, the broadcasting room was kinda crowded with 9 people, including 2 of the radio DJ.

 

They joked around while answering the questions, and Jisung tried to be playful. He was one of the oldest there, and got so many praise and compliments for his pristine skin condition. He was also asked about the previous times during Produce 101 and WANNA ONE era, and he answered the questions witfully. He bantered with the DJs, tried to keep the mood light and cheerful. He retold the MMO squad’s jokes during the first episode of the Produce 101, “The staffs would say _‘MMO, keep quiet…!’_ while we were quiet at the moment…! It wasn’t us who chatting at the moment.”

 

“Talking about another member of MMO, Kang Daniel-ssi was involved with an malfunction set several days ago, wasn’t it?” The DJ suddenly changed the topic into Daniel. Jisung’s smile almost froze up, “Ah, yes. That’s correct.”

 

“It seemed that _DASH!Idol_ ☆ was put on hold because of the incident.”

 

“That was really unfortunate,” Jisung managed to reply, “After all, it was a variety show with nice, new concept. Niel was really excited about the show. He told me that he really likes the game’s concept. It was unfortunate because the slide got a malfunction.”

 

“MMO didn’t sue the variety show, did they?”

 

“Oh, no. We didn’t. It was an accident, a terrible one.” Jisung shook his head, “It wasn’t actually my right to say about this matter, but MMO’s board of directors decided that it was truly an accident. We hope that the set and the props will be safer in the future, and after all the preparation finished, Daniel would join as the cast as planned.”

 

“…fans would have a pro and contra about that,” The DJ commented, “My, internet will explode for arguments! But thankfully, Kang Daniel-ssi is okay right? He went home from the hospital on the same day.”

 

“Yeah, he did,” Jisung nodded. Jonghyun joined the topic, “Seongwoo drived him home, right?” As it was on cue, the room were filled with chatters and agreement. “Ah yeah, Ong Seongwoo-ssi…!” The other DJ clapped his hand, “Another WANNA ONE member that had successfully charmed us with his acting. They spent a lot of time together after the incident, didn’t they? Kang Daniel-ssi will joined the drama as a cameo—Jisung-ssi, do you know what kind of role he was getting?”

 

Jisung laughed, “Sorry, but I really didn’t know!” 

 

“Really?”

 

“Really…! The drama’s staffs haven’t discuss about the role or send any scenario yet.” Jisung waved his hand like a fan, “Well, story writer-nim, please give our Niel-ah a good role for the cameo. Our precious child’ll be in your care.”

 

“Aaaww, Jisung eomma…!” The other leaders from the previous Dispatch’s interview clapped almost in unison. They have seen Jisung’s maternal conduct from the previous year. One of the new boy group’s leader commented, “Ah, I need a lot to study to be a good leader like Yoon Jisung-sunbaenim.”

 

“Even I envied his members for being so taken care of…!”

 

The whole radio session ended up with a light mood, and everyone was friendly with each other. Jisung was tired, so he slept during their way back to the MMO dorm. Youngsik Hyung drove quietly, letting Jisung got his proper rest. When they reached the parking lot, Youngsik tapped on Jisung’s shoulder and gently woke him up. Still half-drowsy, Jisung complied and yawned as he stretched his body.

 

“It’s still seven,” Youngsik asked him, “Do you want something to eat?”

 

“Let’s see if Daniel was home,” Jisung said after he pondered for a while. He had texted the younger male earlier, but his message was remained unread. It was either Daniel was staying at Seongwoo’s place, still on the practice room, or doing something else on the dorm. 

 

Their dorm was dark when Jisung and Youngsik entered the _hyeon gwan_. The automated lamp detected their movement and the LED lamp lit up a second later. They put their shoes to the cabinet and wore the indoor slippers. “Look’s like he was out?” Jisung commented, but he yelled Daniel’s name nevertheless. “Niel? Niel? Are you home—?”

 

He checked Daniel’s bedroom, and it was empty. Jisung went back to the living room, “He wasn’t home yet. Let me call his phone again.” 

 

So he dialed the number.

Again and again, it was connected to the voice mail. “Hmmm, that’s odd,” Jisung frowned. Daniel rarely being like this—unable to contact. He remembered that the younger male was supposed to visit Seongwoo’s place this afternoon for late lunch, so maybe he was still there with Seongwoo. It wasn’t the first time he was spending the night there; but just to make sure, he called Seongwoo’s phone since Daniel’s number was unable to be contacted. 

 

_Did his phone battery die…?_ Jisung wondered as he waited for his call of be picked up. The connection ringtone was finally stopped as Seongwoo finally picked up the call. “Hello? Seongwoo…?”

 

It was silence at first. Then a rasp, husky voice was heard on the other side of the line: “….Ji…sung…?”

 

Immediately, Jisung knew that something was wrong. Seongwoo’s voice sounded so broken and disoriented. Tried to calm himself, Jisung couldn’t help to feel a little bit panic. “Seongwoo? Are you okay…?”

 

There wasn’t any response for quite some time. Jisung’s temple started to throbbed. _Aish, this stupid couple must doing something stupid again._ “Seongwoo,” He changed his tone, demanded an answer from the actor, “….is Daniel there?”

 

“…no.” The answer was faint, then followed with a sobbing noise. Jisung started to paced himself, and Youngsik questioned him using his eyes. Jisung replied with a _don’t ask me, I’m confused as well_ look, took a deep breath before he asked again, “Did you guys fight?”

 

The sobbing noises became louder, and Jisung felt a really bad premonition. “Seongwoo,” He asked again because the raven haired haven’t answered the question yet, “Do you by any chance, confessed the truth to Daniel?”

 

“…Jisung,” Seongwoo’s voice got a really frighteningly fragile tone, “I messed everything up.”

 

_Dammit._

Jisung really want to said _I’ve told you that wasn’t a good idea_ , but it won’t do any good—it would just adding fuel to the fire. He sighed and rubbed his temple, the headaches throbbed as an annoying dull pain. 

 

“Jisung,” Seongwoo’s voice slowly called his name again, “…what should I do now—?”

 

Jisung wanted to shout _How do I know ah! I haven’t grasp the whole situation yet…!_ but he couldn’t do it. _This is one of the reasons I prefer to go serve my duty to the military instead. This stupid couple always gives me headache…!_ Being 28, he was supposedly enter the military service already—but the company forbid him to submit his apply request to buy some time before he was actually summoned for the duty. 

 

They didn’t re-debuted him into another group yet since they won’t know when he would been called, thus making him and Daniel worked mostly as an individual talent. While Daniel got a mini solo performance before; he was focused as model, spokesperson, guest to variety shows and occasionally collaborated with another singer/rapper. On the other hand, Jisung was mostly attended work as MCs, radio show’s guest and panellist for many variety shows. 

 

_But first thing first—_ “Well… Seongwoo?” Jisung sat on the sofa, hunched as he tried to knock some senses to the other male, “Calm down. Stop crying. Tell me what had happened in details.”

 

So Seongwoo did. He told Jisung about the lost ring. He summarized the part when he had slept with Daniel with _then we… did it_. Jisung raised his eyebrows and thought _Well, this is kinda TMI_ , “Go on.”

 

“I told him about the lies… and he was so angry with me.” Seongwoo paused for a second, “He said… that I betrayed him.”

 

Jisung sighed. _No wonder._ While Daniel was cheerful and loyal, he was absolutely hate being lied to. Well, no one like to be lied to, but in Daniel’s case it was his trust that completely shattered upon discovering the truth. The current Daniel didn’t remember much about the last three years and completely clueless about his relationships with Seongwoo. Yet he fell in love with the older male just like before, without knowing their real relationship before the amnesia occurred. 

 

“We need to find Daniel,” Jisung said, “It was the most important thing at the moment. I’ll try my best to find him. Seongwoo, please stop blaming yourself. Stop crying and try to calm down, okay? Don’t do anything dangerous or stupid, I beg you.”

 

“Mmm,” Seongwoo mumbled his okay, “Thanks, Jisung.”

 

After the call, Jisung sighed and leaned to the sofa, splayed his limbs as he suddenly felt so tired. His stomach rumbled and he was hungry as hell, but it wasn’t the time to lounging and eat peacefully. “Youngsik Hyung,” He called his manager, “We need to find Daniel.”

 

“I know,” Have been there and half-listening to Jisung’s conversation with Seongwoo, Youngsik got the gist of the situation already. “I’ve contacted the bodyguards.” _Ah, of course. I’ve forgotten the bodyguards._ Jisung remembered. Since there was two of them, whenever their schedule clashed, the one without Youngsik would be accompanied with the bodyguards.

 

“Not good,” Youngsik’s response after he received the replies, “One of them was absent today, but the other one accompanied Daniel from the practice to Seongwoo’s place. However, he didn’t know when Daniel left the building. He thought that Daniel was still up there on Seongwoo’s place.”

 

_Ah, f*ck—_ was the first curse appeared in Jisung’s mind. He was blinked away for a second, and this couple managed to create a mess. He worried about Daniel’s mental state at the moment. _He won’t do anything rash right??_ Else than the fight, Jisung also worried about Daniel being alone. His fanbase was so huge that whenever Daniel walks on public area, he would ended up looked like the pied piper of Hamelin. Without his bodyguards, he would surely be mobbed.

 

Jisung didn’t feel hungry anymore. His stomach were filled with uneasy feelings. “Youngsik Hyung,” He asked again, “Are there any fan posts about Daniel’s whereabout?” Idols often dreaded about the lacks of privacy, but the fan posts were Jisung’s hope at the moment—he really hoped that someone met Daniel somewhere and posted about it on SNS.

 

* * *

 

**@dafdaf**

[pics] 

Did I just see Kang Daniel?

**via twitter**

 

**@missfara** replied to **@dafdaf**

OMG I think you’re right! He was wearing the beanie and caps to cover his face, but his broad shoulder really gave him away! 

**via twitter**

 

**@khunkhun** replied to **@dafdaf**

Lucky you!! Where did you see him btw?

**via twitter**

 

**@dafdaf** replied to **@khunkhun**

I’m on Seoul’s Train Station :)

**via twitter**

 

**@avixiary** replied to **@dafdaf**

Wow, did you talk or say something to him? I really envy you!! I want to meet him IRL too //////

**via twitter**

 

**@dafdaf** replied to **@avixiary**

Sadly I only saw a glimpse of him :(  
I’m so excited tho, he is so handsome OMG 

**via twitter**

 

**@catchthesky** replied to **@dafdaf** and **@avixiary**

Do he even human?? Even covering himself like that, he still got the godly aura!

**via twitter**

 

**@ethelion**

[pics] [pics]

Kang Daniel spotted on the ticket machine area! I wonder where he’ll go to?

**via twitter**

 

**@nutaella** replied to **@ethelion**

He didn’t bring any self-camera, did he? IMHO It might be a personal trip.

**via twitter**

**  
** **  
@MirONGtic** replied to  **@ethelion**

It’s still his break period right? Maybe he planned to go back home to Busan?

**via twitter**

 

****\--

 

**[Pann]** I met someone looked like Kang Daniel on my express train to Busan. He was wearing a black beanie with similar colour mask to cover his face, so I couldn’t see his face clearly. He was sleeping against the window when I entered the cart. Sorry for the blurry picture, my seat is kinda far from his seat.

[pics]

 

[+182, -2] I think it was him alright. That broad shoulder really gave him away!

[+37, -1] Do you see any mole beneath his right eye? 

[+1,826, -31] I also think that it was Kang Daniel. Maybe he went home to Busan? 

[+45, -12] Look at that cute sleeping face! But he looked really tired tho :((

[+320, -18] Oh? He was alone? Do you see any bodyguards with him? Usually there were at least two near him nowadays.

 

* * *

 

It was a rather perfect timing; it was sunset when he exited the train station—the navy blue sky blended into indigo, the first stars of the night scattered and twinkled shyly, overpowered by the city lights. The horizon was burning in a deep crimson hue, the giant orange-red sun was occasionally hidden by the skyscrapers and other tall buildings as his taxi hit the road to his home.

 

Since it was still summer, the weather was hot and humid. Previously, there was another heatwave warning. The driver blasted the AC to the max setting, blowing the cold air to his skin. Daniel sat on the passenger’s seat, his backpack lied on the seat next to him. He was still wearing his beanie, but he had put his mask to his pocket earlier.

 

He was still looking on the streets, reminiscing how many stores and shops had changed from his memories, when the taxi driver greeted him, “Come back home?” The driver apparently recognized him. Daniel nodded politely, “Yes.”

 

“My daughter is a big fan of your group,” The driver said, “She used to bought goods and attended the concerts. Once, she skipped her supplementary lesson to attend an event.”

 

_Ooops?_ “Ah, I’m sorry about that,” Daniel apologized, eventhough it wasn’t his fault on the first place. The driver laughed, “Don’t be…! You know what, my wife attended the same event. They met on the venue. My wife couldn’t be angry at her at all. She made my daughter promised not to skip lesson anymore, and sometimes they went to attended another events together. People said they were an odd pair, being mother and daughter fangirling to the same idol band like that—but my daughter said so many of her friends envied her for it.”

 

Daniel laughed. He found it very interesting. Turned out that the mother was also WANNA ONE’s fans. The driver told him more about his wife and daughter’s antics, and truthfully it was amusing. Daniel’s mood went lighter as he laughed from the story. “Hey, may I ask for a favour?” The driver asked when the taxi stopped on the lane near Daniel’s place, “Could you give me your autograph? …and a photo, if I may—?”

 

He complied the request. He took a selfie with the taxi driver. He also gave him two autographs, writing the mother and daughter’s name on each paper. “Thank you,” The driver thanked him, “My wife and daughter would be crazy from this. They really like you and… who’s that kid with the rare surname? The one acted on the drama?”

 

Daniel’s heart went _thump._

“Ong Seongwoo Hyung?” He still offered, and the taxi driver’s face brightened. “Ah yeah. That kid with three moles. My wife and daughter really like the two of you guys. You two even got a CP’s name, right? Is it OngNiel—?”

 

This time, the _thump_ was followed by another hurtful pang. Daniel tried his best not to show his real emotion on his face, plastered a polite smile as he replied, “That’s right. It’s my honour to be loved by your family.”

 

The taxi driver blushed and laughed, patted his arm as he praised Daniel for being so kind and polite. “Thanks again,” He nodded before he started the taxi’s engine and drove away. Daniel waved at him, backpack on one of his shoulder. He waited until the taxi disappeared on sight, before walked along the lane to his home.

 

“…Daniel?”

 

His mother was opening the front gate as he approached home. She was holding a huge ecobag filled with groceries, almost dropped the bag down as she half-ran to hug her son. “Eomma…!” Daniel fastened his pace and opened his arm, his mother smaller figure fit comfortably in his embrace. His mother looked well, her outfit was neat and rather fancy. His mother still got the same scent as ever; she was wearing one particular perfume as long as he remembered. The lily scent was mixed with a faint scent of cats, and Daniel thought _Ah, it’s home._

 

“I’m here,” Daniel said as he grinned. His mother cupped his face and pinched his cheeks. “Aigoo, look at you. Why didn’t you tell me that you’re coming home? Where’s Seongwoo—?” The last question made him winced internally. “I wanted to surprise you,” He replied, still acted cute towards her, “I got some free time, so I thought I should go back home to see you and the cats.”

 

He didn’t say anything about Seongwoo, but his mother seemed to not notice about it. She was beyond ecstatic to welcome her only son home. “Come on in…!” His mother rushed in and unlocked their front door, “It’s been a while since you were home.”

 

Daniel smiled as he stared at his mother’s excited manner. “I’m home.”

 

* * *

 

While the outside decor of his home didn’t change much, the interior was quite different with the one in his memories. His mother had remodelled the floor using a newer wooden floor with central heating; it emitted a cool temperature during the summer since she set the cooling feature. The old and tattered wallpaper had been replaced with the new one, looked nice and elegant. The sofa had been changed into a big one shaped as an L; the corner seat was double functioned as a massaging sofa.

 

The corner ceiling was leaking before, but now it was fixed and styled with a decorated gypsum material on the border. The biggest change was their kitchen—the old kitchen had been replaced with a new one with minimalistic, stylish design. The countertop was lavished with dark granite slab, filled with a new gas range and microwave oven. Their old greyish fridge was changed with a smart one, huge double door with stainless surface and LED touch-screen panel.

 

The house looked unfamiliar yet familiar at the same time—there were new stuffs but he still recognized much of their old decors and furnitures. What surprised him the most was the fact that almost every corner was filled with his and Seongwoo’s memorabilia—posters and photos everywhere. She got a special display cabinet made of glass, complete with lighting fixture to showcase their albums and goodies.

 

Daniel took the picture frame displayed on the coffee table—the photo was familiar: it was the same photo Seongwoo displayed on his home. It was a photo of them three: his mother was smiling happily as Seongwoo hugged her shoulders affectionately, body half-leaned as he put both his hands on his mother’s shoulder. Daniel stood beside her mother, on the left side—his long arm wrapped around both of his mother’s and Seongwoo’s shoulders.

 

To think about it, there were traces of him at Seongwoo’s place. The photos. His clothes on Seongwoo’s cabinet. The shampoo. The toothbrush. The bowls and the mugs. It was all his. Traces of what he imagined as Seongwoo’s secret lover turned out to be his instead—because he was indeed, Seongwoo’s ‘secret’ lover. The older male even lied to such length to lie about the truth at him.

 

“Go rest at your room,” His mother said from the kitchen, “I’ll prepare dinner. I bet you miss Peter, Rooney, Ori and Zhang a lot.”

 

_Ori?_ _Zhang?_ He remembered his cats Peter and Rooney, but who’s this Ori and Zhang? 

 

The answer came meowed at him: a fluffy cream coloured cat with orange tinge and black marking. The unfamiliar cat looked excited, pounced onto his leg and grabbed it with a loud meow. The other cat, a smaller cat that fur was fluffy white, meowed as she followed the bigger cream coloured one. Peter and Rooney watched from the other side of the room—lazing comfortably on the cushion placed atop the cat tower, Rooney’s tail swished slightly as she meowed once. Daniel took the unfamiliar cats into his arms, and the cats’s glassy eyes stared straight at him.

 

The first cat’s coat marking looked like a Abyssinian, but he wasn’t so sure. The other one looked like a Maine breed. Knowing himself, he was pretty sure he adopted these cats from the same shelter he got his previous two cats. What’s the cat name again? Ori? Ori, as in _duck_? Did he named her based on the Russian Blue Cat from Keanu Reeve’s Constantine movie? He found the round metal name tag on the collar, and it was indeed the letter for duck engraved there. The other cat got the letter for sound effect _jjang_ —it was indeed also could be read as Zhang. 

 

While he was questioning his own naming sense, the cats greeted him. “Meow—“ The female cats nuzzled at his chest, purred loudly, and Daniel’s heart melted.

 

“Hello again, Ori, Zhang.”

 

* * *

 

He was playing with his cats when his mother called him for dinner. The dishes his mother cooked was all his favourites. Daniel was happy—it had been a while since he visited his mother and ate home cooked dishes like this. He ate it with so much gusto, his mother laughed, “Slow down. You’ll ended up chocking, eating like that.”

 

Her Niel-ah looked a little bit thin to her liking. She knew that the showbiz business prefers someone with leaner built, but Daniel was always the bulky one. Sturdy, not fat as in an obese person. He used to be a little bit more pudgy, but Daniel shed the extra pounds when he started to dance. After joined the show, he lost even more of his weight. Sometimes she wondered if the management really feed her son well.

 

His mother stared at her with gentle eyes. Daniel noticed that his mother hadn’t eaten yet, instead watched him eat. “Eomma, please eat as well,” He asked, still holding his rice bowl on one hand and chopsticks on the other hand. His mother smiled and took her own rice bowl as well, “Well, I’ll like to see you eat like this. Eat well, Niel-ah.”

 

“Hmm,” Daniel nodded. His mother filled his glass with water, “You came alone this time?” Daniel almost stopped chewing. He knew that his mother didn’t meant to ask about his manager or any bodyguards. She was asking about Seongwoo.

 

Looking at the posters and goodies in his home, especially their photos, Daniel guessed that his mother knew about their relationship. She probably had given them her blessing as well. His mother obviously often talk and ask about Seongwoo, the affectionate tone in her voice was way too clear.

 

“He was busy,” Daniel couldn’t say that they had a huge fight—and how the older male deceived him. He told his mother that his memories was kinda hazy and he forgot some things back then in the hospital, but he didn’t tell her that he was actually suffered amnesia and lost three years of his memories. His mother thought that he was okay and it was a minor concussion—Daniel didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth. He didn’t want her to worried about him more than necessary.

 

“Do Seongwoo still suffered from his anxiety?” His mother ask, and Daniel was surprised to hear it. _Anxiety?_ “I hope his depression wasn’t re-lapse,” His mother sighed as she ate a spoonful of soup, “What a pity. My heart aches whenever I remembered how a talented and kind-hearted youth like him suffered such issues. He was so polite and well-mannered, good looking as well—truly God felt he need to joke by making Seongwoo suffered like that.”

 

_What did just his mother said?_

_Anxiety?_

_Depression?_

_…Seongwoo?_

 

“But at least he accepted the rings,” His mother didn’t notice her son’s change of expression, “Though he didn’t wear it in public. I kinda understand though. He was so afraid for the scandal caused by those paparazzis. Netizen’s opinions were so harsh these days. Even dating became such scandal. Just like what happened to Hyuna and Pentagon kids from CUBE last year…”

 

“Eh?” Daniel was surprised about it. He recognized those names. Hyuna was obviously popular, but Pentagon was recently debuted on his last memories. “With who—?” He made a guess, “Hui-sunbaenim?”

His mother knitted her eyebrows and stared at him strangely—Daniel knew that he must had guessed wrong. “No,” His mother still stared at him sceptically, “With… E’dawn?” She mentioned another Pentagon member’s name. Daniel didn’t know what to comment, so he let his mother continued her ramblings, “Ah, it was chaos back then. Poor kids. To think they got so much hate for dating each other, even got their contracts terminated after they confessed the relationship…”

 

It was quite a shocking news. Daniel didn’t pay many attention to the current showbiz world as he was busy to re-learn his own dances and song, and most things he googled and searched was WANNA ONE, Seongwoo and himself related news. He wanted to ask more about Hyuna and E’dawn, but his mother might be suspicious of him if he asked about it—so Daniel made a mental note to search the news about it later.

 

Daniel ate the rest of his dinner almost in silence, lost in thoughts. His mother sensed his restless mood, but didn’t pry. She let him in his own thoughts. His mother mentioned about the rings—so it seemed that she knew about Daniel gave the rings to Seongwoo. Those were proposal rings… was Seongwoo actually replied him with a yes back then? The absence of memories of these kind of matters really frustrated Daniel. 

 

Do he want his memories back? Of course. 

Without a single doubt, he wanted to retrieve his memories back. It was hard to stay like this: being stranger of your own life and pretended that nothing was wrong. 

 

He was especially intrigued with the rings—he wanted to know what really happened. “The rings huh,” He mumbled faintly to himself, his mother couldn’t even heard it. That pair of rings were still stashed on his backpack at the moment, as he haven’t give it back yet to Seongwoo before their fight.

 

_Seongwoo…_

 

Daniel remembered the devastated expression. The tears. The plea. He remembered how he trembled, how he looked pained. How the older male held his hands tightly, refusing to let go. 

 

_“Please listen to me… Sorry Niel-ah… I was wrong… Please… Don’t leave—“_

 

He had cruelly left that day. He was angry, filled with rage and disappointment. He refused to hear Seongwoo out and accused him of betrayal.

 

_“Do Seongwoo still suffered from his anxiety?”_

_“I hope his depression wasn’t re-lapse.”_

 

His mother words replayed again inside his head, echoed—almost non-stop. If his mother knew about the mental distress, surely Seongwoo had suffered the illness for a long time. Daniel felt his heart ached. The older male’s sad face replayed again, broken hearted and filled with tears. 

 

_“Please listen to me…”_

 

But he had refused to listen.

 

_“Sorry Niel-ah… I was wrong…”_

 

Seongwoo had admitted his wrong doings, but he was furious back then—he hates to be lied to.But surely the older male had his own reasons… right?

 

_“Please… Don’t leave—“_

 

And he had left, just like that.

 

He went home to the dorm and packed some stuffs after he hastily decided that he wanted to go back home to Busan. He didn’t even contacted his bodyguard, or Youngsik Hyung, or Jisung Hyung. It had been hours. Daniel wondered if they noticed that he was away from Seoul. He hadn’t informed any of them yet. His phone battery had died during his way back to the dorm, and he hadn’t charge it yet.

 

Daniel excused himself after dinner, and took put his dead smartphone. He plugged the charger to the socket, then waited for a bit before turned his phone on. 

 

Messages and notifications filled his screen as soon as the phone connected to the network. He got so many miscalls and text messages—the majority was from Jisung and Youngsik Hyung. Several from other WANNA ONE member.

 

And there were some… from Seongwoo.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case you are wondering: CP = Couple Pair :D
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. If you did notice, I made an edit for Zhang as well. GDI Niel, you adopted so many cats XDXD


	16. I’m here, waiting for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _♪♫♬ In the end, some day, will you hold my hand?_  
>  Will you walk with me? ♪♫♬

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning Lovelies~~!!  
> It's another Monday morning, so here's the newest update :))
> 
> Btw I made some edits for the 15th chapter, so don't be surprised if you got a notification about that.  
> GDI Niel, I just included Ori to the fic and you adopted a new 4th cat already aaaaaaaaaaa--I need to revise my 15th and 16th chap because of it XDXD
> 
> Oh about the cats... Notice the tags? I added each one for them. The newest cat was named Zhang, and it was also written in 'jjang' word according to the fancafe CMIIW I wonder if he will add another cat to his family when he came back to Busan again in the future LOL

 

* * *

 

Daniel’s finger hovered upon the screen.

His heart went wild as he saw the notifications. _Thump thump thump—_ He felt giddy; he was still mad with the older male but he felt kinda guilty as well as he didn’t give any chance for Seongwoo to explain as well.

 

His cats sensed his mood—Being the oldest cat, Rooney jogged down from the windowsill and positioned himself on Daniel’s lap. She nuzzled her head on Daniel’s stomach, then settled quietly, letting Daniel petted her fur. Peter followed Rooney’s example, simply lied down on the carpet next to Daniel’s legs. 

 

Those huge amber and jade coloured glassy eyes stared at him—looked wise, as if the two of them were consoling him. Daniel smiled, ran his fingers on their shiny furs; his cats were obviously well-fed and a little bit pudgy around the stomach. Rooney meowed, then she started to purr.From the other side of the room, Ori trotted towards her younger sister. She sniffed Zhang for a couple of times, then lied on her stomach on the carpet next to the fluffy cat. The white cat was still the smallest of them four, and there’s something in her expression that always screamed _agyeo_. Ori seemed to like her, as the cream coloured cat started to licked Zhang’s fur in meticulous manner.

 

Daniel petted them for a while, giving them kisses and more nuzzles, then he decided to at least replying Jisung and Youngsik Hyung’s messages. He couldn’t be irresponsible and disappeared without any notifications. “Thanks,” Daniel kissed Rooney’s head one more time, then he put her back on his lap. Daniel took back his phone, unlocked it, winced as he saw how many miscalls he had received, then proceed to open the messages.

 

_Daniel_

_Where are you_

**_Jisung Hyung. 07:11 PM._ **

 

 

_Seriously_

_Don’t scare us_

_Where are you_

_Are you okay?_

**_Jisung Hyung. 07:12 PM._ **

 

 

_Daniel-ssi, please contact me back_

_Where are you?_

**_Youngsik Hyung. 07:11 PM._ **

 

 

_Tell me that you’re okay_

_You didn’t hurt somewhere, did you??_

_At least tell us where are you_

**_Jisung Hyung. 07:14 PM._ **

 

 

_Daniel_

_Where are you?_

_Are you okay?_

**_Minhyunie. 07:15 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel_

_Where have you go?_

_Please reply._

**_Jaenni. 07:15 PM._ **

 

 

_Daniel Hyung_

_Are you okay?_

_Please tell us that you’re okay_

**_Linlin. 07:17 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel-Hyung?_

_Where_

_Are_

_You?_

**_Busan Woojin. 07:18 PM._ **

 

 

_Are you okay?_

_Where are you?_

**_Jihoonie. 07:17 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel Hyung_

_This is Daehwi._

_Are you okay?_

**_Rihanna-ssi. 07:18 PM._ **

 

 

_Hyung_

_If you happened to read this, please tell us that you’re okay._

_We are worried about you._

**_Jinyoungie. 07:20 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel_

_Please reply to us._

_We are worried._

**_Minhyunie. 07:20 PM._ **

 

 

_I’m at Seongwoo’s place._

_Please do reply to him._

_To the very least, tell us where you are_

_and if you’re okay._

_He worried sick about you._

**_Minhyunie. 08:14 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel_

_Please contact us ASAP_

_Me and Minhyun are staying with Seongwoo_

_He’s NOT okay._

_Please._

_Reply._

_He need you._

**_Sungwoon Hyung. 08:20 PM._ **

 

 

As he read those messages, Daniel’s heart were repeatedly stabbed with painful pangs. Minhyun and Sungwoon Hyung’s message especially made him worried about Seongwoo. Daniel’s fingers trembled as he opened Seongwoo’s messages.

 

_Niel-ah_

_I’m so sorry_

**_Seongwoo. 05:32 PM._ **

 

 

_It was all my fault_

_Please don’t be mad with the others_

_I’m the one who begged them to stay quiet about the truth_

**_Seongwoo. 05:33 PM._ **

 

 

_I messed up everything, didn’t I?_

_Niel-ah_

_Daniel_

_I love you._

_I didn’t lie when I say it._

_I do love you._

_I always do._

**_Seongwoo. 05:34 PM._ **

 

 

_You see_

_I’m afraid_

_I’m—_

_I’m afraid of many things_

**_Seongwoo. 05:36 PM._ **

 

 

_Sometimes I’m afraid whenever I felt happy about us_

_It felt like I’ve sinned_

_Like_

_I’m not deserving this happiness I have with you_

**_Seongwoo. 05:37 PM._ **

 

 

_I’m so sorry_

_I meant it._

_It felt like I was robbing you_

_of your future_

_Coz you see_

_You used to date with girls before you fell for me, right?_

**_Seongwoo. 05:38 PM._ **

 

 

_Being with me_

_You won’t have a proper family._

_A wife._

_Kids._

_Normal family._

**_Seongwoo. 05:40 PM._ **

 

 

_With me, you could lose your whole career._

_You’ll lose your chance to be a proper guy with a happy family_

_When I thought that I might robbed your possible future_

_I was afraid_

_It wasn’t right to destroy your dream if you were stuck with me_

_I thought, if you wanted to move on_

_I should set you free_

_Coz that’s what people said right?_

_Let go of the one you love?_

_Set them free_

_and if they do belong to you_

_they’ll come back_

**_Seongwoo. 05:42 PM._ **

 

 

_I’m so sorry but_

_I was a fool._

_I just realized later_

_that I love you_

_and I need you_

**_Seongwoo. 05:32 PM._ **

 

 

_I rambled_

_Sorry, Niel-ah_

_It’s just_

_I want to explain_

_It’s okay if you are mad with me_

_I deserved it_

**_Seongwoo. 05:38 PM._ **

 

 

_I just wanted to tell you_

_that_

_eventhough you hate me now_

_eventhough you want to break up with me_

_I just want you to be happy_

_I’m sorry._

_I love you_

_Please forgive me._

**_Seongwoo. 05:32 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel-ah?_

_Where are you?_

**_Seongwoo. 07:10 PM._ **

 

 

_Jisung said that you’re missing_

_Please tell us that you are okay._

_Niel-ah_

**_Seongwoo. 07:12 PM._ **

 

 

_Where are you?_

_Sorry_

_You have the right to be angry with me_

_but please_

_Don’t disappear like this_

_You are okay, right?_

**_Seongwoo. 07:14 PM._ **

 

 

_Niel_

_Daniel_

_I’m worried_

_Please._

**_Seongwoo. 07:15 PM._ **

 

 

_Daniel_

_Where are you?_

_Are you okay?_

**_Seongwoo. 07:20 PM._ **

 

 

Seongwoo’s messages were sad and heart-breaking. It pained Daniel as he could sense how regretful the older male felt; also how worried Seongwoo about him. He remembered his mother’s words. Seongwoo got mental health issues. Anxiety and depression was no small matter—it was a silent killer that ended up so many lifes before. 

 

His own body moved like a reflect; he called Seongwoo’s number. After the first ring, the call was connected. A frantic Seongwoo called his name, “…Niel?!” His voice was hoarse and rough—he sounded like he was crying and wailing too much. Guilt burdened Daniel’s heart, he was mad at the older male—but couldn’t bring himself to hate him. “Yeah,” He replied, voice awkward. He coughed, “I’m okay. I… I just went back to Busan.”

 

Seongwoo didn’t reply immediately, but Daniel could hear his sigh of relief. He also heard Sungwoon’s voice in the background: _Do you want me to talk with him?_ followed with Minhyun’s voice: _Are you okay, Seongwoo?_

 

_I’m okay. Let me speak with him by myself._ Seongwoo muffled the phone, but Daniel could hear his voice. He sounded tired. The familiar pang prodded his heart again. Daniel waited for a while, and Seongwoo’ finally speak with him again. “When…” He hesitated, “…you will come back?”

 

“Tomorrow,” Daniel answered, almost rushed. “I’ll come back tomorrow.”

 

“…en.”

 

“Eomma said that she missed you.”

 

There’s a sharp gasp on the other line of the phone. It took two seconds for Seongwoo to replied, “I’ll call her later. Thanks for telling me.” His voice wavered, Daniel could heard the older male trembled. His chest were tight with mixed feelings: worry, guilt, longing and… love. He wanted to immediately ran back and went there to hug Seongwoo. He didn’t want the older male to be sad like this.

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” He called, almost too loud—Seongwoo sounded like he want to ended up the call. 

 

“…yes?”

 

“Let’s meet after I come back to Seoul,” Daniel told him. His own voice was shaken, almost on the verge of breaking. “Let’s… talk.” He asked, “I’ll listen. I’m sorry to for acting like that earlier.”

 

“You have the right to be mad at me.”

 

“But you deserved a chance to explain your reasons to me,” Daniel’s voice went rasp, “I’ve denied you about it.”

 

“…”

 

“See you… later?” it felt weird, to awkwardly conversed like this. It felt like a wall between them. “…okay,” Seongwoo replied, voice hushed down. Both of them still held the phone, no one ended the call. Daniel held his breath. He could hear Seongwoo sobbed. He could hear Sungwoon called Seongwoo’s name. There’s some noises—it sounded like Sungwoon hugged Seongwoo, repeated something that sounded like _It’s okay. It’s okay, Seongwoo._

 

The sound went faint, followed with a rather loud _thunk_. It seemed that Seongwoo dropped the phone. _It’s okay_ , He could hear Minhyun’s voice, _We found him. Niel is alright._ There was a lump in his throat when the call was ended from Seongwoo’s side. Daniel sat on the carpet, petrified as he wanted to know if Seongwoo was okay. 

 

_He was hurt because of me._

_He was crying…_

 

Rooney meowed from his lap. Peter put her paws on his thigh, followed Rooney’s cry. Those shrill meows sounded like A _re you okay? Don’t be sad. What happened?_ Daniel stroked their heads, bitterly smiled as he called Jisung next.

 

Just like the previous call, Jisung picked up the phone after the first ring. “DANIEL?” Jisung’s tone was filled with worry, “Where are you?!”

 

“Sorry Hyung,” He apologized, “I went back home to Busan. My phone died hours ago. I just charged it, so I just saw the messages and the miscalls a moment ago.”

 

Jisung sighed on the other side of the line. Daniel knew the sigh—Jisung must be on the verge on exploding, yet he tried to calm himself down. “Okay,” Jisung’s tone of voice was kinda stern, “When will you come back?”

 

“Tomorrow,” Daniel told him, “I’ll come back tomorrow using the express train.”

 

“Next time, tell us if you wanna go somewhere,” Jisung sounded like he was angry, yet Daniel could sense that the older male was worried and concerned about him, “Don’t just disappeared like that! You got bodyguards for safety matter, for God’s sake. Don’t just… parade away and ditched the one who supposed to protect you. It’s their job. He got scolded for your behaviour, do you know?!”

 

“I’m so sorry,” Daniel winced. He didn’t think about the matter. He just felt like he wanted to be alone, so he went back on his own. He totally forgot to notify his bodyguard, “It was my mistake.”

 

“Tell him that you’re sorry after you come back!” Jisung really sounded like a mom scolding her naughty son at the moment. Daniel accepted the scolding with a open heart, since he was indeed wrong. Informing his bodyguards about his schedule and his whereabouts were listed as number one priority on the instruction list Jisung gave him, yet he broke the rule.

 

“I will…. I’m so sorry, Hyung.”

 

* * *

 

It was a long night. 

The summer’s night felt nostalgic; it reminded Daniel of those days during his childhood, the familar burn scent of old fashioned mosquito coil were mixed with the citrusy smell of the tangerines. His mother often made tangerine jam, candies tangerine slices and pickled _chamoe_ , since those fruits were abundant during summer and sold cheaply.

 

Daniel helped his mother peeled the skin of a large batch of _chamoe_ using vegetable peeler—the inside flesh was white, tasted like the mixture of pear and melon. People also called it Korean Melon, though Daniel thought it was sure different from the original melon.The fruit was rather small—with yellow skin, ardorned with white stripes. It was surely different with the usual melon skin. 

 

The radio was playing some music on the background, so eventhough they didn’t talk much, there were songs that chased away the silence. It was comforting—Daniel was familiar with these kind of fruit preserving since his childhood. His mother’s fingers worked really fast; sliced the melon, removed the seeds, then cut the remaining flesh into cubes. Later she would boil them with water, sugar, white vinegar, and some spices like star anise, cinnamon and ginger. 

 

“Don’t forget to bring the kimchi and candied tangerine tomorrow when you come back to Seoul,” His mother reminded him, “I’ll send the _chamoe_ later after it was done. Remember to share with Seongwoo, he loves them.”

 

Daniel nodded, still peeling the skin of the _chamoe_ fruit. He worked almost in silence. His mother told him that the last time he went home, Seongwoo came with him as well. They helped his mother to pickle the tangerines and the _chamoe_. “Seongwoo was rather clumsy with knifes, but he boiled the ingredients well,” She told him.

 

Daniel tried to picture what his mother had told him, and easily imagined Seongwoo in front of the stove, boiling the ingredients using a big pot, ladle in hand. It was possible for him to wear his mother’s apron as well. He wanted to remember those moments—and after hearing his mother’s story, Daniel really want to see Seongwoo.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _When the long night comes_ _  
_ _I get lost again, without you_ _  
_ _I’m wandering in a dream I’ve never had before_ _  
_ _In a place without you, who can wake me up_ _  
_ _I’m here, waiting for you ♪_ ♫♬

 

On the same night, distances away, Sungwoon huffed as he poured some hot milk into the mug. His hair was dyed in flaming red colour this time, and he looked like he was on fire since he couldn’t stop fuming. “Stop that,” Minhyun sighed, “You do realize that Daniel didn’t completely at fault in this situation.”

 

Sungwoon sighed as well. “Aish, I didn’t know how Jisung could be so patient with these two.”

 

On the living room, Seongwoo was sitting on the sofa. He was staring blankly to the wall, his eyes were red and kinda swollen from crying. The music from the speaker were rather mellow, [the song was sang by Eddie Kim for Bae Suzy’s drama](https://open.spotify.com/track/5LiWJsSSjZh7Y3hqml18Ki?si=rs--at54RTSWy_XPrQFaJQ). The sorrowful ballad made Sungwoon worried about Seongwoo’s feelings, but the raven haired seemed to enjoyed the song. Minhyun gave his former roommate a look, and Sungwoon shrugged his shoulders before approached Seongwoo and gave him the warm milk.

 

“Drink this.” He said, and Seongwoo nodded—reacted almost mechanically. He took a sip, paused for a second, then took another sip. “Thanks Hyung,” Seongwoo murmured. He was holding the mug using both hands. Stared at the white mug with cats pattern, Seongwoo’s tears fell again.

 

Sungwoon and Minhyun were startled. “Seongwoo…?” Minhyun’s brow knotted, “Are you alright?” Seongwoo just gave them a small, forced laugh. “I’m okay,” He said, sounded like a total lie. “No, really. I’m fine—“

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _I need your love, take me away_ _  
_ _I need you now, hold me tight_ _  
_ _In the lost memories, I’m crying alone_ _  
_ _I need your love, in your arms_ _  
_ _I need you now, hold me tight_ _  
_ _Only you can wake me up ♪_ ♫♬

 

The mug Sungwoon gave him was Daniel’s mug. The red haired didn’t know about the matter. Of course, it should be not a big deal—but holding Daniel’s mug like this reminded Seongwoo about his foolish mistake all over again.

 

“I messed everything up, didn’t I?” He sniffled, tried his best to held back his tears. Both Sungwoon and Minhyun didn’t dare to reply. Earlier that day, Seongwoo’s message to the group chat came like a sudden storm.

 

_I messed everything up_ , his message sounded so eerie, so desperate. They immediately asked him about what happened, and if he was alright. Then Seongwoo told them that Daniel was missing—Jisung couldn’t reach him at all. Through the tears and trembling fingers, he typed up the confession; about what had happened between him and Daniel.

 

He was shaking uncontrollably, his heart pounded loudly against his ribcages and he was sweating bullets—the cold sweats damped his shirt and he felt chilled all of the sudden. He went into full panic mode and started to hyperventilate. Jisung, whom familiar with Seongwoo’s ilness since they were roommates before, was scheduled for another variety show later as one of the panelist; so he immediately told the WANNA ONE group chat if anyone was currently free, please come to Seongwoo’s place to accompany him. As most of them got a schedule that day, only Minhyun and Sungwoon were able to came.

 

It was Sungwoon who reached the apartment first, punched the code in and found Seongwoo liedon the middle of the living room, his body hunched into a fetal position, still shaking violently. He looked so pale and it frightened the HOTSHOT member. Seongwoo’s breath was shallow, his heartbeats were faster than normal, and he kept clutching his chest as it felt so tight—his head felt light and Sungwoon was afraid as Seongwoo looked like he was about to faint. The red haired thought of calling 119, but luckily a few minutes later Minhyun arrived and took control of the situation.

 

The Nu’est member tried to calm Seongwoo—patted his back and gave him the order to breathe slowly, then exhale through his mouth. “Calm down,” Minhyun repeated those two words, over and over. It felt like forever and Sungwoon really wanted to shake Minhyun, urged him to call for paramedics instead. But after a while, Seongwoo finally calmed down and his breathing was slowly turned normal. He was hiccuping for a few times, but at least he looked better. Sungwoon sighed of relief, his legs gave out as he slouched on the carpet. “You scared me,” He said, concerned.

 

Seongwoo was still lied down, his body felt like a boneless goo. He felt so tired and his body was covered in sweats. Minhyun and Sungwoon let him lied motionlessly like that for half an hour, then Sungwoon was the first one to broke the silence.

 

“Let’s change your clothes,” He said. The fabric was damp and Seongwoo would get sick if he still wearing it for a longer period, “Do you want to take a bath? I’ll prepare the water. You still got those bath bombs I gave you before, right?”

 

Seongwoo looked dazed, and it took a couple of seconds before he awkwardly nodded. “Hmm,” was all he said. His lips were still slightly trembling, his complexion was still ashen—and he started shivering again as he suddenly felt cold. A warm bath sounded like a good idea. Minhyun helped him up as Sungwoon dashed into the bathroom.

 

He filled Seongwoo’s bathup with warm water, slightly scalding hot. Sungwoon found the bath bombs he gave Seongwoo before on the bathroom cabinet, still unopened. Sungwoon opened the package and took one with blue colour. The package listed sea salt and some herbs that promotes to calming the nerves such as Valerian and Bergamot, with a hint of peppermint. He put it on the water, and the rounded ball started to dissolve—creating swirling pattern of white, light blue and some streaks of green.

 

The aroma filled the bathroom right away, and they helped Seongwoo undressed. Both Minhyun and Sungwoon noticed the red marks on Seongwoo’s necks and torso; scattered like small petals of flowers on his skin. Yet they didn’t say anything. With shaky legs, Seongwoo entered the bathup and sat quietly—he was closing his eyes and mouthed an inaudible _thank you, guys_. 

 

Later when the water had turned lukewarm and Seongwoo’s fingertips had turned wrinkly, Minhyun knocked the door again. “You’re good?” He asked, and Seongwoo nodded, “I’ll coming out in a few minutes.”

 

He stepped out from the bathup, drained the water, then proceed to dry himself with the fluffy towel. Sungwoon had placed a pyjamas on the counter. To Seongwoo’s amusement, Sungwoon mistakenly gave him Daniel’s instead of his. The pyjamas was baggy on his figure, but Seongwoo wore it anyway—and opened the door. Minhyun was still typing something on his phone when Seongwoo came out of the bathroom. Sungwoon noticed him, “Do you want some warm milk?”

 

Seongwoo just nodded.

Then, just after Sungwoon took the pan and the milk from the fridge, Daniel’s call came without any premonition.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _After the long night passes_ _  
_ _I lose all meaning, without you_ _  
_ _I’m still waiting for you_

_I’ll wait for you here forever_

_I’ll wait for you ♪_ ♫♬

 

So here he was now, sitting on the sofa. His skin felt soft and he felt a lot better after the bath, but the restlessness won’t go away. He held Daniel’s mug, his point finger traced the cat pattern, wondering about the blonde haired.

 

_“Let’s meet after I come back to Seoul,”_ Daniel’s words echoed inside his mind, _“Let’s… talk.”_

 

Seongwoo wondered about how Daniel react when they finally met. The younger male probably calm and stoic. He believed that Daniel would listened to him, just like he promised. He would let Seongwoo rambled, didn’t interrupt the mess the actor sprouted. Seongwoo wondered if he would stutter when he talk to Daniel later—if he would made a fool of himself by butchering his story into something messy and sounded like lame excuses.

 

Seongwoo wondered if Daniel would say that he forgives him… then ask for a proper break up.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _In the end, some day, will you hold my hand?_

_Will you walk with me? ♪_ ♫♬

 

* * *

 

  

_ Say Hello to Zhang/Jjang~ Current Kang family's maknae~ _

_ (And look, Mama Kang really have the glass cabinet for display ehehehe~~) _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is Eddie Kim’s “긴 밤이 오면 /When Night Falls/When A long Night Comes” [spotify link here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5LiWJsSSjZh7Y3hqml18Ki?si=rs--at54RTSWy_XPrQFaJQ)
> 
>  
> 
> More about the preserved tangerine/orange, please check [ here and ](http://www.savvyeat.com/candied-orange-slices/)[here.](https://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/type-of-dish/preserves/spiced-preserved-tangerines)
> 
> And this one for the Chamoe [here.](http://500sandwiches.com/post/88567572221/pickled-korean-melon)


	17. If you’re fine with me, I’ll give you my everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel wondered if that attraction was the result of his procedural memory—something embedded in him, without conscious effort, some form of muscle memory… or he was actually fell in love at the first sight, all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, lovelies~~!!  
> Here's another update, I hope it will sweetened your day :D
> 
> Btw, if you want please do put [this song](https://soundcloud.com/brentbourgeois/when-hearts-are-broken) before you reading the chapter :))

 

* * *

  

_♪_ ♫♬ _Am I human or am I too afraid_

_Is this human to know and be in pain_

_When hearts are broken open_

_The colour in our pain is brought to life_

_The world is something more than black and white and broken ♪_ ♫♬

[ **When Hearts are Broken Open — Alex G & Giulio Cercato** ](https://soundcloud.com/brentbourgeois/when-hearts-are-broken)

 

* * *

 

Daniel’s train reached Seoul around 8 in the morning.

The station wasn’t as crowded as the busy hour, but there were still many people there. There was a large group of teenagers in uniforms, seemed like they were high school students—from the bags and the uniforms, it seemed that they were on a study tour to Busan. They were high-spirited and cheerful, eager to visit the town.

 

Daniel wore his cap and mask, but he didn’t want to take the risk of them recognizing him—it would be chaos. Youngsik Hyung was waiting for him on the west exit, so he pulled his cap even lower and walked away; the backpack on his back was heavy with his mother’s _banchan_ dishes. His mother packed him the candied tangerines and a huge sealed container of kimchi as well. 

 

_“Send my regards to Seongwoo as well, Niel-ah.”_ His mother had said earlier as she hugged him farewell, and Daniel nodded in return. His mother still slowly waved her hands even after Daniel entered the taxi—her figure looked smaller and smaller in the distance. Daniel felt a lump in his throat—he was missing his mother already. But he need to go back to Seoul, so he pulled his cap lower and keep his silence along the way. The taxi driver didn’t say anything to him, merely turned up the radio and the whole journey was filled with Busan’s morning radio programme.

 

Daniel was on his way to the Seoul station’s exit gate when he saw a stall. The stall felt oddly familiar; a rather old _ahjussi_ with white hair and kind eyes was selling _gyeran bbang._ There were several other toppings available for the egg bread, such as sliced mushroom, sliced cherry tomatoes, hams, sausages, even chopped octopus. The smell was so delicious and mouth watering, and it was awfully familiar—

 

_“Hey, let’s get some of that…!”_

_Seongwoo pulled the hem of his sleeves, navigated them towards the stall. Half of his lower part of the face was covered with a black surgical mask, but his eyes were sparkled and Daniel could see the big pleading grin behind the dark fabric that covered the older male’s mouth. “Come on…!” The raven haired nudged him again, pointing at the stalls, “I want the one with the sausages…!”_

 

_Daniel, pulling their wheeled luggage, only laughed at the latter’s childish antics. “Sure,” He complied, jogged along his roommate, “I want the one with the extra ham.”_

 

_“Give me a taste of it later, okay Niel-ah?” Seongwoo asked, and Daniel nodded, “Gimme a taste of yours in return, okay Seongwoo-ya?”_

 

After hesitating for a bit, Daniel took some steps to the stall.

The _ahjussi_ behind the counter was still the same _ahjussi_ from their previous purchase. “Excuse me,” Daniel greeted him, and the _ahjussi_ put down the newspaper he read. “Yes, young man?” Daniel politely smiled as he placed his order, “One with sausages and one with ham, please.”

 

* * *

 

Morning came quietly at Seongwoo’s apartment.

As Sungwoon took care of him but created trail of mess as he proceed to warm the milk and preparing the pyjamas, Minhyun quietly tidied all the mess—He washed the dishes, wiped the counter, sweep the floor, washed the bathup, refolded the towels and even sorted the trash. His apartment was spotless thanks to Minhyun, though Seongwoo felt that the immaculate, model house-like vibe made the whole apartment felt cold and somewhat lifeless.

 

Seongwoo was thankful to the two of them nevertheless, and he was feeling slightly guilty as the two of his former members went home so late eventhough they got an early schedule for today. _“Thanks guys,”_ Seongwoo assured the two of them that he would be fine, _“I really appreciated your TLC for me.”_

 

Seongwoo wake up before the alarm, alone in his bed. His eyes were puffy as he forgot to compressed them after crying so much the previous night. He need to shoot his drama later in the afternoon, so Seongwoo stepped out from his bedroom and slowly walked to the kitchen—opened his fridge, silently took the ice cubes from the tray, put them into a ziplock bag and wrapped it with a linen cloth. He put it on his eyes; the icy cold temperature sting his skin.

 

“Hhhhh…” 

 

Seongwoo breathed through his mouth. He took another deep breath, and exhaled slowly. It was awfully quiet now—the small of Seongwoo’s back was leaning against the granite countertop. He could hear his own breathing. There weren’t any the sounds of birds chirping or the static noises of traffics from the streets as he haven’t opened the east side’s french doors panel that led to the balcony yet. When all the doors and windows were sealed, any sound was soundproofed thanks to the thick and double sided materials. 

 

The silence made him restless. Seongwoo remembered his last conversation with Daniel. _“Let’s meet after I come back to Seoul,”_ The younger male said via the phone last night, _“Let’s… talk.”_ Seongwoo held his breath; the restlessness turned into fear. Daniel said that he would listen. But it was a possibility that the younger male won’t forgive him for what he have done. Seongwoo knew Daniel absolutely hate being lied to.

 

_“You deceived me,”_ Daniel had told him, _“You betrayed me.”_

 

There were thousands of scenario ran inside his head; Seongwoo imagined how Daniel would behave, what would Daniel response, what would Daniel say to him. In one of the scenario, Daniel would looked apathetic, somewhat tired. In other scenario, Daniel would looked as he was lost in thought. In the other scenario, Daniel would stared straight at him—there were traces of disgust there. All of the scenarios inside his head would ended with “Let’s break up.” 

 

Seongwoo pressed the ice harder to his eyes. He was fighting the urge to cry—he shouldn’t. He remembered Daniel’s stern words: _“Stop crying…! Don’t try to fix everything with tears, Hyung.”_ Daniel was right. He was weak. His tears meant nothing. He shouldn’t cry for something he caused by his own mistakes. He was in fault when he decided to lie. The lie went bigger and bigger, snowballed and when Seongwoo wanted to redeem his mistakes, it was already too late.

 

_It was your own fault_ , the sneering voice came in a hideous dark shadow—creeped behind him, perched on his shoulder. Seongwoo wanted to deny it, but it was true. He made the mistake. He lied. It was his fault from the first place. 

 

_“It was really one sided decision from you, wasn’t it?”_ Daniel words from the previous night echoed back, _“Because you were afraid of something, and it mattered more than me. Mattered more than our relationship.”_

 

The unsettling shadow chuckled in triumph. Seongwoo winced as he felt a headache coming. His neck and shoulder felt stiff. _And he was right, wasn’t he? You keep making excuses. You were afraid to love him. You didn’t want him to love you, did you?_ Seongwoo’s fingers trembled. “No,” He whispered weakly, “I love him. I want him to be happy. I’m—“

 

_Oh yeah?_ The hideous shadow creeped upon him, growing bigger and bigger, _Did you forget what he had told you before, Seongwoo-ya? You choose to lie to him. You had deceived him. You tried your best to ditched him, to cut him from the relationship that he didn’t know existed. You betrayed him at his lowest, how cruel of you Seongwoo-ya…_

 

“No…”

 

Seongwoo started to trembled. The bags of ice fell, created a loud _thunk_ as it hit the floor. Seongwoo curled his body into a ball, tried to regulate his breath as he put his head between his legs. “No…” He repeated, feeling light headed. He was getting another panic attack. Seongwoo tried to inhaled a longer breath, slowly exhaled through his mouth.

 

“No—“ He pressed his head, the throbbed pain felt terrible on his temples. Daniel’s words echoed again, cut deep like a razor: _“I looked up to you—I love you… and you betrayed me.”_

“But I love you,” Seongwoo mumbled, “I just want to give back a chance I took from you. I just… want you to have a future that could be yours…”

 

The dark shadow roared, _Another excuses. Full of excuses, aren’t you?_ Seongwoo shook his head weakly, his heart beats rapidly. “No… It’s not an excuse… I do love him… truly…”

 

“Seongwoo-ya.”

 

A pair of hand circled his body. They felt warm, and yet Seongwoo flinched from the touch. His back slammed against the kitchen counter as he pulled his body backwards from the embrace. His pupils were shaking, and he looked like he couldn’t recognize the figure whom kneeled in front of him, a worried expression plastered on the latter’s face.

 

“Wha—“ Seongwoo stuttered, “…how—?”

 

“I rang the bell,” Daniel reached onto him again, gently put his palm on Seongwoo’s arms, “But you didn’t respond for a long time. So I punched the code and let myself in.”

 

Seongwoo still blankly stared at Daniel. He felt like it was one of his delusion—a cruel fantamorgana. He wondered if the one kneeled in front of him was the real Daniel or a mere mirage created by his broken mind. Seongwoo double blinked, his mouth gaped as he still trying to regulate his shallow breath and rapid heartbeat. 

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel called his name. Seongwoo stared at the younger male in a daze. The fingers touched his arms felt warm and real. Daniel helped him up, took the ice bag and guided Seongwoo onto the sofa. He put the ice bag to Seongwoo’s hand after the older male had seated. “Jihyo Noona told me that your shooting will take place later…right? You need to compress your eyes so they won’t as puffy.”

 

Seongwoo nodded, pressing the ice bag against his eyes once again. Daniel gave him a small smile as he waived two small brown paper bag in front of him. It smelled heavenly, with some patches of grease dotted the paper. “Have you eaten yet, Seongwoo-ya?”

 

Seongwoo froze for a second, then awkwardly shook his head. He couldn’t say anything yet—there was a lump grew inside his throat, amplified with a fear that everything was surreal and Daniel would gone like a puff of magic if Seongwoo said a word, any word. 

 

“Here’s yours,” Daniel took Seongwoo’s free hand and put one of the paper bag on his palm, “It still warm enough, so I don’t think we need to re-heat it.” 

 

Seongwoo hesitated, then he put down the ice and unfolded the brown takeaway paper bag. “This—“ he gasped, finally talk after a while. Now Seongwoo really felt like crying—the rim of his eyes turned redder, yet he tried to hold back the tears. The memory from their past surfaced: they were still in WANNA ONE and they went home secretly to visit Eomma. They were younger, and he was more carefree back then. 

 

Inside the bag was a _gyeran bbang_ with extra sausages topping.

 

Just like the one he choose back then on their way back at Seoul Station.

 

* * *

 

Daniel ate his own portion of _gyeran bbang_ in a few big bites. 

Seongwoo on the other hand, ate his with a slower pace. He ate quietly, lowered his gaze to the half-eaten bread on his hand; as if he was afraid to actually look at Daniel. The younger male didn’t probed Seongwoo about it. He went to the kitchen, filled their mugs with water and gave the black one to Seongwoo, placing the mug on the coffee table in front of him. Seongwoo nodded slowly, paused for a second as he glanced on the black mug with white cat patterns.

 

The raven haired looked so fragile at the moment. Daniel recognized the oversized pyjamas the older male wore—it was his. The pyjamas was so loose, baggy on Seongwoo’s leaner built. The Fantagio actor was still pale, with slightly puffy eyes, the rims were still red. It looked better after being compressed, and Daniel wondered if they need to change the ice since the one currently used was somewhat melted into a huge watery mess. 

 

“Seongwoo-ya…” Daniel tried to call the latter’s name. His tone was gentle, but Seongwoo flinched in response. His reaction made a deep cut in Daniel’s heart—Seongwoo looked restless, afraid of something. Daniel didn’t know what to say at the moment, so he took his backpack. Just as he took the black bag from the floor, Seongwoo’s eyes widened. “Don’t leave—!” 

 

Daniel felt another guilty pang on his heart. “I’m not leaving,” He gently said, “We haven’t talk yet. I’ve promised you.” Seongwoo blushed as he realized that he misunderstood Daniel’s conduct. The younger male took something from inside the bag: Eomma’s pickled _chamoe, kimchi_ and some side dish. He put the containers on the coffee table, “Eomma told me to give them for you.”

 

“…thank you.”

 

It was awkward between the two of them. They behaved reservedly, as if there was an invincible wall between them. Daniel remembered even during their first meeting back then on the hospital, the awkward feeling was never there. True that it wasn’t Seongwoo first time meeting him, since it was Daniel whom forgotten his three whole years due the memory loss; but back then when he saw Seongwoo, he felt at ease with him. It felt _clicked_ , he was really comfortable with the older male, and actually delighted when Seongwoo drove him home from the hospital.

 

Daniel remembered that back then, he was attracted to Seongwoo strongly. It wasn’t just because the actor got a handsome face, but there was something in his bearing—something attracted Daniel from within, not just a skin deep. Back then, Seongwoo kept a poker face. Yet, Daniel could see a glimpse of melancholy on his eyes—Seongwoo must be pained inside, contemplating his decision to hide their relationship status from him.

 

Daniel wondered if that attraction was the result of his procedural memory—something embedded in him, without conscious effort, some form of muscle memory… or he was actually fell in love at the first sight, all over again.

 

If it was the latter option, it felt like a cliche troupe of fate or destiny. _It was you, it was always you, always been you. I fell in love over and over again, not knowing the truth between us… yet I fell for you because it was the way it is: the right way to do, the most natural thing, the answer for destiny—intertwined by the red strings of fate._

 

The current Seongwoo, the one sat in front of him, was fragile. He almost seemed broken, traumatized. Daniel remembered his mother words; the actor got anxiety and depression. It seemed that he didn’t reach for any professional help—and it was alarming for Daniel. He wondered if his former self, the one before the accident, loves Seongwoo so much that he endured all the older male’s antics during his re-lapse and paranoid episodes; believing that one day, someday, his lover will somewhat cured if he was able to convinced him enough.

 

“…what do you want to talk about?” Seongwoo killed the silence. He asked in a cautious, tired tone. But for the first time after their lingered morning, Seongwoo was able to see Daniel straight in the eyes. There were sorrow and doubt on those orbs, dark and watery like a deep bottomless pond.

 

“I want to talk about us.” Daniel replied, “I want to hear your reason… why did you hide the truth of our relationship and tried your best to convince that I’m not your lover.” 

 

Seongwoo flinched once again. He lowered his gaze, face uncertain. The actor started to fidget using his fingers, “I’ve told you this before, the truth was… we got a huge fight the day before the accident.” Seongwoo’s voice was faint, soft as a whisper. He closed his eyes, those brows furrowed, knitted in pained expression. “I forgot why we fought in the first place,” He contInued, “Stupid as it was, I made a huge fuss of something mundane. I was cranky and irritable that day, and somewhat I lashed it out on you.”

 

He paused for a while, his voice wavered. “We fought for the same, old problem,” Seongwoo chuckled in irony, “Just like we did hundreds of time before. I talked about our relationship as if it was a sin to bury, a hush hush matter. You told me that I was being too paranoid and everything would be okay. You told me that people with understand, that there will be people that acknowledge our love, our relationship. I retaliated, I asked about the people who wouldn’t and won’t understand. The self-righteous. Majority of the netizen, the fans, was judgy. They wait for a moment of us slip, doing a mistake, and they would use it to destroy us. Destroy our love, pur career, our life…”

 

There were another pause. “You said that what matter was our true feelings. Our bond. I challenged you again by bringing out those cases—of them whom career and life destroyed just because they were in a relationship. I brought up Hyuna and E’dawn, because Guanlin still mentioned them from time to time and we knew their hardships almost firsthand. They are a heterosexual couple, yet they got so much problem for being together. I yelled at you, that we were in a deeper mess as we were against the norm. We were a couple that wasn’t the conventional male and female couple, it would be a big, huge scandal if they knew about us.”

 

Tears pooled on Seongwoo’s eyes, and he sighed as he wiped them immediately. “Then we argued. We fought. I blurted something I regretted so much, I said that I couldn’t live such a life. I said that I got enough of your positive view of things. I called you stupid for being so optimistic. I’m so sorry… I’m really sorry… Niel-ah…”

It pained Daniel to saw those tears. “Seongwoo-ya…”

 

“Back then you looked so… betrayed. I hurted you with purpose, just because I was angry and I dumped it all on you. I said…” Seongwoo’s voice wavered again, “I said that it would be better if we never met. That we won’t fall in love. That we won’t be in such risky, scandalous relationship. A time bomb, I said, ticking each second—waiting to explode. Then…”

 

Seongwoo couldn’t speak more of it. His shoulders trembled as he tried his best not to cry. “You said… You said to me… ‘ _So you don’t want me, then?’_ I couldn’t say anything. I’ve always take you for granted. I made you my punching bag so many times, and you endured them for my sake. You keep forgiving me and I was so blind that I keep repeating my mistakes on you. You… finally have enough that night. You gave me your ring—“

 

Seongwoo palmed his face, tears streamed down his face. He remembered that night, Daniel’s broken tone. _“You can keep mine. Throw it away for me.”_ The rings. Seongwoo kept them, and like karma, they were missing. He had lost them.

 

“I thought—“ He lost the battle as he couldn’t stop crying, “You must got enough of me. I should set you free, letting you to move on. I need to give you back your life, your future. Without me, you could have a proper wife, a family with your biological kids. I thought… I should—“

 

Daniel rushed to his side, pulling Seongwoo into his embrace. The older male was surprised for the hug, but then Daniel’s scent enveloped him. It smelled like pine and sandalwood, with a traces of the sweetness of coconut. It smelled like a save haven, a sanctuary, familiar and warm and filled with longing feelings. The embrace felt like something unconditional. It felt like home, something he could return and bare himself.

 

“I got them,” Daniel confessed. For a moment, Seongwoo’s mind was blank. He couldn’t understand what Daniel had said. “The rings,” Daniel’s eyes looked apologetic, dark irises sparkled with overwhelming feelings, “I saw them before. I loathed the fact that you got those rings from your mysterious lover, someone I didn’t know, someone I felt would take you away from me. I want you to ditched your lover, to be with me… I din’t know that I was being jealous with myself. Sorry for the rings, I kept them from you.”

 

“Ha—“ Seongwoo’s lips curled upwards. He was crying, but he started to chuckle. “Hahaha—“ He laughed; it was silly—Daniel acted impulsively because he was being jealous of himself. And he was relieved that he didn’t lose the rings. 

 

“I’m so sorry,” Daniel apologized, “I didn’t tell you right away about the rings. Even when you broke down the other day when you thought that you lost them.”

 

“I’m sorry too,” Seongwoo still laughing while crying, “I’m so sorry that I lied to you. I was wrong to deceived you like that.”

 

Then, it was another silence. 

Seongwoo was wondering if Daniel would say his words—that he ask for a proper break up after they sorted up the mess. Daniel’s fingers touched his cheeks, and Seongwoo was still in daze. Suddenly, something touched his lips.

 

Daniel kissed him.

It was a tender, whole-hearted kiss. It was devoid of anger or any negative emotions. It was simply a longing, adoring kiss. Daniel’s lips felt soft against his own. Daniel kissed him with the gentleness of a spring’s breeze, with the saccharine sweetness of first love’s kiss.

 

“…why?” Seongwoo asked when their lips were finally parted. _Why did you kiss me? It wasn’t the last kiss before the final farewell, was it…?_

 

“Why?” Daniel asked him back, “Why did you need to ask…? Seongwoo-ya… I love you.” He leaned in and kissed Seongwoo again. “I love you so much, no matter what.” He mouthed as he deepened the kiss.

 

They kissed like there were no tomorrow. It felt right, perfect—the right way as it should be. Daniel’s fingers cradled Seongwoo’s neck and the backside of his older male’s head. Hungrily, he kissed the raven haired passionately. Every kiss was dominated with an euphoric emotions: _mine, you’re mine_ , making the two of them breathless and light-headed _._

 

“Niel-ah,” Seongwoo mouthed between the kiss, “I need to go to my drama’s location later.” Daniel, still holding Seongwoo’s waist, smiled as he leaned in once again to close the gaps between their lips. “I know,” he replied as he bit Seongwoo’s lower lip teasingly, slowly kneaded the latter’s lips with his own.

 

_If you’re fine with me, I’ll give you my everything._

 

Daniel had said it before to Seongwoo, and he meant it.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And nope, it wasn't over yet fellas~!!  
> There will be more of them, after all we cannot leave our OngNiel ended just like this rite? /wink
> 
> Prepare your kokoro for next chapters.  
> Coz there will be fluffs. So much fluffs after all these angst ˉ̞̭(′͈∨‵͈♡)˄̻ ̊
> 
> \---  
> More about gyeran bbang: [here](https://twitter.com/mizuno_hikaru/status/1056723213995126784)  
> You can made your own following [this recipe.](https://mykoreankitchen.com/korean-style-egg-bread/)


	18. Seongwoo-ya, I keep falling for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I accepted the cameo offer because I want to act again with Seongwoo-Hyung.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~~!  
> It's time for another chapter--you guys must have enough of the angst (LOLZ) so here's some fluffs for today's chapter ^^
> 
>    
> P.S. There's a 'cameo' on this chapter LOLZ

 

* * *

 

 

**[Pann]** OP worked as The Summer’s Constellation drama’s set maker. She said that today Kang Daniel came again to the set. He came with Ong Seongwoo, the two of them kept joking together and laughed. She wasn’t a fan, but she said that from today on she will be his loyal fan. OP described that Kang Daniel was really good looking IRL even without his make up. His body build was great and he got an aura that really sucked you in. OP also stated that Kang Daniel was really polite and greeted the staffs nicely.

**[pics] [pics] [pics] [pics]**

 

[+1,263, -32] OMO OMO—sorry I got distracted BUT KANG DANIEL WAS HOLDING ONG SEONGWOO’S WAIST ON THE PICS (´ 。 ✪ ω ✪ 。｀ ) MY SCIENTIST KOKORO JUST CANNOT— 

[+304, -2] Whoa, look at Kang Daniel standing beside Ong Seongwoo like that. He practically pulled his hyung to lean on him, look at his hand circled around Seongwoo’s waist! ( ๑ ˃̶͈̀o˂̶͈́ ๑ )

[+429, -14] I’M SCREAMING AT THE MOMENT \\(●⁰ ౪ ⁰●\\)(//●⁰ ౪ ⁰●)//

[+69, -2] OMG ONGNIEEEEELLLLL!!!!! Btw, it’s good that OP noticed uri Nielie’s charm. Now she became peaches as well. Welcome to the fandom, OP!

[+635, -6] Latest update: Apparently Kang Daniel came to meet the writer about his cameo role. He said that he accepted the cameo offer because of Ong Seongwoo and he wanted a role that interacted a lot with Tae Woo, Ong Seongwoo’s character.

[+108, -11] Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo was together a lot lately, don’t you think so? They got especially close this whole week.

[+357, -4] OMG I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE CAMEO!!

 

 

**[KPop-News]**

Kang Daniel spotted alongside Ong Seongwoo again on The Summer’s Constellation drama set. He was meeting up with the writer of the series and requesting for a role that interacted a lot with Ong Seongwoo’s character on the drama, Kim Tae Woo. “I accepted the cameo offer because I want to act again with Seongwoo-Hyung,” Kang Daniel stated. 

 

The last time the two of them acted together was during WANNA ONE’s Beautiful MV (2017) 2 years ago. The two of them acted as a pair of brother, separated during midnight’s runaway and tried their best to seek each other. Regarding the request, the writer stated that it wasn’t a problem at all. Fans were excited for the cameo, some even speculated that Daniel’s role would be Tae Woo’s brother. 

 

What do you think? Enter our poll!

**[poll]**

 

* * *

 

“Good afternoon.”

When the door of the van opened, Jihyo didn’t expect to found out that it was Kang Daniel who opened the slide door and slightly bowed—greeted her as he climbed in. She was here to picked up Seongwoo, after all. Her own artist climbed after the younger male, sat beside the latter. From behind the wheel, she was really surprised. Her mouth formed an ‘O’ shape before she swallowed her curiousity. The two of them looked relaxed; minding their own business as Daniel proceed to call Youngsik about him going to the drama’s set along with Seongwoo and Seongwoo took his script from his bag, memorized his lines in silence.

 

However, there was something between them. Eventhough they didn’t interact with each other at the moment, there was something lingered in the atmosphere—warm and intimate, enveloped the two males.

 

Jihyo didn’t say anything, turned on the engine and drove in silence. Halfway, during a red light, Jihyo stole a glance from the rearview mirror. The two of them were adorably fallen asleep. Seongwoo’s script was dangerously hanged on the edge of the seat, almost fall down as the actor had loosened his grip. His head was placed on Daniel’s shoulder, the younger male’s head was resting atop Seongwoo’s. The two of them got that same dark shadow under their eyes, looked tired and need a good long time to rest—but the two of them looked really cozy and content at the moment.

 

The corner of Jihyo’s lips twitched, but she didn’t say anything. She turned down the radio’s volume and moved the gears as the light was turning green.

 

* * *

 

“Omo, it’s Kang Daniel…!”

 

It was the second time he accompanied Seongwoo to the drama’s location, yet the staffs still reacted just they did during his first visit. There were some female staffs that looked really excited, fangirling over the idol’s towering figure. Some of them clasped their mouth, their face flushed red. When Daniel smiled and nodded towards their directions, the girls shrieked—almost jumping up and down.

 

Even when he was just standing there doing nothing, Daniel looked like a painting. His gaze was especially gentle, eyes shone as he talked with Seongwoo. Seeing the two of them together side by side, was truly a blessing to the eyes. One was blonde with broad shoulders and imposing figure, yet his manner was warm and charming towards the one with raven hair and leaner built. Their looks were so different it was almost looked like the exact opposite—but there was the charm. They said opposite attracts; the two of them were like yin and yang, day and night, something that complimented each other, co-exist as one absolute harmony.

 

“They looked so perfect together…!” One of the staff commented. It wasn’t only the staffs, the assistant director was hyped as he saw the two youngster as well. Even before the cameo role being filmed, their drama had attracted so much interest. Their rating was unsurprisingly rose each episodes. Moreover, their drama’s title went viral on the search engine. The keyword ‘Kang Daniel The Summer’s Constellation’ was trending in several websites and entertainment apps as well.

 

The writer of the series was meeting the director today as well, so it was a perfect opportunity to discuss the cameo role. The writer wanted to create a character that got great influence towards the overall story for Daniel, it would be a shame to waste such a great powerhouse name to only appear briefly on their drama. But as Daniel could only appeared as cameo and not a side character, there were some restrictions as this character could only appeared once or twice.

 

“I want a character that interacted a lot with Tae Woo,” Daniel said, his tone was sincere. He was smiling brightly as he restated his request—the same request had been conveyed by Youngsik Hyung during the contract agreement’s discussion earlier after all. In a relaxed manner, the MMO idol circled his hand around Seongwoo’s waist and pulled the actor closer. The raven haired stumbled for a bit as he didn’t expecting the intimate gesture, ended up leaning on Daniel’s body. 

 

Seongwoo was startled with their position and hurriedly slapped Daniel’s hand. The younger male persisted and keep holding the older male’s waist. “I accepted the cameo offer because I want to act again with Seongwoo-Hyung,” Daniel added, then winced as Seongwoo pinched the back of his hand since Daniel stubbornly ignored his previous protest. “Aaah, Hyung—why did you pinch me, aaaw!”

 

The actor didn’t replied, merely pursed his lips as he fumed—a slight blush dusted his complexion with traces of pink. Their banter looked really cute and heart-warming. This duo was previously dubbed as the dumb and dumber duo. They often jokes and acted childish like this, but it was the first time the drama staffs saw this side of Seongwoo. 

 

The Ong Seongwoo they knew was a handsome actor whom serious with his work, his acting skill was superb. Of course he would joke around once in a while, but due his potrayal as Tae Woo and their drama’s serious tone, Seongwoo mostly appeared solemn and quiet as he would memorizing his lines whenever he got a free time on the set.

 

In front of the two of them, the writer’s eyes widened—filled with sparkles as she was struck with inspiration. Her whole body was tingling with the urge to write her ideas down, at the very moment. 

* * *

 

 

“Ah, he’s so good looking—“ One of the female staff was blushing as she stole glances towards Daniel. The MMO idol was sitting on a folded chair, placed on the side of the set. He was sitting leisurely, but hunched his back forward as he put his fingers on his lips; an amused smile never left his face, eyes glued on Seongwoo’s figure on the set.

 

He had requested the permission to watch the older male acted for today’s scene. The director and other staffs didn’t have any issues with his request, proceed to gave him a perfect spot to observe Seongwoo and the other cast members act on the set. One of the male staff gave him a bottle of water, Daniel accepted it politely and slightly bowed as he took the bottle. “Thank you…!” He thanked, and the male staff suddenly knew why the female staffs were fangirling over this idol before. 

 

On the set, the director was explaining the scene to the actress played Hae In’s mother. The veteran actress nodded as she listened to the brief. Seongwoo stood beside her, and for a split second he realized Daniel’s gaze. The actor immediately smiled, waved at the younger male. Daniel couldn’t help to chuckle and waved back. Seongwoo made a face towards him before he gestured a hush by placing his fingers on his lips, teasing the way Daniel put his fingers on his lips—though their gestures got different meanings. 

 

After the brief, the director sat behind the camera’s screen and the slate was soon clapped after he yelled his instruction, “Action!”

 

The set had been transformed into Hae In’s childhood home. She wasn’t living there anymore, but her mother and little brother still lived on the old house. Back then when Hae In’s family company went bankrupt, her father took it the hardest. Hae In father almost kill himself, but Tae Woo found him and convinced him not to. Yet he still went ill, and after suffered for a whole year he passed out on the street before died of a heart attack. Hae In’s mother suddenly became a widow and later turned ill as well due being overworked.

 

During those times, it was Tae Woo whom helped Hae In’s family. After he got his job, he often gave the money to Hae In’s mother as well. Herr family grew dependent for him, especially Hae In’s mother. Her mental state wasn’t the same after the death of her husband, and lately she realized that Tae Woo acted distant towards her daughter.

 

“Tae Woo-ah,” The actress sat on the floor, eyeing Tae Woo. Her expression was dark, made the viewer restless. “Do you have a fight with Hae In…?” She pestered. Tae Woo sat across her, replied with a soft no as he didn’t want to expose Hae In’s problem. Tae Woo wondered if what Hae In doing was considered an affair. Did she really two-timing him? But whatever it was, she didmake him upset. Tae Woo felt betrayed as his affection was never reached Hae In’s heart. 

 

One of the biggest reason why Hae In accepted him as her boyfriend was because her mother’s constant nagging. Their family owed Tae Woo too much, and they couldn’t afford to let Tae Woo cut ties with them. Hae In despised her mother for this reason, and their relationship was later got strained over the matter.

 

“Tae Woo-ah,” She called again. Truthfully, she knew about Hae In’s relationship with Seo Jun. One of her neighbour saw her daughter with the rich _chaebol_ in town, looking really cozy together. It was one of the moment Hae In’s emotion conflicted as she was falling in love all over again with Seo Jun. She ignored Tae Woo’s phonecall and went for a second round of beer with her colleagues, Seo Jun was one of the attendee of the company gathering.

 

Back then, Hae In’s mother brushed it off, saying that Hae In was just participating in a mere company gathering. But as she was her mother, she knew Hae In well. She also knew that Hae In was reluctant to accept Tae Woo. “Please forgive Hae In,” Her mother clutched on Tae Woo’s arm, “She was being really busy lately. Her company got a huge project, so she couldn’t meet with you as often as before.”

 

She didn’t know that Tae Woo actually had caught Hae In red-handedly. Tae Woo looked so fed up as he heard the excuses. After his last banter with his girlfriend, he really want to ended their relationship. He want to let Hae In go, so she could be free. Getting obsessed with revenge is one thing, but two-timing him was another thing. She had crossed his bottom line. Yet Hae In refused and left before he could say anything.

 

“I’m sorry but—“

 

“No!!” Hae In’s mother suddenly went hysterical, “You couldn’t do this to us, Tae Woo-ah! You and Hae In are meant to be. She was just being busy and got held up by her works, why did you acted like this towards her like this? You are acting too impulsively…!!” 

 

She deliberately pushed all the bad deeds on Tae Woo’s side. It’s been a while and Tae Woo didn’t give her any amount of money as usual. Of course, Hae In send her money as well, but Tae Woo basically the source of their financial aids. Tae Woo was conflicted as he was forced into these kind of sticky situation. He wanted to refute, but didn’t able to. Hae In’s mother wasn’t healthy, her mental state had been worsened as well. 

 

Just when she intended to keep pestering Tae Woo, the slide door opened and a young child barged in. He was Hae In’s little brother. Different from his mother and sister, he was grateful towards Tae Woo’s helps and actually ashamed for his family’s attitude. One was treating her lover half-heartedly while the other leeched her daughter’s boyfriend shamelessly. 

 

“Eomma, how could you act like this…!” Hae Jun, Hae In’s brother stared at his mother in utter disappointment. “What do you know?!” Hae In’s mother was angry, “Hae Jun, don’t meddle! Just leave us alone…! Eomma need to talk to your sister’s boyfriend…!”

 

Hae Jun sighed, “That’s why you shouldn’t act like this…! He was Noona’s boyfriend, not her husband! Why did you act so shamelessly, pushing all faults towards him and keep asking him for money? He didn’t owe us anything, he even help us so many times before. Why did you return his good deeds by behaving unreasonably like this, I really couldn’t understand you and Noona…!”

 

The boy ran to their side and pulled Tae Woo’s hand. “You didn’t need to listen to my mother, Hyung,” He said apologetically, “Just leave for now, I’ll talk some senses to Eomma.” He pushed Tae Woo to the entrance and closed the door rather forcefully.

 

“…cut!” The director shouted, “Okay!”

 

The actress smiled in relief. She nodded with a wide smile when Seongwoo gave her a praise, able to portrayed such unreasonable character like that and ended the scene in one take. Of course, Hae Jun’s actor was great as well. The kid was able to complete the scene without any hitch.

 

“Niel-Hyung…!” The kid approached Daniel. He was smiling, almost from ear to ear, “Woah, it’s been a while since the last time we met.”

 

Daniel blinked. He didn’t have any memory about the young actor, but he did recognize the familiar face. He had seen him on the previous WANNA ONE’s MV, the one portrayed Seongwoo as a kid. His face was rather different as the boy had grew older, but Daniel still recognized him. 

 

“Woojin-ah, it’s been a while…!” Daniel broke a smile and patted Moon Woojin’s head gently. He wanted to ruffled his hair, but he might ruined the hairstyle. He didn’t know if there would be another scene for Hae Jun later, so he didn’t want to take the risk. 

 

The boy smiled shyly, seemed happy by Daniel’s gesture. They haven’t met else than the audition and that one time when they met during a music awards by chance. _It was great as I got a chance to act with Ong Seongwoo Hyung,_ Woojin thought, _But it was such a shame we didn’t get many scenes together. And now Daniel-Hyung was here as well. Is it possible for us to act together?_

 

He wanted to chat more, but he got another scene with the actress played his mother—the director was calling him. Woojin waved a goodbye as he ran back to the other side of the room. 

 

“His acting was as great as ever,” Daniel complimented him. 

 

Witnessing the interaction, Seongwoo slowly pulled Daniel aside. He leaned in and whispered as he didn’t want the other to hear their conversation. “Niel-ah,” Seongwoo spoke to Daniel’s ear, his voice faint, “You remembered Moon Woojin…?”

 

“Well, I do remember him from the MV,” Daniel replied, “and WANNA ONE Go… season 2? I watched most of WANNA ONE and my latest clips.” After all, the kid’s name left him a rather deep impression. Their OngNiel fans dubbed them as ‘Woojin’s parents’—it was an internal joke between the shipper that their OTP seemed to ‘adopt’ so many Woojin: Lee Woojin, then Park Woojin, followed by Moon Woojin.

 

Seongwoo pouted. For a moment there, he thought that Daniel’s memories really came back. “I thought that you regained your memory back,” His tone was rather bitter. Daniel gave him an apologetic smile. “Not yet, Hyung. Sorry about that.”

 

“Stop with the Hyung honorifics,” Seongwoo frowned. He hated it when Daniel called him _‘hyung’_ like that—he was reminded of his previous bitter memory, when they fought and Daniel deliberately called him _‘hyung’_ to mocked him. That honorific was the proof that Daniel lost his memories and unable to recognized him. 

 

Daniel titled his head, “But there were many people here, so it would be impolite to just addressing you with your name.” He tried to act innocent, batted his eyelashes, selling his _aegyo_ to the older male.

 

Seongwoo sighed.

 

As the older male looked dejected, Daniel tried his best to act more _aegyo_. “Awww, don’t be mad,” Daniel pulled him closer, whispered right into Seongwoo’s ear, “…Seongwoo-ya.”

 

Daniel’s voice was low, a bit husky. It sounded really sexy, sending shivers to Seongwoo’s spine. The older male blushed furiously, covered his ears and pouted even more. “Aigooo, don’t be mad… Please, Seongwoo-ya. I’m sorry. I won’t tease you again,” Daniel pleaded as he nudged on Seongwoo’s side, “…please?”

 

“Dinner’s on you.” Seongwoo finally cave in to the latter’s puppy eyes.

 

“Okay,” Daniel laughed, “Dinner’s on me.”

 

* * *

 

It was hours later when Seongwoo finished his scenes.

The sky had turned into navy blue, almost black. The lights were on, filled the streets with thousands of neon signs—all lined up, looked almost like a box of jewels. Jihyo droved them to a restaurant with really cool looking exterior, located in Itaewon, not too far from their apartment’s location; Youngsik would pick them up later after the meal.

 

Daniel didn’t think much about the restaurant, but as he exited the van and saw the big square sign with ‘[Les Deux Plats](https://www.onlyitaewon.com/listings/les-deux-plats/)’ written on it, he recognized the place. He had read about the place on an article before. This place was supposed to be his secret date spot with Seongwoo; and despite the rather pricey menu, they had visited a few times and dined on every floor of Les Deux Plats. The article said that after it got exposed to the public, they never went there anymore—too many fans visited the restaurant, hoping for a chance to be able to meet them there.

 

“This place…” Daniel gazed towards the sign. He stared at the exterior of the building. It was indeed felt really familiar, though he didn’t see any flashbacks like he did before. Seongwoo smiled, gestured him to follow the older male inside. Right after the front door, the maitre’d welcomed them, “Your table had been set.” Jihyo, per Seongwoo’s instruction, had made a reservation for them. 

 

The 3rd floor was a bar and lounge, while the 1st and 2nd floor served as restaurant. Due the privacy issue, the restaurant gave them a table in the more secluded area on the 2nd floor. They got a potato cream soup as the appetizer, followed by the grilled chicken caesar salad. Their main dish would be the aglio olio and mushroom carbonara pasta, accompanied with slices of deconstructive pork chops. 

 

It was a wonder to Daniel. He really love the pasta. They felt really familiar, even the wine they drank gave him a really strong deja vu feelings. “It was your favourite,” Seongwoo told him, and Daniel paused for a second. “Ah,” He said, “No wonder I really like this. My preference is remained the same, no matter what.”

 

He stole glances to Seongwoo, “Not just the meal and the wine… I was falling in love with you over and over again, no matter what.”

 

Seongwoo blushed again, “Liar…!”

 

“I’m telling the truth,” Daniel chuckled, “Whatever it was, the result remained the same, Seongwoo-ya, I keep falling for you. I fell in love with you, on the first sight when you came to the hospital. I fell for you…” His tone was languid, unhurried, rather teasing, “…over, and over, and over again…”

 

He placed his hand atop Seongwoo’s hand on the table, and gave it a gentle squeeze. _His hand felt so warm_ , Seongwoo thought, smiled as he let Daniel holding his hand intimately like that. “Daniel,” He asked, his tone was a bit shaky, “Do you want to have your memories back?”

 

“Of course I do,” Daniel replied almost immediately. He tightened his holding on Seongwoo’s hand, made some circles using his thumb. “I want to remember everything,” He said solemnly, eyes never left Seongwoo’s onyx coloured orbs, “I want to remember about us. I want to get our past back, every details, every little things we did in the past.”

 

“Not all of our memories are rose-coloured though,” Seongwoo smiled, teasing him more, “Like I’ve told you before… we fought rather often. And I was being unreasonable most of those times.”

 

“It doesn’t matter,” Daniel’s gaze was sharp, yet there was something mellow on his stare, “That was you. That was our history. I wanted them all, the good and the bad. I hate being like this, with no memories of the things we did the past three years.”

 

Seongwoo squeezed his hand in return, eyes were downcast for a moment. Then he blinked and stared on Daniel’s handsome face. The younger male looked rather steadfast. “We…” Seongwoo tried to smile, assuring his lover, “…we will get it somehow. We will manage. It would be great if you regained your memory quickly, but no rush. It’s okay.”

 

Daniel still kept his silence. His break period was almost over. Soon, he wouldn’t be able to enjoy his time freely with Seongwoo like this. He remembered his schedule, the one listed before his incident. They were packed full to the brim. He barely got time to sleep, let alone to laze around spending his time with Seongwoo.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“What if I didn’t get my memory back…? Like… ever?”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More WANNA ONE members will show up on later chapters :))
> 
> Btw as usual, you could visit the food's pics and recipes on my twitter posts: https://twitter.com/mizuno_hikaru/status/1059276580445401088
> 
> And here's some shortcuts for the recipes if you're interested but too lazy to visit the twitter post:  
> \- [Creamy Potato Soup](https://www.cookingclassy.com/creamy-potato-soup/)  
> \- Grilled Chicken Caesar Salad  
> \- [Deconstructed Pork Chops (with pear)](https://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/deconstructed-pear-pork-chops/)
> 
> ===  
> Oh, last but not least, I'm participating in [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation) on twitter.  
> If you want to leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) please do check the event~! If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	19. I love you even with your imperfections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "And… how about you, Seongwoo-ya? When did you start to fall for me…?”
> 
> “Not at the first sight,” Seongwoo laughed, and Daniel pouted, “Hey…!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning, lovelies~!!  
> Here's this week's update, please enjoy and have a great Monday~! ^^b
> 
> P.S. Please check the end note for some announcement :)

* * *

 

_“What if I didn’t get my memory back…? Like… ever?”_

 

Daniel’s voice was rather gloomy. It was so different with his usual cheery and bright attitude. Seongwoo was taken aback by Daniel’s words, but he could sympathise with the latter’s doubt. “Daniel,” He called the latter’s name as he clasped their fingers together, “You are the one who said that you wanted your memories back. Don’t lose hope.”

 

Daniel gave him a weak smile. “I know.”

 

“You…” Seongwoo inhaled a deep breath, staring at the latter’s eyes as his thumb created circle patterns on Daniel’s hand, “You have me. I’m still here. We would still being us—I have all of our memories. I remembered them all. You could ask anything you wanted to know, and I’ll tell my memories to you. And—“

 

“And?”

 

“We could re-trace the things we’ve done in the past. Doing things like we used to do, visiting our important places,” Seongwoo looked solemn, “It could be key to triggered your memory. That’s what your doctor had said before, right?”

 

Daniel’s smile went wider, he looked more relaxed after hearing Seongwoo’s idea. “I’d like that,” He praised the suggestion, “But soon we won’t have the time to do things leisurely. Do you have any idea where we should start the plan…?”

 

Seongwoo thought about it for a second, “Let’s start by talking with our WANNA ONE members.”

 

* * *

They opened the chatroom—the name of the group chat was remained the same: ALL I WANNA DO IS WANNA ONE. The current avatar had been changed though, someone was replacing their “1” logo with their group photo from their last concert. There was a few updates on the group chat, but mainly of a couple of photos Jisung took with Minhyun on their last meeting, followed by the discussion when Daniel went missing.

 

**Eomma:** Met our emperor today!

**Eomma:** [photo] 

**Eomma:** [photo] 

**Eomma:** [photo] 

**Eomma:** I miss you guys, seriously

**Eomma:** We need to plan that reunion soon

 

**Eomma** changed **Minhyunie** nickname into **HwangEmperor**

 

**HwangEmperor:** Yeah, let’s pick a date and make sure it was free

**HwangEmperor:** It won’t be easy, but it would still easier than waiting for a free day for all eleven of us

 

**FightMe:** It was hard to wait for such a miracle

**FightMe:** Or we could wait until a music event

**FightMe:** But yeah not everyone would attend and no guarantee of free time so

**FightMe:** Minhyun Hyung’s suggestion is the best… i think?

**FightMe:** Wait lemme change my nickname

 

**FightMe** changed his nickname into **NamjaJihoon**

 

**GulliverMaknae: @HwangEmperor** Hyung, Seonho say hi

**GulliverMaknae:** He said that he voted for you guys

 

**HwangEmperor:** Say my thanks to him

**HwangEmperor:** [thank you emoticon]

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Okay :)

**GulliverMaknae:** [thumbs up emoticon]

 

**Sparrow:** Can we discuss that reunion again?

 

**ManduCheeks:** What date you guys preferred?

**ManduCheeks:** ….UM HELLOOOOO?

**ManduCheeks:** Guys?

**ManduCheeks:** Ha-ha verry funny

**ManduCheeks:** We’re not playing that ‘let’s ignore Jaeni’ again

**ManduCheeks:** [puffed cheeks emoticon]

 

**CloudFairy:** [evilaugh emoticon]

**CloudFairy:** I’ll ask my manager about the possible date

**CloudFairy:** Hotshot will have another comeback soon

 

**DarkBae:** Good luck, Hyung!

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** We’ll cheering for you guys~!! 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** GO HOTSHOT!

**CutiePieDaehwi:** [yay.gif]

 

**CloudFairy:** Okay I won’t ask why Jinyoungie and Daehwi reply on the same time at this hours

**CloudFairy:** I totally didn’t see you guys just now at Gangnam

 

**DarkBae:** …

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** … [2]

 

**HwangEmperor:** …[3]

 

**ManduCheeks:** …[4]

 

**NamjaJihoon:** …[5]

 

**GulliverMaknae:** oh lemme join dis

**GulliverMaknae:** …[6]

 

**CloudFairy:** /roll eyes/

 

**—**

  
****

**Eomma:** GUYS

**Eomma:** HAD ANYONE SEE DANIEL

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Eh?

**CutiePieDaehwi:** What happened

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Did something happened

 

**NamjaJihoon:** What do you mean 

**NamjaJihoon:** Wait did Niel Hyung go missing or sth

 

**Eomma:** Seongwoo contacted me

**Eomma:** They fought

**Eomma:** BIG

**Eomma:** Seriously ah

**Eomma:** These two kids seriously

**Eomma:** Ah, headache

 

**HwangEmperor:** Wait

**HwangEmperor:** Daniel’s missing?

 

**Eomma:** We’re trying to find him at the moment

**Eomma:** If he contacted one of you guys

**Eomma:** or anyone see any news abput him

**Eomma:** Please do tell

**Eomma:** Dang it I’m worried sick

 

**HwangEmperor:** I’ll look around

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Me too

 

**Sparrow:** I’ll try to contact him

 

**GulliverMaknae:** I texted him

**GulliverMaknae:** But no response

 

**ManduCheeks:** His phone went to voicemail—

 

**NamjaJihoon:** Anyone checked twitter or IG yet?

 

**CloudFairy:** I’m on it

 

**BlackCat:** Guys

**BlackCat:** I messed everything up

 

**CloudFairy:** WAIT

**CloudFairy:** Seongwoo, are you okay

**CloudFairy:** Seongwoo

 

**Sparrow:** Hyung

**Sparrow:** Seongwoo Hyung

 

**HwangEmperor:** Seongwoo?

**HwangEmperor:** Please reply 

 

**GulliverMaknae:** OMG

**GulliverMaknae:** Seongwoo Hyung

**GulliverMaknae:** Pls reply

 

**NamjaJihoon:** WAIT

**NamjaJihoon:** What do you mean with messed up

**NamjaJihoon:** Hyung

**NamjaJihoon:** Are you okay

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Can anyone checked on Seongwoo-Hyung now

**CutiePieDaehwi:** I’m worried

 

**CloudFairy:** I’m free

 

**HwangEmperor:** I’m going too

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Me and Woojin still got this rehearsal

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Please keep update

 

 

“Whoa…!”

Seongwoo was so embarassed, he tried to took Daniel’s phone away from him. “Don’t read the mess,” His face was flushed red, “I went full-blown panic that night.” 

 

Daniel didn’t reply.

Eventhough Seongwoo looked alright at the moment, he remembered the sobs when he phoned the older male. Daniel remembered how broken Seongwoo’s voice—so vulnerable and sorrowful the older male was. “I’m so sorry,” He apologized softly, “For saying mean things to you before.”

 

Seongwoo shook his head, “No, it was my fault for lying like that and hiding the truth from you.”

Since their atmosphere went awkward, Seongwoo continued, “Just ask them for some suggestion.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Daniel let Seongwoo scrolled down the chat all the way to the latest message, the one when Sungwoon told everybody that Seongwoo had been supposedly fine and he went back home along with Minhyun, followed by Jisung’s update since Daniel had contacted him. There wasn’t any new disscusion after the last conversation.

 

 

**Nielie:** Hey guys

 

**CloudFairy:** Hey guys my foot

**CloudFairy:** You made us worry

**CloudFairy:** Rascal

 

**Nielie:** Sorry Hyung

**Nielie:** [bow emoticon]

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Oh you’re online

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Finally

 

**Sparrow:** WHATSSUP HYUNG

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Hyung, you didn’t reply to our messages before :(

**GulliverMaknae:** I’m sad

 

**Nielie:** [sorry emoticon]

**Nielie:** [bow emoticon]

 

**ManduCheeks:** Repeat that emoji 100x times more ah

**ManduCheeks:** You made us worried

 

**Nielie:** [sorry emoticon]

**Nielie:** [sorry emoticon]

**Nielie:** [sorry emoticon]

**Nielie:** [sorry emoticon]

 

**NamjaJihoon:** Stop ah

**NamjaJihoon:** That’s spamming the notifications

 

**ManduCheeks:** Abort the last mission, Niel

**ManduCheeks:** JK about the 100x emojis

 

**Nielie:** So sorry guys

**Nielie:** I didn’t mean to make you guys worry

**Nielie:** But my phone was out of battery

 

**DarkBae:** Next time please do reply to us Hyung

**DarkBae:** Daehwi was so worried of you guys

 

**CloudFairy:** Okay totally won’t ask why’d you know

**CloudFairy:** But seriously

**CloudFairy:** I wonder how Jisung could bear being your mediator

**CloudFairy:** All these time

**CloudFairy:** For so looonngggg

**CloudFairy:** [salute emoticon]

 

**Eomma:** Welcome to the club

 

**CloudFairy:** You’re so patient Hyung

**CloudFairy:** But maybe that’s why you’re the mother

 

**NamjaJihoon:** BTW

**NamjaJihoon:** Where’s the other

 

**CloudFairy:** Minhyun still performing on stage

**CloudFairy:** Hotshot will perform after 2 more groups btw

**CloudFairy:** So if I suddenly MIA

**CloudFairy:** I’ve told you guys

 

**Eomma:** BTW Niel

**Eomma:** Don’t you go for dinner with Seongwoo?

 

**Nielie:** Yeah

**Nielie:** He’s with me

**Nielie:** [photo]

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Awww aren’t you two the cutest

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Hi **@BlackCat** Hyung!

 

**GulliverMaknae:** You’re not join the chatting, Hyung? **@BlackCat**

**GulliverMaknae:** [??? emoticon]

 

**Nielie:** His phone battery just died

**Nielie:** And we didn’t have any port here on the table

**Nielie:** So we’re using my phone

 

**ManduCheeks:** Ah that’s why

**ManduCheeks:** Anyway

**ManduCheeks:** You guys wanna tell us sth?

**ManduCheeks:** What is it

 

**Nielie:** Well

**Nielie:** Seongwoo and I was talking about

**Nielie:** Triggering my memory

**Nielie:** He suggested to repeated the things we’ve done in the past

**Nielie:** Have any input about that?

 

**HwangEmperor:** Oh, that’s quite a good idea

 

**ManduCheeks:** You’ve finished the performance **@HwangEmperor**?

 

**HwangEmperor:** Yeah

**HwangEmperor:** It was almost Sungwoon Hyung turn now

**HwangEmperor:** Hotshot just went to the stage’s side

 

**Eomma:** Okay, back to the memory trigger discussion 

 

**HwangEmperor:** Have you guys made a list?

 

**NamjaJihoon:** List?

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Ah I got it

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Like, you two need to list anything that you considered important

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Then just do that you’ve listed there

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Right?

 

**HwangEmperor:** You’re smart **@CutiePieDaehwi**

**HwangEmperor:** Yeah, just follow the list

**HwangEmperor:** And you didn’t need to do it in order

**HwangEmperor:** Just do it according to your schedule/free time

 

**ManduCheeks:** Paju might be a great start

 

**NamjaJihoon:** Ah yeah

**NamjaJihoon:** P101 was the starting point after all

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Then our dorm?

 

**DarkBae:** The old one might be tricky

**DarkBae:** We didn’t have permission to visit it anymore

 

**Nielie:** We’ll manage

**Nielie:** Somehow

 

**Eomma:** Busan might be a great option too

 

**Sparrow:** Yeah, you guys visited Busan often

**Sparrow:** You guys went home to visit Daniel’s home everytime

 

**Eomma:** Should we made a list for the places?

**Eomma:** Then we could compile them

 

**GulliverMaknae:** That’s a great idea

 

**CloudFairy:** I finished the shoot~

**CloudFairy:** What did I just miss?

 

 

It was fun to chat with the other members. They were so supportive. Eventhough Daniel didn’t really remember them all, he had seen the videos if them together—practice, playing together, doing missions together, etc. Those videos helped him as he got a sense of belonging for the group—and they didn’t feel like a stranger. 

 

“I want to remember them all,” He said to himself, and Seongwoo heard it. The raven haired patted his shoulder, “We’ll work on it.” The older male was giving him a reassuring smile, and Daniel smiled back. He was resisting this urge to lean in and kiss his lover, but they were in public place. It was already to risky, with they dined and holding hands just like they did before, but their table was rather secluded. Kissing on the other hand, was an exception.

 

“Let’s finished our food and went home to your place,” Daniel whispered. Seongwoo tilted his head, not really grasped the younger’s train of thoughts. “Sure,” He answered, “But why so rushed—?”

 

“I want to kiss you senseless and I couldn’t do it in public like this.” Daniel was replying with too much honesty and Seongwoo’s face was reddened in the next second. But there was that sly, understanding smile appeared on his face. “Okay?” Daniel asked him with a smirk, and Seongwoo chuckled as he answered, “Okay.”

 

* * *

 

Youngsik drove them to Seongwoo’s apartment. Daniel got his clothes and amenities there, so he didn’t need to pack anything. The day after would be Daniel’s last break period though, so Youngsik would pick him up during the afternoon. His manager handed Daniel the brief for the upcoming schedule: for starter he would appear in a radio interview. Youngsik had listen the possible questions, so he would better learn and prepared his answers. Then he got several magazine photoshoot. Hite and Think Nature photoshoots will followed after, and he also got a new brand advertisement.

 

“We were limiting any show with live shootings for the moment,” Youngsik told him, “As well as some variety shows that requires many physical effort. You got a schedule as a guest panelist on this new show though. Oh, and since you’ll be appearing as cameo on Seongwoo’s drama, we had prepared some time for you to learn the acting. The acting teacher hadn’t been assigned, since we haven’t receive the script yet.”

 

“I could teach him,” Seongwoo immediately said, “So there was no need for any teacher. And people won’t ask why’d Daniel spent some time together with me.”

 

Youngsik seemed like he wanted to say something, but he swallowed it down. “Okay,” He said then, “I’ll inform the agency about it.”

 

“Thanks, Youngsik Hyung…!”

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo’s apartment still looked the same.

It was even cleaner and neater in some places, and Seongwoo laughed. “Minhyun tidied them when he visited last time with Sungwoon Hyung.” Daniel wanted to smile as he had watched Minhyun cleaned his surroundings when he got bored on most WANNA ONE Go videos. He even found some articles about fans that nicknamed the Nu’est member with ‘Minhyunderella’ due his cleaning habit.

 

Seongwoo put his bag and plopped himself to the couch. Daniel followed his action and sat next to Seongwoo. There was this smile on his face, his eyes sparkled when he stared at the raven haired’s face. “Stop looking at me like that,” Seongwoo blushed, but Daniel’s smile just got wider, “But I’m happy and I felt so blessed at the moment.”

 

“Why?”

 

Daniel laughed and leaned in, closing the gaps between them. His fingers traced on Seongwoo’s cheeks and jawline, slowly teasing his nape, “Because I have you and you are too beautiful. I couldn’t believe that you’re mine. You are perfect—“

 

“I’m not perfect,” Seongwoo hurriedly denied it, “And you knew it first hand, Niel.”

 

“I love you even with your imperfections,” Daniel’s gaze was so tender, “So you’re perfect for me, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

Seongwoo’s cheeks turned redder. “Thank you,” He whispered, “For loving me.” Daniel smiled again as he heard those words; his fingers touched Seongwoo’s jaw, his thumbs caressed Seongwoo’s lower lip. Seongwoo closed his eyes and let Daniel pulled him closer; the younger male’s lips met with his. It tasted bittersweet, just like the wine they had earlier.

 

They had kissed before, but this kiss felt so different—so tender and heartfelt. Seongwoo opened his mouth and titled his head to give Daniel a better angle to deepened the kiss. Unhurriedly, they kneaded each other lips—Daniel nibled on Seongwoo’s lower lip and gave it a teasing bite. Seongwoo smiled and circled his arms around Daniel’s shoulder, then gave him continuous light pecks.

 

“Hey,” Seongwoo whispered, “When did you start to fall for me again…?”

 

“At the first sight,” Daniel chuckled bashfuly, “I’ve told you earlier, haven’t I? That’s why I said that I fell for you over and over again. You entered the room and I saw you… and I fell in love. That’s simple.”

 

Seongwoo laughed and kissed him again. Daniel replied the kiss, devoured the latter with a slow and torturous movements that sending jolts of shivers to Seongwoo’s spine. The raven haired felt breathless, his toes curling as he felt Daniel pushed him down to a half-laying position; the soft pillows supported his waist.

 

“I’m thankful that you still fell in love with me,” Seongwoo said as he reached up, caressed Daniel’s cheek and traced the small mole beneath his eyes, “I love you, Niel-ah.”

 

Something exploded inside Daniel’s chest—felt warm and tingling, filled his emotion with a triumph and euphoric feelings. “I wonder if I fell for you at the first sight too during our first meeting,” He muttered, “Have I told you about it before…?”

 

“…no, you don’t.”

 

“Ah,” Daniel leaned in and kissed the moles on Seongwoo’s cheek, “I need to regain my memories to find out then. And… how about you, Seongwoo-ya? When did you start to fall for me…?”

 

“Not at the first sight,” Seongwoo laughed, and Daniel pouted, “Hey…!”

 

“Well,” Seongwoo assured him with another kiss, “I was so nervous back then. I was alone during Produce 101, you remember? No one else from Fantagio. My sunbae did great and there was two of them entered the top 11. I got this huge burden of expectation on my shoulder, so I didn’t really pay any attention at that moment. I only focused not to messed up.”

 

He then combed Daniel’s hair using his fingers, “I did remember your hair though. It was pink, so soft… looked like a cotton candy. I thought ‘oh that boy has a really great smile’ but I didn’t want think about anything else at that moment. You looked so happy with the whole MMO gangs, chatting happily—I remembered I envied you for it. Then, you came to A class. And you smiled again to me.”

 

“So you fell for me at that moment?” Daniel asked, with a really teasing tone. Seongwoo laughed harder and pinched Daniel’s cheeks, “I don’t know, actually. I’m not really sure. At that moment, I felt grateful for your kindness. I love being with you; it felt so easy, felt so right. You laugh at my silliest jokes. We did Sorry Sorry together and I loved every single minute of it—but it was during the judgement of Get Ugly when you were so nervous about the voting result and asked me to hold your hand…”

 

“And…?”

 

“And that was the moment when I realized ‘Ah—I love him’” Seongwoo confessed, “All of the sudden, I found out that I love you. I didn’t remember when my feelings for you turned into the state of ‘love’, beyond a friendship. I remember how devastated you were, since you got so little votings back then. I remember my heart ached, I feared that you would sent home on the next elimination. 

 

“On the same time, I panicked. ‘No’ I told myself—‘You are here to win the competition, not to fall in love with someone, Ong Seongwoo…!’ Back then, I scolded myself. I thought ‘Ah, this love of mine will ended fruitless’ since I didn’t consider that you’ll fall for me as well. I was in such anguish since I feared you’ll know about my feelings and weirded out by it. I feared that our relationship would go sour. Man, I was such a hot mess back then.”

 

“You… suffered anxiety and depression back then too, Seongwoo-ya…?” Daniel hesitantly asked. His eyes looked dim as he frowned about the matter. Seongwoo deciced to be honest, “I do. I lacked confidence of myself. While people said that they love me, I often wondered ‘Why do you guys love me? Even I don’t love myself—I don’t able to do so, I don’t know which part of me that likeable…’ But I didn’t want to show it. I joked around, being a jester, so people will laugh at me and by then, I would find a reason; that ‘Oh they love me because I’m funny’ so I keep doing all those stuffs…”

 

His voice went faint, then after another deep breath, “But then you’re there, Daniel. You always stay by my side. While you always laugh for my jokes, it was one time when you suddenly asked if I was okay and I don’t have to say that I’m okay when I’m not. We… argued about it. Well, I didn’t know if it was counted as an argue. Then, you got in trouble. You manipulated the votes by signaling ‘Never’ using cats emojis in your Instagram account. I remembered that I barged into your room and yelled at you about it. I was asking you why’d you do that.”

 

“…and what’s my answer…?”

 

Seongwoo closed his eyes, remembered the scene so clearly, as if it was happened yesterday. “You said…” Seongwoo’s tone trembled, “That you want to be in the same group with me, that’s all. You wanted to stay by my side. You said that you wanted to make sure I’m okay. Whoa, I remembered how strong-headed I was before. I said, I didn’t need you to do all of that. I told you that I’m fine and I didn’t need your help—that you are a fools do do that cat code. We didn’t talk after that.”

 

“Then, what happened?”

 

“You got hurt,” Seongwoo pursed his lips, “You sprained your wrist thanks to that stupid punching game machine. My heart sank and I rushed to your room when I heard about it. You got a cast and I cried when I saw it. The first thing you said to me was ‘So you’re not angry with me anymore, Hyung?’ and I cried even harder.”

 

“So what happened next—?” Daniel asked, curious about his past with Seongwoo. The raven haired male smiled; those dark eyes gleamed, looked like a polished obsidian stone. “Give me another kiss and I’ll tell you more. Okay?”

 

Daniel laughed, obliged to the request, “Okay.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More lovey dovey stuffs next update~~! :D
> 
> \---  
> Pssst, I'm participating in these twitter events:
> 
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> It's an OngNiel's fic fest. They would start posting the fics anonymously starting from 19th of Nov (WANNA ONE Comeback date, fellas?) so please check them out~! Can you guess which one is my oneshot? LOLZ~ 
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	20. It’s us against the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: NSFW Smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning, my lovelies~~!  
> Another Monday morning and that means a new update like usual~
> 
> Proceed this chapter with caution, the chapter summary had said it all LOLLZZ

* * *

 

Seongwoo’s lips tastes like honey.

It felt sweet, addicting. They were soft, kinda swollen from their previous make out session. Daniel gave the latter trails of kisses; he pecked on the older male’s forehead, down to his eyelids, his cheeks, the tip of his nose, his jawlines—those peppering kiss was brief, like a breeze of wind, yet filled with dominance. 

 

The raven haired smiled as he mischievously circled his arms around Daniel’s neck and pulled him down abruptly. With a laugh, he kissed back Daniel’s face—copied Daniel’s previous kisses, Seongwoo kissed the younger male’s forehead, his eyelids, the mole beneath his eyes, down to his cheeks and jawlines. He nibbled on Daniel’s chin, teasingly gave it small bites—his fingers were combing the latter’s fading blonde locks. 

 

“Niel—“ Seongwoo called his name, guided Daniel’s face down and opened his lips voluntarily; their lips met, slowly kneaded against each other. Daniel gave his lower lip a teasing nip, and Seongwoo let out a soft moan. Daniel was holding his waist tight, and though the younger male tried to shifted his weight so he won’t crushed Seongwoo with his whole weight, the blonde’s bigger body felt solid against Seongwoo. 

 

It was a rather familiar feeling to have Daniel half-lied atop of him. Seongwoo gasped as he felt Daniel’s lips on his neck. He responded by tilting his head, giving Daniel a better access to his neck lines. Those kisses felt hot against his skin, and soon Seongwoo’s breath went ragged. Slowly, he opened his legs and circled them on Daniel’s hips—another moan escaped as Daniel rolled his hips and grazed his hardened member against Seongwoo’s.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

Those long fingers steadily unbuttoned the buttons on Seongwoo’s shirt, revealing the smooth alabaster skin beneath. There were crimson marks scattered everywhere on the actor’s torso, those lovebites were the remnants of their previous lovemaking. After all they did it just a few days ago, so the marks were still remained.

 

With his white alabaster skin flushed in pink, messy hair and glassy eyes, Seongwoo’s look gave out a really sinful alluring vibe. Daniel remembered the quotes about Helen of Troy: the face that launched a thousand ships. His lover was so ethereally beautiful, and Daniel’s heart was filled with love and adoring feelings. 

 

“I love you,” He said. If he could, he would say it over and over: day and nights, as it was his truest feelings deep within. Seongwoo smiled, his eyes sparkled as those onyx-like orbs disappeared into two crescent lines. “I love you too,” He pulled Daniel again and gave him big, peppering pecks.

 

Daniel stole another kiss, deep and lingering. Seongwoo felt warm beneath him. With a gentle tug, Daniel secured the older male in his arms, supporting the raven haired in bridal style as he carried the latter onto the bedroom. 

 

The last time they did it, they did it on the carpet. Daniel felt so conflicted and pained about Seongwoo’s mysterious lover—and that unknown figure turned out to be Daniel himself. It felt somewhat like a funny irony, but he enjoyed it anyway. _Love was like a spring of water_ , he thought. Endless, shapeless, adapting, unyielding. At the moment though, his heart was filled to the brim, ready to burst. 

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

He took off the raven haired’s clothes away—those white shirt was ended crumpled away by the bed. Using his palm, Daniel traced the marks—his fingers grazed Seongwoo’s collarbone, down to his chest, his stomach… as he went south, Seongwoo clutched onto Daniel’s shoulder, gasped as Daniel’s hand palmed his bulge and kneaded it teasingly. 

 

“Ni…el…ah—“

 

Daniel’s palm roamed his body; every curves, every nooks and cranny. It almost felt like he was a master sculptor tried to replicating a masterpiece by remembering every bits of the model’s shape. Daniel gave Seongwoo’s shoulder a kiss. This time, he wanted to take his time. He wanted to savour every minute, every second of it. He wanted to give Seongwoo the utmost pleasure the latter could possibly feel.

 

The twin nubs on the actor’s chest hardened as Daniel teased them repeatedly, twisted and pinched them—gasps and moans emitted from Seongwoo’s lips. He felt like crazy. His body was burning with passion and desire. Those nubs turned swollen and puffy as they went erect—Daniel lapped his mouth onto one of them and sucked it hard, teasingly grazed the sensitive point using his front teeth. 

 

Seongwoo’s body reacted in such a honest manner, trashed as his toes curling, the long growling noises seeped through his throat. His words turned into such a jumbled, incoherent mess as Daniel rolled his hips and rubbed his member against Seongwoo’s—the fabric between them felt like an annoying barrier. He tugged the fabric down, leaving the two of them barenaked. 

 

The older male smiled mischievously, drapped his legs onto Daniel’s hips as he took small bites on the younger’s earlobes before he whispered “Fill me up…” in a low, husky voice. There was a layer of lust ignited by the persuasion on Daniel’s eyes. He scrambled around on Seongwoo’s bedside drawer, took the lube out and quickly poured the content onto his palm.

 

Seongwoo bit his lips as Daniel warmed the gel and lavishly covered his rings of entrance, the latter’s middle finger poked the opening several times, circled the muscles a few times, then slowly entered the tight channel. “…ngh—“ It took a while for his muscles to loosen up, and Daniel added a second finger. He did a couple of scissoring movement, moved his fingers in plowing movement into Seongwoo’s rigid channel.

 

Seongwoo’s erected member was leaking pre-cum; the clear liquid drenched the head, trickled down onto his stomach as his body rocked back and forth due Daniel’s fingering. Seongwoo’s inner walls were contracting, spasmed as three of Daniel’s finger entered deep—he were aiming on Seongwoo’s sweet spot the whole time.

 

“Niel-ah…!” With a loud cry, Seongwoo’s stomach tightened as he felt the familiar feeling washed over him and drowned him down. His body arched into a bow, and he shoot his release into three big spurts in a toe-curling orgasm. He heaved—the first two bursted into two long trails left a scattered white mess on his torso, the third one was leaking messily, pooled into his crotch. His whole body shook from the powerful orgasm, his legs were still shaking when Seongwoo felt Daniel rubbed himself into his sacred opening.

 

Daniel’s length was hard and pulsating, the veins grazed Seongwoo’s sensitive opening—his body recognized the feeling and his entrance twitched wildly. Seongwoo moaned as Daniel kissed him senseless, the mushroom head poked and nudged Seongwoo’s rings of muscles. Daniel rolled his hips, do a slow thrusting movements as he smeared his own leaking pre-cum onto Seongwoo’s rigid opening.

 

Seongwoo gasped and called his name—moved his hips in synch with Daniel’s movements. “Stop… teasing—“ He moans, “Please… fill me… Nghhh—!” The head went in, steadily followed by the bulging part, Seongwoo’s stomach started to felt full as the blonde did several shallow thrust, teasingly pulled himself up to the tip before Daniel finally plowed in with a single swift thrust, 

 

“Aaaakh—! Ngghh, Ni…el—“

 

His thrusts were wild and powerful. Seongwoo’s legs, which nestled on the side of Danile’s hips, swinged back and forth following the rocked motions. Seongwoo’s chest felt tight, the pleasure was so intense he kept saying some slurred, incoherent words. In the end, he repeated the younger’s name over and over again.

 

“Niel-ah… Niel— Ughhh—“

 

Daniel raisee Seongwoo’s legs and put them on his broad shoulder, changed his angle and thrusted deeper into his lover’s channel. Seongwoo let long, hoarse moans. His body was so sensitive from his previous came, and yet Daniel built the new waves of pleasure in such grand scale he was hard again in no time.

 

When Daniel tugged his nipples and gave another deep thrust, Seongwoo came for the second time. He could only sees white as he trembled and bursted another release. Daniel nipped his lower lips and kissed him again, a low moan escaped Seongwoo’s throat. His inner walls spasmed violently, milking Daniel’s rod. The younger male obliged and after a series of powerful thrust, he buried himself deep and released his seeds inside Seongwoo.

 

He waited for a while, keeping their position still. “Seongwoo-ya…” He called the latter’s name and kissed his collarbone. He buried his face on the crook of Seongwoo’s neck, inhaled the other’s scent—the musky scent was stronger due the sex. “Niel… Nnnghh…!” Seongwoo gasped as Daniel keep doing series of shallow thrusts, scrapped Seongwoo’s inner walls using his member. The Fantagio actor could felt how it went bigger and harder again inside of him, eager for a second round.

 

Still connected to each other, Daniel guided Seongwoo into all fours on the sheet, roamed his palm from the latter’s shoulder and swept accros through his sides before stopped at the latter’s hips. Daniel gave a gentle nudge and Seongwoo raised his hips, giving Daniel a better angle.

 

Seongwoo’s back was so beautiful, the line of his curved body looked tempting. His white skin was tinted in the blush of pink, concentrated on his neck, shoulder and chest. Daniel kissed those snowy white skin, whispering the other’s name right on Seongwoo’s ear—his husky voice was low and dangerously seductive.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

“Ah… Niel… ah—“

 

Daniel rolled his hips, pulled out for a bit, then slammed himself in again. Seongwoo loudly moaned, losing strength on his body. Due their new position, Daniel entered his channel even deeper than their previous missionary. The tingling sensation made Seongwoo drowned in overwhelming sensations, the intense pleasure drowned him in every movement. 

 

The mixture of lube and the previous release produced wet sloppy noises everytime Daniel ground their bodies together. It sounded so sinful, somewhat embarrassing. Seongwoo blushed, the crimson dusted his cheeks and the tip of his ears—his cheeks felt burning hot. 

 

As Seongwoo’s body felt boneless, he almost collapsed onto the sheet if he didn’t got supported by Daniel. The younger held his waist, his upper torso was half-slumped on the bed; his arms were barely able to support his weight. Daniel thrusted into him in irregular, frantic pace. In every thrust, Seongwoo moaned endlessly—he couldn’t held back his voice.

 

The room soon filled with moans and grunts, slapping noises from the point their bodies joined into one, followed with noisy squelch noises. Daniel kissed Seongwoo’s nape, bit on the tip of his earlobe, teasingly bit on the older’s shoulders and the crook of his neck. He bent his body, half leaned on Seongwoo’s body—though it was him who supported both of their weights on the matress.

 

Those fingers found Seongwoo’s chest once again; Daniel pressed the hardened nubs, twisted them and flicked one of the twin nubs before he reached down to Seongwoo’s leaking member. “Nghh no…!” It was overwhelming to be stimulated both on his front and back, and with a loud scream Seongwoo came for the third time. He saw another white, his whole body shook once more as he buried his face onto the pillow he used for support earlier. 

 

His inner walls spasmed like crazy, and this time after a low grunt, Daniel followed suit. He gave his final thrust, released his seeds inside his lover’s body. The post-coitus bliss didn’t subsided for quite a while, both of them gasped breathless from their lovemaking.

Finally, their bodies collapsed onto the mattress. Daniel still kissing Seongwoo’s hair and nape, huskily called the latter’s name. Seongwoo turned his head, those dark orbs seemed like a bottomless night—sparkled and gleamed gold under the golden hue of the lights. Their lips met, slow and gentle, lax yet possessive.

 

“I love you, Niel-ah,” Seongwoo whispered, faint as the whole activities took a heavy toll on his stamina. He felt satisfied and sleepy at the same time. Daniel gave him another peck, “Me too. I love you, Seongwoo-ya…”

 

After a while, Daniel moved his hips and did some shallow thrusts before he pulled his now softened member out. It emitted another loud wet noises as it plopped out, his semen trickled out from Seongwoo’s entrance, slowly oozed to his thigh. 

 

When Daniel carried him to the bathup, Seongwoo closed his eyes the whole time. He felt so sleepy, have no energy to even lift a finger. He let Daniel put him in the warm water after scrapped his release from inside and washed them several times—he leaned onto the edge of the bathup and let Daniel applied the shower gel onto his body. Later, Daniel re-positioned him against his chest as he washed Seongwoo’s hair, lathered the raven locks with the 2 in 1 shampoo. Daniel took his bath along with Seongwoo, then after a while the two of them were squeaky clean.

 

He was carried back to the bedroom, dazed and half-asleep when Daniel done drying his body. With a great determination, Seongwoo opened his eyes—Daniel was tucked him in, the blanket felt warm against their naked bodies. Daniel didn’t bothered to put any clothes on them at the moment, he was tired as well. Seongwoo scooted closer into Daniel’s embrace, put his ear close to the latter’s chest; the sound of Daniel’s heartbeats calmed him, lulled him into sleep.

 

Daniel kissed another chaste kiss on his lover’s forehead. “Sleep tight, sweet dream…” He whispered, and Seongwoo didn’t bothered to reply—he only responded with a soft hum.

 

_You too. Good night, Daniel._

 

* * *

 

The morning came with chirps of birds and golden sunshine seeped through the curtain. It was the last day on Daniel’s break time and soon in the afternoon Youngsik Hyung would picked Daniel back to the MMO dorm. 

 

Seongwoo opened his eyes, his eyelids felt heavy. There was a dull ache on his waist, from their rigorous activity the previous night, but else than that his whole body felt lax and comfortable. Daniel was just awoken as well, greeted him with his signature low voice. “Morning, Seongwoo-ya…”

 

“Morning, Niel…”

 

They were barely moved. The position felt too comfortable. Daniel rolled over and leaned on his side, facing Seongwoo. “What do you want to do this morning?” Truthfully, Seongwoo wanted to laze around and spend the morning on the bed like this—but doing so would wasted their precious time together. It would be hard for Daniel to get another breaktime soon, as Seongwoo saw his schedule was so packed with almost no time to rest.

 

“What do you want to do…?” He asked back. Daniel was silence for a moment, “I just want to cuddle with you the whole time.”

 

“Sounds great,” Seongwoo laughed, “But let’s have a breakfast first. I’m famished.”

 

As it was on cue, a rumble of hunger roared from Daniel’s stomach as well. He laughed, his nose scrunched up since he laughed so heartily. “Okay,” He nodded, “What do you want to eat?”

 

Seongwoo pursed his lips, “Let’s just see the _ban-chans_ Eomma gave us and cook another simple dish.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“Okay,” Seongwoo raised his leg and gave Daniel a nudge, “But you need to carry me again. I could barely feel my waist, you savage beast with no mercy…”

 

Daniel laughed, “Your reaction and response yesterday never show any of objections, Seongwoo-ya—“ The raven haired pretended to pout, and he looked so adorable while doing so. Daniel’s heart swelled again with love and adoration. He put his arms beneath Seongwoo’s knee and shoulders, hoisted him up with another princess carry.

 

He put Seongwoo on the sofa, the exact same spot just like the earlier day. Seongwoo pulled him by the edge of his hem, and nuzzled himself to Daniel. The younger male combed those soft raven locks, Seongwoo was rubbing his cheeks onto Daniel’s other palm. These was one of the moment the older male really reminded him to a big, black cat. 

 

“We will…” Seongwoo tried to phrase his words better, “…be together no matter what, right…?”

 

“Yeah,” Daniel leaned down, kneeled in front of Seongwoo and gave him the first kiss of the day, “It’s us against the world and I won’t regret it no matter what. We will be together and face whatever the world put in front of us together. So just believe in me and never doubt me again, okay?”

 

Seongwoo’s lips widened into a smile. He nodded,  “Okay.” 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, and the usual reminders about the events I participated:
> 
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> It's an OngNiel's fic fest. They would start posting the fics anonymously starting from 19th of Nov (WANNA ONE Comeback date, fellas?) so please check them out~! The postings will be publicized around 9PM KST everyday--Can you guess which one is my oneshot? LOLZ~ 
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	21. I don’t want you to leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His backpack was ready, Daniel took it from the floor and put it on his left shoulder before he turned back to Seongwoo.  
> “See you later,” He said, but he still didn’t move even a step away from his standing position. 
> 
> Seongwoo stepped forward instead, surrendered himself in Daniel’s embrace for the last time.  
> “Later,” He replied, and yet he still hugging Daniel, didn’t want to let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday Morning, Lovelies~~!  
> Are you guys excited for this week's update? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

* * *

 

The morning felt both slow and quick at the same time.

They prepared a simple breakfast meal using eggs and mini sausages along with a bowl of mixed grain rice, topped with laver flakes. Daniel took out his mother’s cabbage and cubed radish kimchi, along with some julienned _danmuji_. 

 

Seongwoo turned the television on—the morning news sounded formal yet cheerful in the background. The weather man joked along with the forecast girl about the probability of heat wave later in the afternoon, the girl reminded everyone to use sunscreen and drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.

 

Daniel had placed their breakfast on the usual small table, and the two of them sat almost side by side, their folded knees brushed against each other. They sat on the carpet, the atmosphere was lax and cozy. The morning show showed an simple animation about heat stroke prevention on the next section, and Daniel’s latest single which featured Zico was played as the background music. 

 

The single was released several months ago, and the catchy song was often used during TV clips like this. Seongwoo teased Daniel about it, and the younger male blushed since he was still couldn’t believe that he had worked and made friends with Zico. “Ah, stop teasing me—“ Daniel protested. Seongwoo just laughed back. Daniel pretended to not hearing Seongwoo’s tease, focused on his radish kimchi instead—the side dish was crispy and produced a rather crisp sound everytime he chew.

 

It felt like a mundane morning, yet it felt so precious and intimate. The simple meal tasted really delicious, and Daniel paused for a while to stare at Seongwoo. “What,” The raven haired nudged him, a rather wide smile plastered on his lips. Daniel’s eyes were filled with adoration; he laughed, his laugh was saccharine sweet. “Nothing,” He said, and Seongwoo didn’t buy it at all. 

 

“Yah, nothing? You thought I would believe that lame excuse…?” He pretended to punch Daniel’s arm. Daniel didn’t evade it—the light punches felt nothing, but he pretended to be in pain. “Ah, my arm hurts so bad,” He exaggerated his reaction, “What to do, aigooo… I need a compensation for this—“

 

“Stop it,” Seongwoo chuckled, “You totally sounded like those cheapass scammer thug characters…!”

 

“Ah, what to do—“ Daniel kept pretending, pursed his lips and clutched his arm, “This handsome gentleman didn’t want to kiss me as the compensation, aigoo—“

 

“Come here you brat…!” Seongwoo was still laughing, but he caught Daniel’s shoulder and pulled him in; half-cirled his arms around Daniel and gave the younger male’s cheeks a loud, wet kiss each: _muah muah._ Daniel quickly put his arms around Seongwoo’s waist and hoisted him into his lap; refused to let the older male go. 

 

“Not enough,” He demanded in childish tone. Seongwoo puffed and pretended to pout, put his palm on Daniel’s lips and pushed away, “Let me go, ah this brat—“ Daniel whined, still didn’t want to let go. “Not enouuughhh…” He whined more, and Seongwoo made a loud _tsk_ before he cupped the Busan-born’s face and gave another kisses on his cheeks, his forehead, the tip of his nose, followed with peppering pecks on those pink lips. 

 

Daniel smiled as he was finally kissed on the lips. He cradled Seongwoo and gave the older male a nuzzle before leaned in once more and kissed the latter whole-heartedly. It felt right to have the raven haired in his arms; it felt like something natural, so perfectly right—what it should be. He gave another pecks and lingered on those lips, sucked on Seongwoo’s swollen lower lip before he chuckled.

 

“What?” Seongwoo asked, and Daniel gave another laugh before he replied, “Your lips tasted like kimchi.”

 

Seongwoo gave him the smirk. “So do you.” He still got his arms around Daniel’s shoulder, tugged the blonde haired closer, “Now come here you, kimchi radish boy.” 

 

Daniel just laughed, and complied.

 

* * *

 

Youngsik came to pick Daniel later than expected. While he told Daniel would come during the afternoon, Youngsik came to the apartment around mid-evening. The manager had deliberately gave them some extra time together, and every seconds of it counts. When the call finally rang and Youngsik told Daniel that he was downstairs and parked the van right to the lift area, both of him and Seongwoo frowned.

 

“It’s time…?” Seongwoo asked, still glued onto him. They were cuddling together on the couch, spending hours talking in their current position. It felt comfortable and non of them wanted to actually move. Seongwoo was half-lied atop of Daniel, who lied on the couch with heaps of throw pillows supported his back. “Yeah,” Daniel replied, traces of glum heard on his voice. “I need to go now.”

 

Seongwoo wanted to say something selfish, something corny like _I don’t want you to leave_ , but he held himself back. They were professional and Daniel need to got back to his schedule. Reluctantly, Seongwoo moved from his position and let Daniel left the couch. His backpack was ready, Daniel took it from the floor and put it on his left shoulder before he turned back to Seongwoo.

 

“See you later,” He said, but he still didn’t move even a step away from his standing position. Seongwoo stepped forward instead, surrendered himself in Daniel’s embrace for the last time. “Later,” He replied, and yet he still hugging Daniel, didn’t want to let him go. “We still got a few things scheduled together,” He said as he felt Daniel’s heartbeats against his own, their pulses synched into a rhythmical sets of beats. It felt like he was trying to convince the two of them.

 

“Yeah,” Daniel hummed his agreement, but he was still hugging Seongwoo. The older male was still leaned onto him, sighed as he closed his eyes and finally, finally peeled himself from the embrace. “Youngsik Hyung is waiting,” He said, almost a whisper.

 

“Yeah,” Daniel repeated the yeah as his response, and reluctantly let go of Seongwoo before took several steps forward to the door. He opened it and just before the door was closed, he waved another goodbye, “I’ll call you when I reached home.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Youngsik Hyung didn’t say anything when Daniel entered the van. His artist took quite a time before reaching down, but Youngsik saw the expression on Daniel’s face and didn’t comment anything. He merely started the car and drove over the exit, hitting the road. It was a quiet trip back to the MMO dorm. It would took another hour or so until the sun goes down, so the sky was still bright and sunny when they passed through the street. Daniel closed the mini curtain on the car’s window and took the ipad Hyunsik Hyung had placed on the seat. 

 

There was a list of questions on the pdf document, the one would be asked during the radio interview tomorrow. The broadcast would took place during the lunch time during the premium 12 to 1 PM, aimed towards people who had their lunch break. Daniel re-read the questions again, made a mental note about his answers. He had learned about the questions and asked Seongwoo’s opinions about the things he didn’t remember.

 

Truthfully, it was scary. Daniel worried if the DJ would asked him about something he didn’t remember—what if he didn’t have a clue at all and couldn’t answer the question? He couldn’t just confess _“Oh, remember when I hit my head and admitted to the hospital last time? Well, now I got an amnesia.”_ especially after the direct order from the higher-ups to keep his condition a secret. He just hoped that everything would be alright. 

 

Magazines and brand photoshoots would be easier, but the current him didn’t have the experience and gracefulness of his former experienced self. He had studied his CFs and read those reports about how those brands got a really huge boost by choosing him as their model, but he wasn’t sure if he could pull all of the poses up.

 

“What’s the latest status of _DASH!Idol_ ☆ ?” Daniel asked, remembered the show that caused it all. Youngsik stole a quick glance trough the rear mirror, “The PD hadn’t contacted us again. They would though, as soon as they finished their internal problems and do another publications. It seemed that it won’t happened soon, I guess.”

 

“Hmm,” Daniel didn’t know how to response. He focused back to the ipad, reading all the questions listed. Most of them are basic, several of them are personal questions, but some are related to WANNA ONE and his solo career. He felt uneasy, afraid if he gave the wrong answer during the live broadcast. 

 

They reached the dorm in no time. Daniel took his backpack and went upstairs to their floor. Youngsik Hyung went again to picked up Jisung, so the dorm was empty when he unlocked the front door. It was clean and tidy when he stepped in into the living room—they got special cleaning service lady that helped them to tidied the place from time to time. Usually the ahjumma came when they went for a schedule; it kinda felt like the hotel’s housekeeping service: they went out and came back to a clean and tidy place.

 

The cleaning lady won’t clean their room though, expect they were asked for the help. The ones they cleaned are the common rooms like living room, kitchen and the bathroom. Daniel’s room looked exactly the same as he left it before, chaotic as if someone just robbed his room and made a mess of everything. He packed his belongings in rather a hurry and things got messy. 

 

“Ah,” Daniel pursed his lips as he placed his backpack on the floor by the bed. He stood there for a minute, examined his whole room and made a mental note before he took his bag again and dumped his belongings on the carpet. The first thing he do was throwing the empty jelly packs and food containers from his room. He and Jisung got this dirty habit of keeping the food trash near their bed as they often snacked in bed and went lazy to clean them immediately. 

Then he started to sorted his clothes, along with the ones scattered on his room. Several of them were used already, so he put the on the ‘wash’ pile. The other ones, he threw back to the bed—it was the ‘fold and put back’ pile.

 

He put the clothes from the wash pile to the dirty hamper by the bathroom, then he went back to his room and started to fold the other piles neatly. He put them on the wardrobe’s rack, hang some of the special material clothes, made sure that he put them on the correct designated places since some clothes were sponsored and need to be put together for easier find on the next occasion.

 

Next, he tidied his bed—changed his bedsheets and his pillow cases. He dumped the old ones on the dirty clothes hamper as well, then he turned on his humidifier before he tidied the products on the small vanity cabinet near his bed, next to his bedside table. He went back and forth to cleaned and tidied the room. He did a quick vacuum for the floor and carpet, then finally, he finished. It wasn’t as meticulous as Minhyun’s, but at least his room didn’t looked like a pigsty anymore.

 

Daniel went for a quick shower, letting the cool water hit his skin. He washed his hair, conditioned them, then he soaped himself while waiting the conditioner do wonders to his hair. The ones he used was the color treatment type, the one he left on Seongwoo’s place as well. When he done rinsing, he stepped out from the bathroom wearing a short pants and a sleeveless thin shirt. 

 

It was still the end of July, so summer began to reach its peak. The weather was sweltering hot without the air conditioner. The government sometimes sent the heat wave warning as well—this year’s temperature was rather hotter than the previous summer. 

 

“Is it the cause of the global warming…?” Daniel wondered as he gave up and turned on the AC unit. Cool breeze blewn into the room, and suddenly Daniel remembered that he hadn’t contacted Seongwoo yet. He threw himself on the bed—drying his wet hair using his towel in one hand, calling Seongwoo using his phone on the other hand.

 

The call was picked up immediately, and Seongwoo’s voice felt warm as he greeted. “So you do remember to call.”

 

Daniel laughed, “Sorry, just tidied up my room. Then I got so sweaty I need to take a bath…”

 

“Excuses.”

 

“I miss you already,” Daniel tried his sweetest tone, and Seongwoo laughed. “Don’t try to sweet-talked me, young man.” The tease made Daniel chuckled endlessly. “Well,” He said between his laughs, “I didn’t sweet-talk. I just stated the truth.”

 

Seongwoo didn’t replied, so Daniel asked him again. “What are you doing at the moment?” There was a pause before Seongwoo changed his tone into a slow, seductive tone. “I’m on my bed at the moment, Mr. Kang,” The way Seongwoo called him was so full of tease, “I’m hot and bothered. Unlike you, I haven’t take a bath yet. My lover promised to call me, so I waited for him. Tell me Mr. Kang… what should I do?”

 

“Seongwoo-ya, you sounded like… wait, is it sexting—ah, no—that’s when you text. What’s the term for calling—“ Daniel was rather flustered. He wanted to laugh, but his cheeks felt hot. He imagined Seongwoo lied on his bed, posing a rather suggestive position, messy hair and hazy eyes, red luscious lips slowly spoke to the phone, “I, um— Wait, did we roleplay like this before…?”

 

“Sssttt,” Seongwoo hushed him, “You are ruining the mood.”

 

“Seong—“

 

“Mr. Kang,” Seongwoo hushed him again, his voice sounded really inviting, “The summer’s weather was really… _hot_.” He made the last word sounded so dirty and sinful. “I’m sweaty all over, Mr. Kang…” Daniel gulped as Seongwoo’s breath tickled him through the static voice of the phone call. The older male even added a soft, low moan that made Daniel’s coherent mind flew right away through the window. 

 

“Mr. Kang…” The dragged tone of the last syllable teased Daniel so much, pushed him into the brim of his sanity. He could picture Seongwoo’s face, dusted in crimson with those misty, dazed eyes. He could imagined the gleam on those dark orbs, how the corner of Seongwoo’s lips curled upwards, and how those wet, red tongue swept across his lower lip. “Tell me… what should I do…? Hmmmm…?”

 

Daniel gulped.

 

* * *

 

**BONUS**

****

[_Black Cat! Ong, fellas?_ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)](https://twitter.com/RE_ONG950825/status/1066565783789101056)

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...more steamy scenes on the next update, guys? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) [Y/N?]
> 
> =====  
> Btw just in case you haven't checked them out, I participated in these events:  
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> It's an OngNiel's fic fest. They would start posting the fics anonymously starting from 19th of Nov (WANNA ONE Comeback date, fellas?) so please check them out~! The postings will be publicized around 9PM KST everyday. Can you guess which one is my oneshot? LOLZ~ **HINT: MINE HAD BEEN UPLOADED.** Some of you guys had commented as well :)) 
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	22. Please, Mr. Kang…

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another NSFW chapter ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~~!  
> It's another Monday and here I am... presenting yet another NSFW chapter /ufufufu~
> 
> Enjoy~!!

* * *

 

_“Tell me… what should I do…? Hmmmm…?”_

 

Daniel gulped. “Hyung,” He stuttered, “I—“ He couldn’t finished his sentence as Seongwoo hushed him once again. “Stop with the _Hyung_ , Niel-ah! And you’re keep ruining the mood.” He hate it when Daniel addressed him like that, reminded him to the times Daniel addressed him as a mere older acquaintance. The younger male felt so helpless. He was rather embarrassed, “But I didn’t what to do—“

 

“Just go with your guts,” Seongwoo advised him, “Think this… *cough* as one of acting method *cough* Just think for a bit and blurt what you just say in your mind. Okay?”

 

“…okay.” Daniel cleared his throat. “But seriously, are we doing this often—“

 

Seongwoo ignored his question, “Do you wearing anything at the moment, Mr. Kang…?” Daniel almost choked by his own saliva. _Seriously what kind of kink is this….! This kitten acted so deviously seductive—what to do ah…_ “Wear…?” He dumbly let his inner shock slipped out. Tried to maintained the roleplay, Seongwoo gave a low hum, “Well… you said that you had just finished your shower. So tell me Mr. Kang… do you wearing anything at the moment?”

 

“Take a guess,” Daniel finally cooperated. He tried his best to not laughing; impersonating a cool and nonchalant gentleman, a perfect dominant—? Master? Dad—dy? _Cough._ _Deep inside, at the moment I’m still the budding 22 years old, Seongwoo-ya…! I didn’t know if we had done these kind of plays before, but I didn’t have any recollection of these roleplays…!_ ฅ =͟͟͞͞(( ꒪ Д  ꒪ ;) ฅ

 

“Oh,” Seongwoo paused for a second, “Are you wearing a bathrobe, Mr. Kang…?” He wasn’t, but that’s not the point. Daniel lowered the pitch of his voice and asked the older male with a really low, deep voice, “Do you want me to wear a bathrobe, Seongwoo-ya? Or do you want me to barely wear anything?”

 

The bass tone sent shivers onto Seongwoo’s spine. He flailed his arm and made some punches to the thin air. _Daniel’s low voice was so lethal!_ “Cat caught your tongue…?” Daniel asked him again, since Seongwoo haven’t responded the last question, “It was a little bit too late to get speechless now, hmmm?” _Aigoo, stop humming in such a low tone like that—it was too sinful!_ Seongwoo felt dizzy. Suddenly he understood the phrase of _‘shooting himself in the foot’._ Minutes ago it was Daniel whom flustered from their play, but now it was him who unable to give a proper response.

 

“Well, I don’t know Mr. Kang,” His voice was a little husky when he finally replied, “A bathrobe would be nice… but…” _You can do this, Seongwoo. You can! Go, fighting!_ “…I prefer that you didn’t wear anything, I guess.”

 

“Ah, that’s too bad,” Daniel chuckled, “I got a shirt and a pants on. Should I strip for you, then?”

 

Seongwoo gulped. 

 

“But you know,” Daniel’s voice turned into a seductive whisper, “It won’t be fair if I’m the only one who take my clothes off… say, Seongwoo-ya… you said that you’re hot and bothered right?”

 

_Lord, why did Daniel turned into an incubus like this—!!_ Seongwoo’s brain felt as if it was short-circuited. He was joking around when he teased Daniel with the play, wanted to make the younger male flustered. Now suddenly the table had turned; Seongwoo felt like he was picking up a rock and ended up smashing his own feet. 

 

“Yes, Mr. Kang…?” He pretended to be innocent instead. Daniel was using his low voice again, “Do you wearing anything then, Seongwoo-ya? It must be uncomfortable. Since you said that you’re sweaty, do they stick to your skin?”

 

“…” Seongwoo flushed as the dirty talk continued, but he preserved, “They do.”

 

“So what are you waiting for, hmmm?” Daniel’s tone turned relaxed, he dragged the sentences into a lazy, seductive manner, “Take them off.”

 

Seongwoo was dumbfounded. He froze after hearing Daniel’s last sentence. It was true that he was the one initiated the play, but now he truly didn’t know what to do. Should he followed the order or just pretend—?

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel’s voice entered his ear once more, this time it sounded with a tinge of irritation, “Are you a good boy or a bad boy?” Seongwoo’s brain suddenly turned blank. _Wait. What just happened?_ But despite of him being stunned like that, his mouth was faster than his mind. “I’m a good boy…”

 

“I’m a good boy, Mr. Kang,” Daniel corrected him, finally immersed himself to the role. The dominant role hold the power after all, and the taste of superiority was indeed sweet. Daniel started to have fun with the play, his lips curled up into a smirk.

 

“Say it, Seongwoo,” He made his voice sounded stern. He was using his usual tone whenever he scolded his cats, and it seemed that Seongwoo actually responded him well enough. _Just go with your guts,_ Seongwoo told him before. So Daniel went full throttle and just dive in into the play. “Say it.”

 

“I’m a good boy, Mr. Kang,” Seongwoo copied him. His tone was meek. Once again, it was his mouth that acted faster than his brain. Seongwoo wanted to kick himself for actually responding, but somehow there’s a strange feeling swirled inside his chest as he followed the order. It was rather… pleasant. _OH GOD DID I JUST TURNED INTO A PERVERT?!_

 

“Seongwoo,” The way Daniel called him sent jolts of excitement to his spine, “I’ve told you to take off your clothes, haven’t I?”

“You have, Mr. Kang…”

 

“So why you haven’t take them off yet, hmmm?” The dragged tone on the _hmmm_ made Seongwoo blushed even further. He felt like he was digging his own grave, and apparently he was a little bit too success digging it. Now the pit was dark and deep and he felt like those envoy from the 300 movie, ready to be kicked down to the hole within one breath.

 

Seongwoo truly didn’t know what to do, so he followed Daniel’s lead and took off his shirt. From the other side of the line, Daniel could hear the rustles of the clothes and his smirk went even wider. “Good boy,” He praised, and Seongwoo felt another shiver. His heart started to pound faster, almost irregularly.

 

“Where are you now?”

 

“…my bedroom,” Seongwoo answered, and Daniel corrected him again, “I’m in my bedroom, Mr. Kang.”

 

Seongwoo held his breath for a second. “I’m… in my bedroom, Mr. Kang. I’m sitting on my bed…”

 

“Are you waiting for my command, Seongwoo-ya?”

 

“I am, Mr. Kang…”

 

There was a side inside of him that wanted to yell _This is ridiculous…!_ and ended the stupid game, but Seongwoo just couldn’t. He waited for Daniel’s reaction, and in a really low voice the younger male spoke through the phone.

 

“Remember the last time I did you, Seongwoo-ya…?”

 

“I…did,” Seongwoo quickly added, “…Mr. Kang.”

 

“Oh?” Seongwoo could hear the smirk on Daniel’s voice. “So… you remembered how I touched you then? The way my fingers caressed your skin—?”

 

Seongwoo felt it again—the shivers on his spine. He felt excited. The play was embarrassing and felt so wrong, but it lit the desire he never knew resided inside of him. “Mmm…” He nodded, breath started to rasp, “I did remember your touch… Mr. Kang…” Daniel’s hand was big and warm—those long fingers always caressed him in a really memorable manner.

 

“Good boy,” Daniel leaned on his bed, pillow supported his back as he continued, “I really love your skin. They are smooth and supple… Do you remember the feel of my fingers on your skin whenever we make love, Seongwoo-ya…?”

 

Instead of replying, Seongwoo brushed his skin with own fingers and let a soft moan out as he did fantasized it was Daniel who touched him. He ran his fingers on his nape, his collarbone, down to his chest, then his torso. “Seongwoo-ya…” Daniel called his name, “Touch yourself for me. Imagine that it was me that holding and caressing you.”

 

“Hmmm,” Seongwoo tried to suppress his voice by biting his lower lip. Even before the order, he already did it. He could hear the rustle of Daniel’s clothes from the other side of the call, followed by a faint wet sound that really familiar. Seongwoo blushed, hard. His cheeks were dusted with deep crimson hue, as well as the tip of his ears, down to his neck and shoulder. _Daniel… was pleasuring himself at the moment? While hearing my voice… and imagined that we are together at the moment…?_

 

“Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel’s voice was husky, “I’m caressing you right now… can you feel it?”

 

“Ummhh—“ Seongwoo moaned his confirmation. He followed Daniel’s instruction, touched and rubbed wherever area the younger male told him to. He half-lied on his bed, soft pillows beneah his waist, his body arched everytime he touched his sensitive spots, complied every Daniel’s order. “Touch both of your nipples for me,” Daniel ordered again. His voice was dangerously low, so rasp, transmitted clearly right to Seongwoo’s ears. The raven haired shivered from the tingling sensation, trembled as he caressed the hardened nubs; slowly pinched and twisted them. He did it like Daniel did them, teased them in such manner it felt so torturous. 

 

“Do you feel it…?” Daniel closed his own eyes, pictured his lover following every order he gave. His breath ragged as he pushed his body forward, quickening the movement of his hand. Seongwoo’s moans and whimpers made the desire inside of him filled to the brim—his shaft was hard and pulsating against his palm. The head was leaking pre-cum crazily.

 

“I… am feeling it…” Seongwoo whimpered again, “Mr. Kang… I couldn’t handle it anymore…”

 

“Do you want to come, Seongwoo-ya?”

 

“Ngghhh—“ Seongwoo trashed himself, his toes curling, “Yes, Mr. Kang. I… want to come… Please Mr. Kang…”

 

“Touch yours,” Daniel guided, chest heaved as he licked his lower lip impatiently. He touched his own shaft, kneaded them and rubbed some more as he remembered how Seongwoo’s lithe body felt against him. Every curves, every nooks and cranny of his lover’s body was perfect. Daniel grunted as he remembered how those long limbs always clings onto him, desperate as Daniel pounded him over and over, hard and almost ruthless.

 

Seongwoo followed Daniel’s instruction, moaned loudly as he rubbed his own member using his hands. Yet, it felt different. His own hands felt different from Daniel’s—and he felt like he was still missing something. He did everything Daniel told him, but eventhough the sickening pleasure washed him over and over, he couldn’t reach his peak yet.

 

“Mr. Kang… Mr. Kang—“ Seongwoo rasped, “I— still couldn’t…” He curled his body, slowly went into all fours. He put his phone by his ear, holding it as he rubbed himself to the sheet. He moved his hips, and finally realized it: his body was too accustomed to Daniel’s and he had never pleasured himself anymore after they got together. He didn’t need to. Their sex was frequent enough, almost like clockwork. Daniel got way more stamina than him, and the younger male always left him spent and blissfuly satisfied after their rounds.

 

“You couldn’t orgasm without me, right Seongwoo-ya…?” Daniel guessed correctly. Seongwoo moaned again, this time in desperation. “I couldn’t, Mr. Kang…” He whimpered. His body felt strange. He felt burning hot, unsatisfied. He wanted more.

 

“Do your hole twitch for me, Seongwoo-ya…?”

 

As it was on cue, Seongwoo trembled. His body shook. Both of his legs gave out, and indeed—his small opening twitched in anticipation. “Do you remember how I fill you, hmmm?” Daniel did another of the lazy, dragged tone that send shivers to Seongwoo’s spine. He gulped, “Mmm…”

 

“Do you remember…” Daniel whispered, “…how I pound you? How I thrusted myself… inside and out of you? Do you remember the sensation, Seongwoo-ya?”

 

Seongwoo’s body jerked in response. Feeling breathless, he released a breath that he didn’t realize that he was holding while listening to Daniel’s dirty teasings. “Fill me, Mr. Kang…” He heard himself begged. This time, he didn’t feel any shame for begging his lover. 

 

“Good boy,” Daniel praised him again, and Seongwoo’s head was too muddled to feel any shame—he felt happy to be praised over and over using the term. “Lube yourself,” Daniel instructed, and Seongwoo fumbled his drawer, found his almost emptied lube bottle. He squirted the slick liquid to his palm, covered his opening and coated his fingers, following Daniel’s guidance. 

 

“Now, push it in,” Daniel ordered him, and Seongwoo complied with a soft “Ngghhh” escaped from his lips. His own ring of muscles welcomed him, enjoyed the intrusion. His inner muscles spasmed, and Seongwoo moaned again as he pushed his finger further. Never before he imagined he would do these kind of act, pleasuring his own back channel like this.

 

“Thrust it… again. Do it repeatedly.”

 

Seongwoo complied, bit his lower lip and slowly felt his opening became soft, loosened. “Insert another finger, just the way I always prepare you,” Daniel’s voice was clouded with the noise of his slick against his palm. He rubbed his own erected member, imagined that he buried himself inside Seongwoo.

 

The raven haired’s toes curled as he did a scissoring motion. In every ministration he could felt his inner walls spasmed. He probed deeper and found his own sweet spot—the small nub on his prostate gave him too much sensation as he repeatedly stimulated it. “Daniel—Niel… Niel…” Seongwoo was calling his lover’s name instead of _Mr. Kang_ that they played before.

 

This time, Daniel didn’t mind Seongwoo swayed from the play. The sound of his ragged breaths and moans were driving Daniel crazy. He recognized the tone of Seongwoo’s voice, the older male was so close to his peak. The MMO idol picked his own pace and moaned along with Seongwoo, his low grunts felt so close to Seongwoo’s ears. He raised his hips slightly and fingered himself furiously, the intense pleasure made it felt like Daniel was there with him, pounding him good and hard.

 

“Niel…!”

 

With a long yelp, Seongwoo came. He spurted onto the sheet, stained them with wet patches. On the same time, Daniel peaked and released his seeds. He covered his length using the towel he used earlier and managed to not dirtying his fresh sheet. It would be troublesome if he need to change his bedsheet once again when he was just finished doing so a while ago.

 

For a whole minute, nothing said between them. The two of them enjoyed that post-orgasm’s pleasure. Daniel blinked as he stared on the ceiling of his room. Their roleplay felt too exciting, and he was glad that Seongwoo initiated it. 

 

On the other hand, Seongwoo felt so embarassed. When his head slowly cleared, he remembered how slutty he acted in the beginning of the play. He remembered how he followed every order Daniel gave him. He was trying to tease the younger male, but got dominated in the end.

 

“Want to this again in the future, using video call instead?” Daniel asked, a smirk plastered on his face. It took a couple of seconds before Seongwoo finally regulated his breath and reacted. “Pervert! Shameless…!” then he cut off the call.

 

Daniel just laughed.

 

* * *

 

Daniel was just finished his second bath when Jisung opened their front door. 

He came alone, looked tired as his shoulder slumped. For a split second Daniel worried if Jisung would notice his previous deed, but the older man didn’t think much as he entered the living room and sat on the sofa. “Oh, you’re just finished bathing?” He asked when he saw the towel on Daniel’s shoulder, in a tone that really similar with Eomma’s way of speaking. 

 

“Hmm,” Daniel only replied in agreement, nodded his head quietly and busied himself by drying his wet hair using his new towel. He had washed the previous one, since it was soiled with his semen earlier. His cheeks were rather hot—if only Jisung knew that it was his second bath after he reached the dorm… 

 

“Have you eaten yet?” Jisung asked him, and Daniel shook his head. “Not yet.”

 

“Let’s order something then,” Jisung suggested, “What do you want to eat?”

 

Daniel didn’t have a particular food he craved at the moment, but he was sure famished. “Chicken?” He suggested. There was a 24 hours BBQ Olive Fried Chicken on the next block, and their reviews was great. He didn’t know if they had ordered the chicken before or not, but since his amnesia Daniel didn’t recall ordering one. 

 

“Sure,” Jisung didn’t mind. He ordered via a delivery app, and a quarter later the delivery man appeared in front of their door. Jisung had ordered two boxes of new flavoured chicken: one with the red spicy sauce and one with savory and sweet honey glaze. They ate the chicken with some beer, because chicken and beer was a match made in heaven, indeed.

 

“You’ll go to the radio interview tomorrow, right?” Jisung asked. He was preparing for another musical; and eventhough it was quite several months away, they got a practice schedule tomorrow as well. Previously, Jisung was really worried about Daniel and wanted to at least accompanied him to the radio show for moral support—but after their schedule clashed, he wasn’t able to go.

 

“Hmm,” Daniel nodded, fingers stained with the spicy sauce. “Don’t eat too much of the spicy one,” Jisung reminded him, “I worried you’ll get stomachache later. Remember to drink more water, sleep early today, don’t forget to treat your skin before you go to bed as well.”

 

“Yes, Mom.”

 

“I’m being serious here,” Jisung deadpanned, “If you need anything tomorrow, call me or Youngsik, okay?”

 

“Okay.”

 

After dinner, Daniel went back to his room. He took his phone and texted Seongwoo, but the latter was still pouting and left him on the read. 

 

 

_Seongwoo-ya_

_What are you doing at the moment?_

_Have you eaten yet?_

**_Daniel. 08:03 PM._ **

 

 

Daniel took his ipad as soon as he plopped to his bed. He skimmed the question list again, and at this moment he already memorized his answers by heart. He only hope that nothing will go wrong tomorrow. _I felt like student facing a test_ , he laughed internally.

 

Following Jisung’s suggestion, he applied his skincare—layered the products on his skin. The set had some steps by steps products, and today he didn’t dare to be lazy and skipped the routine. He glanced at the clock and realized that it was already 11. Seongwoo haven’t reply to his text, but Daniel texted him again anyway.

 

 

_I’ll go to sleep now_

_Wish me luck for tomorrow_

_Good night, Seongwoo-ya_

**_Daniel. 11:16 PM._ **

 

 

The status changed into sent, then immediately turned into read. This time, an reply popped up right after.

 

 

_Good luck for tomorrow, you can do it!_

**_Seongwoo. 11:17 PM._ **

 

_Sleep tight, sweet dream_

_Have a good night rest_

**_Seongwoo. 11:18 PM._ **

 

_Don’t forget to dream about me~_

_Good night, Mr. Kang ;)_

_[kiss emoticon]_

**_Seongwoo. 11:19 PM._ **

 

 

Daniel smiled as he saw the messages. He wanted to tease Seongwoo again, but he held himself back as he didn’t want to make the older male upset with him again. So he typed his reply and clutched the phone against his chest as he slowly drifted to sleep.

 

_See you later in my dreams, then ;)_

**_Daniel. 11:19 PM._ **

 

* * *

 

They went to the radio interview around 9 in the morning. 

Youngsik had bought him some gimbap, so Daniel ate it during the ride. The radio interview would be also videotaped and streamed along with the radio broadcast, so they need to reach there by 10 to get Daniel’s make up done. Daniel was rather anxious during the journey to the radio’s building. 

 

The building was five stories tall, with modern architecture style. Dominated with rows of woods, the front of the building looked kinda rustic and homey. The inside’s interior was simplistic with minimalistic furnitures. There were a cafe downstairs, with a few selections of coffees and pastries. It looked rather cozy, but he didn’t want any coffee at the moment. Caffeine would only made him jitter more.

 

Then, a notifications popped up on his phone. The group chat was rather lively. Daniel smiled as he read all of the messages.

 

 

**Sparrow:** Niel Hyung, when’ll your interview aired?

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Lunch time, right? CMIIW

**CutiePieDaehwi:** I’ll listen, Hyung!

 

**Eomma:** Niel-ah, good luck with the interview!

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Niel Hyung

**GulliverMaknae:** Fighting!

 

**ManduCheeks:** I’ll tune in and listen~

**ManduCheeks:** Good luck with the radio show~!

 

**NamjaJihoon:** You can do it, Hyung!

 

**HwangEmperor:** Hope all be well

**HwangEmperor:** Fighting, Niel!

 

**DarkBae:** I’ve told my classmates to listen as well :)

 

**CloudFairy:** You can do it, Niel!

 

**Nielie:** Thanks guys :)

**Nielie:** Yeah it will aired during lunch

**Nielie:** I hope I won’t misspoke or anything XDXD

 

**BlackCat:** You can do it

**BlackCat:** We believe in you, Mr. Kang ;)

 

 

The other didn’t realize the meaning of Seongwoo’s _Mr. Kang_ , but Daniel immediately blushed. 

 

 

**CloudFairy:** Yo look who’s showed up

**CloudFairy:** Mr. Boyfriend had spoken

 

**BlackCat:** It’s indeed my privilege, Hyung 

**BlackCat:** [bear and conny kissing emoticon]

 

**CloudFairy:** …stop the PDA aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**CloudFairy:** Spare us the single peopleeeeeeeeeeeee

 

 

His waiting room was decent sized—the make up artist Noona do her work without much hassle. She complimented Daniel’s skin, then he began her work in silence. It was a radio show, so Daniel didn’t need a lot of make up. She just fixed the slight blemishes, evened out his skin’s tone, accented his eyes and put a tinted pink colour on his lips. She styled his hair as well—nothing too crazy, just a little gel to gave his hair more volume.

 

“You’re done,” She declared, nodded as she collected her tools. Daniel stared at his own reflection on the mirror, looked sharp yet friendly—really pleasing to the eyes. He smiled and thanked the make up Noona.

 

“Are you ready?” Youngsik Hyung asked him, there was a slight concern on his eyes. Slowly Daniel nodded, “I’m ready.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I did a good job with the phone sex...  
> /runaway/
> 
> =====  
> Btw just in case you haven't checked them out, I participated in these events:  
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> It's an OngNiel's fic fest. They would start posting the fics anonymously starting from 19th of Nov (WANNA ONE Comeback date, fellas?) so please check them out~! The postings will be publicized around 9PM KST everyday. Can you guess which one is my oneshot? LOLZ~ **HINT: MINE HAD BEEN UPLOADED.** Some of you guys had commented as well :)) 
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	23. They Don't Know About Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you have a particular member you really miss and want to meet, Kang Daniel-ssi?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday morning for you guys, my lovelies~~  
> And happy birthday to Uri Busan Boi Nielie~~!!
> 
> Happy 23th birthday, Daniel~~!!  
> Wish you lots and lots of love, luck, health and happiness!  
> May all your dreams come true and be prosperous as ever :D

 

* * *

 

_“I’m ready.”_

 

It wasn’t a bluff, but truthfully, Daniel was still so nervous. After all, he had no recollection about his past appearance on any radio shows. His last memories stopped during his trainee era. He had prepared his answers beforehand, but he was still nervous—afraid that he would slipped and made a mistake.

 

The ON AIR signal was lit, the green sign was bright and dazzling. There were so many microphones else the main one used for the DJ and the main guests, but they won’t use all of the side ones today. Daniel acted as the main and only guest. He was seated on the comfy chair next to the DJ. Else than the on air interview, he was also videotaped for the show’s later release. There was two stationed camera, ready to shoot him. The cameramen had checked the camera and nodded to Daniel as the recording mode’s red signal was turned on.

 

_I hope I didn’t make any mistake…_

 

The show’s staff made the cue gesture, signalling 3, 2, and 1 with his fingers. The DJ nodded and immediately greeted the audience after the opening jingle ended. “Good afternoon everyone! We meet again today at your lunch’s special programme! What do you guys have for lunch? Or is there anyone who stuck in a traffic at the moment? Or is there anyone still busy at work and didn’t have time to eat yet?”

 

There’s a laugh sound effect, then the DJ continued, “Omo, whichever it was… I hope everyone have a nice time at the moment! Today we got another heat warning, so prepare yourself if you are going out into the sun, okay guys?”

 

Then, he moved on and mentioned that today’s guest was really special. “Can you guys guessed it?” The DJ made it sounded like a game quiz, with fingers drumroll he gave the hints, “We got the man who always mentioned at least once a day by the media. He was brands’s favourite spokenperson—any brand signed him as a model had experienced a huge jump in sales. He sold out so many products he endorsed, one brand in particular even stated that they got more than 700x result in revenue. Our guest was recently on a break after an incident that sent him to the hospital. Aigoo, the netizen was chaos that day! But thankfully he was okay and now he’s here with us… Kang Daniel-ssi…!” 

 

“Hello everyone, I’m Kang Daniel,” He greeted the microphone with his best cheerful tone. He almost said ‘WANNA ONE’s Kang Daniel’ but he immediately corrected himself. 

 

“It’s such an honour to have you here,” The DJ greeted him, and Daniel bowed back. “Ah no, no. It was my honour to be here. Thank you for inviting me to the show.”

 

“Ah, don’t be so modest, you have so much achievements, Kang Daniel-ssi…!”

 

“I’m thankful,” He chuckled, shyly scratched his head, “But aigoo, I’m feeling bashful—being praised so much like this. I still got so many things to learn.”

 

“Ah, talking about something to learn—“ The DJ clapped his hand and asked, “Let’s talk about your acting. I heard that you would appeared as a cameo on The Summer’s Constellation?”

 

“That’s right,” Daniel nodded, “I haven’t got the script yet, but it was true that I’ll appear as a cameo.”

 

“Ah so you didn’t know yet about the cameo role then?”

 

“I didn’t,” Daniel shook his head and laughed, “But I did asked the writer to give me a role that interact a lot with Seongwoo Hyung’s character. After all, I agreed to be a cameo because of him. He taught me briefly during our Beautiful’s MV. It was different to act for a music video and a film, though. That’s why I want to learn more.”

 

“So you considered acting as one of your future plan then?”

 

“Compared to Seongwoo Hyung, my acting skill is still lacking by a whole lot though.”

 

“So you are not denying that you considered acting as one of your future plan?” The DJ asked him again. Daniel made a quick gesture using his hands, “It’s not like I’m pursuing it—but yeah learn to act would help me hone my skills, right? There were another idols that act in movies. I want to give my best if I was given an opportunity.”

 

The DJ nodded. He later asked about some games recommendation. Daniel wasn’t playing anything after his amnesia, but he did own some game apps in his phone. Mentioning the apps, he excused himself that these days he couldn’t play as much since he was quite busy.

 

The session was cut by an advertisement. While waiting for them to go back on air, the DJ asked him about his activities during his breaktime. “Oh,” Daniel replied, “Most of the time I used it to practice though.”

 

“On your breaktime?” The DJ raised his eyes. Daniel tried to chuckle—by practice he meant not only the dance and singing practice, but learning everything he had forgotten—crash coursing everything about WANNA ONE and his latest activities after the disband. “Of course I did rest for a few days after I went back from the hospital—I also went back to Busan to visit my mom and my sisters.”

 

“By sisters you mean…”

 

“Ah yes, the cats. I always referred them as my sisters.” Daniel laughed. The DJ nodded, “Can we talk about the cats later when we back on the air?”

 

“Sure.”

 

The advertisement’s catchphrase was ended, and they were back live on air. The DJ greeted the viewers again, “Aaannd we are back here to the studio! You guys, Kang Daniel-ssi just told me about his cats. During his breaktime, he visit home and play with his sisters. Yes, he referred the cats as his sisters. So all of them are female then, Kang Daniel-ssi?”

 

“That’s right,” Daniel nodded. “Peter and Rooney got male names, but then I realized that they were female—but it was too late to change their name so we left them as it is. Rooney was a quick runner and she got this amazing zig-zag pattern whenever she ran, so we named her from the famous soccer player. Peter loves to climb and I thought ‘Oooh, just like spiderman’ so we named her Peter from Peter Parker. I did the same mistake twice, just realizing their gender after naming them.”

 

Both of them laughed. Daniel continued, “Ori was named after the cat from Keanu Reeves’s Constantine movie. There was a cat named ‘Duck’ in the movie, so I named her Ori. For Zhang, her hangul was read as ‘Jjang’—she really close with Ori. They often sleep and play together.”

 

“I have a questions,” The DJ raised his hand, “Do you want to get another cat?”

 

“Well, I don’t really know—I adopted them from a shelter near my house. I saw them and somehow it was just clicked. You know… that feeling that suddenly ‘Ah!’? Like… eureka moment? You just know that you want to have them as a part of your family, as simple as that.”

 

“What made me curious was,” The DJ tilted his head, “Kang Daniel-ssi, if you really love them, why didn’t you bring them to your dorm instead?”

 

“I really wanted to,” Daniel replied, “But back then there were another MMO trainees that alergic to cats. Similar thing happened when I joined WANNA ONE. I couldn’t be irresponsible and bring my pet while my other members got health issues—the reaction could be worse than just rashes and itch. Beside, our schedule was so jam-packed that I’ll be worried if we left the cats in the dorm. They could feel loneliness too, just like human. I preferred them to have a greatest care, and with the cats my mom won’t be as lonely since she got companies at home. Plus, it’s also a great excuse to go back to Busan and visit my home whenever I could.”

 

“Ah, it makes sense. You’re really think ahead of things,” The DJ praised him, “Let’s talk about WANNA ONE next, shall we? It’s been a while since your disbandment. I know that you’re living in the MMO dorm with Yoon Jisung-ssi, but it wasn’t the case for other members from different agencies. Do you miss them?”

 

“Of course.” Daniel nodded firmly, “It was great to have such wonderful members. We are talking about meeting up in our group chat, but the schedules were clashing up so we tried our best to find a date that could fit anyone’s rest period. Sure we could meet some of the members during our schedules, but it won’t be the same if there wasn’t a complete eleven of us.”

 

“Do you have a particular member you really miss and want to meet, Kang Daniel-ssi?”

 

Daniel laughed again, “I want to say ‘Max’ but—“

 

“Max, as in Park Jihoon’s pet dog?” The DJ confirmed, and Daniel nodded, “Yeah, we joked about him being our 12th member.”

 

“Okay, please tell us more about the ‘but’—sorry to interrupted you earlier, Kang Daniel-ssi.”

 

“Ah, it’s okay. So—I want to say ‘Max’, but to be honest the answer is Seongwoo Hyung.”

 

“Oh?” The DJ was quite surprise to hear the answer, “But didn’t you guys meet so much during your break period these days? The two of you entered the headlines so many times, my data even said that the news topped the keywords on the search engines.”

 

“Exactly,” The edge of Daniel’s lips curled up into a perfect curve, “I missed him so much so that I was looking for him so we could meet up and hang out together. Once I tried to reach him on his drama’s location and I ended up offered a cameo role because of it.”

 

“Prove it,” The DJ challenged him, “Ah, I really curious about this—I heard that you prefer calling than texting, do you mind to show us who was the last person on your call history?”

 

Daniel blushed—because the answer is definitely Seongwoo and their last call was the sexy kink roleplay they played together; the whole teasing and ‘Mr. Kang’ mentioned by Seongwoo’s seductive tone replayed back in his mind. “Sure,” He covered the lower part of his face as he grinned. He unlocked his phone and opened the call history log. 

 

Due to Seongwoo’s previous anxiety, they had been careful: Daniel always listed Seongwoo as ‘WANNA ONE’s Ong Seongwoo’ before, since it was his habit to labeled his contacts anyway. Even after the disbandment he didn’t change it into a simpler ‘Ong Seongwoo’ because he didn’t want to add the _Hyung_ honorifics and ‘Fantagio’s Ong Seongwoo’ felt so distant and frustrated him—since it reminded him that he couldn’t live in the same dorm room with Seongwoo anymore due their different agencies. On the other hand, ’WANNA ONE’s Ong Seongwoo’ made an impression that the two of them was still tied together by the group.

 

“Oh, it was indeed Ong Seongwoo-sii as well…!” The DJ exclaimed as he saw the name of the top of the log list, “it was yesterday evening?”

 

“That’s right.”

 

“You are using… a black cat photo as the contact avatar…?” The DJ took a closer look to the round thumbnail, “Why’d a black cat?”

 

“It’s an internal joke, actually.” Daniel explained, “His mannerism and habits reminded me to a cat, a black one since his hair was mostly dark coloured.”

 

“I see,” The DJ nodded. “Now folks, I’d like to chat more with our wonderful guest, but we do have some songs to play. Let’s listen to them before we’re going back for answering more questions, okay? The first song will be the latest Summer hit—“

 

The song was aired, and with a push of a button, they were off air again. They were still being recorded though, so Daniel smiled to the camera and nodded. “Kang Daniel-ssi,” The DJ asked him, rather hesitant, “I knew it was off script, but is it possible to call Ong Seongwoo-ssi when we’re back on air later?”

 

“May I asked him first, just in case he got something to do?”

 

“Please do.”

 

Daniel immediately called Seongwoo. The raven haired was actually listened to the broadcast, his heart was filled with mixed emotions. Daniel had mentioned him repeatedly—Seongwoo grew wary as Daniel was really not shy to show his affections; in the past this will make him felt so restless and paranoid. _What if people find out about their relationship? What if this matter will cause a scandal? What if—_

 

But after their last interaction, Seongwoo had swore to change his perspective. He wanted them to be happy together, and the first step he needed to take is let go of his anxiety and trust Daniel with his whole heart.

 

When Daniel mentioned him as the member he missed the most, it would be a lie if Seongwoo said that his heart didn’t feel moved. He felt his chest filled with sentimental emotions; happy for the recognition. Then, he blushed as well when Daniel revealed that the last person he called was him—of course he remember the whole ‘Mr. Kang’ innuendo, and his cheeks felt burning hot as he recalled the whole phone sex interactions.

 

_Ringringring—_

His phone was ringing. It was from Daniel, so Seongwoo picked it up immediately. “Yeah, Niel-ah?”

 

“Seongwoo Hyung,” Daniel greeted him politely, and naturally Seongwoo knew that he would ask something related to the broadcast, “Are you available at the moment?”

 

“The radio wanted to make me a guest via a call…?” Seongwoo guessed. Daniel nodded, “That’s right, Hyung. Sorry, I know it was so sudden—“

 

“Sure,” Seongwoo laughed, “No problem. Will they call me using the radio’s phone or your phone—?” Usually it was the radio that would call the guest, but the latest broadcast was discussing the last person on Daniel’s call history. There would be a great chance that Daniel would use his personal phone to contact Seongwoo. 

 

The DJ haven’t reacted, but Daniel turned his head and ask, “Could we just call using my phone? Is that would be alright? Could the microphone picked up the loudspeaker clearly?” Inside his heart, his childish self pouted _I won’t give Seongwoo-ya’s personal number to you guys! He’s mine!_ Taken aback, the DJ just nodded. “It would be no problem.”

 

To be clearly heard, a call from the radio would be better since they could connected the line directly to the transmitter. But using the guest’s loudspeaker worked as well, so it wasn’t a big problem. Several TV shows was doing this type of approach as well, because they often call a celebrity as a prank—their friend that attended as the show’s guest would call them instead, often caught the celebrity off-guard.

 

“I’ll call you again, Seongwoo-y…Hyung.” Daniel almost addressed Seongwoo using his usual ‘Seongwoo-ya’ but quickly changed it into ‘hyung’. He knew the older male didn’t like to be called as _hyung_ during their private time together, but the call was aired publicly so he need to be polite and addressed the latter more politely.

 

“Okay, I’ll wait for your next call.” Seongwoo was amused, ended the call with a smile plastered on his face.

 

A minute later, the song was ended. They were back on air, and with a really excited tone the DJ greeted their viewers once again. “The summer had been really hot lately. Everyone, had you visited the beach yet? The river and the mountain is also a great choice! Ah, suddenly I’m craving a BBQ—“

 

The laugh sound effects filled the room, then he asked Daniel, “Ah, I almost forgot. Before the song, we had found out that the last person Kang Daniel-ssi call is Ong Seongwoo-ssi. I’ve asked if Ong Seongwoo-ssi could talk as well as our surprise guest. Aren’t you guys excited? Let’s call Kang Daniel’s most missed WANNA ONE member, shall we~? Kang Daniel-ssi, could you please call Ong Seongwoo-ssi once again?”

 

“Okay.”

 

Daniel tapped the green button and immediately put the phone into loudspeaker mode. He put hisphone’s speaker near the show’s microphone. Seconds later, the call was immediately connected. “Ong Seongwoo-ssi?” The DJ greeted as soon as the calling tone was ended. “I’m DJ Song from UrbanBuzz FM.”

 

“Ah, nice to meet you DJ Song-sii. Dear viewers, _anyeong~_ ”

 

“We’re calling you because you’re the last person that Kang Daniel-ssi called.”

 

“Ah yes, yesterday he called me and we were talking for a while,” Seongwoo lied, but only Daniel smlied as he knew the truth—the DJ didn’t find anything strange as he asked, “What did you guys talk about if I may know—?”

 

“About the cameo.”

 

“Oh, the cameo! Ong Seongwoo-ssi, if I may say—your drama is really good. My wife followed the episodes religiously. She really love your portrayal as Tae Woo. She also said that she preferred to have Hae In choose Tae Woo.”

 

“Thank you,” Seongwoo laughed, “So she’s Team Tae Woo, then?”

 

“That’s right,” The DJ was really excited, “That’s why we’re really curious about Kang Daniel-ssi cameo later. We hope it would be a nice role.”

 

“Thanks,” Both of Daniel and Seongwoo replied, almost in unison. The DJ was amused, “You two really synced with each other—still close as ever even after WANNA ONE’s disbandment. Kang Daniel-ssi stated earlier that you’re the member he missed the most, that’s why he visited you so often. Funny enough, he got a cameo offer because of it…!”

 

Then, after a laugh, “I wonder if he was also the member you missed the most from WANNA ONE, Ong Seongwoo-ssi?”

 

“Mmmm,” Seongwoo made a ponder tone, “Actually, he is.”

 

“Really?!”

 

“Don’t be so surprised like that,” Seongwoo chuckled, “I mean, even before WANNA ONE—we got close during Produce 101, right? Our humour matches. I mean, he laughed to every joke I made… I’m so grateful for him because of it…! But of course, I’m also grateful for other things as well. He was younger than me but he helped me a lot. We were roommates for a quite long period of time, and it was fun to do things together. I love all of our WANNA ONE’s members without no doubt, but if I need to choose one to hang out all day… I would probably choose Niel. We could take a drive, maybe to Busan? Enjoying the scenery, trying new places to eat, listening musics as we hit the road.”

 

“Ah, you did these before during WANNA ONE Go season 1 right?”

 

“Correct, though we visited Gapyeong instead. Busan would be a longer journey, so we opted for a closer place.”

 

“Being roommates for so long, do you know Daniel bad habits then, Ong Seongwoo-ssi?” The DJ playfully asked, and Daniel made a panicked face though he was burst into laughter as he clapped his hands. 

 

“Mmm… bad habits… Well…”

 

“Well?”

 

“He always wake up in the last minute before we went for a schedule. Is that count? But both of us was guilty of this—Jisung Hyung often nagged us about this matter, he often woke us up repeatedly. If he didn’t, we would be overslept. Jisung Hyuuunnggg, if you’re listening… I’m so sorry! Thanks for always woke us up…!”

 

“And uh—actually,” Daniel confessed, “A lot of people knew about it already, but I’m so noisy when I sleep. They said I snore quite loud, gritted my teeth and talked a lot as well.”

 

“Omo…!” The DJ shook his head, “How do you feel about these bad habits, Ong Seongwoo-ssi?”

 

“Well, I got used to it. He didn’t always snore—and sometimes he used teeth protector as well. That way he wouldn’t gritted his teeth and it prevented him to speak during his sleep.”

 

“So you got no problem with his bad sleeping habits then?”

 

“Yeah, not really.”

 

“You and Kang Daniel-ssi was so close, fans often nicknamed you guys ‘Science’ or ‘Dumb and Dumber duo’ so you two really clicked from the first meeting, then?”

 

Seongwoo laughed, “I’ve told this before during a show, but during our first meeting I was too nervous. It wasn’t that he was scary, but he sure was rather dominating—the whole MMO squad was wearing denim materials. Niel wearing one that was sleeveless on one side, imitating Jackson-sunbaenim from GOT7 since they were performing Hard Carry that day. His hair was pink, and his built was tall and big—I remembered that I thought ‘Oh, his shoulder is so wide…!’ I got so intimidated back then.”

 

“Ah—the staff just informed me that we need to go for another ads. Okay, before we ended the call… Ong Seongwoo-ssi, do you have any song’s recommendation that we should play?”

 

“Let’s see—I listened for the cover version before, so I didn’t think the song would be publicly available… but the original singer is One Direction, I believe? The song’s title is They Don’t Know About Us.”

 

“Okay, we’ll make sure to find and play the song for you and the viewers then,” The DJ cheerfully said, “Thank you so much for your time, Ong Seongwoo-ssi! It’s great to have you here with us.”

 

“You’re welcome…!”

 

Then the call was ended. The DJ spoke to the microphone, “We’ll be back guys, so stay tuned! We’ll play They Don’t Know About Us that recommended by Ong Seongwoo-ssi after the ads break. Have you heard it before, Kang Daniel-ssi?”

 

“Ah, I have. Seongwoo Hyung played the song before when he drove me before. We listened to the cover version though.”

 

“So it’s the first time you’ll hear the original version with us, then?”

 

“It seemed so,” Daniel laughed, “I’m looking forward for it.”

 

“Okay, we’ll talk more after the break then.”

 

His phone was buzzed during the breaktime, and Daniel took a quick glance: WANNA ONE members were chatting non-stop on the group chat.

 

 

**CloudFairy:** Look at these stupid couple

**CloudFairy:** So much PDA

**CloudFairy:** The aura is surely pink, huh

 

**ManduCheeks:** In Chinese slang idioms, they are feeding us dog foods to us singletons

**ManduCheeks:** Am I using the correct term, **@GulliverMaknae**?

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Oh, you’re correct **@ManduCheeks** Hyung

 

**Eomma:** “Who is the WANNA ONE member you miss the most?”

**Eomma:** “To be honest the answer is Seongwoo Hyung.”

**Eomma:** How about this eomma who raises you, Niel?

**Eomma:** Shame on you

**Eomma:** Disown!

 

**Sparrow:** Jisung Hyung, YOU ARE LIVING WITH DANIEL HYUNG LOLLLLZZZZZ

**Sparrow:** Remember?

**Sparrow:** [laugh emoticon]

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Jisung Hyung, you meet Niel Hyung everyday though

**CutiePieDaehwi:** [laugh emoticon]

 

**Eomma:** I’m not done!

**Eomma:** Seongwoo-ya **@BlackCat** “Thank you for always waking us up” 

**Eomma:** But the member you miss the most is still this stupid son of mine?

**Eomma:** What kind of son-in-law are you ah

 

**GulliverMaknae:** I think it was cool that Niel Hyung missed Seongwoo Hyung so much and vice versa

 

**BlackCat:** Linlin, you are a really good kid!

**BlackCat:** [thumbs up emoticon]

**BlackCat:** Here let Hyung hug you

**BlackCat:** Aigoo what a good kid

 

**DarkBae:** Guanlin really love OngNiel

**DarkBae:** As usual

**DarkBae:** And Jisung Hyung **@Eomma** most won’t pick their mother-in-law as their fave

 

**NamjaJihoon:** That’s… S A V A G E

 

**HwangEmperor:** Ah, let them be

**HwangEmperor:** They being lovey dovey is better than they involved into a fight like before

 

**NamjaJihoon:** True dat!

**NamjaJihoon:** It’s better like this, being sickeningly sweet lovey-dovey couple

 

**ManduCheeks:** Oh but still—

**ManduCheeks:** Ong Seongwoo, that’s a bold move of you to pick that song

 

**Nielie:** Eh, why?

 

**BlackCat:** [shy emoticon]

 

**ManduCheeks:** Listen to the lyrics, duh

 

**CloudFairy:** Too much PDA, guyssss

**CloudFairy:** Too much PDA

**CloudFairy:** Seriously

**CloudFairy:** Spare us the singletonsssss

 

 

As it was on cue, the ads ended and the song was played.

The intro was series of piano tunes, sounded so melancholic. Then the lyrics came and when Daniel listened to them carefully, he picked up those meaningful lyrics he missed when he listened to the song absent-mindedly before.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _People say we shouldn't be together_

_We're too young to know about forever_

_But I say they don't know what they're talk-talk-talkin' about_

_'Cause this love is only getting stronger_

_So I don't wanna wait any longer_

_I just wanna tell the world that you're mine ♪_ ♫♬

 

_Ah_ , was the first word hit his mind when he found that eureka moment. 

Suddenly he felt so moved. He felt so overwhelmed. He couldn’t stop grinning—and as he was familiar with the chorus, he sang softly; sang along with the song.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _They don't know about the things we do_

_They don't know about the "I love yous"_

_But I bet you if they only knew_

_They would just be jealous of us_

_They don't know about the up all night_

_They don't know I've waited all my life_

_Just to find a love that feels this right_

_Baby, they don't know about,_

_they don't know about us ♪_ ♫♬

 

* * *

 

The rest of the interview rolled rather smoothly. 

DJ Song asked him the questions that he prepared before, with no more sudden or surprise questions. Daniel played along with the cheerful atmosphere and answered all the questions without any hitch. He even promoted Jisung’s upcoming musical, reminding everyone to looking forward to it.

 

“Okay… Unfortunately our time was up, fellas.” The DJ made a regretful tone. “We’ll need to say goodbye to Kang Daniel-ssi. Thanks for participating to our show, please do visit us again in the future.”

 

“Sure, that would be my pleasure.”

 

* * *

 

**@prettysmole**

I SCREAMED OMG DJ SONG I LOVE YOU

[sceam.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@ongnielnoona** replied to **@prettysmole**

IKR OMG HE’S LIKE, SHIPPING ONGNIEL OR STH

HE’S KEEP ASKING ABOUT ONGNIEL 

[swoon.gif]

**via twitter**

**  
**  
**@dafdaf**

“Who is WANNA ONE member you miss the most?”

“To be honest the answer is Seongwoo Hyung.”

[excited.gif]

||

“I wonder if he was also the member you missed the most from WANNA ONE, Ong Seongwoo-ssi?”

“Actually, he is.”

[excited.gif]

**||**

MY KOKORO I CANNOT—

[pukerainbow.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@lovestruly** replied to **@dafdaf**

I SCREAMED I CANNOT—

AND DON’T FORGET THAT BLACK CAT REFERENCE

**via twitter**

 

**@busanincheon** replied to **@dafdaf** and **@lovestruly**

Before in a magazine interview, Ong said that someone nicknamed him the black cat since he resembled one right??? 

**via twitter**

 

**@lovely+athena** replied to **@busanincheon**

This one, right?

> **_If you could be any animal in the world, what animal would you be and why?_ **
> 
> _It’s a tough question. You guys sure knew that I once stated ‘seals’ and ‘squirrel’ for the answers,_
> 
> _thus I got a battalion of seal plushies with my moles on their cheeks,_
> 
> _but someone said that I really resembled a black cat._

**via twitter**

 

**@ageha**

“Who is WANNA ONE member you miss the most?”

“To be honest the answer is Seongwoo Hyung.”

“I wonder if he was also the member you missed the most from WANNA ONE, Ong Seongwoo-ssi?”

“Actually, he is.”

—  
My mood right now:

[hyperfangirling.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@ongNiel_is_science10969**

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE RECOMMENDATION SONG

IS DIS A CODE OR A CONFESSION OMG 

> _They don't know about the things we do_
> 
> _They don't know about the "I love yous"_
> 
> _But I bet you if they only knew_
> 
> _They would just be jealous of us_
> 
> _They don't know about the up all night_
> 
> _They don't know I've waited all my life_
> 
> _Just to find a love that feels this right_
> 
> _Baby, they don't know about,_
> 
> _they don't know about us_

**via twitter**

 

**@ramenrulz8p**

God blessed us with so much OngNiel PDA during UrbanBuzz FM interview:

\- Daniel miss Seongwoo the most  
\- Dat’s why he keep meeting him  
\- It’s vice versa with Ong, he miss Niel the most  
\- Ong didn’t mind Niel’s bad sleeping habits  
\- He want to go for a drive to Busan with Niel  
\- THE RECOMMENDATION SONG

I’m in heaven!!!

[excitedfangirl.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@crusty_chihuahua**

Now I really excited for that cameo role OMG

[hyperfangirl.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@wannalight**

I opened my twitter and this OngNiel moment made my day!!

OMG we’re so thirsty for their interaction 

[yaaayy.gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@beautifulstars**

WE NEED MOAR ONGNIEL!!

[nowkissmeme.jpeg]

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

**BONUS**

****

_["Mr. Kang"](https://twitter.com/mizuno_hikaru/status/1069811010406510592) _

 

* * *

 

_**EXTRA BONUS** _

_**Happy Birthday, Daniel~~!!** _

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the link for the 1D version [[here]](https://open.spotify.com/track/72C7aUQECOhNtnD0AC36ua?si=sFVVsGXTREm08-784Vq-NA) and the cover version [[here]](https://open.spotify.com/track/1H0zzuTwLcgV0cp9P7oNy9?si=4Z5wg8nVS82qdwTVHmp-nQ)
> 
> See you guys again next week~~!
> 
> =====  
> Btw just in case you haven't checked them out, I participated in these events:  
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> It's an OngNiel's fic fest. They would start posting the fics anonymously starting from 19th of Nov (WANNA ONE Comeback date, fellas?) so please check them out~! The postings will be publicized around 9PM KST everyday. Can you guess which one is my oneshot? LOLZ~ **HINT: MINE HAD BEEN UPLOADED.** Some of you guys had commented as well :)) 
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	24. My Character Seemed So In Love With Yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You are reading those fanmade stories of you and Seongwoo again, aren’t you?”
> 
> Daniel just smiled sheepishly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morning lovelies~!  
> How's your last weekend, do you guys have a good time?
> 
> There so much OngNiel lately I'm so happy LOLZ

* * *

**Missing You Dearly** by **PeachPink89**

Wanna One (Band)

**No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Yoon Jisung, Hwang Minhyun, WANNA ONE ensemble, Angst, Fluff, Angst with Happy Ending, Canon AU, OngNiel is Science, Oneshot, OngNiel, Longing, Mutual Pining

 

It was one of these nights when he sit beside his window, looking outside to Seoul’s cityscape—thinking about his lover. _What are you doing at the moment? Are you thinking about me? I’m missing you so much._

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 3,429 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

—

**Trip To Gapyeong** by **Stardust1996**

Wanna One (Band)

**Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, OngNiel is Science, Fluff, Comedy, Roadtrip, Canon AU, Eventually Smut, Unbetaed

 

_It’s been a while_ , he said, _Let’s go for a drive to Gapyeong._

So there they went for a two day and one night trip.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 5,720 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

—

**They Don’t Know About Us** by **TrueScientist**

Wanna One (Band)

**No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, WANNA ONE ensemble, Angst, Fluff, Hurt and Comfort, Angst with Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Longing, Mutual Pining, Smut, I miss them so much, OngNiel is Science, Unbetaed, English isn’t my 1st language

 

After the disbandment of WANNA ONE, Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo found it difficult to be suddenly separated. The two lovers struggle to balance their personal time during hectic schedules. Even so, they refused to let circumstances drifted them apart.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 8,945 **Chapters:** 2/?

 

—

**Hello, It’s Me** by **Stardust1996**

Wanna One (Band)

**Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Fluff, Angst, Oneshot, Phone Sex, Smut, Mature, PWPish, Established Relationship, Mutual Pining, OngNiel is Science

 

It’s been a while since the last time they met face to face. OngNiel need to make do.

Or in briefer summary: When the phone call turned into something not so innocent.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 4,110 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

—

**When You Are 18** by **PeachMoyed96**

Wanna One (Band)

**Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Fluff, Oneshot, Slice of Life AU, High School AU, OngNiel is Science

 

They used to be best friend before Daniel moved to another town. He promised that he will come back to find 18 years old Seongwoo. Years trickled down and on the day of his 18th birthday, Ong Seongwoo found a guy holding a bouquet of roses on his doorstep.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 5,620 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

* * *

 

“What are you reading—?”

 

Daniel raised his eyes from his laptop. “Stories…?” He answered rather vaguely. After he figured out the password of the locked folder in his phone before, he had tried another series of password to his laptop. It wasn’t a surprise when he entered Seongwoo’s birthday and he was logged in right away. It was a gaming laptop with many games installed, but he still got his personal files there. It was mostly photos, stored from his phone into the cloud system—along with the other pictures and photos he saved from the internet, taken by the fans.

 

There was also some bookmarks on his browser: he checked it and found out that he had bookmarked several websites that posted fanfictions between him and Seongwoo. Some of them were international websites and the whole content was written in English—but he was able to read them since he got his basics in English, after all he used to prepare to move to Canada with his aunt’s family if he bombed his effort at Produce 101.

 

It was amusing that his fans were so creative, writing so many stories about them. He enjoyed the AU ones, marvelled at how fun and carefree the setting was—and sometimes got shocked by the canon ones since some of them did happened in real life and he wondered if the authors monitored them or got any information from an insider. 

 

The authors worked really fast—it was barely three days after the radio interview, and the fanfictions inspired by the session were posted already. He was so busy for those last three days: doing two magazine interviews and photograph sessions, practicing his choreography in between. It was easy to answer the magazine interviews after the radio interview: most of the question had been sent to him earlier so he could prepare his replies and most of the questions were the ones repeatedly asked so he just need to adjust his answers so he didn’t sounded like a recording tape mouthing the same thing over and over again—but in essence his answers were the same for those type of questions. 

 

Now that he finally finished his jobs rather early today, he checked his frequently visited sites and found the updates had been posted—some of them on the very same day of the radio interview while the ones with longer word count were posted a day or two after.

 

Jisung raised his left eyebrow as he recognized the website look. He didn’t need to read any words on the screen; the red and white layout gave it all. “You are reading those fanmade stories of you and Seongwoo again, aren’t you?”

 

Daniel just smiled sheepishly.

Then, he noticed the thick brown envelope on Jisung’s hand. “What is that…?” He pointed, and Jisung gave it to him, “The drama script. It was mailed this morning.”

 

The logo of the broadcast station was stamped on the upper corner edge of the envelope. Underneath was the drama’s logo followed big, bold words: SCRIPT. His name was written beneath the capital latin alphabets. The envelope was sealed with a paper tape on the back, so Daniel tore it open and pulled out the bind file.

 

It was rather thick for a cameo script—the usual cameo appeared briefly and didn’t have many scenes. The first page was the cover of the script: it only showed the drama logo, the screenwriter name, and the scene sequences number. On the second page, Daniel found about his role: they gave him a name. The surname was also Kang, and the character given name was Young Jin. They gave him a background story: Kang Young Jin was Kim Tae Woo’s hoobae during university, they used to be in the same club, and he also know about Hae In. He was particularly dislike her since he noticed that Hae In became Tae Woo’s girlfriend rather half-heartedly.

 

“Oh?” Jisung peeked through Daniel’s shoulder, “It seemed they did the new cameo approach.” There were cases of cameo that didn’t just ‘appear’ but assimilated into a story—they may showed up rather briefly but they held some significance to the story. This way their appearance didn’t feel like a mere filler. Some example of famous drama series used this approach were What’s Wrong With Secretary Kim and The Beauty Inside.

 

\--

**SCENE 58**

**INT. SEOUL, TAE WOO’S OFFICE—FOYER**

_The lift reach the floor and open with a loud DING._

_ZOOM IN to someone’s shoes step out of the lift, followed by others._

_CUT TO the details of his torso. The person fix his jacket suit._

_CUT TO the back view’s close up. The group of men walk to Tae Woo’s front office._

 

 

**SCENE 59**

**INT. SEOUL, TAE WOO’S OFFICE—FRONT DESK**

_The receptionist noticed them, ready to welcome the group when TAE WOO opened the door, holding some files. He notice the group, particularly one person in blonde._

 

**TAE WOO**

…Young Jin?

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** …HYUNG!

 

 

**SCENE 60**

**INT. CAFE, LONG TABLE**

_Tae Woo team were seated along with Young Jin team. They are eating and drinking merrily. The table are filled with beers, soju and BBQ and banchans._

 

**MIN SEONG**

Cheers!

 

_The other cheers and raised their glass, some clink their glass to the other’s glass. YOUNG JIN sip his soju as he stare at TAE WOO. TAE WOO notice and stare back, before he everted his eyes and pretend to laugh with the person next to him.YOUNG JIN smile and stand up, sit near TAE WOO and fill his half-emptied glass._

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** It’s been a while. I couldn’t believe that we met again today, Hyung.

 

**TAE WOO**

…yeah. It’s been a while.

\--

 

Reading the script, Daniel felt that something was kinda amiss. Sure it was a proper script, but there was a particular feeling that emerged as he read the scenes: somehow it reminded him to one particular feeling when he read those fanfictions written by the CP fans.

 

On the several earlier scenes, while Tae Woo was still gloomy and distant from his messy relationship with Hae In, Young Jin was rather cheerful and acted rather… sticky? His action description keep hinting that he initiated a lot of skinship with Tae Woo. On one point, there were even flashback scenes when they were in college years ago—Young Jin seemed focused most of his attention to Tae Woo, using many excuses including club activities to get close with his sunbae. He acted rather cold and showed his dislike to Hae In in such clear manner, almost hostile, since once he witnessed Hae In talked ill about Tae Woo when her peers teased her about her ‘devoted boyfriend’—at the moment she hadn’t accepted Tae Woo as boyfriend yet.

 

Sure, the writer tried her best to explained the situation with painting that Young Jin was a good hoobae that held a high regards of respect to Tae Woo due ‘bro code’ reasoning, but it felt off nevertheless. _Is this Young Jin secretly gay and in love with Tae Woo?_ would be the first thing popped in everyone’s minds, just like Daniel thought as he read the scripts. 

 

One scene even depicted a such classic troupe: Tae Woo saw Seo Jun and Hae In together in downtown. The two lovebirds acted close and intimate, though the plot explained that they were attending company gathering and the two of them drank quite a lot—Hae In was terribly drunk so Seo Jun carried her home. This scene would surely be viral; netizen would scold Hae In and Seo Jun for ‘being in affair’ and would especially despise Hae In as the current Seo Jun didn’t know that she was Tae Woo’s girlfriend. Of course, during this period of time it was rather unclear since Tae Woo seemed to dump her already, but they haven’t get a clean break yet.

 

\--

**SCENE 87**

**EXT. SEOUL, ROAD NEAR THE CAFE**

_TAE WOO’s body went rigid as he saw SEO JUN and HAE IN together in the distance. HAE IN was drunk and leaned onto SEO JUN. SEO JUN coax her and grab her waist, try to get a taxi, completely unaware that TAE WOO see the two of them. YOUNG JIN stand in front of TAE WOO, obstructing his view and quickly covering TAE WOO eyes._

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** Don’t see…!

 

**TAE WOO**

I—

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** Please forget about her, Hyung. She didn’t worth your love and attention.

 

**TAE WOO**

I used to love her so much…

\--

 

“Wait, Young Jin hugged him…?” Daniel’s eyes widened as he read the next scene. His character was pulling Tae Woo into an embrace as the older male seemed to cry—the writer depicted the scene as ‘Tae Woo’s shoulder trembled as he let the younger male to tightened his embrace.’ The writer really use such a strong and intimate word: _embrace_. This particular scene really amplified his suspicion from before: _Writer-nim, are you sure this Young Jin really wasn’t gay? Do you really sure that he didn’t in love with Tae Woo? Their scenes really giving off those feelings written during romance scenes of two person in love, you know?_

 

He didn’t really mind the scenes—in fact he was rather amused. Troupe cliche-wise, being the second male lead would surely guaranteed that Tae Woo won’t ended up winning Hae In, the female lead from Seo Jun’s hands, since he was the male lead. However, the viewers seemed prefer Tae Woo over Seo Jun. Some media criticized Seo Jun’s actor as they felt that his acting lacked charm and Seo Jun’s character felt flat in comparison with Tae Woo, that got more depth and character development. 

 

Despite being the second male lead, Tae Woo stole the viewers’s hearts as he was so dedicated to Hae In, but his beloved didn’t return his feelings in the same way. This caused the critics to butchered their reviews, stating that the drama series lacked core strength and messy plot, even annoying male and female lead—despite having a constant high rating and constantly being hot topics. They still gave kudos to the actors and actresses’s acting though—most of them were veterans and their acting was solid despite the rather messy plot and one dimensional characters. 

 

Now, despite being a cameo, Young Jin came suddenly into the plot—his character tied with Tae Woo in a really interesting way. Sure, Daniel repeated that he want a role that interact a lot with Seongwoo’s character, but he never imagined the scenes would be so… intimate. He didn’t know if he need to cry or laugh—but one thing he was really sure: after the scenes aired there would be so many fanarts and fanfictions about Young Jin and Tae Woo for sure.

 

He took his phone and quickly texted the other male.

 

_Seongwoo-ya_

_Have you seen the script?_

**_Daniel. 10:26 PM._ **

 

_Not yet_

_Why?_

**_Seongwoo. 10:26 PM._ **

 

_I think you might wanna check the scenes first_

**_Daniel. 10:27 PM._ **

 

_Okay_

_Gimme a sec_

**_Seongwoo. 10:27 PM._ **

 

_WAIT_

_WAIT WAIT WAIT_

_W A I T_

**_Seongwoo. 10:29 PM._ **

 

_I see that you’ve read it by now_

**_Daniel. 10:30 PM._ **

 

_WAIT_

_I need a moment_

_The scenes between Young Jin and Tae Woo_

_are way too…_

**_Seongwoo. 10:30 PM._ **

 

_Lovey dovey?_

_Ambiguous?_

_‘No Homo, Bro’?_

**_Daniel. 10:31 PM._ **

 

_Too bromance?_

_Wait_

_I don’t think it was considered bromance_

**_Seongwoo. 10:31 PM._ **

 

_It’s more like our fans’s fanfictions, really_

**_Daniel. 10:32 PM._ **

 

_What_

**_Seongwoo. 10:32 PM._ **

 

_Fanfictions, Seongwoo-ya_

_You know, stories written by our fans_

_About us_

_Not only canon, but also so many AU_

**_Daniel. 10:32 PM._ **

 

_What are you talking about_

_Seriously what kind of terms are those?_

**_Seongwoo. 10:32 PM._ **

 

_….do you want to google them?_

**_Daniel. 10:33 PM._ **

 

_Gimme a sec_

**_Seongwoo. 10:33 PM._ **

 

_WAIT_

_W A I T_

_This—_

**_Seongwoo. 10:35 PM._ **

 

_I see that you’ve learn it by now_

**_Daniel. 10:35 PM._ **

 

_Let me call the writer_

**_Seongwoo. 10:35 PM._ **

 

_Aww, why?_

_I’m not bothered by the script tho_

_My character seemed so in love with yours_

_It would be great if Tae Woo would return his feelings, you know?_

**_Daniel. 10:36 PM._ **

 

_Not funny Niel_

_What if this caused a scandal_

**_Seongwoo. 10:36 PM._ **

 

_It won’t_

_It was the official script, remember?_

_No offence to our relationship, but if you’re so worried_

_We just could… presented it like a joke or sth_

_Pretending like ‘OMG our characters interact like these—‘_

_After all I’m only a cameo_

_I won’t showed up that much on the drama_

_So they used my character as a filler for comedic purpose?_

**_Daniel. 10:37 PM._ **

 

_I doubt it would serve as comedic purpose_

_The scenes were way too dramatic_

**_Seongwoo. 10:37 PM._ **

 

_So when we could meet up?_

_To practice the lines and the scenes_

_I need to make it perfect ;)_

**_Daniel. 10:37 PM._ **

 

_You are enjoying this, aren’t you?_

**_Seongwoo. 10:38 PM._ **

 

_I am ;)_

**_Daniel. 10:38 PM._ **

 

_/sigh_

**_Seongwoo. 10:38 PM._ **

 

_You love me, I knew it :))_

**_Daniel. 10:39 PM._ **

 

_Fine_

_Tell Hyunsik Hyung to contact Jihyo Noona_

_We could arrange an official schedule for practicing the scenes_

**_Seongwoo. 10:40 PM._ **

 

_Okay :D_

**_Daniel. 10:40 PM._ **

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone excited for the cameo? LOLZ  
> This chapter is kinda short, I need to cut the scene for the next chapter /run away/
> 
> =====  
> Btw just in case you haven't checked them out, I participated in these events:  
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> Have you guessed? LOLZ I got several people guessed me right at twitter. I wrote DAY 1 ["Forever & A Day"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16659853)
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	25. Give Him to Me Then

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Give him to me then.  
> If you acted like this and didn’t love him, just give him to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning, lovelies~!!
> 
> Happy Holiday and Merry Christmas~!!  
> It's Christmas Eve when I posted this chapter :)  
> I hope you guys will have a great day during these holiday season ^^b

* * *

 

_He was walking on a sidewalk. It was quite dark and the yellowish hue from the street light was barely lit the area. It dimly radiated the area beneath its pole, but not much for the rest of the surroundings. The air tasted crisp, late spring night still blowing cold breeze that caressed his skin._

 

_Despite it, he didn’t bothered by the weather. He felt giddy, jogged his way as he shoved his hands inside his pocket. The sole of his shoes hit the asphalt swiftly, producing soft echoing_ tap tap tap _everytime he took a step forward._

 

_The stars were bright, scattered on the dark and deep navy sky, twinkled against the crescent moon. He was staring at those stars, tried to figure some constellation—he remembered those three moles on the older male’s cheeks. Those moles created a small triangle, and he was reminded to the famous summer’s constellation instantly._

 

_He jogged faster and took a turn to the left. Someone was standing beneath the street light—looking downwards as he was absentmindedly checking his phone. He was wearing black on black outfit—it looked really good on him. The golden hue casted a soft halo on his raven coloured hair, painting shadows on his sharp and chiseled features. Daniel held his breath—Seongwoo seemed like a masterpiece carved from the pure marble by the famous Michaelangelo himself._

 

_The older male seemed to notice his arrival, shoved the phone to his pocket and raised his face; he was smiling as he waved at Daniel. Those dark orbs gleamed as the corner of his lips curled upwards._

 

_“Niel-ah…!”_

 

* * *

 

“Niel-ah.”

 

Daniel opened his eyes and blinked in confusion. His eyes felt heavy. He rubbed his eyes, then scratched his cow-licked messy hair. Slowly, he threw his blanket aside. Jisung was still standing next to his bed, “Wake up.”

 

Still disoriented, Daniel yawned and scratched his stomach. He blinked again and tried his best to focus his sight on Jisung. The older male was already prim and proper, looked neat with his casual chic outfit—the comparison with barely wake up Daniel was like day and night. “Youngsik Hyung called me,” Jisung shook his head like he always does whenever his ‘mother’ mode was activated, “He tried to call you so many times but you won’t pick up.”

 

Hearing those, Daniel’s eyes popped up and he scrambled to find his phone. It was dead—the baterry had long given out so his alarm didn’t ring to wake him up. He wanted to facepalm himself due his carelessness, but Jisung nudged him, “Quickly take your shower.”

 

Daniel did as he was told, dashed to the bathroom and cursed when he turned the water—cold water splashed onto his body and made him shivered. Thanks God it was still summer so the cold water won’t hurt him. He darted out from the bathroom just wearing his big towel, and found that Jisung had laid his outfit for the day on his neatly tucked and pristine bed.

 

“Thanks Hyung…!” Daniel yelled, took his beanie and shoved his messy hair underneath since he didn’t have time to properly dry and styled it. He didn’t bother to put any make-up, there would be professional make up artist later to dolled him up before his shoot. Jisung only tsk-ed and made the infamous eyeroll, “You still haven’t change after all these years ah. You and Seongwoo always so hard to woke up, always waiting for the last minute to rush.”

 

Daniel smiled apologetically. “Sorry,” He said, took his backpack in a rush and followed Jisung to the lift. Youngsik had been waiting for them downstairs, on the usual parking lot. It was a peaceful trip since no one use the elevator, and with a loud crisp _ding_ they reached the parking area.

 

“Sorry, Youngsik Hyung…!” Daniel climbed into the van. The manager only raised one of his eyebrows, and handed him and Jisung their breakfast. It was some tuna and egg sandwich—two paper cups of steaming coffee had been placed on the bolster near their seats. 

 

As he was eating his breakfast, Daniel made a mental note of their schedule today: They would drop Jisung at the musical practice room, took Daniel to another photoshoot for a magazine cover, then at two they would finally drop him at Seongwoo’s drama set. There Jihyo Noona would either picked them to another place or they could use any practice room on the set—the drama practices with Seongwoo had been labelled as official practice anyway.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _The wind blows and whispers_

_The reason why the birds up on the sky_

_fly towards me and sing is you_

_It’s guiding me_

_That my only answer is you_

_Taking me to you_

_Taking me to you, to you... ♪_ ♫♬

 

The song played by the radio made Daniel smile. He chomped down on his sandwich, took his coffee and ended his breakfast with a _“haaaah—“_ satisfied sigh. Outside, the sky was bright and blue. The sun was shining brightly, too bright even—since they got another heat warning from the goverment. Yet it was still beautiful. It was peaceful. Daniel stared at the scenes passing by his window and smiled again as he remembered that he could meet Seongwoo again this afternoon.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _Taking me to you_

_Taking me taking me_

_The wind blows past the horizon and whispers_

_The only reason in this world is just one, it’s you... ♪_ ♫♬

 

* * *

 

“Good afternoon…!”

 

Seongwoo’s drama set location was the same studio space with the one he visited several times earlier. The indoor set was constructed from wood and board, then decorated with furnitures like an actual decor of a house. They used real locations for outdoor shoot, but the real place got restricted spaces for camera movements, so they filmed on the studio whenever they need an indoor scene. Not all of the indoor scene was taken on the studio though—some places were shoot at real locations, the one they didn’t need to customize the layout like cafes, stalls, streets, common meeting room, etc.

 

Daniel was kinda familiar with some of the crews—he visited before and interacted quite a bit with the staffs. Don’t underestimate the small staffs—eventhough it’s good to have big, important people as your acquaintances, small staffs were the one doing all errands during the set. Not mentioning costumes, hair do and make up because they got a special crew for that; things like chairs, food, drinks, and other small matters were mostly monitored by these staffs. 

 

It seemed petty and not much, but have their support means you’ll get better treatment on set. Being a natural nice guy, Daniel had took their heart and affections since he was so funny and friendly with everyone—the staffs greeted him warmly and escorted him to Seongwoo’s waiting room without much fuss. They immediately prepared him a new folded chair, offered him some snacks provided on the set, and asked if he got anything he wish to order for a drink.

 

“Ah, mineral water is fine,” Daniel smiled, those rows of white teeth showed up—dazzled the noona staff’s eyes, “I didn’t want to give you extra work to do, Noona.”

The girl almost swooned immediately. She blushed as she stammered, “Ah, it’s okay…! It’s nothing much…!” Then she prepared a bottle of mineral water along with another bottle of juice. She almost hopping when she took her way out; the flutters in her heart and stomach was too much to bear.

 

Daniel was still wearing his make up and hair do from the previous magazine photoshoot. While he had changed the photoshoot’s outfit with his own—the slightly messy combed back hairstyle showed a bit of his forehead and combined with the immaculate accents on his eyes and jaws, he excluded a really sexy and seducing vibe. The outfit Jisung had selected for him this morning was a black, slightly oversized buttoned shirt that got some white abstract doodle and English words scribbled across the torso area. _Sexy, Young and Dangerous_ it written, truly suited for his current appearance. He tucked half the front section of the shirt into his dark denim, emphasized his extremely long legs.

 

Seongwoo saw the interactions from inside the room. He felt a little jealous—he wanted to yell _Hey, he’s mine!_ but the staff’s reaction was so amusing he couldn’t help to chuckle. Daniel, whom stood near the entrance of the waiting room, noticed the burst of chuckle and leaned onto the doorframe as he slightly folded his arms.

 

“Why are you laughing?” He asked, tone was rather languid, teasing. Then, he took several steps forward and approaching Seongwoo. Daniel leaned down and placed both of his hand the armrest of Seongwoo’s chair, entrapped the older male in almost a kabedon style.

 

“Because you are silly,” Seongwoo evaded the question and gave a light smack to Daniel’s arm. “Come, get your chair and your script quick.” Daniel looked like he wanted to tease him more, and Seongwoo gave him another smack, “There are people, you horny rascal. Get. Your. Chair. Now.”

 

Daniel pouted, but he relented—dragged the chair and took out his script. His was no comparison with Seongwoo’s—Seongwoo’s script was far thicker than his, since Daniel’s script was intended for a cameo role and Seongwoo was the second male lead. There were lots of scribbles and marks on Seongwoo’s—he made notes on his script while learning them.

 

“Let’s start with the first scene.”

 

That one is simple—after all the first scene of Young Jin was he visited Tae Woo’s office and called him after recognizing him. It’s simple alright, but not as easy as it seemed. There were many kinds of expression Young Jin could show: particularly because of their latter scenes, Seongwoo thought that this Young Jin would’t merely show a face of an enthusiastic hoobae or someone who met their long lost friend. A difference in the character’s train of minds would affect their gestures and manner after all. 

 

 

**SCENE 59**

**INT. SEOUL, TAE WOO’S OFFICE—FRONT DESK**

_The receptionist noticed them, ready to welcome the group when TAE WOO opened the door, holding some files. He notice the group, particularly one person in blonde._

 

**TAE WOO**

…Young Jin?

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** …HYUNG!

 

 

Their first scene only got a one line, simple dialogue. But they would need to emphasize to their face expression and gestures. Seongwoo wanted to see how Daniel interpreted Young Jin’s character, so he didn’t give his pointer yet. For Tae Woo though, it was much simpler: he was in love with Hae In so many years and obviously just genuinely surprised to see a familiar face. He was entangled with Hae In and her family at the moment, but he wasn’t so heart broken as before.

 

Seongwoo made an absent-minded face, seemed like almost an ordinary salary man. He gestured a surprized face clouded with a doubt as he hesitated, “…Young Jin?” Daniel saw all of his mannerism and admired Seongwoo for it—he had witnessed Seongwoo acted before as he watched on the sidelines before. But seeing it up close first hand was still another experience for him.

 

Daniel was familiar with Seongwoo’s way to interpreted the character: before he had spent time to thought about his character. What kind of man this Young Hin is? What’s his feelings to Tae Woo? What kind of thoughts he keep all these years while they never met? He wasn’t as trained as Seongwoo—he never really got proper acting lesson either: he might did before, but he got no recollection of it. MMO wanted to find him an acting coach, but Seongwoo volunteered instead.

 

In the end, he tried to put himself on Young Jin shoes. He imagined that he deeply care and actually in love with his sunbae, but the latter never gave him a second look. The chance was never there. The said girlfriend of his beloved sunbae never really appreciated him—Young Jin caught her badmouthing Tae Woo and he resented Hae In for it.

 

_Give him to me then,_ he made a guess of what would be Young Jin thought during those scene, _If you acted like this and didn’t love him, just give him to me. I love him more—I would like to make him happy. I would like to cherish him and give him the best._

 

Daniel tried to immersed himself with the character and copied Tae Woo’s absentminded face. He tried to look stoic as well, but his eyes darted everywhere as he seemed to be interested with Tae Woo’s office layout and interior design. Seongwoo re-enacted the dialogue, “…Young Jin?”

 

In almost a split second, Daniel’s eyes darted to Seongwoo. Those eyes widened in an instant. He looked rather surprised, but he was really happy as his eyes crinkled into a charming smile. Daniel gestured a wave, his lips twitched and he seemed giddy as he called back. “…Hyung!”

 

Seongwoo saw Daniel’s acting and smiled. “That was perfect,” He praised the younger male. “Now let’s move to the next scene.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Daniel often jokes, but during practice like this he keep his manner and did his practice in the earnest. He need to learn and Seongwoo’s time was limited as he still got his scenes on the set. Of course, visiting the drama location got its own perks. He could learn pointers from seeing other actors acted. Everyone got their own style, but Seongwoo finished almost all of his part in one take. He rarely got NGs. If he got one, it was mostly another actor or actress that made a mistake.

 

They continued to acted out the scenes from their script, and sometimes Seongwoo corrected him. Following Seongwoo’s habit, Daniel wrote down the notes on his script. He lined the important cues and added his own interpretation for the dialogues.

 

“Seongwoo-ssi?”

 

Both of them raised their head to the staff stood by the door. “We need to shoot your scene,” The male staff informed him, and Seongwoo nodded, “I’ll be there. Thanks for informing me.”

 

Seongwoo gave his script to Daniel. “Wait for me for a while,” He smiled, and Daniel nodded. “I’ll be here, waiting for you… watching you—“

 

He didn’t finished his sentence. Seongwoo blushed and smacked his arm again. “Stop the sweet talks.”

 

Daniel grinned. “But you love it.”

 

“Shut up,”  Seongwoo blushed even harder, and Daniel just smiled—his heart feels warm, brimming with love and adoration.  


 

_I love you—no matter what._

_I would make sure to make you happy._

_I would cherish you and give you everything, all the best things in the worlds._

 

“Go, Tae Woo Hyung,” Daniel teased with a soft laugh, “Fighting…!”

 

So Seongwoo played along, “Shut up, Young Jin you brat.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone can guess this chapter's insert song?  
> I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> =====  
> Btw just in case you haven't checked them out, I participated in these events:  
> # [Gapyeong Lovers](https://twitter.com/gapyeonglovers)  
> Have you guessed? LOLZ I got several people guessed me right at twitter. I wrote DAY 1 ["Forever & A Day"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16659853)
> 
> # [W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	26. You are My Future, My Forever, My Everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Niel,” Seongwoo suddenly lifted up his gaze—their eyes locked onto each other, “Do you… ever resented that I insisted to stay at Fantagio and didn’t join you guys at MMO?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!  
> Sorry for not updating last week, but being the eve of new year I was really busy IRL--things got hectic since there were a lot of last minutes stuffs at work, followed by big family gathering on the eve till the morning of the new year. In a briefer summary: I need sleep at that day LOLZ
> 
> But hey I'm back today with the newest update, enjoy :))
> 
> And happy belated new year~! I hope the best for us and our boys--WANNA ONE may had been disbanded but I believe they were still close as ever (so many OngNiel moment at the last show event my kokoro went kyaaaaaaaa!!!) I really hope the best for their career at 2019 :D

* * *

 

When he wake up in the morning, the first thing he saw was Daniel’s face.

The younger male’s sleeping face was peaceful—those eyelids twitched a little; followed with a curve of a smile on his lips. Daniel mumbled something in his sleep, muttered something that sounded like a butchered version of Seongwoo’s name. His voice was low and husky. The smile went wider, then he was back to his original state, looking like a defenceless baby. 

 

Seongwoo didn’t know if he should laugh or cry. Daniel’s bad sleeping habit never changed at all. It was a good thing that he didn’t grind his poor teeth these times. Other people might complained, saying that Daniel’s snoring and random ramblings made them unable to sleep—but Seongwoo’s Dad was a heavy snorer and as their family usually sleep together in a big room, he had his fair share of listening to such noises and learned to ignored the noises when he was trying to sleep. 

 

Beside, look at Daniel’s face while he was sleeping like these—would you have a heart to scold him? Those eyebrows looked relaxed, his skin was milky white, his features looked soft despite his tall nose and v shaped chin. His lips was slightly opened, the lower lip tinted with a rosy hue. His breathing was steady—those warm breaths tickled Seongwoo’s skin.

 

A lock of his dyed blonde hair fell on his forehead, between those eyebrows. Seongwoo smiled, his heart felt tender as he reached out and swept the fallen locks aside. Thanks to the regular conditioning, Daniel’s hair still felt soft between his fingers. Sure, being repeatedly bleached and dyed and bathed in so many gel and hairspray due their daily schedules made it coarser; but having the best treatment for his hair helped Daniel’s hair a lot.

 

Carefully, he traced Daniel’s features using his fingertips. They younger felt warm under his touch. A moment later, those eyelashes fluttered and Daniel groggily opened his eyes. He blinked several times, yawned as he rubbed his eyes. Focusing his sight on Seongwoo’s face, Daniel smiled as he leaned in and gave a soft peck on Seongwoo’s lips.

 

“Morning, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

“Mmm…”

 

Daniel laughed, eyes crinkled and gleamed like gems. The morning’s sunshine fell through the curtains onto his figure, biased a golden halo on his hair. He nipped Seongwoo’s earlobe slowly, in a really seducing ways, then moved along to the sharp jaw and kneaded his lips wantonly along the lines. The soft and wet smacking noises soon filled the room with an ambiguous atmosphere.

 

A moan escaped Seongwoo’s lips, as he threw his head to the side—exposing his neckline to full view to Daniel, giving the younger male a better access in the same time. Daniel’s lips trailed down, he buried his nose on the crook of Seongwoo’s neck and inhaled; the latter smelled like bergamot and a hint of mahogany.

 

“We need to woke up,” Seongwoo said between his moans. Eventhough he really enjoyed their morning bed interactions, he knew that they need to rise and shine to prepare for the day. Both of them so a jam-packed schedule for sure.

 

“Mmm—“

 

“Come on,” Seongwoo’s lips curled into a smile, and Daniel relented, “Okay.”

 

It was later when Daniel slowly shifted himself into a sitting position and stepped out of the bed that suddenly alerted Seongwoo. They weren’t in his or Daniel’s room. The bed they were sleeping in was foreign and unfamiliar king sized one. The whole room seemed distant, though somewhat familiar: he didn’t recognized the ceiling and the furnitures, but he definitely saw their personal knick-knacks all over, scattered on different places—everywhere in the room.

 

“…where…” Seongwoo was dazed, “…are we?”

 

Daniel, who had been standing next to their bed, turned around and tilted his head. “Our dorm room…?” His tone was amused, as if Seongwoo asked something so obvious, like how much one plus one or two plus two. Seongwoo furrowed his eyebrows, “Our dorm room? But—?”

 

“Are you still half-asleep…?” Daniel chuckled and leaned down. Seongwoo barely registered when the younger put his arms around Seongwoo’s torso, just beneath his armpit, then proceed to pulled him out of the bed. Instinctively, Seongwoo yelped and secured his dangling feet around Daniel’s waist. Daniel let Seongwoo circled his hands around his neck and supported the older male’s rear using both hands. 

 

Seongwoo blushed due their intimate new position, especially when Daniel gave him a naughty smirk and kneaded his twin buns in slow, teasing manner. “Aish, you…!” Seongwoo smacked Daniel’s arm, and the younger laughed. “I couldn’t help it.”

 

Daniel maintained their position to the door—Seongwoo helped him opened the door knob. When they reached the living room, another strange unfamiliarity washed over Seongwoo. They were in somewhere he didn’t recognize—the interior felt like a mixture of MMO’s dorm and his own living room. He saw his belongings there, and rows of his seal dolls were lined up behind the giant glass cases mounted on the wall, framing the huge flatscreen LCD television screen.

 

“…where are we…?” He asked again, unsure. Something felt off, wrong. He didn’t know, but there was this restless feelings swirled inside his chest. Something screaming that he didn’t belong there and it made his heart filled with anxiety.

 

The younger male seemed amused with his question. “Seongwoo-ya,” He called Seongwoo’s name, tightened his craddle. He made a gesture signalled Seongwoo to focused at him, “It’s our dorm, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

“Our… dorm…?”

 

“Yeah,” Daniel nodded gently, “Our special MMO sub-company, remember?”

 

_MMO? But—_

 

“I’m from Fantagio,” Seongwoo was really confused. Something felt really wrong, but he didn’t know what. Or why. Daniel chuckled, “You used to be in Fantagio, but you quit and joined not long after WANNA ONE’s disbandment, remember?”

 

“Eh?”

 

“Are you still half-asleep, Seongwoo-ya?” Daniel laughed, but Seongwoo couldn’t do the same. He still got both of his hands on Daniel’s shoulder. The wide shoulder felt safe and warm, but there was a chill in Seongwoo’s heart. 

 

_I didn’t remember leaving Fantagio…_

 

“I convinced you to leave and joined me here,” Daniel finally placed Seongwoo on the sofa, then pecked both of the older male’s cheeks before he hugged the latter and made trails of peppering kisses on the latter’s neck and collarbone. “Fantagio was in a jeopardy before due the internal CEO problem. You were so distressed. I really hate to see you miserable like that. So I offered you to joined my sub company, remember?”

 

Daniel’s explanation sounded familiar, yet Seongwoo felt something amiss. He blinked slowly, “I think I… do remember… a scene of that—“

 

—

 

_It was a simple Americano. Iced, no added sugar nor additional milk. There were beads of condensations on the outer layer of the glass, slowly rolled down and created a round mark that surrounded the bottom rim of the mug. The ice cubes clinked against each other, created a sharp familiar sound when Seongwoo held the stainless steel straw and stirred his coffee._

 

_“Are you sure, Seongwoo-ya?”_

 

_On the other side of the table, Daniel’s latte was half empty already. They sat across of each other on the two seated table, secluded on the back area of the coffee shop. The bright neon sign glowed in startling pink, biased the bright hue to both of their bodies._

 

_Seongwoo gave Daniel a smile, then he shrugged. “Yeah,” He said, “I’ve decided, Niel-ah.”_

 

_His dark orbs looked bright and unwavering. Daniel stared at him with a knowing gaze: eyebrows furrowed, a smile that not a smile showed up on his face. “I see,” He answering, tone almost flat. He had suspected Seongwoo’s decision._

 

_“Are you sure…?” Still, he asked again—and Seongwoo nodded firmly._

 

_—_

 

Seongwoo stared at Daniel, eyes widened. “Niel-ah,” He finally said after a long silence, “This isn’t the real world, is it?”

 

Daniel was taken aback by his question. “Eh?” The younger’s expression fell, “What do you mean, Seongwoo-ya—?”

 

It was another silence, but then Seongwoo opened his mouth and continued his sentences: “Because I never left Fantagio. I declined your offer back then.”

 

—

 

_“Are you sure?”_

 

_Seongwoo nodded firmly, “I’ll stay. I still got several years on my contract. And I… want to pursue acting. I’ll be an actor for a mean while.”_

 

_Fantagio is actually not an idol company. They heavily focused on actors and actresses. Sure they got ASTRO, WekiMeki and several new groups—but Fantagio was mainly a company of actors. When Seongwoo entered, he was trained to be actor as well—though he learned singing and dancing on his own on the side. He learned how to do popping, but as everyone knew from Produce 101 season 2 back then, he wasn’t really mastered the basics of dancing—he got difficulties to learn the choreography in such a short time._

 

_He got an actor face, everyone said. And Fantagio was indeed intended to groom him as an actor in the beginning. He got enough basics from his acting classes, and right before his contract with WANNA ONE was ended, he got a male lead offer on a school drama along with a veteran actress, the one who started her career as a child actress, Kim Hyang Gi._

 

_Music was one of his passion, and there were cases of those idol-actors like both Jinyoung from B1A4 and GOT7—but Fantagio circumstances wasn’t ideal for his idol career for the time being. The dispute was still roaring, and Seongwoo decided to take a more stable route as an actor as his company still provided many resources for him in acting matter._

 

_“Okay,” Daniel knew that it was no use for him to argue or do further convincing—Seongwoo had made his decision and won’t change his mind. “But you—we… we could… sing and perform together again in the future, right?”_

 

_It was possible—collaboration was a common thing between singers, it doesn’t matter if they were from different companies. Sure it would be easy if the artists were from the same company, but different artist collaborating wasn’t something never heard off. Their own old fellow from Produce 101, former JBJ member Kim Sangyun from Hunus and Takada Kenta from Starroad even formed a permanent duo and debuted together._

 

_“Yeah,” Seongwoo nodded again, “I promise.”_

 

_—_

 

“This isn’t real,” Seongwoo told Daniel. The Fantagio actor cupped the MMO idol’s face and sighed, “Sure, it would be wonderful if all of these ‘we living together’ is real… but I didn’t want to leave my company—my CEO, my colleagues, the staffs… all of them are my family.”

 

“And I’m not…?” Suddenly, Daniel’s voice carried a tone of accusation, “Am I not as precious as them? Am I not your family, then?”

 

Instead of getting angry or anxious, Seongwoo smiled. “I’m not worry about you, Niel-ah.” He said, tone light and full of certainty, “We are more than my bond with Fantagio. You are my future. My forever, my everything.”

 

“Eventhough you tried to push me away from your life, _Hyung_? You lied before, remember? You tried to cover the truth from me. You planned to ended ‘us’—don’t you dare deny the truth,” Daniel sounded so cold and harsh, “What’s with ‘you are more than my bond’? Your future? Your forever? Everything, you said? What a joke.”

 

Seongwoo froze as those accusations hit him hard, each of them tore a wound inside his heart. “Daniel—“

 

“Such a hypocrite.”

 

“Niel-ah…”

 

“I don’t need your holier-than-thou attitude, _Hyung_.”

 

“No…”

 

“Don’t say that you have a reason for that and you didn’t really mean it, I have enough of that bullshit, Seongwoo _Hyung._ ”

 

“Listen to me…!”

 

All of the sudden, everything was swirled. Seongwoo opened his eyes and blinked several times. His head felt so muddled. The world still felt like it was upside down. A light tap touched his cheek, rubbed his skin in a familiar manner. “Seongwoo-ya,” The voice was low, calling his name with a hidden intimacy.

 

Seongwoo blinked again. Slowly, his gaze focused. He recognized the studio’s ceiling—almost bare with steel structures and so many lights pinned to the rigged grid. A second later, he realized that he was sleeping on the sofa, a checkered flannel blanket covered his torso, reached to his knee—the rest of it was thrown down to the side. His neck felt stiff as he slept without any pillow to support his head, and being kept in weird position didn’t help the situation much.

 

The raven haired actor rubbed his eyes, blinked again a few times before his gaze captured a familiar face starring at him. The light illuminated Daniel’s figure from behind, biased a bright white hue on his hair and torso. For a second there, the delirious Seongwoo thought that he had seen an angel. Daniel’s blonde hair looked especially ethereal under the diffused light.

 

“Niel—?”

 

“You’re awake?” Daniel asked him, fingertips still lingered on Seongwoo’s cheeks, “They were calling for you.”

 

“Ah,” Seongwoo recognized the drama set, “I fell asleep…?”

 

Daniel hummed in confirmation, “About 30 minutes or so. You looked really tired, so I want to let you sleep… but your scenes would be next so the staff asked me to woke you up.”

 

“I see…”

 

The dream still haunted his mind as Seongwoo tried to shifted his position into a sitting one. His blanket fell and pooled on his lap. Furrowed his brows, Seongwoo pinched the bridge of his nose. His temple was slightly throbbing. “Are you okay…?” Daniel seemed to notice his frown, “Do you feel uncomfortable—?”

 

Seongwoo was still silence. Daniel kneeled in front of him, head tilted so he could sneak a peek to see the latter’s expression. “…Seongwoo-ya?”

 

“Niel,” Seongwoo suddenly lifted up his gaze—their eyes locked onto each other, “Do you… ever resented that I insisted to stay at Fantagio and didn’t join you guys at MMO?”

 

The question was sudden and unexpected for Daniel. The younger male blinked, didn’t know what reaction he should offer. “Well,” Those fingertips reached for Seongwoo’s temple, kneaded the tensed part using gentle massages, “I don’t know about what I feel before… but…”

 

“But?”

 

“Well sure I do prefer that we’re on a same company,” Daniel continued, “That way we would stay at the same dorm. It would be easier to meet… and do stuffs.” He slightly blushed, “But you picked Fantagio, and you are a great actor. Fantagio got better resources for acting department. MMO wasn’t really stable for those area, and your acting talent would ended up wasted. I’m…”

There was a pause. “I only wished that we could have many schedules together—working together again. In one of another way, this cameo role is one of them,” He smiled, “So I’m happy. I’m content enough, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

Seongwoo’s eyes felt hot all of the sudden. “It’s not like I’m choosing Fantagio over… you,” He whispered, voice faint in secretive—only Daniel could hear his words. Seongwoo whispered again, “It’s just… I still haven’t done my part at Fantagio. I felt I need to prove myself. It’s not like I’m putting my company in higher pedestal than you or our relationship.”

 

His tone sounded like he was choked. Daniel smiled as he patted Seongwoo’s hair gently, careful not to ruin the hairstyle, “I know.” His voice was low and gentle. “I know, don’t worry about it.”

 

When another call for Seongwoo was heard, the two of them paused. Seongwoo stole a glance to the mirror in the vanity and wore Tae Woo’s suit jacket that he took off earlier, making sure he was ready to shoot. From the way they stand, he could see that the current scene would soon be over as long as there was no NG. “I’ll going then,” Seongwoo said to Daniel, preparing to his standby position near the office set.

 

“Wait—“

 

Daniel approached him closer, and touched Seongwoo’s cheek. The older male tensed as there were staffs now, surrounding them—and he was certain that more than one smartphone was directed on their directions, not only taking photos but also recording their interactions.

 

“Ni—“

 

“Your lash fell,” Daniel smiled as he showed his fingers to Seongwoo—those fingers made a pinching gesture, seemed like he was holding something on his fingertips, “See? Here.” Then he blew his fingers and cheerfully grinned to Seongwoo. The actor was taken aback for a second; Daniel looked so innocent and puppy-like, but Seongwoo knew that there was no fallen lash on Daniel’s fingers and there was none of it from the first place—Seongwoo felt Daniel’s fingers traced his moles earlier, before quickly pretending to pick the non-existed lash from his cheeks.

 

Seongwoo smiled back. “Thanks,” He said, eyes gleamed with _I knew what you just did_ code.

 

* * *

 

**[Pann] Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo Bromance at Summer’s Constellation Drama Set**

OP worked as a staff at the set and she witnessed OngNiel’s fullblown bromance there. Kang Daniel came to the set to practice his role with Ong Seongwoo and they keep practicing on the waiting room. Apparently Kang Daniel also helped the staff to wake Ong Seongwoo from his nap, massaged Ong Seongwoo’s temple, then he patted the older male’s head as well; but she was unable to record or take pics of those interactions. She managed to capture the moment when Kang Daniel took a fallen lash on Ong Seongwoo’s cheeks though. OP stated that the two of them was really close and often laughed with each other. The practice went well and OP was surprised at how good Kang Daniel’s acting ability under Ong Seongwoo’s guidance. 

[gif]

**source:** **user**

 

[+179, -4] OMG ONGNIEL!!!!  ♡ ✧ (  ु • ⌄ • ) Thanks OP for my daily dose of OngNiel!

[+77, -3] It’s so heartwarming to see them work together again like this. I really want to see their dumb and dumber actions again.

[+69, -4] So… will Kang Daniel participate more as an actor in the future? His previous acting was not bad on the MVs, and now he acted as a cameo on Seongwoo’s drama. Little steps, but it matter!

[+57, -3] Seriously, now I’m anticipating the cameo scene more than ever. So excited!! Cannot wait for the episode to be aired~!!!  ⊂ ( ◉ ‿ ◉ ) つ

[+15, -110] It’s just me or Kang Daniel sticked to Ong Seongwoo just to create hype these days? He keep approaching Ong Seongwoo, especially on the drama set, just to made himself relevant. He even got a cameo role for this effort, riding Ong Seongwoo’s coattails.

[+39, -2] Um, user^ seemed to be Ong Seongwoo’s akgae fan? 

[+442, -8] The akgae fan was rude^. Please be polite and think rationally. Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo are friends and they obviously enjoy each other company. I don’t see anything wrong with ex-members of a same group to keep in touch and maintain a good relationship with each other. 

[+158, -12] Oh wow. This is why I cannot stand akgae fan. Seriously? This whole ‘riding the coattails’ thing was an old news rinsed over and over again. On the beginning of Produce 101, they used to say that Daniel was riding Seongwoo’s coattails—then it got reversed during WANNA ONE era, they blamed Seongwoo to take advantage of Daniel’s popularity. Now after the disbandment, they tried to maintain a good relationship and what the akgae fans do? Accusing the old ‘riding the coattails’ over and over again. Grow up please.

 

* * *

 

On the drama set, Seongwoo laughed as his co-actor joked about something. The camera man was still adjusting the camera mount, so they got a few minutes to spare. Seongwoo did a little stretch, then stole a glance at Daniel—the younger male was sitting on a foldable chair by the monitor, a few paces away from the director’s seat. 

 

A staff approached him and gave him a canned coffee; Daniel took it and said thanks, slightly bowed his head before those eyes darted back to the set—right onto Seongwoo. Daniel’s gaze was gentle, adoring. The youth smiled at Seongwoo, did a little wave, then gestured his lover a ‘fighting!’ fist pump followed by a thumbs up. Seongwoo chuckled again, nodded as he gave a thumbs up back, almost hearing a sweet love song on his ears.

 

♪ ♫♬ _Say baby, say to me_

_The words that keep me goin’_

_Yeah, I know you know ‘em_

_Say baby, say to me_

_The words to make me heal_

_I love the way they feel_

_You give me some of that, some of that_

_Sweet sweet talk ♪_ ♫♬

 

None of them realized another pair of eyes stared at them—biting down the lower lips, fingers twisted as nails were digging onto the palm… slowly whispering, _“You are annoying…”_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, for you guys in Indonesia, especially Jakarta:  
> I'll go to [Amour Sans Fin - Kang Daniel x Ong Seongwu Cupsleeve Event](https://twitter.com/drunkON_you/status/1075375983308357632)  
> -  
> 12th January 2019  
> Caffe Bene, Jakarta Selatan  
> 11 AM - 3 PM  
> -  
> I'll probably handed out some freebies as well. I'll update about it on [my IG](https://www.instagram.com/mizunohikaru/) so please check the post and insta-story during that day if you wanna meet me / get the freebies :)) 
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	27. Time Flies When You Are Busy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t get sick,” The raven haired said, almost a whisper. He retreated his hand and placed them on Daniel’s knees, his idle thumb made circle patterns on the latter’s denim, right to the shredded hole part. “I couldn’t always nurse you when you’re sick… you know?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!!  
> How's your weekend? Do you guys have some fun?
> 
> I went to "Amour Sans Fin" OngNiel Cup Sleeves event last Saturday at Cafe Bene and it was fun!   
> Ahahahaa any of you guys got my freebies? Btw, I was surprised that quite a few of the attendees recognized me and were actually my (silent) readers LOLZZZ Drop a comment once in a while too guys, so I could use your usernames in my story as well~ ^^b

 

* * *

 

People said that _‘time flies when you are busy’—_ or is it when you are having fun? Either way, Daniel really did feel how fast time passed these days. It was like he caught in a whirlwind, a true chaos; he was so busy that he raced from place to place, following his hectic schedule. In one particular busy day, Youngsik Hyung would wake him up way before sunrise. Daniel usually was still half-asleep when he was dropped to the hair salon, his make up staff would do his face on the same time to shortened the preparation time. 

 

After a cup of coffee—maybe sometimes two—he would start his day, from one building to another. He felt like a worker bee, moving non stop from day to night. Youngsik made sure he would got maximum three jobs per day, or maybe four if there was short distance to travel from one job to another. Since he was still losing his memory, Daniel’s jobs were divided into two categories: longer working hours one like when he appeared in variety shows or any television programme, or shorter period working hours when he was invited to do interviews and photoshoots. 

 

The company had arranged to not doing any fanmeeting at the moment, since they were afraid that fans could find out about his amnesia. Even so, his jobs were plenty. It was a bit overwhelming in the beginning, but he couldn’t be mad to Youngsik Hyung: the older male was obviously waking up earlier than him and went sleep far late than him. And Daniel do need the jobs; being idol is such a short lived job, and staying relevant to maintain his fame was a necessary. So after he adjusted to his schedule and found out that Youngsik Hyung was truly tried to accommodating and only picked the best offers for him, Daniel was thankful. 

 

The only thing he lamented was how limited he could see Seongwoo face to face. Sure they chatted via messenger apps and phone a plenty, but it wasn’t the same. His most cherished moments were when he was sent to Seongwoo’s place for their acting practice. Daniel felt it wasn’t enough though—they usually met in Seongwoo’s drama set and it was hardly the two of them. Daniel hadn’t really cuddle or kiss with Seongwoo, let alone… doing the deeds. Just holding the latter’s hands was difficult enough, since Seongwoo was still so paranoid about them being found out. Since it would ended up as a big scandal, the whole holding hand and lovey dovey issue was also a big no no from Jisung and other’s perspective.

 

_Keep it behind the closed door,_ Jisung told him one night when Daniel whined about how he missed Seongwoo and really want to kiss the older male. His breaktime period before was really a gift, he realized, during those days he really got his freedom and he could visit and crashed Seongwoo’s place almost all the time.

 

“You got eyebags,” Seongwoo commented when Daniel visited for their last practice session. The two of them were sitting on two foldable chairs, facing each other. Seongwoo unconsciously reached out to Daniel; fingertips touched the shadow appeared beneath Daniel’s aegyo sal area. It was darkened for sure, and he could see the tiredness hidden beneath all the foundation and concelaer—they were living together so closely before during WANNA ONE era, and this side of Daniel’s appearance was way too familiar to Seongwoo. “Do you got enough sleep?”

 

“I do,” Daniel answered, but after a pause that didn’t convinced Seongwoo at all. The actor sighed, “One or two hours didn’t count.” Being an actor give him more time to rest compared to his idol days. Sure, Seongwoo’s schedule was quite hectic—drama shooting took really a long time and often scheduled on bizarre hours, but it wasn’t as tiring since he got some breaktimes between the shoots. Seongwoo still got several idol job offers as in interview, photoshoots and appeared as panelist on variety shows, but they weren’t as much as Daniel do. His jobs these days focused more to his acting career.

 

“I got three to four hours, so I do hope that count,” Daniel tried to joke, but Seongwoo’s expression fell. He looked so discontent, worried. “Don’t get sick,” The raven haired said, almost a whisper. He retreated his hand and placed them on Daniel’s knees, his idle thumb made circle patterns on the latter’s denim, right to the shredded hole part. “I couldn’t always nurse you when you’re sick… you know?”

 

Once before, Daniel fell ill when they were shooting for Master Key. The other members were leaving to Japan and hadn’t come back—there were only the two of them and Seongwoo was so scared shitless when Daniel fainted on the set.

 

“I know,” Daniel answered, soft—he placed his hand atop Seongwoo’s and gave it light pats. “I’ll make sure to stay healthy.”

 

They stay quiet for a while, then Seongwoo took out the script and coughed a bit. “Let’s… practice.” Daniel’s solemn face melted as a smile broke and appeared on his face. He stared at Seongwoo, whom looked so awkward—there were crimson hue dusted on his cheeks and the tip of his ears. “Okay,” he said, and took his own script.

 

 

**SCENE 84**

**EXT. SEOUL, ROAD OUTSIDE THE CAFE**

_TAE WOO and YOUNG JIN are the last workers to leave the place. The other workers are going for another round.TAE WOO looked rather drunk, he was swaying as he stand in his place._

 

**TAE WOO**

Second round—? I don’t feel well, so…

 

**MIN SEONG**

Hey, are you alright?

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** I’ll take care of him, you guys can go ahead. Hyung, I’ll send you home, okay? Aaaah—don’t fall! Here, lean on me.

 

**TAE WOO**

Mmm…

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** Hyung, is taxi okay? Hyung? 

 

**TAE WOO**

I don’t feel good…

 

**YOUNG JIN**

**** Hyung…! Are you okay? Do you feel nauseated? Can you stand—? HYUNG…!

 

 

Their scenes really gave a strong bromance vibe. For fangirls, especially the rotten ones, would definitely squealing and turning their scenes into fanfics. The drunk Tae Woo would stumbled on the street, swaying with red cheeks and half-lidded eyes. Young Jin tried his best to steadied his sunbae, asking for Tae Woo’s address so he could accompanied him home by taxi. The younger male fussed as Tae Woo seemed nauseated but unable to puke. Then he went to a minimart to purchase a bottle of _[Hutgaesoo](https://blog.trazy.com/5-best-korean-drinks-that-will-save-you-from-a-massive-hangover/)_ —the oriental raisin tea was said to be one of the best hangover recovery drinks.

 

Then, when he stepped out of the minimart, Young Jin would call for Tae Woo; but the older male seemed to stand in a daze. Following Tae Woo’s line of sight, Young Jin soon found Hae In in another man’s arm. The tall and handsome man looked rich, his suit and coat reeks of money and prestige. The woman who supposed to be Tae Woo’s girlfriend was giggling and half-hugging the stranger male. The man coaxed her and grabbed her waist, tried to hail a taxi, unaware about Tae Woo who spotted them from the distance.

 

Young Jin recalled Tae Woo’s colleague’s remarks. Min Seong undirectly hinted that Tae Woo was so depressed lately because his girlfriend cheated on his back. They didn’t know whether they had ended the relationship or not, or if Tae Woo had confronted her about it after the incident at Hae In’s apartment before.

 

Remembering how Hae In mocked and belittled Tae Woo during their school years before, Young Jin’s blood was boiling. He never understand what’s good from Hae In that Tae Woo seemed to really love her. Tae Woo was a really nice sunbae that treated his hoobaes kindly, helping them whenever they found difficulties during club activities. Young Jin was nicknamed Tae Woo’s fanboy, he almost worshiped his sunbae since he respected him so much. Thus, Hae In was always listed on the top row of his blacklist counting, since she treated his favourite sunbae so horribly.

 

Even now, this girl hurt Tae Woo so much. Young Jin dashed to Tae Woo’s side, the plastic bag rustled as he ran. The taller younger male stood in front of Tae Woo, obstructing the latter’s view and as he covered Tae Woo’s eyes using his palm, he painedly said, “Don’t see…!”

 

Young Jin didn’t know if the drunk Tae Woo would remember the scene, but Young Jin felt so helpless. He almost blamed himself to left Tae Woo in front of the minimart before—if he asked him to visit the shop as well, Tae Woo probably won’t notice Hae In at all. 

 

Tae Woo’s voice was faint as he tried to say something, “I—“

 

“Please forget about her, Hyung,” Young Jin’s tone of voice was trembling, “She didn’t worth your love and attention.” 

 

_She didn’t deserve you._

_At all._

 

“I used to love her so much…” Tae Woo said, and Young Jin bit his own lips in frustation. His palm felt wet; Tae Woo was crying and his tears felt hot against Young Jin’s hand. The younger male growled—he didn’t want Tae Woo to be dejected like this. He pulled the latter into his arms, Tae Woo’s face pressed into his shoulder. Young Jin’s shirt slowly dampened due Tae Woo’s tears—the older male’s shoulder trembled as he let the younger male to tightened his embrace.

 

_ “Forget about her, Hyung.” _

 

“Ah,” Daniel interrupted their dialogue reading, “Wait—“ He signaled. Seongwoo raised his eyes from the script, “Yeah?”

 

“Teacher-nim,” Daniel teased, “I want to ask—AAAWWW!” The older male gave him a punch on his arm. Daniel laughed, “Sorry, sorry. But I want to ask—“ He leaned closer, pretended to cover Seongwoo’s eyes using his palm, “Should I do it like this… or like this? My other hand was holding the plastic bag, right?”

 

Daniel’s hand was big and warm—Seongwoo could felt the warmth radiated from the latter’s skin even with several centimeters gap from his face. Fighting the impulse to snuggled his face on that opened palm, Seongwoo took Daniel’s hand and corrected the posture, “Like this is better, I think.”

 

“Okay.” Daniel noted on his script. “So, next scene…? The hug…?”

 

From afar, a smartphone’s camera was zoomed at their direction. The figure was half-hidden behind a pillar, bending her figure as she bit her lower lip in annoyance. _“You are annoying,”_ she repeatedly whispered, almost like chanting a curse.

 

* * *

 

It was later in the late of day when Jihyo Noona came to the set to pick them up. Daniel didn’t have another schedule until tomorrow afternoon, so he asked Youngsik to let him stay at Seongwoo’s place for the night. His manager didn’t see why not, so he replied okay and asked Daniel to get ready tomorrow when Youngsik would pick him up so they could directly go to the photoshoot in the afternoon.

 

“Thanks, Hyung,” Daniel ended the phonecall and put his smartphone on his pocket. He took his bag and carried it on one shoulder. As they waited for the car, Daniel and Seongwoo stood side by side—shoulders rubbed onto each other. Daniel leaned down and whispered something to Seongwoo’s ear, and the older male chuckled; gave a light pat on Daniel’s forearm, then pulled the taller male once again, whispering something in return at Daniel’s ear. The blonde male laughed, merry and happily, eyes crinkled into two two thin crescent lines.

 

Once again from afar, a certain smartphone captured their moments. Endlessly made a clicking sound as it repeatedly captured frames after frames—almost like a burst shot. 

 

_Click._

_Click, click, click._

 

Then again.

 

_Click, click, click._

 

Followed by a grunt, another frown, followed by a protest.

“…you are annoying—“

 

* * *

 

**@prettysmole**

[pic]

JBTC posted a new banner for The Summer’s Constellation~! Apparently Kang Daniel’s cameo role is Ong Seongwoo’s Tae Woo’s hoobae named Young Jin （ *’ ∀ ’ 人） ♥

**via twitter**

 

**@tallmade** replied to **@prettysmole**

OMG I love the banner! Daniel looked so good wearing that suit!!  ♥♥♥

**via twitter**

 

**@ongnielnoona** replied to **@prettysmole**

Really excited for their scenes!! Thank you JBTC and drama’s staffs!! Thank you Summer’s Constellation’s writer-nim!! ILU so much aaaahhhhh //////

**via twitter**

 

**@ongie** replied to **@prettysmole**

The director said that there will be a flashback scene when the two of them were still in high school… I’M SO EXCITEEEEDDD!!!

[fangirling gif]

**via twitter**

 

**@dafdaf** replied to **@prettysmole**

Sis, you know what… I predicted that there will be a lot of Min Seong x Tae Woo fanfictions after the drama aired LOLLLZZZ

**via twitter**

 

**@irene2005** replied to **@prettysmole**

Is it only me that didn’t want Young Jin only appeared as a cameo? Even something like a support role i.e. Tae Woo’s co-worker Min Seong is fine—you know, the role that don’t really appear much but always there? UWU

**via twitter**

 

**@00Seongwoo1stFan00** replied to **@prettysmole** and **@irene2005**

Kang Daniel isn’t an actor. I don’t think he will have a good skill to appear as a permanent role. It is too much to use Ong Seongwoo over and over again for his selfishness.

**via twitter**

 

**@GalacticIdol** replied to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00**

I’m sorry, but that’s rude. It’s true that Kang Daniel isn’t an actor but he did act in many MVs and shoots before. He has decent acting skills.

**via twitter**

 

**@00Seongwoo1stFan00** replied to **@GalacticIdol**

So what? Decent means not good enough. Kang Daniel is dragging down the whole drama.

**via twitter**

 

**@GalacticIdol** replied to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00**

Whoa. You are an akgae fan, aren’t you? Ong Seongwoo is teaching Kang Daniel about acting, you know? They stated that he gave lessons to Daniel. It’s like you are saying that Seongwoo sucks at teaching in roundabout ways.

**via twitter**

 

**@00Seongwoo1stFan00** replied to **@GalacticIdol**

Truly what a move. Sure, twist my words and attack me like that by insulting Ong Seongwoo in the process.

**via twitter**

 

**@leinad** replied to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** and **@GalacticIdol**

**@00Seongwoo1stFan00** you are being rude. It was you who twisted **@GalacticIdol** ’s words. Couldn’t we just celebrating the cameo peacefully without you acting up like this?  
**via twitter**

 

**@irene2005** replied to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00**

Seriously, I don’t understand why’d you act like this. If you didn’t like my post, you can simply scrolled down and ignore it. Do you really need to comment such a rude response? I think it’s nice that Daniel and Seongwoo are still so close even after WANNA ONE’s disbandment.

**via twitter**

 

**@00Seongwoo1stFan00** replied to **@irene2005**

WANNA ONE disbanded for a reason. What? Kang Daniel didn’t want to lose attention since he wasn’t the center of that temporary group anymore? Is that why he used Seongwoo’s archievement to gain a role in the drama? He really carved for attention, eh?

**via twitter**

 

**@irene2005** replied to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00**

Shame on you. Ong Seongwoo is obviously happy and excited about Daniel’s cameo role. If you are his fan, why did you act like this? You are disrespecting Ong Seongwoo by behaving like this!

**via twitter**

 

**@Ageha** replied to **@leinad** and **@GalacticIdol** and **@irene2005**

Just checked **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** profile. It’s just a spam side account. Never post anything, just attacking another person’s posts. No need to talk with this account, the person is obviously a troll.

**via twitter**

 

**@ice_flow** replied to **@Ageha**

Ah, you’re right! This person must be an akgae fan. So annoying. No need to feed this troll, just ignore the reply…!

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

It was like dancing in the dark. 

The only source of light was the bedside lamp, dim and golden, biased a soft halo on Seongwoo’s figure. Daniel was sitting on the edge of the bed, and Seongwoo’s hands slowly met Daniel’s; fingertips touched each other. Fingers intertwined, and Daniel tugged the older male closer—Seongwoo fell into his arms, their torso pressed against each other.  


No one speak, but words weren’t necessary. 

 

Seongwoo’s body felt warm, feverish under Daniel’s touch. The older male let a small gasp out as Daniel sneaked his hand under the raven haired male’s shirt, intimately trailed upwards across the latter’s back. The older male circled his hands around Daniel’s shoulder, smiling as he was cupping the younger male’s face, showering it with peppering kisses.

 

“It’s been a while…” Daniel whispered, pulled Seongwoo down for a long, passionate kiss. Seongwoo gave in and put one of his knee on the bed, next to Daniel. The blonde male was supporting him, but the raven haired still felt his knee weakened due Daniel’s touches.

 

Wet smacking voices filled the room with ambiguous atmosphere. Seongwoo was breathless, cheeks heated up as Daniel’s traced down to his pliant waist and dangerously started to tugged on the hem of Seongwoo’s pants. He slicked Daniel’s hair, combed those locks using his fingers, brushed down any locks that fell on the latter’s forehead. 

 

“Seongwoo-ya…” Daniel’s pupils were blown wide, gleamed under the golden light, “…may I—?”

 

Seongwoo leaned in again, and kissed the younger male’s forehead. “Yes,” he replied, soft and gentle—surrendering himself into his lover’s embrace. “Yes, Daniel… please take me.” 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...aaanndddd it's a cliffhanger~! /bricked  
>  AHAHAHAHHAA are you guys ready for the smut scene for the next chapter?? :3
> 
> Btw, I made @dafdaf replied to @prettysmole coz I just confirmed that the two of them are from the same town (do you two know each other, btw? LOLZZZ)
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	28. You are Mine, I Want You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kiss went on and on. It wasn’t a battle of dominance; it was a dance, a tango for two. A conversation, a play, a mutual understanding. Daniel and Seongwoo explored slowly, teasing each other, lips kneaded onto each other—soft, tingling and filled with so much emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday, my lovelies~!!  
> Sorry for posting this current chapter quite a lot later than my usual schedule (usually around 9-10 AM at my timezone) but IDK why but BAM~ the sales came to my desk and requested a lot of promos that need to be done ASAP coz those things need to be uploaded to the web ASAP. Plus I was the one who ordered the birthday cake for my 2 co-workers so I was messaging back and forth with the vendor, with another co-worker to confirm about the cake, and last but not least, the delivery guy LOLZ (If you follow [my instagram](https://www.instagram.com/mizunohikaru/), you'll see the cake--I'll post the cake today later :3)
> 
> But yeah, here it is: the NSFW chapter you guys had been waiting for ROFLMAO.  
> Enjoy~!!!

 

* * *

 

The room was absolutely not quiet—despite with no one saying anything, it was filled instead with pants and groans. Daniel, still embracing the older male, slowly peeled Seongwoo’s top; revealing the latter’s bare torso, lean and taut like a carved jade. His alabaster skin looked golden under the light, making him looked like an ethereal being—a spirit, a muse, something magical and so beautiful that giving inspirations for artist to be re-materialized as a masterpiece.

 

Half standing and half kneeling on the bed as he put his weight onto his right knee, Seongwoo’s left leg buckled as his bones felt powerless against the younger’s touch. Daniel supported him, pulled him closer, every strokes the blonde gave him send shivers to Seongwoo’s spine. They felt so familiar, spreading heat to his nerves, burning his body with desire.

 

The night was still young. Unhurriedly, Daniel tugged the hem of Seongwoo’s waistline once again. His fingers traced the round metal clasp and unbutton it in a snap. Those fingers proceed to found the zipper and pulled it down. The pants material hanged loose on Seongwoo’s hips. As Daniel swept his palm onto Seongwoo’s twin buns and kneaded them slowly, the rest of the pants fell and pooled on Seongwoo’s ankles. He stepped out and his long legs went into full view.

 

Daniel licked his own lips, eyes sharp as he gazed intensely onto Seongwoo’s every expression. The raven haired was panting, his cheeks were tinted with dust of crimson, those almond shaped were misty as his breaths ragged. Seongwoo combed Daniel’s hair again, slowly cupped the younger male’s face, then leaned down to kiss the latter’s forehead and teasingly nip on the tip of Daniel’s aquiline nose.

 

Daniel smiled, put more strengh as he pulled Seongwoo forward—they ended up lying on the bed, Seongwoo atop of Daniel’s body. Caressed the back of Seongwoo’s head, Daniel gestured the latter to leaned down, locking their lips together. Their tongues tangled together passionately—Seongwoo’s was muffled when Daniel’s fingers went down to his nape, caressing his spine. 

 

The kiss went on and on. It wasn’t a battle of dominance; it was a dance, a tango for two. A conversation, a play, a mutual understanding. Daniel and Seongwoo explored slowly, teasing each other, lips kneaded onto each other—soft, tingling and filled with so much emotions. When they were breathless and finally gasped for air, a thin silvery string of saliva connected the two of them before it snapped and broke the connection. Seongwoo traced Daniel’s lower lip, smiling as he found it was swollen due their fiery kiss. From the numbness of his own, he knew that his own lips suffered the same state.

 

Daniel’s eyes were half-lidded, gleamed dangerously. Seongwoo felt that shivers of excitement again. When he was performing on stage, the younger male always emitted a strong, explosive pheromone and charisma. Now the very same raw glare was painted on Daniel’s face, silently screaming _You are mine, I want you._

 

Seongwoo wanted to conveyed his own thought—he was thinking the same thing: _You are mine, mine only_. Daniel is beloved by so many people, not only in Korea but also overseas, but the younger male is essentially his and always his. _Mine_ , Seongwoo thought as he smirked, lowered his face and put his lips on Daniel’s collarbone. He gave it a peck, then a teasing gnaw. He licked the spot, sucked the milky white skin to leave a mark. He knew Daniel didn’t mind, in fact the blonde was giving him an encouraging hum as he did the deed.

 

Seongwoo bit his lower lip when Daniel pulled his brief down after series of kneading and teasing. He complied, letting Daniel took his last article of clothing off before attacked the younger and almost impatiently stripped his lover from his shirt and pants as well. There was a tent forming on Daniel’s underwear, and as Seongwoo peeled it down, the hard member sprang out of the fabric. The curved length was standing proudly in front of Seongwoo.

 

“…aah—“

 

The bed dipped as they moved, but thankfully it didn’t emit any embarrassing creaks. Seongwoo moved his hips, swayed his lower body as he rubbed his own rigid member against Daniel’s. Both of the mushroom shaped heads were leaking the transparent pre-cum like crazy, lubricating the frictions. Lewd wet sound filled the air, and Seongwoo threw his head backwards as Daniel touched their members. Using his huge palm, Daniel circled their erections together and pumped them in a steady rhythm. 

 

The pleasure was intense, almost unbearable. Seongwoo arched his back. His legs felt like jelly. It was a good thing that Daniel supported his body in their half-sitting position, pillows were stacked on Seongwoo’s back to give him some supports. The musky smell of sex soon filled the room, mixed with the scent of bergamot and sandalwood from the reed infuser Seongwoo placed on the bedside table.

 

Daniel gave a last stroke and Seongwoo’s body shook, stomach tightened and muscles spasmed as the euphoria brought him to a new height. Took minutes to calmed himself, to let the sensation receded bit by bit. When his head wasn’t as muddled, Seongwoo realized that Daniel hadn’t come yet.

 

The younger male still sat on the bed, back half-leaned to the headboard—his thick thighs supported Seongwoo’s lithe ones. Seongwoo’s legs were still trembling; but he didn’t feel embarrassed as he was proud to show his lover that he enjoyed their foreplay. Daniel chuckled, stole a kiss on Seongwoo’s lips, then gently pushed the latter onto the pillows.

 

Nestled on heaps of soft cushion, Seongwoo’s back was half supported by the messy stacks of pillow pyramid so he didn’t lie flat on the mattress. Still, he stared at the ceiling with hazy eyes. His stamina was never great in the first place, so he closed his eyes and tried to save his energy. He could felt Daniel moved to the bedside table—the _clack clack_ sound hinted that the younger male was looking for their usual lube and condom. 

 

The next thing he knew, Daniel’s fingers traced around his opening. The lube coated fingers were warm and slick. Seongwoo relaxed his muscles and let Daniel inserted the first finger inside of him. It emitted a loud wet sound: s _quelch,_ s _quelch_ everytime Daniel pushed further in. Regulated his breathing, Seongwoo bit his lower lip unconsciously. Daniel found his sweet spot not long after the first two digit was buried inside of him.

 

“…nngghh—GAH—!”

 

The finger inside of him wriggled a bit, but keep probing on the spot over and over again. Seongwoo writhed as he arched his back, his thigh trembled—he opened his legs wider instinctively, giving Daniel a better access. Soon, the second finger joined in. The scissoring motion felt really familiar—Daniel always own this particular set of movements. Seongwoo’s inside recognized the sensation and gave in rather quickly.

 

Seongwoo’s toes curled as Daniel paced his three fingers in and out of his body. His ring of muscles had softened, welcoming the ministration delightedly. The alabaster skin flushed pink as Seongwoo felt the desire built intensely inside of him, created knots inside his stomach. Series of moans escaped his lips, unintentionally—Seongwoo had lost his reasons to hold back his voice.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

Daniel called his name, and Seongwoo’s heart trembled. His heart fluttered, longing and almost painful—his backside felt empty as Daniel had pulled out his fingers. The opening was gaping, leaving a small hole with lube glistening under the soft light from the bedside lamp. 

 

It felt like he was pampered in a gentle rocking motion, like a baby serenaded with the sweet lullaby by the mother—Seongwoo felt comfortable, as if he was resting between the cumulonimbus clouds. He was missing these kind of times with his lover; the precious time when the two of them pampered and enjoyed each other, skin on skin, sharing their body heats together.

 

Daniel bit the condom package and made a rip on the edge, took the polypropylene material and quickly rolled it into his length. Truthfully, Seongwoo didn’t mind if Daniel want to do him raw—but the cleaning process after the sex was indeed quite a handful; it need to be done meticulously so there won’t be any residue that would cause him a stomachache or any of health disruption.

 

Still dazed, Seongwoo felt Daniel cupped both of his cheeks before leaned down to kiss his lips again. The kiss was slow, almost torturous, savouring every inch of Seongwoo’s mouth. Seongwoo felt his body heated up once again, a soft whimper escaped his lips as he quickly wrapped his arms around Daniel’s shoulder and unconsciously grabbed on the latter’s back.

 

Daniel’s back was wide and full of muscles—Seongwoo had spent hours to stare at that sturdy back. It gave a strong urge to leaned onto that back, slowly hugged the person from behind. Now, he was cradled inside Daniel’s arms, his own hands reached onto the latter’s back—blunt nails digging onto the milky white skin, leaving shallow marks indentations.

 

Daniel’s breath felt hot against Seongwoo’s skin—the younger man exhaled the latter’s scent, half buried his face on the crook of Seongwoo’s neck. The older male’s lips was positioned near his ears, and Daniel felt a surge of possessiveness as Seongwoo panted and moaned his name. 

 

Steadied his lower half, the tip Daniel’s rigid member finally kissed Seongwoo’s opening. The ring of muscles immediately reacted, and Seongwoo let out a loud gasp. The younger’s length felt hot and pulsating, probed his opening a few times before slowly pushed inside, entered him inch by inch.

 

“Niel—“

 

Seongwoo could felt how his inside walls received the familiar rod, contracted and pulled the member tightly. The shivers made his body shook once again, the sensations were difficult to bear. His moans were inaudible, wordless, only his lips gaped as his brows furrowed due the intense, overwhelming waves of pleasure.

 

Daniel gave a strong final thrust, buried himself deep, and Seongwoo finally yelped—the loud gasp was soon followed with more soft and endless moans as Daniel slowly moved and paced himself. Daniel rolled his hips, made a scrape motion using his member, and Seongwoo held his breath.

 

He wanted to ask the younger male to move, but before he opened his mouth to voiced his request, Daniel suddenly made a sudden thrust—followed by a rather wild and ruthless in and out movements. The frictions send jolts of pleasure to Seongwoo’s neurons, drowned his senses and covered his sights with loads of stars. The slapping noises between their bodies sounded so dirty, every _pah_ sound was followed with the lewd wet squelch sound.

 

“Ni…el—“

 

“Seongwoo-ya…”

 

Seongwoo felt he would soon be numb due the over sensory, but the numbness never came. Instead, the sensations builded up, messed his brain as it keep intensifying tenfold over the time. Seongwoo felt his hips and back gave out—he had arched them several times, tried his best to rationalize the pleasure yet failed each time.

 

Daniel grunted as Seongwoo’s insides enveloped his member and gave a tight, strong squeeze. The raven haired was so beautiful, captivating, lying there underneath him. Those crimson lips were swollen from their previous kisses, the pink hue flushed the latter’s cheeks as well as the tip of his ears and a bit on his shoulders, down to his neck.

 

It felt hot as their surrendered themselves to their most basic, primitive instinct. Seongwoo gasped and threw his head back whenever Daniel gave a hard thrust—his palm reached on the latter’s torso, upwards onto the broad shoulders. Once again, Seongwoo clung to Daniel; their midriff met during the wild friction—the connecting point of their body felt hot and stimulating.

 

Seongwoo didn’t know how much time had passed when Daniel rolled his hips and gave another thrust—his body reacted and finally he couldn’t hold it anymore, Orgasm rendered Seongwoo speechless, boneless as he could only gasped. His inner walls spasmed crazily and Daniel followed suit with a groan.

 

“Ah—?”

 

During the height of the pleasure that made him saw white, Seongwoo could felt a certain familiar wetness. Daniel was wearing protection, yet he could felt the oozing liquid painted his insides. Daniel made several other shallow thrust, emptying himself, before slowly pulled out his member—still half erected, as he too felt the familiar wet sensation.

 

A trail of white followed the tip of Daniel’s length, trickled through Seongwoo’s opening as Daniel realized the condom had been torn. The tip area was split apart, leaving a two centimetres gap that leaked the supposedly contained cum. “Ah,” Daniel took out the condom, “It got torn… sorry, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

Instead of complaining, Seongwoo coyly pasted a smirk on his face. He pushed Daniel down—the younger now sat against the headboard just like their previous position. There were confusion followed by a delightful surprise on Daniel’s face as Seongwoo climbed onto his lap, hands clutched onto his shoulders. The raven haired was half-lidded, cheeks flushed as he lowered his hips to Daniel’s member, more cum dripped down from his back entrance, stained the inside of his thigh before he positioned it upon the tip of Daniel newly rehardened member, engulfing the length in one swift motion. 

 

Both groaned as once again the rod was buried deep inside Seongwoo. The raven haired tightened his walls, gave the member teasing squeezes as he grinded his hips from side to side, before finally moved his body back and forth. “It doesn’t matter,” Seongwoo whispered seductively right into Daniel’s ear, “Mark me, Niel-ah…”

 

The seduction ignited a whole new passion and desire within Daniel. The blonde haired smiled, moved his lower half upwards in a piston-like movements, complying Seongwoo’s invitation. The night was still young. They still got enough time to enjoyed their moment, savouring every minutes together.

 

“Ah—slower… Ngghh… GUH…!” 

 

Seongwoo had forgotten one important point: Daniel got more stamina than him to begin with. It didn’t take long before another series of pants and groans and moans filled Seongwoo’s bedroom.

 

* * *

 

The girl was creating a montage.

There were scattered pieces of magazines clippings all around the floor. She carefully cut Seongwoo’s images along the lines, every one of them. The board in front of her was half covered with unfinished collage of Seongwoo’s photos—some of them were self-taken secretly using her phone camera.

 

Her idol was so handsome like a Greek God. His sharp features offered a whole new level of beauty—and she hated it whenever those expression softened, mellowed as the owner of the face conversed with his ex group member. Of course, she knew Kang Daniel—most people in Korea love the blonde boy, but he wasn’t her type and she preferred Ong Seongwoo better than the MMO idol.

 

These days, Kang Daniel visited their drama set like a routine. Using acting training as an excuse, Daniel always steals Seongwoo’s time on the set. She hates that. _You called yourself a famous idol yet you couldn’t let Ong Seongwoo alone and forced him to tutor you? What a joke._

 

She took another clipping from the magazine, cut Daniel photo apart from Seongwoo’s side, deliberately snipped the blonde haired idol’s neck using her scissor. _Snip snip._ “You are annoying,” she said, repeated the same sentence she always mutters whenever she see the two of them interacted—whether directly in front of her or merely snippet picture on the media. 

 

_Snip._

 

A piece of paper contained Daniel’s smiling face was cut into half, fell slowly onto the floor.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still emo whenever I remembered that WANNA ONE had finally disbanded for real XDXD  
> I need moar OngNiel's momentsssss UWU
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	29. No Matter What, I’ll Still Love You.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Mmm,” Daniel hummed his agreement, “Let’s stay together. Forever.”
> 
> “Forever,” Seongwoo nodded back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~~!  
> Yesterday was WANNA ONE's last day concert--my poor kokoro still cannot-- /hhhhhhhhhh/  
> I set the timeline of this fic happened AFTER the disbandment but the actual disbandment still get me hard ;______;  
> Ah, so much mixed feelings as I knew all of them got their own plans but I still want to see the evelen of them together ;_____;
> 
> Let's hope that they will stay close and keep contacting each other often just like on my story XDXD

 

* * *

 

The sun was barely up when the first alarm rang. It was Seongwoo who opened his eyes first, dazedly wake up eventhough it was Daniel’s alarm instead of his. He turned off the alarm and plopped the smartphone back onto the sheet next to Daniel’s pillow. The younger male was still sleeping, looking peaceful and angelic if you excluded the noise from his snores. 

 

Daniel was lying on his stomach, the head was facing Seongwoo’s side, his bare back was half on view thanks to Seongwoo’s pull and tug of the blanket the night before. One of Daniel’s arm was sprawled on Seongwoo’s torso, almost like a hug. The rest of his limbs were loose and free, almost on every direction—Daniel is a starfish type sleeper position as always.

 

His blonde locks start to losing their lightness these days, fading into something sandy or honey blonde; a shade or two darker than his initial dye. Some of the locks fell onto his forehead, covering half of his eyebrows, and Seongwoo stared at Daniel’s sleeping face almost without blinking. 

 

Something inside Seongwoo’s chest tightened. Daniel was lying on Seongwoo’s left—he always obsessed being on his left side these days. Before the amnesia, it wasn’t really matter; they just lied there somehow, alternating between the left and right side, as long as they were cuddling to each other. Yet these days Daniel had insisted being on Seongwoo’s left, so last night when they were cuddling and making out post-coitus—the euphoria of their orgasm still lingered and made them so mellow and sappy, Seongwoo asked about it.

 

“Ah,” The blush appeared on Daniel’s cheeks. It was light, but Seongwoo noticed it right away, “What? What is it?”

 

“I just…” The sentence lingered. Daniel hesitated and Seongwoo tugged him. “Well,” Daniel sheepishly confessed, “I just want to hear your heartbeats.”

“Eh?”

 

“It was easier to hear and feel your heartbeats if I was on your left,” Daniel said again, tried his best to explain, “They said the heart located on the left side, right? Therefore… yeah. Sorry, I couldn’t explain it well. But you got the gist.”

 

_Your left belongs to me._

_Your heart belongs to me._

_You… belongs to me._

 

Remembering their last night’s conversation, Seongwoo smiled. He sighed—his chest felt warm, his heartbeats went louder. Seongwoo reached out, fingertips brushed those locks aside from Daniel’s forehead. Then, the younger male stirred for a bit. His eyelids fluttered open, revealing the beady orbs inside, almost hazel under the morning light. “Hey,” Daniel mumbled, a smile widened on his lips, his voice was husky and dangerously low, “Morning. You’re awake?”

 

“Morning,” Seongwoo replied, the very same smile spread on his own lips. They said smile and laugh are contagious, and Daniel’s sure did. Those eyes crinkled again, then Daniel yawned before he rubbed his eyes and lazily stretch. “Your bed felt too comfortable,” It sounded like a protest, “I don’t want to woke up—“

 

“Don’t use me or my bed as your excuse,” Seongwoo pretended to pout and pushed Daniel. The younger male got a bigger frame build than him, so his push meant nothing at all. Daniel laughed and propped himself on his elbow, lied sideways and stared at Seongwoo using his eyesmiles.

 

“What?”

 

“You are beautiful,” He answered, blurted his thought honestly.

 

“It’s still morning and you’re sprouting all those sweet nothings already.”

 

“But I’m serious,” Daniel’s smile went wider, “You ARE beautiful.” He cupped Seongwoo’s cheek and pulled him closer, pinned the raven haired on the pillow, then leaned down to kiss him. It was a slow, gentle kiss that followed with many peppering pecks. “Stop it—“ Seongwoo wriggled, laughed as he put his palm on Daniel’s jaw, tried to push the blonde’s face away, “Your stubbles are prickling me…!”

 

There were indeed a thin shadow around Daniel’s mouth. It was faint, but the stubbles were indeed there, some of them were thicker than the rest. Being a male in his 20s, Daniel need regular shaving and trimming regularly. Some of the day, it won’t show right up in the morning, but today wasn’t one of those days. 

 

A glint appeared on Daniel’s eyes—his face expression turned mischievous as he hauled Seongwoo into his arms, pressed his face on Seongwoo’s face, chuckled as he nuzzled Seongwoo’s skin using his prickly stubbles. 

 

“Aiishh—stop it Niel-ah…!”

 

“But you love me, right—“

 

“Ah seriously this kid—!!”

 

In return, Seongwoo attacked Daniel’s stomach with tickles. The younger male yelped and tried to pressed his jaw more on Seongwoo’s neck; the raven haired groaned and repeated “…yaaahh—!” several times. It was minutes later when they was lying on the bed, side by side—breathless, their stomach and cheeks were hurt after laughing way too much. 

 

After the laughter quieted bits by bits, Daniel propped himself on his side once again—elbow on the mattress as he supported his head using his palm. He found that Seongwoo was looking at him, stared on his face in an unreadable gaze. “What is it…?” Daniel asked, his dark obsidian orbs gleamed golden under the morning’s light. His tone was lazy and lax, his lips showed a gentle smile.

 

“Well…” Seongwoo blinked slowly, his nose scrunched up as he got this habit of blinking both of his eyes on the same time. He looked so innocent and child-like at moments like these. 

 

“Well?”

 

“When I see you like this…“ Seongwoo keep staring at Daniel’s face, slowly reached out and touched Daniel’s face using his fingertips. He traced Daniel’s forehead, temple, eyebrows, the outlines of his nose, then down to his lips. Seongwoo smiled, “…it felt like a miracle.”

 

“…why?”

 

“Because I would remember our first meeting back then. I remembered that I saw you smiling and chatting with your MMO squad. You are wearing a blue denim jacket with one sleeveless part, leaving your one arm bare. I thought to myself: _that’s a rather unusual outfit, are he trying to show us his muscles?_ Your hair was pastel pink, and your cheerful, gentle face was kinda the opposite of ‘badass’ image your outfit emitted. I wondered about your mismatch assemble but it intrigued me so much. Then you guys performed GOT7’s sunbae’s song and it clicked: _ah, you are copying Jackson Wang’s outfit on the MV._ I praised you back then, you know? I thought that you really put your minds in details. I wondered if I could be your friends somehow… It was kinda unimaginable that we would became closer instantly and now… you are the most important person in my life.”

 

It sounded like a confession. Something inside Daniel’s chest felt heavy and tight. “I’m sorry,” He said then.

 

“Why?”

 

“Because currently I didn’t have that memory.”

 

“It’s… not your fault, Niel-ah.” Seongwoo assured him and Daniel nodded, “But you know what, Seongwoo-ya? I do remember when I saw you for the first time on the hospital. I remember your face, your expression, down to the details of your outfit. You were panicking back then, and those worry in your eyes made me wonder: _Who is this guy? What’s our relationship? He worried about me. He cares about me._ You stood there near the corner of the room, by the window when the doctors came to examined me. I remember how solemn you looked. The sunshine fell on your figure, bathing you with a glow of halo and I wondered again: _Who is this ethereal being? An angel? A muse?_ It’s…” He paused, searching for the correct word, “…it’s like love at the first sight.”

 

Seongwoo blushed.

 

“For some reason,” Daniel continued, “Wasn’t it just the same with you, Seongwoo-ya? Your story earlier sounded like you are falling in love with me at the first sight as well—or maybe just a crush… but you did say that you were intrigued by me, right?”

 

The smile on Seongwoo’s lips turned into a chuckle. “Yeah,” He nodded, “You’re right. Maybe it’s fate. We… are meant to be with each other. That’s why no matter what happened, even though I used to be stupid to betrayed our love by hiding the truth from you—“ Daniel reacted to this, he looked like he wanted to say something, but Seongwoo put a finger on Daniel’s lips, “In the end, I couldn’t make it undone. We’re falling too deep and fate keep bringing us together. I think… it’s just how things should be. It won’t be smooth sailing all the way and we would surely have our fights, our ups and down… but—“

 

Those onyx-like eyes were misty. Seongwoo’s eyes felt hot, he was trying his best to held back the tears. Daniel rubbed his shoulders, “But?”

 

“But I do believe we can make it through. It won’t be perfect, but we could do our best. Let’s do that… and stay together, okay Niel-ah.”

 

Daniel often wondered how things would be if he got his memories intact. Now is one of the moments he wished that he remembered everything—those memories he lost contained a lot of their moments and Daniel loathed the fact that he was missing out so many things as he didn’t remember any of the memories that Seongwoo mentioned. But still, his currect self was crazily in love with the older male. It’s just like those sayings: _No matter what, I’ll still love you._

 

“Mmm,” Daniel hummed his agreement, “Let’s stay together. Forever.”

 

“Forever,” Seongwoo nodded back.

 

* * *

 

That day was a rather lax day for the two of them. Both of them only got work during the evening, so they spent their morning together, planning their schedule to find an aligned free day together. They still remembered their plan to retrace their past, visiting the places that hold significant history for them and try to trigger Daniel’s memory. From his doctor’s statement before, it seemed eligible as it was one way to stimulated his brain and memory. 

 

“It seemed that we need to wait until the drama shooting,” Daniel said. Since the cameo role was a sudden schedule that didn’t really planned before, it took some of his free time. It tooks several days for his practice with Seongwoo, and the shooting itself would take quite a time.

 

Seongwoo nodded. His own schedule was more fixed than Daniel. His jobs were usually consisted of the drama’s shooting, photoshoot for magazines, CM shooting, and regular MC jobs. It was easier for him to tailored his free time to Daniel’s more unpredictable schedule. Seeing those jammed-packed agenda of his lover, Seongwoo cringed as it reminded him of their early WANNA ONE days. Their schedules were often so jammed-packed, it felt almost inhuman.

 

“We’ll start the drama’s shooting soon this week anyway,” Daniel pointed the bullet point, “I hope I’ll do a great job. I didn’t want to drag everyone down with so many NGs.”

 

“You’ll do fine,” Seongwoo assured him. Daniel did rather well during practice. If he did the same way during the actual shooting, it would be just fine—rather excellent. Daniel used to do a great job at their MV’s shooting, following the director’s order and gave his own flair in the same time. Their ‘Beautiful’ MV involved more acting than their usual MV, and even the plot line was rather chaotic and ended abruptly in a hanging, open ending that leaned towards a rather bad closure, Daniel’s acting was passable and he did a good job considered that he wasn’t an actor and didn’t have any acting lesson before.

 

“Mmm,” Daniel nodded obediently. He looked like a giant, oversized puppy. Seongwoo almost see his ears and tails wagging as the younger male beamed at him, “I’ll do just fine. I got the greatest acting coach in the whole world.”

 

“I’m not an acting coach,” Seongwoo corrected him, “And I’m not the best. I’m still lacking in so many ways.”

 

“But you are the best for me,” Daniel flirted, and Seongwoo couldn’t help to smile—he gave a light smack on Daniel’s arm. “Stop being so cheesy,” He said, though he didn’t mad about Daniel being sappy at all.

 

* * *

 

Jihyo came to Seongwoo’s apartement that afternoon to picked him up. Daniel had left an hour before, Youngsik was accompanying Jisung to his recital so the younger male took a taxi. It was only a short distance between Seongwoo’s apartment and the MMO dorm as they both located in Itaewon and only separated by a couple of blocks.

 

Seongwoo was feeling good, cheerful as he hummed a song while checking his phone, following Jihyo to their car, when a voice called his name. Both of Jihyo and Seongwoo stopped on their track; they found a petite woman with shoulder length straight hair bowed to Seongwoo and trotted forward, her face beamed.

 

“It’s me,” That’s the only thing she said as she stood there in front of Seongwoo and his manager. Seongwoo didn’t recognize this particular woman, so he looked confused—but Jihyo remembered the latter’s appearance. 

 

“You are that production staff from the drama,” She said. It wasn’t a question. Jihyo did remember this particular staff, since she saw the worker blushed and gawked on Seongwoo during their first visit to the location to shoot the series. It was a common reaction, other staffs did the same thing as her when they first meet Seongwoo, but something in Jihyo warranted a warning label for this particular woman. She didn’t have any prove about the matter, but her guts said so. It would be justified to said that her woman instinct is usually hit the mark.

 

Moreover, this woman was suddenly showed up on Seongwoo’s apartment. The parking area was usually exclusive for the residents, even Youngsik couldn’t park for a long time whenever he came to pick Daniel up. She obviously wasn’t a resident there—the apartment building was the expensive one, not the kind that common people could effort. Especially if the person was a low positioned staff that have no name, power or money.

 

Her manner was also lacking. She dared to call Seongwoo with such an affectionate _banmal_ , as if she was a close friend of Seongwoo. This woman didn’t greet Jihyo at all, didn’t start her sentence with a common phrases like good morning, good afternoon or good day—merely saying “It’s me” without introducing herself. She acted like she was a friend and Seongwoo knew her well, giving Jihyo a chill down her spine.

 

“Ah yes,” The woman nodded, “We worked on the same drama set.” Her tone was cheerful and deliberately high, sounded so fake in Jihyo’s ears. “Are you going to the set as well now?”

 

“No.”

 

Jihyo saw a glimpse of contempt on the woman’s face when she lied and saying no. This woman talked in such a roundabout way, hinted Jihyo and Seongwoo to let her ride the car together to the set. A red flag. Jihyo’s face was solemn and cold as she continued, “We’ll have some other bussiness before going to the set.”

 

“Ah, in that case may I tagged—“

 

“See you later there on the set,” Jihyo said, cutting the woman’s sentence as she signalled Seongwoo to follow her and immediately entered the car. Jihyo took a peek of Seongwoo from the rear mirror. Seongwoo’s face was rather dark. He looked like he got a lot on his mind.

 

“That woman is dangerous,” Jihyo warned him, “Be careful with her. Maintain your distance for now. I’ll try to notify the director and the production crew.”

 

“I know.”

 

When they did a turn to the spiralled track for the exit, both of Jihyo and Seongwoo saw the woman was still there, standing in the middle of parking area—unmoving, her back was facing their direction; with shoulder slumped and head hanging low.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annnddd the stalker appeared in front of Seongwoo, ladies and gentlemen~!! *cue Psycho thriller's shower scene SFX*
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	30. A Sasaeng Fan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seongwoo also feared that the sasaeng noticed their relationship. _What if she despised Daniel because of it? What if she try to hurt Daniel for revenge, or just in spite? What if—_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday Morning, my lovelies~!!  
> It's another Monday, so it's another new chapter for the week~ Enjoy ^^b
> 
> P.S. I named the sasaeng girl using random name generator, then googled the name. So far, there wasn't any public figure with the name so I assumed it's a safe name :3

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo pondered if he need to tell Daniel about the _sasaeng_ fan.

The woman didn’t show up at the set later in the day. Jihyo had immediately asked for a quick meeting with the director and the production head, asked about the said staff and told them what had happened earlier. Having any stalker or _sasaeng_ fans as a crew was a big no no for the drama production as well, so they took notice and promised Jihyo that they will deal with the situation quickly.

 

From the production head, Jihyo got a brief info about the woman: Her name is Chae Sook Hee. She was on her early 20s, just graduated for a year from university before taking a job as the one of the lower production staff on the drama set. Her main job on the set was being one of the stagehand staff, under the props division. Her division was supposedly got no direct interaction with any of the actors, but she tried to befriend the staffs from wardrobe and make up department, as well as the call staffs from management department—so she could ‘visit’ her friends to sneak a peek to Seongwoo.

 

Those staffs found her rather annoying since she acted so sickeningly sweet; her attitude felt fake as she keep acting cute to gain their favour, and disturbed them during work on some occasions—showed up and chattering while they were trying to work. Truthfully, Chae Sook Hee didn’t have any real friends on the set. She ignored and managed to pissed the other staffs from her division. Eventhough she never make big mistakes before, she was barely do the minimum work. The other staffs had been complained about her for a while, but since she didn’t make any fatal mistake before, they couldn’t do much to warn or punish her.

 

But then she creepily showed up at Seongwoo’s place and approached him like she is a really close friend of him was a whole other thing. It confirmed the other stuff’s accusation: this woman entered the drama set as a staff in order to get close to Ong Seongwoo.

 

The whole things summed up into a quick decision: Chae Sook Hee will be fired.

 

Jihyo nodded and thanked the head management staff, before informed the result of the meeting to Seongwoo. Being a rather soft hearted guy, Seongwoo felt kinda bad to Chae Sook Hee. To be suddenly fired must be harsh, but Jihyo convinced him not to take it to heart. 

 

“She didn’t do her work in earnest and honest way, so she just got it coming,” Jihyo explained behind the scene situation to Seongwoo. Just from the gist, everyone got the same conclusion: This woman is a _sasaeng_ fan and could be considered as a stalker. It was dangerous to let her stay and work there on the set.

 

As she knew her fate already, that day Chae Sook Hee didn’t come to the set. Her phone was off, no one couldn’t contact her. Jihyo suddenly felt restless—a bad premonition came to her. This _sasaeng_ girl wasn’t the type that so easily give up; there must be something on her sleeves.

 

“Be careful, okay?” Jihyo told Seongwoo again and again. She considered to ask for some bodyguards to accompany Seongwoo, but Fantagio’s higher up got so many procedures and the whole ordeal would take quite a while. “Be patient and vigilant for a few days,” Jihyo instructed him as she done typing her business email to Fantagio’s Human Resources Department, “I’ll try to get you at least a bodyguard. You need them for quite a while before, but those stupid penny-pinchers keep telling us no, using the excuse that you never got any big incidents after WANNA ONE.”

 

Seongwoo sighed. Fantagio got some issues and struggles, even when he was still in WANNA ONE. The higher ups were playing so much games in politics and schemed against one another. Seongwoo respected the CEO who handled him before, so he insisted to stay at Fantagio along with many of his co-workers to support the CEO. Things were kinda better these days, but the power struggle was still there. Fantagio was calm on the surface, but actually still rocky on the bottom. That’s why before WANNA ONE ended, Daniel approached him and asked him to join the MMO-sub company along with him—unfortunately Seongwoo declined the offer, saying he couldn’t leave Fantagio just like that.

 

_Daniel_.

 

Seongwoo sighed. His eyes shifted—restless. He wondered if he need to tell the latter about the _sasaeng._ His lover visited the set on regular basis and soon he would filmed his cameo role here on the very same set. Seongwoo also feared that the _sasaeng_ noticed their relationship. _What if she despised Daniel because of it? What if she try to hurt Daniel for revenge, or just in spite? What if—_

 

“Seongwoo.”

 

Jihyo’s voice brought him back to reality. His manager’s face were filled with concern. 

 

“Ah—“

Seongwoo took a deep breath. Unconsciously, earlier he had scrunched his body and gripped his own hands so tightly his knuckles turned white. His breath was shallow and a sheen of perspiration layered his forehead. He was cold sweating—his body felt chilled as his heartbeats quickened. Seongwoo shuddered, but tried his best to regulate his breath and heart rates.

 

“Don’t worry to much,” Jihyo patted his back. She knew about his anxiety, though she couldn’t acted nosy—she tried before, but it ended backfire as Seongwoo was retreating: building defences and fiercely closed up his heart. 

 

“Mmm,” Seongwoo nodded.

 

“And I think it would be better if you also warn Kang Daniel-ssi about this _sasaeng_.” Jihyo using her serious tone, “He would working on the set as well, so don’t keep him in the dark for the matter.”

 

“…okay,” Seongwoo nodded again, “I’ll tell him.”

 

* * *

 

It was still a week away, but Seongwoo’s birthday was approaching closer. Daniel was pondering hard about his lover’s birthday gift. He wanted to celebrate the special day, but he didn’t know if they got a day off on the 25th of August—both of him and Seongwoo could possibly got a sudden job on their schedule.

 

Tapped his fingers onto the surface of the table, Daniel made a long _hmmmmm_ as he frowned. He hated that he didn’t have any memory about what gifts he had gave to Seongwoo before. Or if he already prepared a gift for this year. 

 

He lost his memory around mid-July, quite a long period of time before Seongwoo’s birthday date, so he didn’t think that he had bought something yet. But still, it was a possibility that he ordered something special—custom items took time to create and it was possible for him to pampered his lover with such lavish order. 

 

After all from Seongwoo’s story, he even ordered their gemstone rings to be personally handmade by one of his artisan friend and the whole order period was taking almost half a year in advance, since the gemstones and the setting of the rings are very special. Did he already order another thing for Seongwoo’s birthday gift? Daniel had checked his emails and bank book’s expenses for the whole year 2019 from January to July, but there were some stuffs he couldn’t figured out. Not all of his expenses’s information was printed on the list, and there were also a possibility that he hadn’t paid the order in full payment yet.

 

He had asked Jisung, but the older male replied that he had no idea. “You never told anyone about the gifts you get for Seongwoo, Niel,” Jisung told him, “You always try to make it a surprise.”

 

“So I didn’t tell you anything about my plan for Seongwoo’s gift?”

 

Jisung shook his head, “No. Not at all.”

 

“Is it possible if Youngsik Hyung knew something about it?”

 

“I doubt it,” Jisung answered after thinking for a while, “You didn’t even tell me, so I doubt that you’ll tell Youngsik Hyung.”

 

“Ahhhhh—“ Daniel ruffled his own hair in frustation, “I really have no idea what to give…” He wanted to give something that Seongwoo would like, love even. He also want the gift to be useful. It would be even better if Seongwoo could use it on daily basis, so the older male could remember Daniel whenever he see the gift.

 

“Just give him accessories or clothes, then?” Jisung suggested. Daniel sighed, “But I want something really special…”

 

Hearing the younger’s reply, Jisung really want to yell _Aish, this kid! Losing memory or not losing memory, he’s still a fool in love, so annoying!_ and smack the latter’s forehead a thousand times, but he held back. “Then, did you order something special yet?”

 

“….not yet, I think?”

 

“Or you already know what to give Seongwoo, then? Is it available on the store? Do you want to handmade something?”

 

“I don’t know either…”

 

“…”

 

Jisung really want to pound his own chest. This conversation made him tired. He felt like a poor, working-to-the-bone head eunuch whom attending a pig-headed emperor. _Ish! Ordering something also need time, you know! The birthday is next week, do you have the time to be so indecisive like this ah??_ Jisung was telling himself: _Patient. Be patient…_

 

“You only got a week to find something, you know,” Jisung finally said, totally gave up to offer some options to Daniel. Daniel repeated his long _hmmmmm_ and frowned, “I’ll try to find something.”

 

“Soon.”

 

“I know.” 

 

If else fails, maybe wrapped himself with a ribbon and cheekily said “I’m your present…!” wasn’t a bad idea. Jisung made an _eeeww_ face when Daniel told this before, but maybe it was TMI for the older male. Daniel was sure that Seongwoo won’t mind. But still—he wanted to give something special to Seongwoo. He already gave him a ring, so a second ring would be out of question if it wasn’t more special than the first one. 

 

_What should I gave him?_

 

* * *

 

The dentist clinic wasn’t one of Daniel’s favourite places, at all. He despise his visitations to the dentist, especially for the terrifying whirring sounds and the ban of sweets the dentists usually gave him. Yet, healthy teeth is one of basic necessities not only for idols but also for being a decent human being, so Daniel followed the schedule cooperatively.

 

He was sitting there on the private hall of the clinic along with Jisung. Youngsik Hyung was filling their patient cards on the receptionist desk. Daniel fished out his phone and opened a game app—the current game asked for an update, so Daniel complied and downloaded the newest patch. After a few minutes, the game was finally loading.

 

On the home screen, the female sprites wearingKorean traditional hanbok, sitting on a _dolsot_ rock bowl. Her outfit was colourful and vibrant, accompanied with a celestial robe in the same palette of colours. The healer class character greeted him, and Daniel tapped on his daily quest and event buttons. There was a new event starting yesterday—there was a cutout avatar of the game’s Hani Sunbae from EXID holding his chopsticks plastered along with the chibi avatars of the food spirits on the event information tab. The senior singer had been the game’s spokesperson for a few years, providing the game with a Korean’s exclusive OST song for the Korean version.

 

Jisung was going first, so Daniel busied himself by completing his daily task. His team battled against the enemies, scary looking monsters called the fallen angels. It was later when he finished all of his tasks and mission, his stamina was spent out in the process—Jisung wasn’t finished his session yet and Daniel felt so bored.

 

Just as he yawned ungracefully, a familiar sound called his name, “Niel-ah?”

 

Daniel blinked. 

It felt like a scene on a movie, progressed in a dramatic slow motion. Seongwoo was wearing a light coloured buttoned up shirt and a dark denim pants, his hair was unstyled—those raven locks fell onto his forehead. The latter wasn’t using any make up; the black surgical mask was hanging under the older male’s sharp shaped jawline.

 

“You’re here too?” Seongwoo asked him, eyes sparkled as he was smiling to his lover. He wanted to sit beside Daniel, but then he realized the dumb expression plastered on the blonde haired’s face. “What’s wrong—?”

 

Daniel blinked again.

Slowly, he took Seongwoo’s hand—his fingers circled the older male’s wrist, rubbed it several times, made some circle gestures around the thin wrist as if he was measuring something. Seongwoo was confused, “Niel?”

 

“Oh,” Daniel raised his gaze to meet Seongwoo’s, he seemed like he was just awoken, “You are real.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“For a second there, I thought that you’re a fairy. Or an angel,” Daniel said those embarrassing things so easily, yet it was Seongwoo who suffered the second hand embarrassment greatly. He wanted to refute, but Daniel smiled widely—almost a grin, “You know, for a while there I thought I was daydreaming. Seeing you like a fatamorgana—since I missed you too much.”

 

The crimson hue on Seongwoo’s cheeks reddened. “Niel-ah…!” His tone was scolding the younger male, but there was a smile formed on Seongwoo’s lips as well. He plopped himself beside Daniel, “Seriously ah, you are so cheesy.”

 

Their shoulders met, and Seongwoo sighed. He felt relief. It wasn’t all of the sudden—being with the younger male always somehow relaxed him, giving him a sense of security and stability. Seongwoo’s mind was chaotic since a few days ago, due the stalker incident. He was figuring out how to tell Daniel about the _sasaeng_ fan, but he couldn’t do it via the phone—so he tried to match his off time with Daniel so he could meet the latter face to face. Yeah, he was swapping his dentist schedule so he could meet Daniel, that’s why the younger was so surprised to see him today.

 

Seongwoo was leaning to Daniel’s side, contemplating. Sensing the older male’s mood, Daniel finally asked. “What is it?”

 

Seongwoo tilted his head, tried to conveyed the story as simple and direct as possible. “Well, you see…”

 

“Oh, what a coincidence…!”

 

A sudden exclaim came out of nowhere. Someone dashed to their side, and Seongwoo’s eyes widened. He felt a chill down his spine. The girl in front of them were smiling so cheerfully, looked absolutely harmless—but it was just a facade. The _sasaeng_ fan was wearing a one piece white dress under his denim jacket. She ruffled the wrinkles on her dress before plopped on the seat beside Seongwoo, “So you visit the dentist today as well…!” She leaned forward, and Seongwoo immediately scooted back in response, moved himself closer to Daniel’s side.

 

His hands clasped on Daniel tight, and the blonde idol could felt that Seongwoo was trembling beneath his calm expression. He noticed something was off right away. His lover wasn’t smiling, looked rigid as he was covering Daniel from the girl’s sight—as if he was shielding him from her.

 

Daniel wanted to asked Seongwoo, but then his eyes met the girl’s. Those eyes were eerily scary, looked unfocused, yet intently stared at Seongwoo, “It’s me, Seongwoo-ya. Why didn’t you say something back to me…?”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you guess the game and the character on the game's home screen? LOLZZ  
> I'm playing the international version. Fun fact: the international and the Korean title was different LOLZ.
> 
> Btw, yeah that last part (exclude the sasaeng part) was a shoutout to supposedly OngNiel's dentist date LOLLLLZZZZ
> 
> P.S. Happy Lunar New Year for you guys who celebrate the day~~!
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	31. An Attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The MMO idol patted Seongwoo’s arm to calmed the latter and again, used his body to hide Seongwoo from the woman’s view. 
> 
> Chae Sook Hee’s eyes narrowed after witnessing the gesture.   
> “You are annoying,” She rudely pointed towards Daniel, “I’m speaking with Seongwoo, you are interrupting our conversation…!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~~!!  
> It's another Monday morning, and that means another update~~Enjoy~! :D
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. Jisung said that they chatted daily on their group chat after the disband and MY KOKORO I CANNOT--  
> /hhhhhhhhhh I MISSED THEM BEING TOGETHER. MORE COLLABS JUSEYOOOOOO

 

* * *

 

Daniel’s first instinct was to take Seongwoo away from the woman.

He didn’t knew who is this strange woman, but Seongwoo’s reaction towards her was strange—his lover initially looked startled and worried when he saw the white dressed woman. Seongwoo’s face looked calm, but his body language betrayed him. Daniel could feel how Seongwoo’s hand trembled, clasped tight on his fingers.

 

Moreover, this woman was behaving rather odd and creepy. She acted like she didn’t see Daniel at all—she didn’t introduce herself, merely sat beside Seongwoo and acted chummy all of the sudden. Her attitude was totally one-sided as Seongwoo didn’t reciprocate her at all.

 

Swiftly, Daniel tapped the home button on his phone and speed-dialled Youngsik Hyung. The call was connected, but Daniel didn’t speak to his phone. Instead, he stood up and pulled Seongwoo behind him, shielding the older male using his body. Youngsik haven’t say any _Yeah, Daniel?_ like he usually do when Daniel asked the woman, “Who are you?” It was a direct and simple question. He wasn’t trying to be rude, but his tone wasn’t polite either. 

 

The woman’s eyes suddenly changed. Her delicate demeanour turned disdainful—filled with hatred. She didn’t reply to Daniel. The MMO idol patted Seongwoo’s arm to calmed the latter and again, used his body to hide Seongwoo from the woman’s view. Chae Sook Hee’s eyes narrowed after witnessing the gesture. “You are annoying,” She rudely pointed towards Daniel, “I’m speaking with Seongwoo, you are interrupting our conversation…!”

 

“Who are you?” Daniel repeated his question. Behind him, the Fantagio actor’s face had turned pale. Daniel could felt Seongwoo’s breath ragged and body slowly shook. Seongwoo held his shoulders, half-hugged his arm, nudged him anxiously. The older male’s fingers felt ice cold. His mind was chaos—he almost froze, just like those moments they were mobbed by the fans years ago during the WANNA ONE early era. Daniel instinctively realized Seongwoo’s bad condition and for a moment there, it’s like he never lost his memories—something inside him urged him to protect Seongwoo. _Don’t let anybody hurt him. Protect Seongwoo. He’s on the edge of a panic attack—_ The knowledge felt so vivid and clear, as his body remembers. It was something ingrained deep inside him, down to his bones and marrow. 

 

Seeing that the sasaeng fan won’t reply to his question, Daniel opened his mouth, “I don’t know who you are, but you are the one who being rude.” Daniel tightened his clasp on Seongwoo’s fingers, his thumb rubbed the latter’s skin as if he was saying _Don’t worry, I’m here. Don’t be afraid, I won’t let her hurt you._ “Do you have any appointment with the dentist? If not, please leave this place.”

 

If looks could kill, maybe Daniel had died a thousand times. Chae Sook Hee glared at him with a piercing hatred. “Niel…” Seongwoo whispered to Daniel, calling the latter’s name. The raven haired didn’t know what to do. They never got any direct sasaeng problem like this before during their WANNA ONE era. Sure, they should have many sasaeng fans before, but no one acted so bodly and approached any of them directly like this. The woman seemed to be not in the correct mind as she delusionally acted as if she was close with Seongwoo.

 

A minute felt like years but as it on cue, right before the woman successfully take something from her sling bag, Youngsik Hyung dashed along with two security guards. Something glint under the neon LED light, briefly seen as she haven’t pulled it completely. “Halt…!” One of the guards said, and Chae Sook Hee’s hands were firmly grabbed. 

 

_Clang!_

 

The Swiss army knife fell onto the marble floor. The knife had been pulled out, and from a glance the guards saw that the tip had beed tampered. A Swiss knife was usually considered a common utensils for emergency use, so many places didn’t take another look for this item when they do a security check. Yet Chae Sook Hee’s blade was different from the usual Swiss Army’s blade. She had sharpened it into a lethal state, even create some jagged sharp ridges on the middle area to multiplied the damage. It would tore the flesh badly, and the ridges made a possibility that the blade would stuck on the victim’s body. 

 

The woman shrieked, tried to struggle free from the guards. However the guards held her and securedly dragged her out from the dentist’s hall. Her screams were still echoing through the corridor, sounded so shrill and violent.

 

“Seongwoo-ya, are you okay…?” Daniel asked the raven haired male. Seongwoo’s face was ashen and pale, cold sweats drenched his skin. He looked fazed—his body trembled while his eyes were unfocused. The raven haired’s fingers were icy cold. His breaths were shallow, then he started to heave. 

 

Realizing Seongwoo’s unstable condition, Daniel scooped his lover into his embrace. Seongwoo’s face was buried on the younger’s chest. “It’s okay,” Daniel patted the latter’s back and rubbed it in circle patterns, “Its okay, Seongwoo-ya. I’m here. Nothing happened.”

 

“…” Seongwoo circled his arms around Daniel and hugged him tight. Daniel keep rubbing the older male’s back, “It’s okay. She’s gone, the guards had taken her away. No one hurt. It’s okay.” He repeated _It’s okay_ like a chant. Took several minutes for Seongwoo to stop trembling. Youngsik watched them with worried eyes. He wanted to call for a nurse, but it was a dentist office and not a hospital. Jisung was better with words, but he was still inside the dentist’s office. 

 

Being a former bodyguard, he wasn’t so great with words. He was trained to be a manager then, but the things he knew was related to business and formal stuffs. To coax or console someone, he didn’t know what to do or what to say. In the end, he was there watching for the two, making sure that no one take any picture—or worse, reporter looking for any dramatic headlines.

 

“It’s okay,” Daniel repeated his words to Seongwoo’s ears. The older male finally muttered a word, “I’m scared.”

 

“It’s okay, she’s gone.”

 

“You—you could been hurt.” Seongwoo’s speech pattern was kinda broken. He was relaying his sentences between hiccups and several pauses. It’s like he was adjusting his inner minds, looking for words, but everything was jumbled when he tried to speak.

 

“I’m not hurt,” Daniel held Seongwoo’s neck and ruffled the latter’s hair gently, “I’m here and I’m okay.”

 

Seongwoo exhaled a deep breath and tightened his hug.

 

* * *

 

**[News] [Exclusive]** A sasaeng fan approached Ong Seongwoo during his visit to Gangnam’s Royal Seoul Dentist. She was holding a modified Swiss army knife and trying to attack when Kang Daniel’s manager rushed in along with the guards. The receptionist explained that during the incident, MMO’s Yoon Jisung and Kang Daniel got an appointment at the dentist—Yoon Jisung was inside doing his treatment while Kang Daniel was waiting for his turn at the hallway. Ong Seongwoo got a later appointment and was waiting for his turn along with Kang Daniel when the sasaeng fan came. 

 

“I don’t really know what happened during the attack, but Kang Daniel’s manager picked up a call after he finished filling the administration and immediately asked for guards’s assistance, saying that a sasaeng fan was inside. The guards rushed in and everything was chaos,” The receptionist told us, “She was kicking and screaming when the guards took her away from the scene.”

 

The sasaeng fan was confirmed as a staff working at Ong Seongwoo’s drama, The Summer’s Constellation. She had reportedly showing up at Ong Seongwoo’s apartment parking lot as well. The director and head staff had taken notice about her wrongdoings and planned to fire her, but she had suddenly stop coming to the set and went MIA. The police had taken her away to the station right after the incident. The evidence, a modified Swiss army knife, along with the footage of the CCTV was already taken along by the police.

Both MMO and Fantagio hadn’t release any statement about the incident.

**[pic]**

 

[+1,283, -32] HEOL!! This is crazy!! That woman is totally sick! (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ ┻━┻

[+560, -1] OMG looking at the pic gave me chills. That modified blade looked lethal. Someone would get seriously hurt if she stabbed using the weapon! 

[+304, -2] It was really scary. She worked as Ong Seongwoo’s drama staff before? OMG that’s so creepy! Thanks God nothing happened on the set!

[+429, -14] Oh nooooooo ㅠㅠ Ong Seongwoo Oppa ㅠㅠ ㅠㅠ I hope he was alright! ㅠㅠ

[+69, -2] Thanks God Kang Daniel was there as well. It was scary to imagine what happened if Ong Seongwoo was alone when the sasaeng attacked him XDXD

[+108, -11] They got no incident with sasaeng fans during their WANNA ONE era. Gosh, it was really terrible to met one directly like that. I hope both of them are okay.

[+357, -4] Any information about this sasaeng/stalker woman? She’s crazy!!!

[+100, -2] Kang Daniel-ssi, thank you for saving Ong Seongwoo!!!

[+259, -11] Maybe it’s kinda appropriate to say this, but what kind of fanfiction material is this. Seriously. I’m so sorry, but it felt so surreal, just like a fiction. I hope Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo was fine after the incident.

 

* * *

 

**ALL I WANNA DO IS WANNA ONE**

 

**Eomma:** Okay

**Eomma:** Let me tell this to you guys before you find out from the media

 

**CloudFairy:** Eh?

**CloudFairy:** What happened?

 

**GulliverMaknae:** Did something happen, Hyung?

 

**Eomma:** To briefly summed: Seongwoo was attacked by a sasaeng fan today

 

**CloudFairy:** WHAT

**CloudFairy:** [shocked emoticon]

 

**Eomma:** Let me finish—

**Eomma:** So today me, Niel and Seongwoo visited the dentist

**Eomma:** The sasaeng fan came when I was inside the office so I didn’t see the actual scene

**Eomma:** But according to Daniel, she just barged in and acted familiar with Seongwoo

**Eomma:** Seongwoo said that previously that girl came to his apartment as well

**Eomma:** They had informed the drama’s director and head staff

**Eomma:** And they planned to fire her

**Eomma:** But that girl never come to the set anymore and went MIA

**Eomma:** Seongwoo moved his appointment today so he could warn Daniel about her

**Eomma:** THEN SUDDENLY SHE APPEARED AT THE DENTIST AH SO SCARY

**Eomma:** That girl acted like a psychopath

**Eomma:** So Niel called our manager while confronting her

**Eomma:** Thankfully the guards immediately came

**Eomma:** Coz dat girl actually bring a weapon

**Eomma:** [puke blood emoticon]

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** A modified Swiss army blade?

 

**Eomma:** Yeah

**Eomma:** Wait how’d you know, Hwi?

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** It’s on the news already

**CutiePieDaehwi:** [link]

**GulliverMaknae:** ARE YOU GUYS OKAY

**GulliverMaknae:** HYUNG

**GulliverMaknae:** TELL US DAT U GUYS ARE OKAY

 

**Sparrow:** GDI THAT’S SO CREEPY

**Sparrow:** The police won’t release her, right?

 

**Eomma:** Yeah, we’re okay **@GulliverMaknae**

**Eomma:** Niel, Seongwoo and Youngsik Hyung are in the police station right now

**Eomma:** Since they’re the direct witness

**Eomma:** And no, I don’t think that she would get released soon

**Eomma:** Her action was considered as an assault

 

**DarkBae:** That blade was creepy AF

**DarkBae:** She modified it herself??

 

**Eomma:** She is still interrogated by the police 

**Eomma:** She haven’t confessed tho

**Eomma:** But the evidence was too clear

**Eomma:** So I don’t think she could escape from the law

 

**NamjaJihoon:** She need to be punished 

**NamjaJihoon:** [shivers emoticon]

**NamjaJihoon:** Did she want to attack to kill—?

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** I hope it won’t take any toll on Seongwoo Hyung

 

**ManduCheeks:** Maybe it’s not the right time to say this

**ManduCheeks:** But you said that Seongwoo moved his appointment date right

**ManduCheeks:** What if she came today

**ManduCheeks:** Not for Seongwoo

**ManduCheeks:** But for Daniel—?

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** STOP IT AISH

 

**Eomma:** SERIOUSLY DAT TOO CREEPY AH JAEHWAAANNN!!!!

 

**HwangEmperor:** I just read all the comments

**HwangEmperor:** Jisung, I hate to say this but

**HwangEmperor:** What Jaehwan said ^ was one of a possibilty

 

**CloudFairy:** WAIT WHAT

**CloudFairy:** So you are saying that that sasaeng want to attack Daniel??!

 

**HwangEmperor:** It’s a possibilty

 

**Eomma:** WAIT I WILL CONTACT MY MANAGER ASAP

 

* * *

She didn’t get it.

Her prince is prefect; a perfectly sculpted Greek God—an Adonis. He is so busy with his work, Sook Hee had tried her best to be patient. She knew that he is a public figure and couldn’t spare a lot of time for her. But lately, that annoying man came and took all of Seongwoo’s time. Sook Hee hates him. Kang Daniel was riding Seongwoo’s coattail right from the start—and people was so blind to actually voted him as the first rank on that show.

 

Her Seongwoo was far more talented and good looking. She knew that she need to be patient, but that annoying Kang Daniel keep showing around her Seongwoo and her patience finally reached her limit. 

 

That’s why she decided to take matters into her own hand.

 

She need to eliminate Kang Daniel.

 

That way, her Seongwoo would be free.

 

But the police came for her instead.

Seriously, they caught the wrong person! She is innocent. She’s just try her best to protect Seongwoo, to make her Seongwoo happy. 

 

“Miss,” The officer sat across the table tapped the wooden material using his fingers, “Why did you attack Ong Seongwoo-ssi?”

 

Chae Sook Hee raised her face. “Attack my Seongwoo?” Her tone was filled with unbelievable expression, “I won’t ever attack my precious Seongwoo.”

 

“Look, Miss. It was futile to deny the matter. You are holding the blade—“

 

“It’s for the annoying man.”

 

“Eh?”

 

“That blade was for Kang Daniel.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone shocked with the stalker's confession?
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	32. And I am weak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seongwoo could see his own reflections on the latter’s dark orbs.  
> He looked tired. He seemed weak.  
> And I am weak, Seongwoo thought to himself again, self-blaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday Morning, my lovelies~!!  
> I wonder if you guys recognized your own comments on the twitter part of this chapter LOLZ Some of your comment really in line with the comment I intended for the section, so some of them are almost 100% the same ROFLMAO (Am I being lazy? LOLZ) But to my defense, it fitted the purpose of the story so well~~! :D

 

* * *

 

**[KoreanStory] Ong Seongwoo’s Sasaeng Fan Admitted that She Planned to Attack Kang Daniel?!**

 

[Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo’s pictures side by side]

 

An incident caused a storm before as  **one of The Summer’s Constellation’s drama staff turned out to be Ong Seongwoo’s sasaeng fans**. The director and the head staff had released more detailed info about the stalker fan, citing her initial: CSH and she was one of the production staff that supposedly shouldn’t have any contact at all with Seongwoo. However, per Seongwoo’s manager report to the drama crew, the sasaeng fan showed up at Seongwoo’s apartment and acted as if they were friends. Later, CSH didn’t show up at the set and was missing for a period of time before suddenly showed up at a dentist clinic located in Gangnam.

 

She approached Ong Seongwoo there and had preparing a modified Swiss Army’s blade to assault—but during her interrogation she confessed that the blade wasn’t meant for her idol. Instead, she was planning to attack Kang Daniel. Ong Seongwoo was there as well simply because his appointment was pushed forward into the same date with Kang Daniel.

 

[blade pics]

 

CSH targeted the LM Ent. idol because he often met with Ong Seongwoo to practice his acting. The idol was scheduled to  **appear as a cameo** for the drama. CSH stated that their practice time took away Ong Seongwoo’s free time and she simply wanted to liberate Ong Seongwoo from an annoying pest.

The policemen had released the written statement from CSH, reciting her words verbatimly: _“Kang Daniel only using Ong Seongwoo’s fame and acting skills.”_ She implied that Kang Daniel’s action being close with Ong Seongwoo upsets her since it would decreasing her time with the actor.

The psychiatrist had examined CSH after her confession. “She suffered delusional disorder, believing that she was in a secret relationship with Ong Seongwoo. She also showed partial psychopath tendencies, planning to torture anyone that stood on her way.” 

 

In parallel with the medical statement, the police also seized many evidences on CSH’s apartment. Her walls were filled with Ong Seongwoo’s cutout pictures, and there were destroyed cutouts pictures of Kang Daniel as well. Police also find many candid pictures and videos of the two idols, both alone and together on her phone and PC. Several pictures and notes clearly showed that she had tailed Kang Daniel for a few days and learned about his schedule to ambushed him.

 

[pics] [pics] [pics]

 

Both LM Ent. (under MMO) and Fantagio had released a following statement that cited that they will proceed according the law to sue CSH for assault and attempted murder charges.

 

**sources:** [link] [link] [link] [link] [link]

 

 

— Heol! This girl is crazy!! （╬ ಠ 益 ಠ )

— She was delusional. She believed that she was Ong Seongwoo’s GF? And she attacked Kang Daniel because the acting lesson ‘took away their time’? This girl is truly a psycho!!  ಠ 益 ಠ )/

— It was scary. I feel sorry for both Ong Seongwoo and Kang Daniel. Before during their WANNA ONE era, they didn’t have this kind of crazy stalker. At least, no one made it to the headline.

— I wonder if this incident would affect the drama’s production. After all, the stalker was one of the staff. There might be a possibility about another stalker fans among them! OMG this is so scary!

— Crazy sasaeng, leave Ong Seongwoo alone!! ( ∘ ⁼̴ ⃙̀ ˘ ︷ ˘⁼̴ ⃙́∘ )

— Seriously, I felt so bad for Kang Daniel. He was targeted because she stated that the acting lesson took away Ong Seongwoo’s time?? What kind of reason is that! It’s simply illogical!

— Why did the police still covered the sasaeng’s info? Just released them to the public! We need to know her real name and face. She’s one crazy psychopath that had attempted to assault someone, GDI!!  ಠ 益 ಠ )/

— I wonder if she would be put in prison. There was a chance that she might be released, you know? Being “sick” and all since she was not in the correct state of mind?

— OP above ^ it’s a possibility, but I don’t think that they will let her go just like that. I hope that they will lock her up at the mental institution for years and years!

 

* * *

 

**@KoreanStory**

Ong Seongwoo’s Sasaeng Fan Admitted that She Planned to Attack Kang Daniel?! [link]

[pic attached]

**via twitter**

 

**@shfscorpion** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

OMG DAT’S SO CREEPY!!! TT____TTI'M SHIVERING TT____TT

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@danita** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

THAT CRAZY WOMAN!! OMG!!!

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@ageha** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

I just hope both Ong Seongwoo and Kang Daniel are okay TT____TT Sasaeng are too crazy and scary!! XDXD

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@lonelyathena** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

Sasaeng fans are scary o_____o Poor Seongwoo must be in shock about this incident, especially after he heard about the girl trying to attack Daniel!! [shock emoticon]

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@futmop** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

Is Seongwoo alright after that???! [shocked emoji]

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@OngNiel_is_Science10969** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

Seriously, I couldn’t understand why sasaeng think and act like this XDXD This is terrible!!

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@prettysmole** replied to **@KoreanStory**

You know what, this reminded me to someone. Remember the akgae troll that replied to my tweet before? Dat crazy stalker reminded me to **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** , seriously.

||

**@prettysmole**

Here’s the screenshot of her tweets:

**_@00Seongwoo1stFan00_ ** _replied to_ **_@prettysmole_ ** _and_ **_@irene2005_ **

_Kang Daniel isn’t an actor. I don’t think he will have a good skill to appear as a permanent role. It is too much to use Ong Seongwoo over and over again for his selfishness._

||

**@prettysmole**

Here’s another screenshot of her tweets:

**_@00Seongwoo1stFan00_ ** _replied to_ **_@irene2005_ **

_WANNA ONE disbanded for a reason. What? Kang Daniel didn’t want to lose attention since he wasn’t the center of that temporary group anymore? Is that why he used Seongwoo’s archievement to gain a role in the drama? He really carved for attention, eh?_

||

**@prettysmole**

And then **@ageha** reminded us that **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** is a spam side account.

**_@ageha_ ** _replied to_ **_@leinad_ ** _and_ **_@GalacticIdol_ ** _and_ **_@irene2005_ **

_Just checked_ **_@00Seongwoo1stFan00_ ** _profile. It’s just a spam side account. Never post anything, just attacking another person’s posts. No need to talk with this account, the person is obviously a troll._

||

**@prettysmole**

This account **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** never post anything and all the account do is just attacking another account’s posts. It’s a possibility that this person is NOT only an akgae fan, but also a sasaeng (?) I don’t claim that **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** is the same person with CSH, but you guys get what I mean, right?

**via twitter**

 

**@dafdaf** retweet-replied to **@prettysmole**

WAIT. What kind of crazy coincidence is this. THIS IS TOO SCARY!! What if **@00Seongwoo1stFan00** is the same person with CSH?? o______o

[Prettysmole Thread Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

“Seongwoo-ya, are you okay…?”

 

The question sounded so distant and fuzzy. It was like there’s a filter that reduce any noise to his ears. His head was throbbing, and Seongwoo felt faint. His heart beats so fast that it drummed against his ribcages—it felt uncomfortable, almost hurt. He tried to breathe, but he didn’t do a great job with it. His breaths went shallow and it was getting harder to even inhale any air.

 

“Seongwoo…!”

 

Someone shook his body. Trembling, Seongwoo raised his head. His eyes still unfocused, there was this dark filter in his sight; everything was swirling and moved upside down. Despite the cold sweats that practically bathed his body; formed those giant beads on his temples, he felt so chilled. It was freezing cold. Seongwoo started to shivering, teeth chattered.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…!”

 

Someone called his name again. _Who…? Who is it…?_ He wanted to talk, he wanted to ask. But he couldn’t. He tried to speak, but words were trapped inside his throat. He couldn’t even produce any noise. _No, no. I’m afraid—_

 

“I’m here…!”

 

All of the sudden, that same person took him into his embrace. Seongwoo could felt the latter’s warmth, enveloped him like an invisible blanket. He could felt the soothing caresses the other person gave him, repeated patterns on his back. “It’s okay,” The tone was gentle and patient, “Don’t be afraid. I’m here. Everything is fine.”

 

Seongwoo opened his mouth, wanted to reply the encouragement—but he couldn’t find any words. He closed his mouth, opened it again, then closed it again. _I’m gaping like a goldfish_ , he thought to himself. Those hands still enveloped him, patted his back non-stop, and Seongwoo buried his face onto the latter’s shoulder.

 

It was wide and warm, giving him a sense of security and stability. It felt so familiar. He felt safe. Seongwoo tried to mumble something, silently inhaling the latter’s scent. It smelled like cotton, musk and sandalwood mixed with fresh pines. It smelled so fresh and soothing, and Seongwoo couldn’t help to think _So you didn’t use your old coconut scent anymore, eh…?_

 

Then, Seongwoo blinked.

 

All of the sudden, the fog inside his brain cleared. He recognized the man who embraced him. The blonde male still repeating his gentle words, low voice tickling Seongwoo’s earlobe. Daniel got a bigger frame than him, so the younger male easily held him on the lap, rocking their bodies gently; swaying him like someone gently lulled a baby to stop crying and sleep.

 

“Daniel,” He finally called the younger’s name. His voice sounded weird, almost strained. All of the sudden he felt so tired. He wanted to close his eyes and sleep. And sleep. And never wake up. But then the younger male slowly moved—a worried expression pasted on the MMO idol’s face, eyebrows furrowed, and as he asked _“How do you feel?”_ Seongwoo could see his own reflections on the latter’s dark orbs. 

 

He looked tired. He seemed weak. _And I am weak_ , Seongwoo thought to himself again, self-blaming. Daniel looked so worried. Seongwoo went into his panic mode right after the police informed him about the sasaeng’s confession. 

 

_“What do you mean with the blade was meant for Daniel—?”_ _Seongwoo’s eyes widened, “WAIT. She tried to attack Daniel? The blade—“_

 

It was followed by moment of blackout for Seongwoo. He went pale, and his body started to showed the signs of shock. Daniel immediately called his name, almost frantic, yelling for paramedics. He didn’t want to see the older male like this: panicked and agitated. He want the latter to be happy and carefree, laughing and joking, smiling as those obsidian eyes crinkled into two twin crescents.

 

The paramedic hadn’t reached yet, but thanks God that Seongwoo finally wake up from his anxiety frenzy. The latter’s complexion was still pale, but at least he could communicate at the moment. Daniel asked Youngsik and the police officer, “Could you guys leave us alone for a moment? But please tell the paramedic to come soon…”

 

They nodded, and left the room. After the door was closed with a _click_ , a silence followed. The _tick tick_ sound from the round generic clock hanged on the wall suddenly felt so loud and noisy. “Daniel,” Seongwoo finally said something, “I—“

 

“If you’re suggesting that we should break up because of this stupid incident, I won’t agree.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....I'm still waiting for Daniel. He's been missing these days TT_____TT  
>  I wonder about the malicious comments addressed to him and Jisung, seriously ah why did some people just couldn't be kind and really need to be mean.... /hugs Niel and Jisung/
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	33. It’s Okay If It’s You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the first time ever, Seongwoo let his guards down.  
> He let Daniel found his weak self. 
> 
> _I won’t mind if it’s you_ , he thought back then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!!  
> How's your weekend? I hope you guys got a blast during the weekend~~ ^^
> 
> Our favourite eomma, Yoon Jisung's album was released~!  
> Have you guys listened to [Aside](https://open.spotify.com/album/1wElYeEY3u54UN95k6tSAG?si=_M8xDAPoSi6NoY3FoGEelg) yet? :D
> 
>  
> 
> Btw, I posted an extra chapter (that no one asked for) as well, so don't forget to check it out~!! ^^b

 

* * *

 

 

The lightning on the set suddenly felt more dazzling than usual.

There was something in the air that keep every crew member on their edge—excited and anticipating. The buzzing and chatter noises filled the place, and Seongwoo helplessly remembered the same thing happened a lot in the past as well. 

 

It was obviously the very same drama set and the same drama crews, but the air was somewhat different. Some other staffs that usually didn’t present themselves joined the set as well. Some of the girls looked happy, stealing some glances on the tall figure sat near the corner of the set. The make up artist Noona was doing the last retouch of Daniel’s make up—the idol was wearing his outfit for his role as Young Jin. 

 

The costume was a standard piece of white buttoned shirt, a dark suit pants with matching suit jacket. The model was ordinary, something that would be mass produced and cheaply made—something fitting for a company rookie. But as the people said that good looking people would still looking good even in rags, Daniel made the suit adorned his body looked elegant and expensive looking.

 

His blonde hair had turned into a more copper brownish one nowadays—it was swept partially to the side. Some of the bangs were pushed back, but the half part was styled into a comma style. They had accented his brow and eyes—carefully not overdone the eyeshadow as Young Jin was a mere salary man, not an idol. His lips were dabbed using a hint of pink, looked natural against his fair milky complexion. The make up Noona complimented his skin, and Daniel smiled as he thanked her back.

 

Seongwoo couldn’t help to feel the jealousy surged inside him as he witnessed the innocent smile dazzled the staffs there. He wanted to be selfish and announced that the smile should only belongs to him as Daniel was his—but his rationality kept Seongwoo sane enough to swallowed the negative feelings down. _It couldn’t be helped, heh._

 

Daniel got this charisma; something that saturated within that alluring people naturally. Netizen often commented about Daniel’s two famous side: his puppy-like happy go lucky side everytime he was off stage and his sinful devilish charm that released so much seduction whenever he was on stage—but Seongwoo knew that Daniel’s charms applied to both sides of him. People would be attracted to him nevertheless, no matter which side Daniel showed them.

 

_You’ll bewitched no matter what_ , Seongwoo thought, _Just like I did._

 

During their Produce 101 era, people know him as the joker—the clown, the mood maker, the one who would eased the tense atmosphere of the competition by making people laugh. His efforts made people think that he was a funny, out-going person. But truthfully, being a true Virgo, deep down he was sensitive fellow, unusually filled with melancholy. His older sister always told him, _you are thinking too much, Seongwoo-ya._

 

Well, he just couldn’t help it. He may acted cheerful on the surface, but deep down he was anxious and vulnerable. He didn’t want people think that he was weak, so he acted tough and witty instead. Meeting so many new people that he didn’t know like that took a toll on him as he was an introvert, it was exhausting to act so sociable all of the sudden like that. It felt awkward. He felt so nervous, didn’t know what to do. Since he acted so confident and rather cocky during the audition, most members didn’t approached him at all. Because of it, he didn’t assimilate well in the beginning with his fellow A group’s members—and he was so stressed out that he couldn’t memorize the difficult and fast tempo choreography in such a short period of time. His days were hard and he often cried alone, hiding from everyone.

 

Then, they adjusted the class after the re-evaluation. Daniel joined the A class. Seongwoo remembered it well—the boy with broad shoulders and a head full of fluff pink peeked through the door. A wide smile was plastered on his face. This newcomer attracted so many members around him effortlessly.

 

Seongwoo didn’t remember how, but the two of them ended up stuck together a lot. It was fun and easy being with Daniel. For Seongwoo back then, the younger male felt like a ray of sunshine. Spending his time with Daniel felt so natural, just like breathing. The younger male would listen to him—listen to whatever he said, no matter how trivial they are. Daniel didn’t give him flowery words back then, but he did listen. He stayed by Seongwoo’s side. And no matter how lame Seongwoo’s joke is, Daniel will laughed; he laughed like it was the funniest thing he ever heard.

 

His former self used to build so many walls around himself, masking himself with sociable masks plastered on his face and tried his best to follow the norm’s expectation. He didn’t want to get hurt, he didn’t want to be ostracised. But being with Daniel, he didn’t need to pretend. He could be himself. It felt so comfortable. It was like Daniel broke his walls of defence, slowly but sure. Seongwoo panicked back then—he didn’t want to blatantly presented his most vulnerable side to Daniel. 

 

But again, he thought: _It’s Daniel._ The one with the charming smile. The one who always laughing so brightly, who often putting his hands around Seongwoo’s shoulder so naturally. The one who always stay by his side, never judging. The one who made Seongwoo think that it was alright to be himself. The one who made Seongwoo felt so complete. For the first time ever, Seongwoo let his guards down. He let Daniel found his weak self. _I won’t mind if it’s you_ , he thought back then.

 

He was thinking the same thing when the younger male not so secretively joined their hands together, hooked their fingers into one—clammy hands with loud heartbeats and crimson hue dusted their cheeks. He didn’t pulled himself out when Daniel leaned closer, put his forehead against his—the latter’s temperature felt too warm, almost boiling when he ditched his usual _Hyung_. Instead, the younger male whispered his name. _“Seongwoo-ya…”_ The tone lingered, and the soft lips met with his. Slowly nibbled, kneading, prodding for permission. It was sweet and clumsy and almost awkward, but Seongwoo let him. He didn’t pulled himself away from the situation. He gave himself in, surrendering himself.

 

_It’s you._

_It’s okay if it’s you._

 

Of course, it wasn’t always sunshine and daisy.

 

It was another blank on Seongwoo’s part: he didn’t know since when he started to get all the negative thoughts. He became so paranoid. His bad habit of overthinking everything came back like a curse. It was maddening. It was tiring. He hates himself for dragging Daniel down. He despised himself for repeatedly hurts Daniel in the process.

 

_I’m toxic._

_I’m TOXIC._

_I need to let go._

_I need to set him free._

 

He build those walls again. These time, he didn’t let Daniel tore them down. He pushed the younger male away. He became the thorn on roses, aporcupine—blindly hurting people who reached for him, using defence as his excuse. _It’s for Daniel’s sake_ , he told himself. It was a lie. A terrible lie. In the end, his foolishness almost cost him his relationship with Daniel.

 

But Daniel came back.

 

The younger male came back to him, declared that he loves him no matter what. _With or without my memories_ , he said. And again, Daniel tore down his walls of defence. The younger male embraced him for he is. Daniel kept telling him that everything will be okay, everything will gonna be fine. 

 

_“If you’re suggesting that we should break up because of this stupid incident, I won’t agree.”_

 

Daniel’s tone was firm when Seongwoo almost picked up another excuse to sever their ties. The older male wanted to reason with him, but Daniel rejected all of Seongwoo’s _‘what if’_ s. “They called _‘what if’_ for a reason,” Daniel hugged him, voice low yet clear, ringing on his ears, “They haven’t happened yet. And I will make sure so your _‘what if’_ cases won’t come true.”

 

Those eyes were bright. Those eyes trusted him. Seongwoo could see the latter’s souls through the honest gaze. _I’m giving myself to you, Seongwoo-ya_ , those onyx-like dark eyes said to him, _So please trust me and give yourself in return to me._

 

_“Do you trust me?,”_ Daniel asked him at that moment, and Seongwoo only need a couple of seconds before he finally replied:

 

_“Yes.”_

 

So here they are now.

 

The drama set for The Summer’s Constellation. It was a week after the incident. Daniel’s acting practice schedule had come to the end and now the time to shoot their scenes. Seongwoo was wearing his outfit for the shoot: Tae Woo’s usual shirt and suit pants. It was rather quick to be dressed and got his make up done as his make up and styling staffs had done the process hundreds of times before. Seongwoo adjusted his tie, making sure that it wasn’t crook—then he felt Daniel’s gaze on him.

 

He raised his sight, and their eyes met. The younger male adjusted the buttons on his cuffs as he smiled—the very same eye-smiles that made Seongwoo fell in love with him at the first place. Seongwoo loves how those lips curled up into a wide, carefree smile. “Are you ready?” Daniel asked as he approached Seongwoo—actually it was a funny question since it should be him whom asked Daniel the question, the younger male was the cameo afterall. But nevertheless the older male felt his heart went tender, filled with affections for his lover as he smiled back and replied:

 

“Yes.”

 

_I’m ready._

 

* * *

 

**ALL I WANNA DO IS WANNA ONE**

 

**CloudFairy:** How’s **@BlackCat**?

 

**Niellie:** I’m fine :)

 

**CloudFairy:** I’m asking Seongwoo, Niel 

**CloudFairy:** [laugh emoticon]

 

**Niellie:** Um, it’s me

**Niellie:** I’m using Niel’s phone

 

**CloudFairy:** Okay, pls forget that I even ask

**CloudFairy:** I’m not ready for this PDA attack

 

**Niellie:** We’re not displaying any PDA though?

 

**GulliverMaknae:** ^Is this Niel Hyung or Seongwoo Hyung speaking? 

 

**Niellie:** It’s me

 

**ManduCheeks:** LOLZ no PDA 

**ManduCheeks:** Yeah right

**ManduCheeks:** You two are literally showing the lovey dovey now

 

**Niellie:** But why?

**Niellie:** I mean I just borrow his phone to chat

 

**CloudFairy:** See

**CloudFairy:** Another PDA

 

**DarkBae:** It’s PDA because you are showing off that you’re so close at the moment

**DarkBae:** Using one phone to chat and everything

 

**Niellie:** But it’s coz I left my phone with Jihyo Noona

**Niellie:** My battery just died, so no can do

 

**CutiePieDaehwi:** Excuses~

**CutiePieDaehwi:** [smirk emoticon]

 

**Niellie:** Not you too, Hwi

**Niellie:** [frown emoticon]

**Niellie:** Wait

**Niellie:** Daniel’s stickers collection isn’t fun

**Niellie:** Niel, you didn’t have any beside the LINE friends series??

 

**NamjaJihoon:** Seongwoo Hyung

**NamjaJihoon:** You didn’t need to type that here

**NamjaJihoon:** I mean you can talk directly to him

**NamjaJihoon:** Niel Hyung is right beside you right?

 

**Eomma:** Anyway

**Eomma:** It’s the shooting day!

**Eomma:** Good luck, my kids!

**Eomma:** Do your best and break a leg~!

 

**Sparrow:** Wait

**Sparrow:** WHY THEY NEED TO BREAK A LEG??

**Sparrow:** [shocked emoticon]

 

**HwangEmperor:** …it’s a saying, Woojin-ah

**HwangEmperor:** Not literally

 

**Sparrow:** Oh

 

**ManduCheeks:** It means ‘Good Luck’ in theatrical slang

 

**Niellie:** Okay

**Niellie:** Wish me luck~!

 

**GulliverMaknae:** ^Is this Niel Hyung or Seongwoo Hyung speaking? 

 

* * *

 

The camera followed him and Young Jin’s colleagues from the lift, all the way to the receptionist desk. The director of the drama was used in theatrical drama production, and he preferred his actors to act in one go instead of doing several shots for a scene. To capture the fluidity and the close up shots at the same time, he used many cameras—each cameramen got a job to capture their assigned shot. Too many footages is better than lacking any footages, after all. Thanks to these methods, the editing team got loads of angle shots to play with; this was also one of the reasons why the drama managed to be one of the popular ones during the season.

 

Daniel tried to ignored all the cameras, imagining that he was Young Jin. _Do it just like we’ve practiced before_ , he told himself. He tried to put himself in Young Jin’s shoes. Of course, at the same time he made sure that he followed the camera and showed them his best angle and expression. He did it naturally—camera awareness had been one of his forte. His body remembered how to, and Daniel just followed his instinct.

 

They walked though the corridor, the long passage really looked like the real deal, complete with pillar and everything. The interior was designed to be sleek and monochrome, with a hint of polished red wood accent. Their leather shoes made some _tap tap tap_ noises, sounded like soldiers marched together.

 

Daniel knew that one of the camera was dedicated for his close up angle, so he made an expression of slightly excited yet nervous at the same time. He had practiced this look over and over again with Seongwoo, and at the moment he perfectly showed the giddy expression of a rookie. He was there with his team—this is his first big job, with big client and they need this deal. He was happy to be included to the team yet he was afraid that he would make a mistake that cost them the pitch.

 

Young Jin’s eyes darted all around the office before he tried to focus. Daniel tried to imagined how he would felt back there during his Produce 101 entry. It would be easier if he got his memories, but sadly he didn’t have any recollection of it—so Seongwoo had made him watched the re-run of the show. Daniel watched himself and his MMO squad, observed how he acted back there, and tried to imagine what he was thinking during the audition. He applied those to Young Jin’s role.

 

The team stopped in front of the receptionist area. Being idle, Young Jin stared at the office’s interior details. He pursed his lips, and one of his senior gave him a nudge. Young Jin made an apologetic gesture and tried to look dignified—straightened his back and inhale a deep breath…

then the door opened.

 

Someone came out from the door, noticed the team. Seongwoo, as Tae Woo, looked rather haggard. During this scene, Tae Woo had spent several days doing overtime as his team got a huge project. He looked tired and sleepy. But then, his eyes widened. Tae Woo blinked, recognizing someone. He didn’t break into a huge smile, but he looked rather happy nonetheless.

 

“Young Jin…?” He called, and the youth beamed back at him with a wide grin—almost ear to ear. “…Hyung…!”

 

* * *

 

 

Here's a bonus for you guys:

Taken from Seongwoo's ELLE Interview

Translated by [ong_supremacist](https://twitter.com/ong_supremacist/status/1098524005525409792)  
Check out the whole interview:  **[[1]](https://twitter.com/ong_supremacist/status/1098524005525409792) [[2]](https://twitter.com/ong_supremacist/status/1098596106592796676) [[3]](https://twitter.com/ong_supremacist/status/1098638707031040000)**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's an extra chapter this week, don't forget to check it out as well~! ^^
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	34. [EXTRA] Kang Young Jin and Kim Tae Woo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An extra about Kang Young Jin and Kim Tae Woo's story.  
> Taken from Young Jin's POV, from their first meeting until the reunion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I need to give these characters some love as well LOLZ  
> I put quite a back story for them, and it might help to grasp the characters's relationship as well--since our beloved Niel and Seongwoo were playing the characters ^^b
> 
> Enjoy~!!

 

* * *

 

 

Kang Young Jin first met Kim Tae Woo during his first year of university.

It was the first day of the new semester. March’s weather was cool and serene, with vast blue sky and slight breeze that carried a bit of sweet scent of the spring’s flowers. It was so cliche it felt like a scene from a shoujo manga: Young Jin lost his way to the school auditorium hall. 

 

Different from another common university’s layout, their university auditory hall was located in the middle of the central building. There were several staircases that leads to the hall, the mismatch floor plan was the result of the district’s expansion from the old building. They didn’t demolish the old building, instead annexed them and mixed the newer one with the previous structure. One of his older cousin attended the university before, and told him the supposedly fastest shortcut to the hall—so he separated himself from the crowd and took the route, only to found the stairway was sealed using a locked rail door. He went back to the entrance hall, but there were no one when he reached the place—he was so late and he couldn’t find his way to the hall. 

 

Sure, the purpose of the new semester gathering was only to welcoming the new students, followed by the briefing of the upcoming Membership Training—but it would be hard to find friends if he didn’t assimilate himself with the crowds quickly.

 

There, he met with Kim Tae Woo. _“Are you lost?”_ was the first question Tae Woo said to Young Jin back then. The upperclassman was wearing a committee band on his arm. It was his job to escort the new students to the hall. Young Jin noticed the band and and quickly nodded. The upperclassman took him to the hall and Young Jin bowed, thanked him before he dashed to his department’s position area. The entrance ceremony was boring and the dean’s speech almost lulled him into sleep, his textbook narrate about the upcoming MT followed the pamphlet words by words. Young Jin covered his mouth and yawned, but then his gaze noticed the upperclassman again.

 

The youth was standing on the side rows, along with the other committee members. His crisp and tidy buttoned shirt, paired with a really jet black soft hair that styled into a comma style give him clean and neat appearance. The latter’s skin was fair, with a pair of strong eyebrows, dark obsidian orbs framed with an almond shaped eyes, a tall aquiline nose, high cheekbones that looked like a Greek sculpture, and a nice looking pale pink lips. This upperclassmen didn’t looked like Korean—his face looked almost western, his face features were sharp and prominent.

 

“Who are you looking at?” One of the students sat beside him excitedly asked, “A pretty sunbaenim? Which one?” and Young Jin just shook his head, “No one.”

 

_Though, sure he is pretty._

 

Young Jin learned the upperclassman name for the first time when he visited the classical instrument club with his friends. He saw the latter sat by the window, the white curtain danced along with the wind. The raven haired male was basking in the sun, the golden hue casted a light of halo on his silhouette. He was hugging a classical wooden guitar, fingers strummed the strings, creating melodious random notes. Those fingers were unusually pretty for a guy, long and slender, mesmerizing with rounded pinkish tip, the nails were well trimmed.

 

“Tae Woo…! Kim Tae Woo…!” One of the senior called his name, “These guys want to apply for the club.”

 

That was the first time Young Jin saw Kim Tae Woo smiled. Those unrestrained smile was so gentle and radiant, his laughs tickled Young Jin’s ears. “Do you guys have any preference for the musical instruments?” He asked then. Young Jin didn’t want anybody to say it first, so he blurted, “I like the guitar…!” He pointed at the guitar on Tae Woo’s lap as he replied.

 

“Have basic knowledge of it? Can you play?” Tae Woo’s face looked happy as he recognized Young Jin’s enthusiasm. “I…” Young Jin hesitated, “I can, but I’m not so good. I can only play a little bit.”

 

“Try playing this,” Tae Woo pulled him to a chair and gave the guitar to him. Young Jin complied and played a few basic keys. “Hmm,” Tae Woo corrected him, “Your position was a bit off. Here, hold it a little bit closer. Yeah, hold it like you’re hugging your lover—“ The sentence made Young Jin blushed.

 

Nevertheless, it did improve the sound he created. Tae Woo moved closer and stood so nearly by Young Jin’s side—the younger male could felt the older male’s body warmth. Using his beautiful fingers, Tae Woo took Young Jin’s fingers and corrected his grip on the strings, “There.”

 

For the first time ever, Young Jin felt a pang of disappointment. He didn’t want the moment of Tae Woo corrected his fingers’s position to end. So he deliberately made another mistake as he changed the chord. “Sunbaenim,” Young Jin pleaded, “I’m so sorry, but please be patient and teach me more…?”

 

Tae Woo just laughed and replied, “Okay.”

 

Later from the female classmate, Young Jin got more detailed info about Kim Tae Woo. The upperclassman was on his third year already. Eventhough he wasn’t the ‘university prince’ like Lee Seo Jun from the business and public relation department, Kim Tae Woo was famous for being the IT Department’s idol prince. He was gentle and refined, excelled in his study, and his looks was fascinating. 

 

Too bad for the majority of the females, it said that Kim Tae Woo already have a girlfriend—she was his childhood friends and their relationship was really close. According to the gossip, Tae Woo was really devoted to Hae In; to the point of making the other females really jealous by his dedication.

 

“She’s not that pretty,” Young Jin said one day when one of his friends pointed which girl is _‘the infamous girlfriend of Kim Tae Woo’_. The girl was wearing a white frill off white blouse, paired with a khaki coloured high waisted straight pants. She tied her long hair into a ponytail, dainty earrings dangling on each of her earlobes. Her make up was simple yet meticulous. Everyone else would agreed that Yeom Hae In is the one of the prettiest girl in the university, but there was something about her that… didn’t feel right.

 

“What do you say?!” His classmate widened his eyes, “Man, how high is your standard? Yeom Hae In is one of the primadonna in our uni…!”

 

“She seemed…” Young Jin stared at her, tried to look for the perfect word, “Fake?”

 

“WHAT!”

 

“Seriously, she looked so fake,” Young Jin tried to explain himself, “Not her face or make up. Her attitude. She tried so hard to portrayed herself as a perfect, kind girl. Not a goody two shoes, but kind and delicate. Not a strong headed and opinionated woman, but not a doormat. You know what I mean? That kind of perfectly balanced ‘perfect’—that no real people ever be.”

 

His first impression about Hae In wasn’t great, and later it became worse.

 

Young Jin heard the conversation by accident. He was eating his lunch at the cafeteria when Hae In and her group of friends picked the empty table next to him. In the beginning, Young Jin tried not to pay any attention to the group and tried to focused on his own Wafu pasta and potato salad set meal, then one of the girls mentioned Kim Tae Woo to Hae In. The whole group started to tease her by complimenting her; saying that she was so lucky to have such a great and devoted boyfriend.

 

Then Hae In frowned, angrily stated: “He’s not my boyfriend…!”

 

The cheerful atmosphere suddenly turned into an awkward one. All of the laughter died down and all of the smiles broke into uneasy expression. “Hae In, dont be mad,” One of the classmate tried to apologized, “We didn’t meant to make you upset. But seriously though, Kim Tae Woo is such a great guy—why did you react so strongly like that?”

 

“What’s so great about him?”

 

Hae In’s answer didn’t only surprised her friends, but also Young Jin. It was on his earshot range, so he could hear the disdain tone well. His fork stopped midair. Raised his gaze, he saw the look on Hae In’s face. The contempt was really apparent, created a seething rage inside Young Jin. 

 

“Seriously, he’s so annoying. He had been pestering me since forever,” Hae In rolled her eyes, “Just because we are childhood friends, he acted as if I’m his and keep sticking up to me.”

 

The girls around her didn’t know what to say. _Eh? Isn’t it too harsh? Even though you didn’t like him as a potential lover, you didn’t have to be so mean like that…_

 

Young Jin’s hand turned into a grip, almost snapped the plastic fork in his hand. Being self-proclaimed Tae Woo’s favourite hoobae, Young Jin often looking for him so they can spend some time together, using guitar practice as one of his main excuse. So many times during their practices, it was Hae In whom looking for Tae Woo and asked for some help. And each time, Tae Woo would complied. People even nicknamed him as _‘the loyal dog’_ because of it.

 

Everyone know that Tae Woo never force Hae In to do anything. He was so patient and catered to her needs, often provided her with meals and drinks and snacks, accompanied her to places, sometimes helped her to hold her bags and stuffs. Tae Woo never made any advances and didn’t try to force any physical skinship. Now she spoke about Tae Woo in such tone, didn’t it too cruel and self-justified? It was just too selfish indeed.

 

“If you dislike him so much, then stop visiting our club just to ask him doing stuffs for you.”

 

Young Jin’s tone was flat, but it was loud and clear. Tried to hide his anger, Young Jin put his best effort to display a poker face. On the other hand, Hae In looked really offended. “What do you mean…?” Her eyes asked _who are you anyway?_

 

“If you want to badmouth someone, at least state the truth,” Young Jin shrugged his shoulder, “Don’t be such a wishy-washy selfish bitch that self-justified herself. You said that Tae Woo keep pestering you, but it was you that keep looking for him at the musical instrument club. I was there everytime you called him _‘Oppa’_ and asked for his help, so don’t try to deny it.”

 

Hae In’s face turned scarlet, but Young Jin didn’t feel any remorse. He hated this female with whole of his guts. _You didn’t deserve Tae Woo Hyung!_

 

Before it was awkward, but now the atmosphere was even more unbearable. Hae In’s group froze, didn’t know what to do or what to say. Young Jin ignored them and continued his meal. He leisurely took his time, wanted to see Hae In’s action next. In the end, one of the group nudged Hae In and asked her to find another table.

 

It was Young Jin’s only interactions with Hae In. He never met her anymore. The girl really stop seeking for Tae Woo at the club, so Young Jin secretly felt proud and triumphant about the matter. But then, as Tae Woo was closer and closer to his own graduation, the upperclassman became buzy with seminar and internship. He was rarely visited the club room.

 

“You looked like a kicked puppy,” The other senior of the musical club teased him. Young Jin was clutching the very same guitar Tae Woo used before, fingers strummed the strings, produced several random chords—but they sounded somber and heartfelt.

 

“Don’t tease me ah, Noona,” Young Jin pouted. Despite having a big build and broad shoulders, his face was emitting a childish charm. He did look like a puppy, with invisible dejected flatten ears and slumped tail. The senior laughed, wondered if this cute junior of her knew that he was actually famous between the girls for being good looking. But because of his cheerful and childish behaviour, those girls only see him as ‘little brother’ figure and didn’t considered him as a boyfriend material.

 

“You won’t get a girlfriend like this,” She teased, and Young Jin pouted even more, “Well, I’m not interested in one at the moment.”

 

“But still,” The upperclasman smiled at him, “Tae Woo would graduate soon, you know? Rather than sulking like that, it was better to practice your guitar. We got this tradition playing tribute songs for graduating members. If you want to play something for Tae Woo, this could be your last chance.”

 

“Mmm,” Young Jin slowly nodded, wondering which song he should play for Tae Woo. There was a lot of great songs, but he wasn’t really good at playing the guitar—so his options were kinda limited. “I’ll pick a good one.”

 

Young Jin didn’t meet his beloved hyung again before the very day of the farewell party. It seemed that Hae In didn’t tattle about him as Tae Woo didn’t talk about it at all. The upperclassman patted his head, congratulated him as Young Jin bragged about his final scores for the last semester. Young Jin was happy from the pats, but with a grieve tone he lamented, “I’ll miss you so much, Hyung. I still need you to teach me the guitar…”

 

“Nonsense,” Tae Woo laughed, “You’ve played beautifully…!”

 

Before, during his turn on the stage, Young Jin was playing the guitar while singing a ballad. It wasn’t perfect, both of his guitar technique or his pitch of singing, but he did put his emotions on the song.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _To you, I have been running for a while without a break_

_To you, I have been running in front of you with my eyes closed_

_What I wanted to say with this song is to be brave enough_

_With this song, I hope to be gently handed down for you ♪_ ♫♬

 

He closed his eyes for a moment, then looking for Tae Woo’s face among the crowds. The older male was sitting near the back, leaning against the wall. He was holding the red solo cup, talking to another senior next to him.

 

_I’m here, Hyung._

_This is for you, also for me._

_Please watch me…_

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _Sometimes after I look at the sky_

_It’s not that different again_

_You know, sometimes you smile without any worries,_

_with a bright smile_

_Lean on my shoulder, just like now_

_It’s okay to shed tears_

_Just for a second I want to be at a place to rest for a while ♪_ ♫♬

 

When he reached the climax of the song, Tae Woo made a _‘sssttt’_ gesture to the other senior and pointed to the stage. Young Jin noticed it—he was happy. He sang louder, tried to conveyed his song to Tae Woo.

 

_♪_ ♫♬ _This is not the end,_

_It’s just a comma_

_It just going to stop for a while_

_Don’t be so impatient_

_When you’re having a hard time,_

_take them out again,_

_our precious memories ♪_ ♫♬

 

He didn’t say it out loud, but he dedicated the song for Tae Woo. He also intended the song as a reminder for himself. _This is not the end, it’s just a comma._ Young Jin smiled, though his eyes went misty, “We will meet again in the future right, Hyung?”

 

“Hmm,” Tae Woo nodded.

 

“I’m still your favourite hoobae ever right, Hyung?”

 

Tae Woo laughed for quite a while, but then he nodded solemnly. “Hmm,” He patted Young Jin’s head again, though now they were on the same height, “You are my favourite hoobae.”

 

_We’ll meet again in the future right, Hyung?_

_I meant it when I asked you about it._

 

_I leaned about the lines theories back then during my mathematic class, about those lines that meant to never be together._

 

_My professor told me that Math tells us three of the saddest love stories:_

  1. _Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever_
  2. _Parallel lines who were never meant to meet_
  3. _Asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together_



 

_I despised them._

_I didn’t want it to be us._

 

_I wanted to be tangled with you._

 

_You will be forever my favourite sunbae,_

_and I’ll be forever your favourite hoobae._

 

People said that, if you guys are fated, destiny will bring you together no matter what. Some people called it as serendipity. It means ‘happy accidents’—accidents that meant to happen. Because some people are meant to be together.

 

It was a year of two after his graduation. The very same cousin who told him the shortcut to the auditorium hall recruited him into his company. “You are good with promoting, right?” He asked, and offered him a position with enough salary and benefit that encouraged him to left his shitty admin position at his former company.

 

He was nervous as hell when the crew brought him together to meet one of their client. Young Jin was tasked to be the one who presented the ppt presentation. He couldn’t sleep the night before, afraid that he would make a stupid mistake or blurt the wrong thing in front of their client—making them losing the pitch.

 

His eyes darted around as they entered the building—sleek and modern with open space layout, wood and metal formed vertical lines that accentuate the design well. It looked so beautiful and high class and Young Jin felt almost out of place walking through those corridors along with his sunbaenims.

 

Then, as it was playing in slow motion, someone opened the glass door and walked passed the receptionist table. Young Jin recognized the figure, lean and beautiful with jet black hair and obsidian orbs that paired with a face that seemed like a Greek sculpture. He looked more mature, his features were more chiseled, but Young Jin remembered him nevertheless.

 

Kim Tae Woo seemed to recognized him as well—blinked as he pointed to Young Jin, calling his name, looking for affirmation. “Young Jin…?”

 

And Young Jin suddenly remembered those term again. Serendipity. Happy accidents. Accidents that meant to happen, because some people are meant to be together. And fate won’t be so cruel to place him and Tae Woo like tangent or asymptotes lines theory.

 

“…Hyung…!” He called back, grinning almost ear to ear.

 

_This is not the end,_

_It’s just a comma._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Young Jin played is Yoon Jisung's [Comma / Slow](https://open.spotify.com/track/6NYDUkcW7LR7wLLfTF8uTq?si=BTifmdgGRFSk5vorhWmVIA) from his [Aside](https://open.spotify.com/album/1wElYeEY3u54UN95k6tSAG?si=O7kMHOYiRbaln9NjqK6zsQ) album.  
> I didn't know why some of them titled it as Comma and some of them titled it as Slow--any idea why?


	35. A Memento

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t wanna this to end,” He whined, acted childish for once. He was still cradling his bouquet, one of his arm tugged the hem of Seongwoo’s jacket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!!
> 
> Another week, another chap :3  
> Enjoy ^^

 

* * *

 

Truthfully, deep down Daniel wondered if it was okay for the screenwriter to put Hae In character in such a bad light. After all, she was the heroine, the female lead role. Normally the female lead in such popular drama series like this would be beautiful, kind, witty, with a strength of her own. Though Summer’s Constellation wasn’t a romantic comedy and leaned to the realistic, darker tone, a female lead should be the focus of the story and must be well-liked by viewers.

 

Hae In wasn’t like that. 

 

Sure, she was portrayed as beautiful and strong willed, but some of her characteristics were too contradictive. It was hard to be classified as her attractive ‘flaws’—the traits were judged as annoying by the viewers. Sure, she was hardworking and ambitious, tried her best to do her job, but she was entering the company for revenge at the first place. She worked so diligently it felt wasteful since it would be quicker and easier if she sabotaged the projects to destroy the company, but she didn’t do that. In the beginning it was understandable that she need to act good so she would be promoted to be able to ruin the company once she got enough power to do so, but then Seo Jun came back from overseas and all over the sudden Hae In was put in a dilemma.

 

Seo Jun’s family destroyed her family business and her father attempted suicide because of it, so she vowed for revenge. But then the beloved former crush came along with the picture and Hae In’s will weakened just like that. Hae In’s reasoned that Seo Jun didn’t know about the incident, and she was torn to continue her revenge or stop it altogether.

 

Despite that, she acted so wishy-washy to her childhood friend. Tae Woo loved her for years and supported her even on those darkest years when her family was plunged into the ruins, but she didn’t seem to appreciate it. She took Tae Woo for granted. They had been in a close relationship since elementary years because they lived in the same compound, so she regarded Tae Woo’s affection as something natural. In the beginning, her family was well off and Tae Woo treated her like a princess. She even whined that Tae Woo acted so clingy at her. It was later when the company collapsed and Tae Woo helped her family so many times, her mother forced her to accepted Tae Woo’s feelings. Yet she did this half-heartedly. She didn’t open her heart and told herself that she need to focus for revenge, so she didn’t have enough time and energy for Tae Woo.

 

The netizens were enraged because of it. _It’s a total bullshit_ , one of the review blogs stated, _I pitied the actress since she need to act so heinously for such shallow character._ Some of the viewer, especially Tae Woo’s fans called her fake _white lotus_ or _green tea bitch_ —both means a woman that acts pure and righteous but sly and full of schemes inside. 

 

If it was only Seo Jun and Hae In in the relationship, her traits would be viewed as weak-willed, but still forgivable. Some other titles got the same premise with these kind of plot: the heroine wanted revenge but later hesitated as she got close with the male protagonist. But since The Summer’s Constellation title itself meant that there will be another person between the main protagonists, Tae Woo was put in the mix.

 

This second male lead character was supposedly put for an extra mini conflict to add dynamics to the story, but Ong Seongwoo acted too well and viewers fell in love with the character too much. The producers and the screenwriter added many scenes for him later, and by inserting those scenes Hae In’s character became worse and worse. It made her such an egoistical and wishy-washy character, a cheater that played Tae Woo’s heart.

 

“Won’t it would be even worse with Young Jin’s revelation of their university’s past scenes?” Daniel asked between their takes. He was wearing a navy overcoat, adorning a white hoodie with black abstract lettering splattered all over it beneath. It was Young Jin’s university’s outfit, and to create a contrast between the current and past Young Jin, the stylist used a temporary black hair dye that only need to be sprayed and could be quickly washed later.

 

“Well, the ratings is good and she won’t ended up with Tae Woo nevertheless,” The producer laughed awkwardly. Even with the cliche plot, the drama managed to get an average of 6-7% ratings, with 5.6% at their lowest. It was unbelievably good, and deemed almost impossible in normal circumstances. Yet they were in luck since there were no better series during their airing period. Without any titles acted as their rival, the ratings turned well.

 

They were filming the past scenes—Tae Woo and Young Jin’s scene from the university. Daniel had learned the basic for guitar to act on those scenes. Seongwoo wasn’t good at guitar either, he was good playing drums but guitar or bass wasn’t his strongest skill. Yet during Tae Woo’s scene, Seongwoo managed to acted so beautifuly.

 

“Can you play the guitar, Hyung?”

 

“No, I just winged it,” Seongwoo laughed. He was wearing a cream coloured cashmere sweater, the white buttoned shirt peeked underneath, matched with a black pants and white sneakers. His hair was swept back, revealing his smooth forehead. The make up artist noona had accented his eyebrows and jawlines, making them looked extra defined.

 

_Oh well,_ Daniel thought. _I didn’t dislike Tae Woo and Young Jin’s story though. So maybe it’s fine?_ One thing for sure, he believe that their shippers would have a field day with the background stories and current interactions.

 

* * *

 

**[KoreanStory] Kang Daniel Filmed His Cameo Scenes for The Summer’s Constellation**

 

[short behind the scene video]

 

It was still fresh in our memories about  **the sasaeng stalker incident** involving  **the assault to Kang Daniel** a while ago. MMO had taken legal actions about the matter, and Kang Daniel previously stated that “It was a regrettable incident, but I won’t backed out from the cameo role. Young Jin is a really interesting cameo role and actually own a strong bond with Kim Tae Woo, so I will do my best. Please wait for the character’s appearance in the series.”

 

The filming seemed to be fun and relaxing, with Kang Daniel and Ong Seongwoo joked with each other between the takes. Park Yoo Ri who played Hae In even praised Kang Daniel, stated that he was a hardworker. “He’s so polite and acted well,” The veteran actress nodded, “He even apologized since Young Jin acted rudely to Hae In during one of the past scenes.”

 

Kang Daniel’s cameo character was named Kang Young Jin, Kim Tae Woo’s hoobae from the university. They were in the same instrumental club, and Tae Woo teached Young Jin to play guitar. Young Jin idolized his sunbae and ecstatic when they met again after years—they lost contacts after Tae Woo’s graduation.

 

[Kim Tae Woo promotional poster] [Kang Young Jin promotional poster]

 

A 15 seconds teaser of their scenes went viral yesterday, and became the number 1 trending keywords for several search engines including Naver.

 

[Promotional teaser video]

 

**Source:** [link] [link] [link]

 

* * *

 

**@KoreanStory**

Kang Daniel Filmed His Cameo Scenes for The Summer’s Constellation [link]

[pic attached]

**via twitter**

 

**@ice_flow** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

:DDD Can't wait for the wrap up and everything after the filming for these parts!! :D :D :D

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@lonelyathena** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

I really missed OngNiel so much!! Cannot wait for the cameo scenes :))

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@shfscorpion** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

Please make Tae Woo ended up with Young Jin!! OMG I really hate Hae In—uuuggghhhhhh. Sorry for Hae In’s fans but her chara was soooooo annoying! XDXD

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@meanttobeOng** replied to **@shfscorpion**

IKR! It was just like DramaSpoiler stated about Hae In: “ _It’s a total bullshit_ , _I pitied the actress since she need to act so heinously for such shallow character.”_

||

**@meanttobeOng** replied to **@shfscorpion**

Meanwhile, can we talk about the teaser video. OMG. I. AM. SCREAMING. //////////

**via twitter**

 

**@Ongcheongie25** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

OMG Young Jin and Tae Woo story is so beautiful!!!! :”"" I’M CRYING OMG HE HUGGED HIM!!!

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@dafdaf** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

HE HUGGED HIM AND SAID “DON’T SEE!” OMG MY HEART I JUST CANNOT //////////

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@lovestruly** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

Pleaseeee let Young Jin and Tae Woo be together!! Uri Tae Woo deserves better than the indecisive Hae In, and that person is Young Jin! Seriously their scenes are so precious ///////////

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

**@OngNiel_is_Science10969** retweet-replied to **@KoreanStory**

WHOA. Hae In was so despicable on that teaser! I really wanna to bitch-slapped her for toying with Tae Woo like that—Young Jin, please took him away from her and make him happy :D

[KoreanStory Post Link]

**via twitter**

 

* * *

 

**Slow/Comma** by **PeachPink89**

Wanna One (Band), The Summer’s Constellation (TV Series)

 

**No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Summer’s Constellation AU, Kang Young Jin/Kim Tae Woo, Angst, Fluff, Angst with Happy Ending, OngNiel is Science, Oneshot, OngNiel, Longing, One Sided Pining, Songfic

 

_This is not the end,_

_It’s just a comma._

((I gave birth to a 10k words monsters OMG))

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 10,429 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

—

**From The Moon To The Stars** by **Stardust1996**

Wanna One (Band), The Summer’s Constellation (TV Series)

 

**Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Summer’s Constellation AU, Kang Young Jin/Kim Tae Woo, OngNiel is Science, Fluff, Eventually Smut, Unbetaed

 

It was their last night. Young Jin’s favourite sunbae, Kim Tae Woo, was graduating. And Young Jin didn’t want it to be their last night.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 8,720 **Chapters:** 2/2

 

—

**But You Never Know** by **TrueScientist**

Wanna One (Band), The Summer’s Constellation (TV Series)

 

**No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Angst, Fluff, Hurt and Comfort, Angst with Happy Ending, Summer’s Constellation AU, Kang Young Jin/Kim Tae Woo, Longing, One Sided Pining, I miss them so much, OngNiel is Science, Unbetaed, Omegaverse, ABO AU, English isn’t my 1st language

 

It felt the greatest cosmic joke ever: An alpha fell for another alpha.

But Kang Young Jin fell for Kim Tae Woo so hard and so deep, he couldn’t fight his own heart.

 

_The future seemed bleak._

_I loved you so, but you never know._

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 3,445 **Chapters:** 1/?

 

—

**Caramel and Macchiato** by **DozenRoses**

Wanna One (Band), The Summer’s Constellation (TV Series)

 

**Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply,** Kang Daniel/Ong Seongwoo, Kang Daniel, Ong Seongwoo, Summer’s Constellation AU, Kang Young Jin/Kim Tae Woo, Fluff, Angst, Oneshot, Coffee Shop AU, Established Relationship, Mutual Pining, OngNiel is Science

 

Kang Young Jin fell in love at the first sight for the beautiful barista behind the counter, with those sweet smile and adorable moles on his cheeks.

 

**Language:** English **Words:** 4,110 **Chapters:** 1/1

 

* * *

 

It took just one day to finished all the scenes.

Daniel felt it was way too short—he wanted more time to be with Seongwoo. He pretended to pout as the older male gave him the flower bouquet, laughing as he thanked him to be able to act as the drama’s cameo. The crews clapped and congratulated him, Daniel bowed to the director, to the screenwriter and the head staffs before bowed again to the staffs on the set.

 

“Thank you everyone,” He thanked everybody present during his scenes, “Thank you for giving me a chance to participate on the drama…!”

 

Daniel had prepared a lot for his role, and finally he had finished his part safely. The director praised him, but Daniel brought Seongwoo’s acting lessons for the reason he did so well during his filming. “I have the greatest coach,” He smiled, eyeing the older male. Seongwoo just rolled his eyes, “No need to flatter me.”

 

In the end, Daniel was still reluctant to leave the set. 

It felt like one of his connections with Seongwoo will ended once he leave the location, since he had finished his role. “I don’t wanna this to end,” He whined, acted childish for once. He was still cradling his bouquet, one of his arm tugged the hem of Seongwoo’s jacket.

 

The older male fished out his phone, “Let’s create a memento then.” Daniel beamed and posed beside Seongwoo; smiled happily to the camera. Series of shutter noises filled the air with its _click click_ sound effect. “You looked so happy,” Seongwoo commented as he checked the photos taken in his gallery, “Let me post this on Instagram.”

 

“Wait,” Daniel took put his phone as well, “Let’s post them on the same time. Now say cheese to the camera, Seongwoo-ya~”

 

It was 5 minutes later when they posted two almost identical photos to their respective instagram accounts. Seongwoo posted a picture of Daniel holding his flower bouquet right next to him, eyes crinkled into a huge smile—he looked like an oversized giant puppy. Daniel posted the picture of him showing his jawline, smiling as he leaned closer to Seongwoo, their faces were centimetres apart, separated only by a stalk of flowers from the bouquet.

 

Beneath the photo, Seongwoo put a caption along with #SummerConstellation tag: _“With my forever favourite hoobae, Kang Young Jin.”_ while Daniel captioned his with _“Kim Tae Woo, my forever favourite sunbae.”_ next to the very same hastag.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda worried with Daniel's current situation ;_____;  
> I really hope the best for him and Jisung XDXD
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	36. I Miss You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Seongwoo._
> 
> The name felt sacred on the tip of his tongue.  
> He whispered the name softly, hush-like, like a forbidden confession. He loves the owner of that name, and he was missing him like crazy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!
> 
> Ah I miss OngNiel so much QWQ  
> Really wish they could interacted often, like Donghan-Kenta-Sanggyun and another members of JBJ. That would be ideal--they met often IRL and during work, and often mentioned each other on shows/interviews/vlive videos. So far, WANNA ONE members often mentioned each other and some of them collaborated for events, but I'm still so thirsty for OngNiel ;________; I hope Daniel's case would be over soon XDXD

 

* * *

 

 

Time passed really quickly these days.

Right after his cameo part, his company swarmed Daniel’s schedule with so many activities and jobs. It was no longer ordinary photoshoot for ads or magazine, they put him into various variety show as well. Sure he appeared as a guest or a mere panelist, but it was hard and tiring—he was almost always on the edge since he didn’t have his memories and he need extra effort to recognize the other guests that appeared along with him. 

 

It was crucial for Daniel to check whether he supposed to “know” the other guests, as if they were friends or at least acquaintances—and if so, how close they were, followed with when and where the last time they spoke with each other, and what was the topic of the conversations. It felt like he was playing a game of guessing, an endless charades, and he hate the guilt that rested in his stomach as he felt that he had lied to those people. One mistake, a mere stupid mistake, and he could blew everything over. Daniel despised that feeling.

 

Moreover, it was hard to meet with Seongwoo. They didn’t have any overlapping schedule. Daniel felt that all the phone calls and the chats were not enough at all. He missed the older male terribly, to the point that he wanted to scream, ditched everything and just ran—ran to Seongwoo’s place; to directly meet his lover face to face, pulled the older male into his arms, to wrapped his hands around the latter’s body—feeling the warmth and buried his face onto the latter’s neck, inhaling his usual scent of sandalwood and bergamot.

 

Daniel missed those moments when he was able to see Seongwoo’s sleepy face, smiling as he whispered _good morning_ with low husky tone, bare skin without any make up, complete with his morning shades. He missed their morning cuddles, those peppering kisses, to be able to comb the latter’s raven locks using his fingers.

 

Some images often come onto him these days, random but filled with longing and familiar feeling—sweet like a daydream, and sometimes he didn’t want those images to end. He wished those memories to last forever. Because on those memories that came for him, there would be always Seongwoo by his side.

 

It was almost midnight when Daniel felt so tired and weary—he lied on his big bed and closed his eyes… and all of the sudden Daniel found himself lied on the lower side of a bunk bed, the generic bedsheet was pastel blue. 

 

He lied there almost in the dark, the only source of light was the small dim light that gave a yellowish hue near the entrance. Daniel recognized the room—it was one of those rooms in their paju dorm, the one used for the show. The mattress felt firm underneath him, but he was warm and snuggly—someone lied there with him, curled himself into a fetal position. Daniel smelled that scent of sandalwood and bergamot, and he didn’t need to tilted his head to see the figure whom sleeping beside him. Daniel felt the latter’s warm breaths on his skin, and he could imagined how those chest risen and lower in each breath.

 

_Seongwoo_.

 

The name felt sacred on the tip of his tongue. 

He whispered the name softly, hush-like, like a forbidden confession. He loves the owner of that name, and he was missing him like crazy.

 

_Seongwoo._

 

Daniel opened his eyes, and he found himself back at his room—his personal room at his MMO’s dorm. The ceilings was awfully familiar, it felt like it was mocking him as it reminded him that he wasn’t there in their olden days during the show; Seongwoo wasn’t here with him—the older made didn’t fall asleep next to him.

 

Daniel blinked.

He still remember his schedule for tomorrow: he was flying to Jeju as a guest for a particular self-healing laid back show. He would stay there for a whole three days. _It would be relaxing_ , Youngsik Hyung tried to cheer him up, _After all, one of the host is La Miran. She was one of your biggest fan._ Daniel really want to say that _but that’s three days without_ Seongwoo—it would be hard for him to contact the Fantagio actor during a show that put camera on almost 24/7. 

 

_It won’t be so bad,_ his manager then showed him another show of the actress, the one he visited during his WANNA ONE period. The actress was kind, preparing so much food for him. She even packed some, so Daniel could share the meal with Seongwoo. Back then, they were still roommates. His own smiling face when he called Seongwoo on screen, proclaimed cheerfuly that he got food for them, stung Daniel’s heart.

 

_I miss you._

_I want to see you._

 

He still there, lied motionlessly on his bed. His whole body felt boneless, a familiar sore throbbed on his wrist; the very same wrist he repeatedly gotten hurt on the same place. Yet Daniel ignored his pain, and fished for his phone from the top of his bedside cubby.

 

Daniel scrolled though his contacts list, Seongwoo’s number filled the screen. Daniel’s thumb hovered on the call button for a second, then he pressed it eventhough he wondered if the older male was still awake during such late hours. Last time, his call didn’t get connected as Seongwoo had fell asleep an hour before.

 

Surprisingly, the call connected after a few rings.

“Hey,” Seongwoo’s voice was somewhat distorted for a second there. There were random noises before finally Seongwoo’s voice became clear. “Hey,” He repeated, his tone was warm—rang on Daniel’s ears as if there was no distance between the two of them.

 

“Hey,” Daniel said back, and for a moment he felt so silly for saying that word—he sounded so unsure and foolish. But then, Daniel felt so giddy at the moment. He cleared his throat from a non-existent phlegm, “Seongwoo-ya…”

 

“Yeah?”

 

Daniel stared at the round clock hanged on his wall; it was finally a minute after midnight. “Happy birthday to you,” He sang, “Happy birthday to you… Happy birthday, dear Seongwoo…” He was singing the original English version instead of their Korean one, his voice felt weird in his own ears as Daniel tired his best not to let his accent bleed into his English’s pronunciation.

 

“Happy birthday to you,” Daniel sang the last phrase of the song, dragged the last notes before he ended the simple song. “Am I the first one to say it to you today…?”

 

There was a faint stifled sound from the other end of the line. Seongwoo replied with a wavering tone, “Yeah, you are.”

 

As it was past midnight, the date had changed into 25th of August. Seongwoo’s birthday. It almost felt surreal for Daniel. He was so excited, preparing his best to celebrate the older male’s birthday. Back then, it was a week away from today. He thought that he would own enough time to make it the most perfect day ever.

 

But then, the incident at the dentist’s office happened. 

Everything went chaos, and they were put in the whirlwind. Next thing he knew, he had finished the shoot for his cameo role. Then the company simply gave him so much work he barely able to communicate with Seongwoo. It was hard for them to speak, let alone made a time for Seongwoo’s birthday. He didn’t manage to ask for a day off—even worse, tomorrow he would be away from Seoul for whole three days, afar from the person he wanted to share his days with.

 

“I wish you all the best,” Daniel continued, meant every words he said, “All the luck and happiness in this world, good health and a long life. I would like to give you all my love, my whole heart…” He hated himself for being so cliche tough; his congratulatory words felt so textbook and predictable, “And I wished that all your dream will come true. I would do my best to help you achieve them, I promise.”

 

“Thank you,” Seongwoo sounded as if he was crying. “I’m… really happy.”

 

“I miss you,” Daniel blurted. He couldn’t help it; Seongwoo’s crying voice stabbed his heart. “I really, really miss you,” Daniel whispered tenderly, “I’m a mess without you. I’m the worst boyfriend ever, aren’t I? I couldn’t meet you to celebrate your birthday, I got this schedule—“

 

“I know,” Seongwoo cut his explanation. The older male paused for a second, “Jihyo Noona had told me. Youngsik Hyung contacted her about it. Three days recording at Jeju, the one with La Miran as one of the host, right?”

 

“…yeah.”

 

“You didn’t sound excited about it,” Seongwoo chuckled, “You used to love these kind of show. Back then you were really hyped about Dangerous Outside the Blanket—you said that it was a great programme as it allowed you to take a breathe and having fun while still working. This show got similar relaxing concept, even I envied you.”

 

“But you won’t be there,” Daniel replied immediately, his tone was firm, “And it’s your birthday…”

 

“It’s okay. It’s just a birthday.”

 

“It’s… not just a mere another day for me,” Daniel tried to explain, “Thank you for being born. I’m not good with explanation—but I’m thankful that you’re with me, Seongwoo-ya.”

 

“Mmm.”

 

“Are you blushing right now?”

 

“Stop it,” 

 

There was shyness on that tone. Daniel almost could imagine those pink hue dusted Seongwoo’s face. Seongwoo immediately said, “It’s late. Go to sleep, you’re leaving to Jeju in the morning right?” 

 

Then he ended the call, just like that. Daniel stared at his screen, and then chuckled. His lover is so adorable.

 

* * *

 

The airport got fewer people in the morning.

Daniel pulled his small suitcase to the boarding lounge. He was wearing his airport fashion, a sponsored supreme shirt along with his ripped jeans and matching denim jacket, he pulled the hoodie down to cover his head. 

 

Youngsik Hyung had helped him checked in and everything. Usually Daniel prefer to use his duffel bag instead, but the show gave him a sponsored suitcase—so he used the sent suitcase instead of his usual personal bag. There were stickers all across the suitcases, one of the biggest one was the logo of the show, pasted in the middle of the silver suitcase.

 

Daniel sat on the stiff metal based rowed seats. He was wearing his black face mask. It wasn’t many people on the lounge and Daniel selected the particular secluded area on the corner—the giant glass panel showed the huge runway field, several big planes were parked on the sides. 

 

Youngsik Hyung was talking with the show’s staff via a phone call, discussing something about another additional room. Daniel didn’t know why Youngsik requested an extra room, but he wasn’t interested in the topic anyway—so he ignored the conversation.

 

Daniel took off his mask and fished out his phone from his pocket. It would be a few minutes, less than half an hour to be exact, left for him before he need to turned off his phone for the flight. He opened his recent calls list and Seongwoo’s number was there, on the last recent one, number one on the list.

 

He called the number, and after a few rings the call still won’t get connected.

 

Yet, he heard a familiar ringtone was approaching him. Daniel saw a pair of black shoes stopped near him. Daniel felt a _thump_ and raised his gaze. Seongwoo was there, wearing a white graphic tee underneath one of his favourite black coats, his raven hair was combed neatly but not styled. The older male wasn’t wearing any mask, and Daniel could see the wide smile plastered on those pinkish lips.

 

“Hello,” Seongwoo ended the incoming call, “I’m here.”

 

Daniel blinked. “Seongwoo-ya?” _Is he dreaming at the moment?_ The older male was there, standing in front of him, a small bag on his shoulder, looked ethereally beautiful—almost like a fatamorgana, an illussion, a surreal manifestation of his fantasy.

 

“I’m here,” Seongwoo repeated his words, the smile never left his face. He took a few steps closer, and the scent of sandalwood and bergamot hit Daniel’s senses. The younger male opened his arms and took Seongwoo inside his embrace—he felt warm and solid, Daniel wasn’t dreaming. “You’re here,” Daniel said, his tonee was husky and wavered as he felt a burst of emotion choked his throat.

 

“Mmm,” Seongwoo nodded. Daniel traced the latter’s face, fingertips trailed on Seongwoo’s skin. Daniel’s thumb stopped on the three moles on Seongwoo’s cheek, and finally a really huge smile appeared on Daniel’s face. His eyes were misty, and he felt so happy he want to cry. He leaned in and sealed their lips in a kiss—a rather chaste, but long and emotional.

 

“I miss you,” Daniel whispered, then he stole another kiss. Seongwoo gave him a hum for a reply, almost breathless when finally their lips parted. “That’s why I’m here,” He said, his smile broke into a grin, “I managed to clear my schedules, so I would go to Jeju with you. Only for two nights though. I got another show on the third day.”

 

Daniel wanted to say that two days are plenty enough, but on the same time he felt it was not long enough to charge his ‘Seongwoo battery’ inside him. Still, Daniel smiled and pulled the actor into a tight bear hug. It felt assuring, his heart leaped in bliss as he tightened his arms around the older male’s shoulders.

 

He wanted to conveyed so many things to his lover at the moment, but he couldn’t find the words. But somehow, Seongwoo understood. The raven haired put his own arms around Daniel’s torso, leaving no gap between their upper bodies. Seongwoo could heard Daniel’s heartbeats, loud and steady, in synched with his own heartbeats.

 

“Happy birthday, Seongwoo-ya,” Daniel said again, still not moving an inch. He was reluctant to ended their hug. Seongwoo smiled as he closed his eyes and replied, “Thank you, Niel-ah.”

 

* * *

 

 

I found this [picture on twitter](https://twitter.com/fruits_one/status/1104781092941291520) and felt that it fit so well with the scene:

I miss OngNiel so much these days QWQ

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How many of you remember the scene where Daniel was preparing for Seongwoo's birthday, but then the sasaeng assaulted them at the dentist? :3
> 
> Btw so many rumours about Daniel keep pouring nowadays. It was frustrating coz the media somehow fabricated so many things including things like Seungri introduced him to a woman investor from Hong Kong, etc, Daniel hired a lawyer etc, while later then Daniel stated that he want to end everything peacefully--he only want to revise some of his contract and didn't intent to involve any lawyer and didn't wish to leave the company from the first place. #WeTrustYouDaniel Let's hope for the best for our boy! 
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	37. I'm Looking At You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What?” He asked, a smile plastered on his face.
> 
> “I’m looking at you,” Daniel replied honestly, sheepishly grinning. 
> 
> Seongwoo pursed his lips, “You didn’t have anything better to do?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good evening, my lovelies!  
> I posted the chapter rather late (usually I posted it in the morning) since I got a rushed project in the morning, but hey it's still Monday ahahaha~~ And Monday means new chapter ^^
> 
> Enjoy~!!

 

* * *

 

 

There were a lot of plane flights to Jeju Island. It won’t be excessive to say that there would be a flight per half an hour; it felt almost like a travel bus department. Since Daniel’s flight was booked by the variety show’s crew, he boarded the plane earlier—Seongwoo’s flight was one with 20 minutes later, literally the next flight. They need to be careful—though they wanted to be in the same flight and spend more times together, Seongwoo’s whole visitation to the island was a secret.

 

Moreover, the variety crew would videotaped Daniel during the flight as well; thus it would be rather risky to book the same flight. A difference of 20 minutes flight won’t matter much at arrival, after all it would take a while for their whole baggages to be circulated at the conveyor belt. The crew brought a lot of their shooting’s equipment; those heavy and fragile stuffs would be the last luggages to be put on the belt.

 

Since the variety show would be aired on JTBC, the show’s location took place on Lee Hyori’s former house. The private property was used for the show Hyori’s Bed and Breakfast for two season—the compound got a really huge grassland area, a two stories house and a studio attached to the main building. The couple sold their house after an endless nuisance of tourist came ringing their bell almost everyday, and to made matter worse: there were people who illegally broke in and trespassing to the house. Thus they finally got enough, sold the house to JTBC and moved to Gyeonggi prefecture.

 

There was an airbnb place right next door, consisted of many small villas that you could rent for a short period of time. Previously, the helper of Hyori’s Bed and Breakfast show used the place for their lodging. The crew had reserved a place for Daniel at the airbnb, since they preserved Hyori’s former house, which didn’t have any doors or partition originally. The main hosts are females, so they would use the property for themselves while Daniel, as a male guest, would stay next door for privacy concern.

Youngsik Hyung had booked another villa on the same compound for Seongwoo, the older male’s villa building was the one across Daniel’s. The older male would stay there for two nights. Again, they couldn’t use the same villa building since the JTBC crew had put many cameras on the building. 

 

“See you at the airbnb later,” Seongwoo waved at him when it was time for Daniel to board his plane. The older male was smiling tenderly, and Daniel’s heart felt so full he wanted to ran back and hugged the latter once again. But he managed to held himself back and nodded. “See you later,” he smiled back as he waved childishly.

 

“Safe flight.” Seongwoo chuckled, gestured the younger male to enter the plane already. “Safe flight for you too,” Daniel winked. Seongwoo could see the imaginary perked ears and wagging tails on the younger’s frame.

 

* * *

 

The flight was uneventful.

The sky was bright and blue, almost without any clouds. The horizon was blurred into a thin greenish blue line, merging the sky and the sea together. Daniel’s seat was next to the window, so he commented on the beautiful scenery after he greeted the camera. “Waaahh, the sky is really blue. Could you guys see it? Such a good weather. I’m really excited for this trip,” Daniel made excited claps as he pointed out through the window, “I’ve been to Jeju before, but it was the first time I would visit the former home of Lee Hyori sunbaenim. I’ve seen it from the bed and breakfast show before, it seemed to be really peaceful with huge yards. Thanks to JTBC for letting me visiting the place.”

 

Then he added, “Since the theme of the show is self-healing, this show would be relaxing. Am I right? The PD said that the theme is indeed ‘to relax and enjoy the peaceful time’ so I’m really looking forward to it. It’s been a while since I met La Miran Sunbaenim as well. I think… the official last meeting was during one of the show she hosted as well. She really took a great care of me. The cooking was really delicious.”

 

Quickly he added, “Last time, she even prepared an extra portion for Seongwoo Hyung as well. That time I’m still on WANNA ONE, and I was roommate with Seongwoo Hyung. We then ate the meal together, late at night…” He laughed, “Ah, and today is 25th of August, isn’t it? Today is Seongwoo Hyung’s birthday…!”

 

The crews laughed, Daniel looked like an excited puppy. The blonde idol clapped his hands again and sang joyfully, “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you~ Seongwoo Hyung, are you watching this? Ah, it would be a while until it was aired—my bad. I got you a birthday present… Eh?”

 

One of the crew asked about the present, but Daniel smirked secretively. “Ah, no, I didn’t bring the present with me at the moment. I left it at home. I’ll give it to Hyung the next time we meet. Hopefully before the show aired, I had gave the present. It wouldn’t be nice to give a present so late after the actual celebration.”

 

Daniel was in a good mood, contrasted with his earlier gloomy mood. The crew noticed it, but they didn’t think much about it. They asked Daniel a few questions about his schedule, especially his comeback. Daniel paused for a while, “For the moment, I haven’t got any news about the comeback. I would announced it right after I got the news. These days, I participated in a lot of shows though. Before, I also acted as a cameo on The Summer’s Constellation drama. I hope I did a good job. My scenes would be aired soon, ah I’m so nervous… Oh—could I mentioned the drama? It was aired on another TV station, would it be okay for me to mention it? Or would you guys edited this part out later?” He made a scissoring motion, then laughed again, “Sorry for the mess, editor…!” Daniel bowed to the camera.

 

Later, when it was aired, the show’s editor didn’t cut the part out. They merely beeped the drama title—everyone knew the drama anyway, though it shouldn’t be mentioned clearly as the drama was aired on their rival TV station. On the corner of the screen, they added a disclaimer: _“Since Niellie is such a good boy, we didn’t cut this part out completely. Good job on your cameo!”_

 

Daniel reached the Jeju International Airport right on the schedule. The hosts had reached the location a few hours earlier, and the other guest won’t attend the show until tomorrow. The premise of the show was to relax and spending the time leisurely, focusing on unpopular hidden gems on the island that could be a potential self-healing spots for visitors.

 

 

_Landed safely._

_Tell me if you here as well ^^_

**_Daniel. 11:04 AM._ **

 

 

Daniel waited, but the read notification didn’t appear. Seongwoo’s plane was supposedly still on the way, so no surprise if his phone was still off. Daniel only brought a small lightweight suitcase as his hand carry, so he didn’t need to wait for the conveyor belt. Summer clothes were light and not bulky, thus they didn’t took much space on the suitcase. He didn’t bring much of other items, but he did bring his toiletries along with his handy electric mosquitoes swatter. 

 

Still, he stayed there near the conveyor belt area as Youngsik Hyung and the show’s crews were waiting for their checked baggage. Eventhough it wasn’t many passages on their flight, their heavy equipment would be the last items on the belt, thus it took quite a time.

 

 

_Landed._

_Will go to the market before I go to the airbnb._

**_Seongwoo. 11:26 AM._ **

 

_Roger._

_Did you find the gate?_

**_Daniel. 11:26 AM._ **

 

_Haha. Very funny._

_It was just one time when I lost my way on the airport before._

_ONE TIME._

_Well, not only one time, but still._

_Are you on the way to the house?_

**_Seongwoo. 11:26 AM._ **

 

_I’m still near the conveyor belt area._

**_Daniel. 11:27 AM._ **

 

_Oops. I’m heading to that area now._

_Which one is your belt’s number?_

**_Seongwoo. 11:27 AM._ **

 

_The one near the Subway kiosk._

**_Daniel. 11:27 AM._ **

 

_Ah, that’s next to my belt._

_Shoot._

_Would they notice me…?_

**_Seongwoo. 11:28 AM._ **

 

_If they did notice you, should we fake it and pretend to be surprised?_

**_Daniel. 11:28 AM._ **

 

_But how we would explained when they asked why I did I visit Jeju on the same time with your schedule—_

_And what a super coincidence that my place to stay is on the same location with your lodging?_

**_Seongwoo. 11:29 AM._ **

 

_But if we can wing it somehow, we would get a proper excuse to have you here._

_We won’t need to meet each other secretly_

**_Daniel. 11:30 AM._ **

 

_But I’m not a guest on the show._

_I don’t think it would be appropriate._

**_Seongwoo. 11:30 AM._ **

 

_Dang, you’re right._

_What should we do then?_

_Where are you now?_

**_Daniel. 11:30 AM._ **

 

_I’m stalling time at the bathroom._

_I hope no one would recognize me._

_I’m using my best disguise._

**_Seongwoo. 11:30 AM._ **

 

_A black surgical mask and a capped hat?_

**_Daniel. 11:31 AM._ **

 

_Touche._

_Well, tell me right away when you guys left the area._

_I need to take my suitcase from the belt._

**_Seongwoo. 11:31 AM._ **

 

_Ah, the equipments are here._

_They had picked them up._

_OTW to the van._

**_Daniel. 11:35 AM._ **

 

_Okay, will go take my suitcase now._

**_Seongwoo. 11:36 AM._ **

 

_Seongwoo-ya?_

**_Daniel. 11:36 AM._ **

 

_Yeah?_

**_Seongwoo. 11:36 AM._ **

 

_This felt kinda thrilling and excited._

_Somehow it felt like a forbidden relationship and we are a pair of secret lover._

_[giggle emoticon]_

**_Daniel. 11:36 AM._ **

 

_Kang Daniel._

_We ARE a pair of secret lover._

_And it is INDEED a forbidden relationship._

**_Seongwoo. 11:37 AM._ **

 

_Ah_

_[shocked emoticon]_

_OMG YOU’RE RIGHT_

_I’M TOTALLY FORGET ABOUT IT!_

**_Daniel. 11:37 AM._ **

 

_………_

_Why did I have such a dork as my lover_

**_Seongwoo. 11:37 AM._ **

 

_Because you love this dork~!_

_[lovebeam sticker]_

**_Daniel. 11:37 AM._ **

 

 

* * *

 

The weather was really sunny when the van hit the road. They quickly reached the seaside road, and Daniel lowered the window; letting the sea breeze hit his face, carried the familiar scent of the sea along. It felt different with the one in Busan—the wind felt more damp with sharper notes of salt contents. After all, Jeju is an island surrounded by the sea, and this particular area was the one with strong waves and wind. The rocky area produced a natural barrier, and everytime the wave crashed, the sound was loud and majestic.

 

Daniel wanted to text Seongwoo again, but the cameramen was aiming the camera towards him already, so Daniel smiled to the camera. “The waves are amazing…!” He commented, “I wondered if we would visit any place near the sea later. It would be fun to watch the waves, playing on the water, or eat any seafood specialities. The sea at night should be pretty as well. It’s summer, so it would be fun to lit some fireworks as well. The small ones—you know? That handheld one, the one who sparkles?”

 

Then it hit him.

 

 

_It was dark and rather quiet._

_It was only the two of them. The sand felt damp and cold beneath his toes, and Daniel shook his flip-flop. The remains of the sand was still there though, slipped into his footwear whenever he moved or took a step._ _He was holding the small fireworks using both of his hands. They sparkled beautifully, golden and endlessly bursting, leaving a fluorescent trail in the air as he waved them against the darkness._

 

_He was laughing along with the older male. His fireworks finally died out, so Daniel put them in the water filled bucket near the raven haired male. Seongwoo was wearing a long sleeved white shirt, the wind tousled his hair. His own firework was still lit, the golden hue biased the lines of his feature, basking Seongwoo in a soft glow._

 

_Daniel stared at his lover, eyes gentle and heart full of love. Seongwoo looked so beautiful, so ethereally bewitching, like a fairy slipped into the mortal world. When Seongwoo’s firework finally died out as well, he noticed Daniel’s gaze._

 

_“What?” He asked, a smile plastered on his face._

 

_“I’m looking at you,” Daniel replied honestly, sheepishly grinning. Seongwoo pursed his lips, “You didn’t have anything better to do?”_

 

_“You are beautiful,” Daniel blurted again. He felt so thankful that Seongwoo was his lover, and how they could spent a time like this together. He took the burnt firework from the latter’s hand and put it into the bucket, then he took another step towards the raven haired and touched the latter’s cheeks._

 

_“May I…?” He asked, and Seongwoo nodded almost immediately. Daniel leaned in and kissed those luscious lips, felt soft and sweet._

 

 

Daniel blinked. 

He found himself on a ride, inside a van, with a camera pointed on him. The cameramen hadn’t realized his pause yet, so Daniel put a pondered expression. “I wonder what would we have for lunch…” His voice trailed, “I felt rather hungry…” He rubbed his stomach in exaggerated fashion.

 

_Ah, I miss you already._

_I want to meet you, Seongwoo-ya._

_I couldn’t wait until our private time together…_

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Korean news were crazy these days. Seungri and Burning Sun scandal was everywhere, and when I said everywhere it was really EVERYWHERE. It was on the news, even the non K-Poppers were at least heard or read about it somewhere. And seriously, there were people who took the opportunity to slander Daniel as well using the scandal since he knew Seungri and had met with him before.
> 
> When the ignorant local media made a very click-baiting headline mentioning Kang Daniel as one of the celebrities involved with the scandal I really want to scream "RESEARCH YOUR SOURCE PROPERLY AAAAHHHH!" Daniel's lawyer had stated that he didn't involved with Burning Sun and his focus was to end his dispute with LM. Good luck Niel!!
> 
> ((And I'm screaming for the ELLE magazine's cover!))  
> #WeTrustYouKangDaniel 
> 
> Btw, should I include his dispute with LM as well?  
> Well, I often mentioned him as MMO idol instead of LM, so I could make some excuses about it.
> 
>  
> 
> P.S. Have you guys seen the clip when Seongwoo got 'lost' on the airport during his recent fanmeeting schedule? LOLZ (CMIIW)  
> The gate was right ahead but he went to the wrong direction ROFLMAO He's so adorkable~~!
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	38. Places in Jeju [1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With all the ruckus and excitement, Daniel tried his best to keep his expression.  
> He laughed and nodded, stated that he would like if Seongwoo really showed up as the tomorrow’s guest.  
> Cold sweats rolled down on his body though, since the statement felt like a premonition of something. 
> 
> _Could we safely meet later?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday Morning as usual, my lovelies~!!  
> I researched a lot for this chapter LOLZ My co-worker caught me while I'm browsing for spots in Jeju Island and asked me, "You are going to Jeju?" No lah. I just do my research ROFLMAO
> 
> More of Jeju's tourist destinations will be mentioned in the next chapter as well.  
> Seriously, you could visit Jeju by using my chapters as reference LOLLLZZ

 

* * *

 

 

It turned out that Daniel didn’t have enough idle time to be dwelled in his own yearning. Since it was a variety show, the cameramen constantly followed him. He had expected these kinds of situation before, but Daniel couldn’t help to lament how he could spend his time with Seongwoo with such a hectic schedule.

 

The show itself was not as laid back as he thought before. Right off the bat, he was shipped and dropped off to the [former house of Lee Hyori](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyori%27s_Homestay). The JTBC staff didn’t rename the property, and maintained the whole lot to preserve the setting just like when the superstar couple lived there. There were some changes of course, since the couple took some of their furnitures and all of their personal belongings—thus the staff re-furnished the building while trying to replicate the previous cozy and peaceful vibe the house gives during the bed and breakfast show.

 

The huge yard got a small greenhouse located near the front gate. Originally Lee Hyori did use the plot area for her vegetables patches, so the staff expanded the plot and grew many herbs and vegetables on the plot. They erected a proper greenhouse, even decorated it using mini [dol hareubang](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dol_hareubang) statue dolls near the double slide door. The greens were thriving under the warm weather, crops abundant and ready to be harvested.

 

On the back plot behind the main building, the wooden hot tub that showed during the second season of the bed and breakfast show was still maintained well. They had repaired the planks and installed a new water system as the faucet seemed to be faulty before.

 

The rest of the building was the same, except that the attached studio now turned into another room after all of the previous recording and musical instruments were taken out by the owner to their new place. The other bedroom was located on the second floor of the main building—it was the original master bedroom after all, next to the bathroom and toilet. They still haven’t installed any door, but using the very same screen partition used on the show before. 

 

There were a new seating area with temporary canopy installed in the middle yard, next to the barbeque and mini pit for the camp fire. But it wasn’t permanent and overall the fans of the previous show would get a really strong whiff of nostalgia—it had been a while since they saw the house on screen. 

 

The main hosts were mostly females. Else than La Miran, there were Kim Sook, Park Narae and Min Hyorin. It was almost a nostalgic reunion group of the first Unnies group from the [Sister Slamdunk KBS show](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sister%27s_Slam_Dunk). There were also Kim Tae Gyun and Hong Seok Cheon as the male hosts. With so many casts, they ended up splitting into two groups for the lodging: the women at the main building while the male ones sleep at the former mini studio. That’s why they placed Daniel and the upcoming guest at the next door airbnb.

 

The vegetation on the yard was all in full bloom, all the way from the front gate to the pathway area in front of the house building. The hosts had arrived to the site the night before, and last night they dined at the vegetarian franchise restaurant, [Loving Hut](http://www.jejuweekly.com/news/articleView.html?idxno=3287). This vegetarian franchise got many stores on the globe, and there were two stores located in Jeju. The bigger one was located at the Jungang branch, and they ordered the famous tofu steak and tofu cutlet with ginger sauce, accompanied with Vietnamese rice paper wraps. 

 

Today after the satisfying hearty meals and playing several rigorous activities games, they woke up rather late. When Daniel arrived, it was nearly time for lunch. The hosts were stalling time since they knew that a guest will come, but they didn’t know who—the guests were kept secret from the hosts. Even Daniel didn’t know the other guest who will join them tomorrow.

 

At the moment, the hosts were hanging out in the dining area next to the verandah, and when the front gate’s bell chimed, Kim Sook checked the panel and exclaimed, “MIRAN! MIRAN!” The latter was sitting leisurely on the wooden chair, still sniffing the wonderful smell from her Jeju orange tea courtesy from one of their sponsor, [Osulloc](http://www.osulloc.com/kr/en). “Hmm?” The actress hummed as the reply, and blissfuly sipped her tea.

 

“KANG DANIEL IS AT THE FRONT GATE!” Kim Sook waved her hand furiously, signalled her friend to quickly approached her and see the LED panel by herself. Immediately, Miran choked on the tea. Hastily, she put her cup down and trotted all the way to the panel. Kim Sook had pressed the communication button, “KANG DANIEL-SII????”

 

“Ah yes,” Daniel laughed. He was standing in front of the huge wooden gate, as the staff had left him there. His suitcase was right next to him—he was instructed to kept it on the house in the mean time, before carried it back to the airbnb later. Daniel bowed to the security camera, “I’m here, sorry for intruding you guys.”

 

“No, you are not bothering us at all…!” Instead of Kim Sook, La Miran replied in her full fangirl frenzy. She pressed the open button and made an inner cheering as she continued, “Please, come in…!” 

 

The talented actress had been a longtime fans and met him previously during her other show, [Weekend Instruction Manual](https://www.allkpop.com/article/2018/10/kang-daniel-to-be-on-tvns-weekend-user-manual). The younger male revealed his worries and Miran advised to just live freely. _You don’t need to be a better person. You can just live as the person that you are,_ Miran told him before, _If you think about it, this time won’t come back. This age, this type of atmosphere, this experience. You should enjoy it fully and make the most out of your youth. Let’s make it our goal to just live happily and well. Let’s just live!_ They still kept contact once in a while, but it’s been a while since their last meeting. Miran and Kim Sook joyfully squealling and danced in circles, Miran even looked giddy.

 

Since the two of them made quite a ruckus, the action notified the other hosts. Min Hyorin came down from the second floor while Park Narae along with Kim Tae Gyun and Hong Seok Cheon quickly ended their foot bath at the backyard’s hot tub and dried themselves to put their slippers. 

 

“Kang Daniel is our guest…?” Hyorin asked, her long silky hair was tied into a half updo. Lately, she was even more beautiful after her marriage—the other female hosts teased her about it. It was barely a little over a year since she got married, and the month after the wedding Taeyang entered his military service. She visited from time to time, but being newlyweds yet couldn’t be lovey dovey all the time made her pouts sometimes. She couldn’t wait for December to come, after the agonizing 21 months.

 

After the gate opened using the buzz from the control panel, Daniel entered the yard as he dragged his suitcase along through the paved stone pathway. The hosts emerged from the house, waving and rushing towards him. Kim Sook and La Miran were the ones who called his name excitedly. They patted his shoulders and cheerfully greeted him. “Long time no see…!”

 

Though it was a relaxing show, it was different from the ones like Dangerous Outside The Blanket. After all, the purpose of the show was to introduce infamous and hidden gems of the location. Soon after Daniel stored his suitcase on the living room and drink a cup of the sponsored Jeju Cherry Blossom Blended Tea from Osulloc, they departed to their lunch’s place.

 

Located in a quiet residental area, [Mulmegol](https://www.bnbhero.com/tours/434%20%20https://www.visitjeju.net/en/themtour/view?contentsid=CNTS_000000000022813&menuId=DOM_000001832000000000#) was converetd from a local house into a restaurant. It gives nostalgic and vintage vibe from the olden days, dominated with wooden furnitures, like a preserved pension house. It has many earthen pots in the garden. Inside of the pots were traditional Korean sauces and pastes, the chef used them for the dishes served on the restaurant.

 

Hong Seok Cheon introduced the owner, then explained: “The owner believes that _‘food is life’_ thus she only uses seasonal and fresh materials from nature.” They were served various dishes, including _Yeonipbap Jeongsik_ which is steamed rice wrapped in a lotus leaf, _Yakcho Deulggae Sujebi_ which is small pieces of dough in a soup with herb and perilla seeds, and _Ma Bibimbap_ , the Chinese yam with mixed vegetables on rice. 

 

Along with the meals, the owner served them a special beverage called _Shindarimul_. Made from rice, the drink was only available in Jeju. It tasted sweet and sour, really refreshing since it was rather a hot day.

 

Most of the dishes in this restaurant didn’t have stimulating and salty taste, but they got wholesome and simple scent and taste will leave a pleasant aftertaste. They tastes just right. Though, there were bolder tastes on a few of the selection menu.

 

“Oh, the yam rice is nice,” Daniel commented. The Chinese yam got a sticky and slippery texture. Somehow he got reminded to Seongwoo. The older male got a rather childish palate—Seongwoo loves bold burst of flavours and food with excellent textures. Especially when the owner offered him the _Eorini Gamgyul Jumeokbap_ to taste. The Mandarin riceball was made using Mandarin fruit. It tastes sweet and sour, and the owner said many children love that dish.

 

“Woah, Seongwoo-ya would love this kind of dish,” Daniel accidentally commented spontaneously, but before he slapped himself in his mind since he couldn’t keep his mouth shut, Seok Cheon chimed in, “Ah, you right…! When you guys participated on the _Please Take Care of My Refrigerator_ show, Seongwoo told us that he loves sweet and sour dishes.” The said show was also aired at JTBC, so it was okay to mentioned about it. Surely, the editor team would take the clips from the said show and included it on the flashback. 

 

Daniel laughed nerveously, tried to hide his own awkwardness. He forgot that Seok Cheon is Seongwoo’s fanboy. Daniel couldn’t help to think… how will he react when he learned that Seongwoo was here in Jeju, and actually stayed next door? 

 

“It would be nice if Ong Seongwoo could join our show this time,” Kim Tae Gyun commented, and the other hosts agreed right away. “Ah, maybe our next secret guest would be him…!” Park Narae joined the suggestion—she got a favourable impression of the actor since their meeting during Happy Together show when WANNA ONE members showed again as guests for the show.

 

With all the ruckus and excitement,Daniel tried his best to keep his expression. He laughed and nodded, stated that he would like if Seongwoo really showed up as the tomorrow’s guest. Cold sweats rolled down on his body though, since the statement felt like a premonition of something. _Could we safely meet later?_

 

After the meal, they went to [Ilchul Land](https://www.visitjeju.net/en/detail/view?contentsid=CONT_000000000500514). 

Located at the east side of Jeju Island, Ilchul Land is a scenic place which gives pleasant rest with trees and flowers. It was surely fitting with the relaxing theme of the show. Admission fee is 9.000 won for an adult. Despite the cost, the place has various themes so that there are a lot of things to see. Visitors could rest leisurely and enjoy the Riverside Park, _Dolhareubang_ , Grass Park, Square Pond, Bottom Fountain, _Micheon_ Cave, Fossil Garden, _Jeju Jonggajip_ , Sculpture Path, Sedari Hackberry, Bonsai Garden, Art Center, Zoo of old memory, Cactus Greenhouse, and Subtropical Promenade. 

 

It was a of spots for one place, as La Miran described all of these places patiently like a teacher lectured her pupils. The editor team added professor outfit animation on her later, along with animated chalk green board filled with bullets points of her explanation.

 

“There are a lot of to see and do here in Ilchul Land, but our destination today is the [Art Center](https://www.visitjeju.net/en/themtour/view?contentsid=CNTS_000000000022813&menuId=DOM_000001832000000000#),” Kim Sook told the audience, “There are some craft activities for you to enjoy such as natural dyeing or making a ceramic plate. There is a natural indigo coloured dye here, and we would try to create a scarf using the natural dyeing techniques.”

 

“Oh?” Min Hyorin reacted as it was on cue, “It was one among the oldest dyes to be used for textile dyeing and printing, right…? I heard that the indigo dye got complicated chemical principle and process. Due its complex method, traditional indigo dye has gradually disappeared. Can we success to produce the craft?”

 

“No worries…!” Kim Sook smiled, “The staffs will help us. Viewers, do not worry okay? Come and try this course. If you participate in this program, you’ll listen to a lecture about the process of natural dye. This natural dying activity is a unique experience that you can’t easily do in your daily life.”

 

After the introduction, the members went inside the Art Center and got some explanation about the indigo dye and the dyeing process. The one they would try to create is one of the simplest option, the scarf. They were provided with all of the tools and materials, and the instructor demonstrated the process before letting them try the dyeing process themselves. 

 

They were challenged to create their own patterns. Some of them were trying to create something unique, but Daniel wanted something simple and made a gradient pattern with void pattern of his name using a DIY template screen he created using the pattern material. The result was a beautiful dip-dye scarf with elegant stencil. After dyeing the scarf, they rinsed and wrung it out. After that, they only need to dry the scarfs outside in the sun. The breeze blew, serenely waved the indigo cloth and made them danced on the clothesline. 

 

“Daniel, you got two scarfs…?” Tae Gyun pointed the almost identical set of dip-dyed scarf that hanged next to each other. The other scarf was almost the same with his final scarf, but didn’t have the stencilled name. “Ah,” Daniel explained, “That’s my prototype. They said I could take it as well, so I did.”

 

Truthfully, he made it after his scarf. He wanted to create the same scarf for Seongwoo, but to avoid attention, he didn’t put his name or Seongwoo’s name stencilled on the scarf. The hosts believed him though, and congratulated him for his good job dying his scarfs. Despite it seemed simple and not as elaborated as La Miran full dyed scarf with vines stencils all over the material, it was better than some of the other scarfs produced by the other hosts. The winner of the challenge was of course the actress, and Kim Sook lamented on how Miran always good with her hands—while she disastrously made her dye bleeds into the supposed void pattern, resulting in a messy patterned scarf.

 

During the shooting, Daniel couldn’t send any text to Seongwoo. Now that they had finished the shooting at the Art Center, Daniel quickly sent a photo of the scarfs to Seongwoo.

 

 

_Seongwoo-ya, I made scarfs~!_

_The one next to mine is yours :)_

_[photo]_

**_Daniel. 15:40 PM._ **

 

_They looks nice!_

_[thumbs up animated emoji]_

**_Seongwoo. 15:40 AM._ **

 

_Where are you right now?_

**_Daniel. 15:40 PM._ **

 

_At the airbnb._

_Youngsik Hyung had ordered me some takeouts_

_I couldn’t go out freely since the JTBC staffs were all over the place_

_The ricebox was nice btw_

_[photo]_

**_Seongwoo. 15:40 AM._ **

 

_We ate this before_

_[photo]_

_[photo]_

_[photo]_

_It was really delicious_

_I thought that you would like this one in particular:_

_[photo]_

**_Daniel. 15:41 PM._ **

 

_Okay come here and let me punch you once_

_How dare you boasted your feast to compare with my measly ricebox_

_Come_

_I’ll give you proper beatings_

_[fist emoticon]_

_[fire in eyes animated emoji]_

**_Seongwoo. 15:41 AM._ **

 

_I packed some of the dish and the riceballs for you_

_I couldn’t take all the banchans though_

_[photo]_

**_Daniel. 15:41 PM._ **

 

_Kang Daniel-ssi_

_I love you so much ah_

_Here, come to Hyung_

_[hug and kisses animated emoji]_

**_Seongwoo. 15:42 AM._ **

 

 

Daniel laughed. 

Thankfully, no one commented on his behaviour. They went back to the house to enjoy some leisure time. They would ate some black pork BBQ later in the evening, then went to the planetarium on the night. All of them was really excited, as the BBQ dish is one of Jeju delicacies. 

 

“Daniel, you love meats, right?” Seok Cheon asked him, and Daniel nodded, “I really like it. They even called me ‘Kang Meat’ back there in Busan.”

 

 

_We are coming back to the house_

**_Daniel. 15:42 PM._ **

 

_Roger_

_I will hide in my airbnb_

**_Seongwoo. 15:42 AM._ **

 

_Seongwoo-ya…_

_[poke emoji]_

**_Daniel. 15:43 PM._ **

 

_Hmmm?_

**_Seongwoo. 15:42 AM._ **

 

_I miss you ah_

_I wanna meet you_

_I wonder if we could meet during all these chaos_

**_Daniel. 15:42 PM._ **

 

_Yeah_

_[puke blood emoji]_

_I didn’t consider about the staffs and your schedule when I decided to come_

_Your schedule was surely packed eh_

_Even I wondered how to safely meet you in secret_

**_Seongwoo. 15:42 AM._ **

 

_We are like Romeo and Juliet at the moment_

_[wiggle eyebrows animated emoji]_

**_Daniel. 15:42 PM._ **

 

 

“Eh, what…?!” 

 

Suddenly, the show’s PD exclaimed in surprise. He was talking on his phone, and his face went grim. He looked pale, “Ah, it couldn’t be helped then. Yeah, yeah… I understand. Too bad though— Well, next time please do come as a guest, we’ll invite him again.”

 

He ended the call and sighed as he locked his phone. The PD seemed to be deep in thought. Sitting next to him on the van, Tae Gyun asked him, “What happened?”

 

The PD was hesitant for a few seconds, but currently they weren’t recording anything so he explained, “You see, our next secret guest is Park Bo Gum. He appeared before during the season 2 of the bed and breakfast, so we thought it would be a plus to have him on the show since we are using the house. But his original flight from overseas got delayed due bad weather. He was still trapped on the airport at the moment and the next scheduled flight won’t be after tomorrow during the evening. There was no way for him to reach Jeju before we wrapped our time here.”

 

“Ah,” Chorus of lamented noises came from the hosts, especially the females, “Too bad that he couldn’t come…”

 

Hearing the explanation, Daniel pondered for a while. Then, he fished out his phone again and sent another text to Seongwoo.

 

 

_Seongwoo-ya_

_Would you like to eat black pork BBQ and go to the planetarium later?_

**_Daniel. 15:45 PM._ **

 

_???_

_Huh?_

_What do you mean???_

**_Seongwoo. 15:45 AM._ **

 

_The original guest couldn’t come and our PD was looking for another guest at the moment_

_I could tell him about you if you want to join the show_

_I mean…_

_It would be easier to you spending time here with me as another secret guest_

_No one know that you are not the intended guest, anyway_

_If all’s well, you’ll got paid and they would reimburse the lodging fee, right?_

**_Daniel. 15:45 PM._ **

 

_………………_

_You know what, that BBQ really piqued my interest_

_Tell the PD to contact Jihyo Noona_

**_Seongwoo. 15:45 AM._ **

 

 

Daniel laughed again. Then slowly, he tapped on the PD’s shoulder—the latter was sitting in front of him, trying his best to sort his connection to contact another guest ASAP. 

“PD hyung…?” Daniel called, “I have a suggestion, if you want to hear me out.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I linked all of the spots to the source, so you guys could visit the place or just seeing the photos if you wanted to.  
> Btw yeah, I watched the Hyori's bed and breakfast show before, the two seasons of it. I thought since I included Jeju to the story, might as well I inserted something that I'm familiar with, since I saw most of the house from the show. 
> 
> And yeah, I also watch two seasons of Sister's Slamdunk. I got a girl crush to La Miran before she became Daniel's fangirl since she was so hardworking and all around talented (I mean she could act, dance and sing well, even better that the Unnies's younger members) And yes, that's why I borrowed her name for Seongwoo's past life character at [my other fic, Forever & A Day.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16659853)
> 
>  
> 
> So here's how I pick the hosts for the fictional show:  
> \- Kim Sook and La Miran had met Daniel before during Weekend Instruction Manual  
> \- Park Narae was meeting WANNA ONE during Happy Together  
> \- I included Min Hyorin since I wanted the Unnies to get a mini reunion, and I especially love her rather slow and laid back reaction during season one of Sister Slamdunk LOLZ  
> \- Kim Tae Gyun was selected since Daniel had met him before during Hello Counselour  
> \- Hong Seok Cheon coz he's Seongwoo's fanboy since Produce 101 era ahahahaha~~ It's a plus that he is one of the openly gay celeb in Korea 
> 
>  
> 
> Btw I kinda avoided the big 5 from Happy Together squad as hosts coz:  
> 1.) Yoo Jae Suk hosted so many shows already LOLZZ  
> 2.) The big 5 made a bro pact with WANNA ONE before, and thus if Daniel made a mistake while interacting with them it would be bad :(


	39. Places in Jeju [2]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He sat there side by side with Seongwoo—the red chairs reclined, so they were lying on their back. The movie was projected on the dome, but the visitors’s sitting area was kept dark. Daniel’s fingers trailed towards Seongwoo’s seat, then one by one, his fingers met with Seongwoo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday evening, my lovelies!!
> 
> Yeah sorry today's update was rather late--I'm multitasking by doing my own works of the day (busy morning all of the sudden, omo! the sales suddenly reported so many promotions in the same morning) and juggling between planning my colleague's bridal shower plus her wedding invitation plus my cousin's baby 3rd birthday invitation UWU (if you're reading my bio @ my twitter, I do graphic designs... so yeah)
> 
> Today is April Mop but I didn't lie today at all LOLZ  
> Instead, my group chat was in frenzy when a twitter acc disguised as mecimapro (but with double i) posted about [Ong Seongwoo's fanmeet](https://twitter.com/meciimapro/status/1112400351288651776) but yeah, it was an April Mop joke. The real promotor even posted a [clarification post.](https://twitter.com/mecimapro/status/1112565956553797632)

* * *

 

It was one huge whirlwind: one moment he was following Daniel to Jeju for a secret rendezvous, but the next thing happened was Jihyo Noona contacted him to confirm about a rushing agreement to join a variety show on the spot. It felt rather anti-climatic; but the crews were everywhere and it was really hard to play such a mouse and cat chasing game. True that he didn’t actually plan his decision to go to Jeju beforehand—it was a moment of YOLO and he impulsively believed that Daniel would have enough spare time to be with him, without knowing the format of the show.

 

Since his decision to hire the opposite villa from Daniel’s airbnb villa backfired anyway, Daniel’s offer to join the show as a substitute guest was actually saving him from an endless hide and seek with the whole world. This way, if any netizen caught him spending time with Daniel, the whole crew would be there and they were naturally deemed to spending time together since they were the casts of the show anyway.

 

Immediately after the deal, Youngsik Hyung helped him to moved his suitcase to the other room at Daniel’s villa. Thankfully, he hadn’t do much at his previous room so they didn’t need to tidy anything. The owner agreed to shifted half of the room’s fee to the other villa after the cancelation fee, and although he couldn’t get his whole reservation fee 100% refunded, the whole lodging bill was later could be reimbursed to JTBC.

 

Seongwoo brushed his hair for the last time and double checked his black shirt. It was short sleeves with a round neck, a long English phrases was printed in front of it: _to infinity and beyond._ It was originally Daniel’s shirt, so it was rather oversized on him. He tucked the front half of the shirt into his summer denim jeans; the pants was rather thin with several intended ripped patch on both legs, the washed out colour looked nice and cool. Instead of a sneaker, he opted for a casual Adidas slip on. It was a rather short walk to the next compound, after all.

 

He was contemplating to spray some cologne or not when his front door rang. Seongwoo automatically answered, grabbed his cologne bottle hastily and quickly sprayed his body with a whiff of his usual bergamot and sandalwood scent. He checked himself for the last time on the mirror, then opened his door.

 

Seongwoo didn’t realize that the camera installed in his room caught all of his antics. Later, the scene was edited with many animations and witty captions, making the viewers squealed as he looked like a young teenager being nervous before his first date with his longtime crush.

 

“Nuguseyo…?” Seongwoo asked as he opened the lock, and before the front door was fully opened, Daniel replied with a wide grin, “Sarangheooo~~”

 

Both of them laughed, as the whole ‘ _Nuguseyo-Sarangheo_ ’ antics was a parody of their previous action, an easter egg from Spongebob and Patrick scene during one episode of the cartoon series. 

 

Daniel was wearing a thin white shirt underneath his short sleeves Hawaiian shirt, the dark green leaves contrasted with the bright pink flamingo. The younger male was wearing a short khaki pants along with a strap-on hiking sandals. The whole combination should make him looked lame, but he pulled the whole outfit so well—he looked comfy yet stylish at the same time.

 

“Let’s eat some BBQ,” Daniel almost offered his hand to Seongwoo, but then he realized the camera installed on the villa along with the one cameramen followed him, standing right just behind him. Seongwoo nodded, and the two of them took a short walk to the house next door.

 

Right away, Hong Seok Cheon noticed Seongwoo. He brightened up and welcomed him with a huge smile plastered on his face. “I’m so glad you could joined us, Seongwoo…!” The other hosts laughed—after all these years, Seok Cheon is still a huge fanboy of Ong Seongwoo. They chatted for a while—Park Narae asked about Seongwoo’s latest activities and Seongwoo explained in details, added some white lies about his visitation to Jeju.

 

“Oh, I got some free time on my schedule, so I thought it would be nice to take a short vacation. I wanted a place with great scenery, so I picked Jeju.” Seongwoo said in really convincing and earnerst tone. The hosts believed his explanation, exclaimed, “Still, what a coincidence…! It’s really great that you could join us.”

 

Seongwoo laughed along with them, tried to cover his awkwardness.

 

The BBQ was festive and delicious. The black pork meats were plenty and La Miran expertly grilled them. Kim Sook clapped, “Ah, you are great as always…!” The veteran actress after all, was a camping enthusiast and got experiences on doing outdoor BBQ like this. She cut the meats into bite sized pieces, and even grilled some skewered vegetables and corn cob on the side. The smell was really incredible and mouth watering.

 

During the BBQ, it was Min Hyorin who noticed something. People often labeled her as slow-witted and not the sharpest in the bunch as she was innocent and tend to be gullible; but she was observant. She first noticed it when Kang Daniel took a whole bunch of meats to his own plate—then before Hyorin managed to lectured him as he was hogging almost half of the newly grilled meat, she saw that he put half of those meats onto Seongwoo’s plate.

 

_Oh, he helped him to take some meat._ Hyorin nodded, approved the action as Seongwoo was busy answering the hosts’s questions and barely have time to take any meats from the grill. Then, it was dawned to her again when Daniel quietly put his own plate to the side and took a step towards Seongwoo—the younger male took a bottle of barley tea from the older male’s hand and twisted the cap open, then naturally gave back the bottle to Seongwoo without saying anything. He did it so quick and smooth, the whole gesture screamed that he had done it thousand of times before.

 

Hyorin wondered if it was due the fact that the two of them were bandmates before, but despite the whole interactions during the dinner, Daniel and Seongwoo gravitated towards each other. They didn’t seem to notice it, the other hosts also never realized it—so Hyorin just swallowed her observation’s result to herself.

 

While witnessing Daniel and Seongwoo stood side by side, Daniel was saying something to Seongwoo as he once again transported meat pieces to the latter’s plate, Hyorin could only sighed in envy. _Ah,_ she thought, _I miss my husband._

 

* * *

 

They went to the [planetarium](https://www.visitjeju.net/en/detail/view?contentsid=CONT_000000000500555) next. 

During March until October, it opened until 11 PM. They reached the lit-up building at 9.30ish PM, but it was enough to enjoy the exhibition there. Kim Tae Gu quoted the information for the place as he introduced the planetarium, “Jeju Starlight World Park and Planetarium is the place for celestial body observation and astronomical education with cutting-edge astronomic universe science facility to plant dreams and hopes with no boundaries in teenagers, who are the leaders of the 21st century.”

 

All of them clapped. There was so many exhibiton they could explore: gallery, 4D Video, Planetarium, and Observation Center that are installed internally, plus the solar system plaza and sundial is installed on the outside for visitors to enjoy various experiences. The lights were on, so the surroundings were still bright eventhough they came during the late hours. Since it got many attractions and they didn’t have enough time to capture all of them, the PD divided them into groups—each group will explore a certain area at the planetarium.

 

There are a small exhibition area at level 2, with storyboard panels pasted on the walls. It was all in Korean, so Daniel commented, “It would be great for international tourist if they got the English text and explanation as well…” Despite that, their share of exhibiton was really fun. Soon they re-grouped in front of the 4D video area to watch the projections.

 

Again, Daniel noticed that the whole movie was explained in Korean. The non-Korean speaker might be confused with the whole movie, but even Korean was his first language—Daniel couldn’t remember the story narrated by the movie.

 

He sat there side by side with Seongwoo—the red chairs reclined, so they were lying on their back. The movie was projected on the dome, but the visitors’s sitting area was kept dark. Daniel’s fingers trailed towards Seongwoo’s seat, then one by one, his fingers met with Seongwoo. The older male flinched slightly as he felt the younger male’s fingers clasped onto his own; the raven haired stole a glance at him with rosy red cheeks that disguised well in the dark, his lips mouthed an inaudible scolding: _troublemaker…!_ but Seongwoo didn’t pull his fingers back and even tightened the clasp, his palm was slightly sweaty.

 

Daniel blushed in return, really want to roll over and capture the older male’s lips, but he held himself back. Instead, he made circles on Seongwoo’s skin using his thumb. He could felt Seongwoo’s breath ragged a little, so he stole another glance. Seongwoo’s blush had went darker, and his lips were slightly pursed into a faint pout.

 

The narrator still explained about the constellations of summer nights, one of them was the summer’s triangle. Altair, Vega and Deneb were shown sparkling in turns, then they told the celestial story about the daughter of Heaven Emperor that married to the Celestial herder and got punished because they neglected their works after the marriage. Both of Daniel and Seongwoo knew the story—they had joked a lot about the very same constellation after all, since they compared it to Seongwoo’s moles on his cheek. The constellation even became the title of his drama.

 

When their trip to the planetarium ended, it was past 11. Most of them were sleepy and tired, so all of them were asleep as they entered the minivan and sat on their seats. Daniel and Seongwoo got the second back seat on the left side, sat next to each other. Seongwoo was sitting next to the window, but they shut the small curtain that provided on each window to keep the inside dim and Seongwoo’s head was quickly fell onto Daniel’s broad shoulder. The younger male had asleep as well, his blonde head leaned onto Seongwoo’s head—the two of them drifted to dreamland in a snap of a finger.

 

Seeing the state of the hosts, the PD who sat in the front seat noticed Daniel and Seongwoo’s sleeping position and lamented the fact that there was no camera to capture the moment. _Alas_ , he thought, _We could reach a really high rating if only we could capture their sleeping position._

 

But there was no camera, and their minivan hit the road, ready to went back home to their lodgings.

 

* * *

 

Daniel knew that he was dreaming.

Yet, it felt so real. He was dancing—and he knew the routine: it was the Produce 101’s Nayana choreography. The music played from the small tape in the corner echoed though the room. It was dark outside—the class was over after all. He was being stubborn, refused to rest, repeated his moves over and over again.

 

He felt so tired, but his body kept moving. As if he was a robot that received order from its master, repeating the same movements over and over again in an endless loop as long as the power button was still switched on. His body was drenched in sweats, so he pulled out his shirt and threw it aside towards his water bottle. 

 

His own reflection stared back at him; pink hair and rosy cheeks with ragged breath. His sweatpants hanged low on his hips, revealed a bit of his underwear band. There was fire on his eyes, his dark orbs showed a strong determination that refused to give up.

 

_This is my last chance_ , he told himself. If he failed this survival show, he would packed his belongings and go to Canada. To stay there with his aunt’s family, and maybe start a new life that far from the whole entertainment world. He would learn more English, and probably would do a normal 8 to 5 job related to his English speaking ability. He might apply for a job there, or maybe he could applied to the overseas branch of a Korean company—

 

Just as he thought _Stop, don’t give up yet!_ a voice greeted him: “What are you thinking?”

 

Daniel blinked, and found Seongwoo’s reflection on the mirror panels on the practice room. The older male had changed his outfit into a set of fluffy pyjamas. He looked really comfortable, his hair was still a bit wet from the shower. Daniel didn’t answer the question, and Seongwoo didn’t push further.

 

He just took Daniel’s water bottle and gave it to him, “You didn’t come back to our room for hours, so I’m looking for you.”

 

“I’m here… practicing.”

 

“Rest,” The older male’s voice sounded stern, yet worried, “You still need your sleep. You need to restore your stamina.”

 

“Hmm…” Daniel nodded, slowly. He let Seongwoo went to the tape and pressed the off button. Suddenly, the practice room was silent. The English village during the night was quiet—except for the other contestants’s voices carried from afar, there were no other noises. Daniel opened his water bottle and took big gulps of it. He was parched; his throat felt dry and the ion water finally revitalized his body.

 

“Let’s come back to our room,” Seongwoo nudged him, and Daniel winced. “Sorry, I’m so sweaty and smelly at the moment.”

 

Seongwoo wanted to reply that it doesn’t matter—that he was long accustomed with the smell of sweat at their practice room, and Daniel still faintly smelled like coconut, amber and musk. He smelled strangely sweet and sunny, and Seongwoo found that he relaxed due the latter’s smell. A really weird and awkward thing to confessed, so Seongwoo kept his mouth shut and didn’t tell the latter about it.

 

“It’s okay,” Seongwoo smiled as he pushed the glass panelled door open, “Let’s come back.”

 

They walked side by side to the dorm side building. Daniel was wearing his other shirt as his previous one was drenched. He shoved the said shirt into his small bag along with his water bottle and wet towel—he truly need to wash them right after he reached the dorm.

 

Yet at the moment, he didn’t think about such mundane thing as laundry. The night sky was ink black, splattered with thousands of blinking stars. The night air felt cold against Daniel’s hot skin, the breeze dried his sweats as he walked with Seongwoo—the two of them didn’t say anything but he didn’t felt awkward. Instead, the silence felt comforting and peaceful. Daniel was sure that it wasn’t only an imagination from his side; the unknown feelings between them had taken shape and Daniel sure it was more than friendship. In each steps they had taken, Daniel felt his heart bursting with love—it felt so full that his foolish heart couldn’t contained his feelings towards the older male.

 

It was never a meet cute—they met as they were contestants of the same survival show and they didn’t really speak until Daniel entered the A class, but there were something between them that clicked right away. They conversed and they did things together, and all of the sudden everyone, even themselves, found that the two of them are a pair. They were almost stuck together all the time. If you want to find one of them, try to find the other one. You’ll found them, together like a duo.

 

“We are here,” The raven haired smiled as he pivoted towards Daniel, opened his arms to gesture the huge building behind him. 

 

Then, Seongwoo’s voice sounded distorted. 

The sentence repeated again: “We are here. Daniel? Daniel? We are here.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Daniel? We are here, woke up.”

 

_Woke up…?_

 

Then he blinked awake.

 

La Miran was tapping his shoulders, nudging him awake. The minivan had stopped in front of the airbnb compound’s front gate. Yawned, Daniel tried to sobered himself by rubbing his eyes. “Ah, we are here?”

 

Beside him, Seongwoo looked like he was just woken up as well. Daniel recognized the daze expression way too well. “Come on,” He said to the older male, “Let’s go back to our room.” Seongwoo nodded while he was still looking dazed, “Hmm.”

 

They stepped from the minivan and waved towards the other hosts, “See you guys tomorrow.” Then they walked again, side by side, shoulders brushed against each other as they entered the villa and staggering while climbing the stairs towards the second level. Both of them were bleary and extremely sleepy, entered Daniel’s room as Seongwoo just followed Daniel blindly, eyes closed as he leaned his forehead on the latter’s back.

 

Daniel groggily pulled the blanket and climbed onto his bed, didn’t bother to even erase his light make up. He landed on the bed, almost sprawling his limbs out, but gave in to Seongwoo whom nudged him to the side and left half of the king sized bed to the older male.

 

“I’m sleepy,” Seongwoo muttered, not thinking anything, eyes were still half closed. Daniel replied as he let Seongwoo took half of his blanket, mumbled, “Then sleep.”

 

And that’s how they went to sleep: on Daniel’s bed, sharing a blanket together.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I miss my boi so much aaahhhh ;_________;  
> I wished him to be well with clarification about all those bad rumours and a better contract after all of these struggles XDXD


	40. Places in Jeju [3]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In less than three seconds, all of the casts recognized which display they mimicked. 
> 
> “Ah, it’s the Michaelangelo’s Creation of Adam…!”
> 
> They clapped and laughed at the duo’s wits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good Monday morning, my lovelies~!!
> 
> I hope you guys are healthy and well! The weather had been crazy these days and my office had officially clouded with the usual epidemic: everyone is coughing and got a sore throat. I caught it as well. GDI it felt so uncomfortable--my stomach and back muscles suffered from the cough fits as well. Dang, it was one of the moments I thought for myself "GDI I'm old" My muscles were sore from all those coughs XDXD It never happened when I'm young and tender.... /slapped

 

* * *

  

His face felt sticky and greasy as he wake up.

Daniel groaned, scolded himself as he couldn’t even do the most basic thing to take care of his skin: removing the make up. His morning alarm was ringing non stop to the point it sounded really annoying, so he grabbed his phone and pressed the button to mute it. He groaned again, rolled his back to the mattress once more, staring at the unfamiliar ceiling of the airbnb—the white gypsum finish was covered with some golden speckles from the morning sun that escaped through the curtain.

 

Despite being summer, the morning air felt cold against his skin. Daniel was contemplating to rise and actually went to the bathroom or laze for a few more minutes on the bed, when his blanket was pulled away slowly from him.

 

Daniel’s eyes went wide.

 

A tuft of familiar raven hair peeked through the blanket burrito. Daniel could only see the forehead and a bit portion of the eyes, but he recognized the man beside him. Seongwoo mumbled something that sounded like a butchered version of _‘cold’_ and curled his body into a fetal position. Beside him, Daniel shifted himself into a sitting position—starring at the older male with unreadable expression. 

 

Just like him, Seongwoo slept with his make up on. His eyebrows looked relaxed as those thick eyelashes fluttered. It didn’t show up on his face, but at the moment Daniel’s heart was filled with warm and fluffy emotions. He wanted to tackle the older male into a big bear hug and snuggle against him, but he was sober enough to remember the cameras installed on the room.

 

Well, it was a quite good thing that he and Seongwoo slept like a dead log the night before. Usually, they would unconsciously snuggled up together. Last night though, they were too tired to notice anything.

 

“Hyung,” Daniel used the honorifics, his point finger moved and poked the gap between Seongwoo’s eyebrows, “Seongwoo Hyung. Hyung… woke up.”

 

Both of him and Seongwoo was a rather heavy sleeper and difficult to woke up. Jisung was their witness—the ex-leader of WANNA ONE used to be their roommate and did enough attempt to woke them up; usually ended with the rushing on the last minute so they won’t be late. 

 

Seeing that Seongwoo didn’t budge at all, Daniel decided that he would let the older male slept for a while more. He left the bed and went to the vanity, took his cotton pad and the cleanser, slowly cleaned his make up. Daniel winced and laughed as he saw the toffee coloured residue on the used pad and showed it briefly to the camera.

 

“I slept without removing my make up,” He grimanced, “Boys and girls at home, don’t do this okay? You must properly remove your make up. Wearing your make up while you sleep will damage your skin. Take care of your face, use skin care properly.”

 

Daniel opened his suitcase and took the prepared set of the outfit today: a sandy white and soft green Hawaiian shirt, a thin sleeveless inner shirt, and army green short pants. Very discreetly, he took his brief underwear and stuffed it between the folds of his clothes. Then he stood up and looked at Seongwoo on the bed.

 

If you were watching the whole thing from the monitor, the scene was particularly funny. Daniel looked so lost about what he should do. The scene when he wake up and found out that Seongwoo was right beside him was later slow-motioned by the editor, with added funny sound effect and many animation gestures. The current moment of him hesitated back and forth to woke Seongwoo up or not was layered with matrix green numbers effect, accompanied with computer’s calculating noise, giant bold caption added, parodying the Shakespeare’s quote: _to woke up or not to woke up._

 

“Hyung,” Daniel finally nudged Seongwoo again, “Woke up. We need to prepare for today’s shooting.”

 

Right after he finished saying ‘shooting’, Seongwoo’s eyes finally opened. He looked dazed and unfocused, his hair was cowlicked. “Hmmm?” Seongwoo blinked, the gestures were too cute and the dynamic camera zoomed to Seongwoo’s face to capture the movements.

 

Daniel patted Seongwoo, “Seongwoo Hyung? Come on, let’s wash up.”

 

“…where am I?” Seongwoo asked as he rubbed his eyes and yawned. “Oh? I’m not in my room…”

 

“Yeah,” Daniel laughed, “You’re in my room. We were too sleepy yesterday, somehow we slept on my bed until morning.”

 

“Ah,” Seongwoo was witful enough to take Daniel’s bait, acted innocently as he joined the laugh, “Old habit died hard. We were roommates for too long, I become accustomed to follow you to a same room…”

 

Then, noticing the clothes on Daniel’s hand, Seongwoo asked, “You’re about to wash up? I’ll do the same then.” Smoothly, he went back to his own room and took out his clothes, even pretended to sing before he stepped into his own share of room’s inner bathroom.

 

Since they both got their own personal bathroom and didn’t need to take turn in waiting, it didn’t take long for the two of them to get ready. In a comfortable atmosphere, the two of them left the airbnb and took a short walk to the house next door.

 

The summer morning was bright and sunny. Greens filled the view with thick foliages, and the wind carried a whiff of humid scent. The show’s hosts were awake—Seok Cheon in particular way busy at the greenhouse area near the front gate. He had just finished harvested the vegetables he need to cook breakfast. “Oh, you guys came at the right time,” He called, and the two of them hurriedly approached the bald man and helped him to carry the baskets of crops towards the house.

 

“Do you need any help?” Daniel offered, so Seok Cheon asked him, “Can you help cutting the ingredients?”

 

“Sure.”

 

So that was what they ended up doing. The girls were preparing another menu, rows of mandu was being prepared to be cooked. They made 2 versions of it, the one shaped like an ingot and one that shaped with scrimped fanned edge. The ingot ones would be boiled in soup while the scrimped ones would be pan-fried. Miran and Narae were expert in cooking, so they did it extremely fast—but Sook and Hyorin did it in a slower pace.

 

Seok Cheon was making another wrapped dish: the Vietnamese spring roll. They were paying homage to the moment Park Bo Gum made that dish at Hyori’s Bed and Breakfast season 2. Seok Cheon had prepared the other fillings: he had boiled the shrimps and peeled them, the vermicelli had been freshly boiled, he even prepared some meats from last night BBQ’s leftover. 

 

Since the dish was versatile enough to be modified, he took some greens and vegetables from the greenhouse. Daniel and Seongwoo was busy julienned the carrots and the cucumber. The mini tomatoes were ripe as well, so Seok Cheon took a bunch of them and sliced them into halfs.

 

Soon, they ate their breakfast. All of them got a small bowl of the mandu soup, and heaps of the pan fried ones. The spring rolls were easy to make and they rolled the wrap themselves. The rice paper wrap need to be dipped in water, so they got several bowls filled with water on the table.

 

It was Hyorin whom noticed the interactions between Daniel and Seongwoo once again. With a really natural movement, Daniel took the soup bowl and passed it to Seongwoo. Then he stood up to take the spoon and chopsticks from across the table and gave a pair to the older male as well. Daniel proceed to took another pair for Tae Gun and Seok Cheon as well, so Hyorin then dismissed her earlier thought.

 

_Oh, he was helping everyone. He’s such a nice guy—_

 

But then, Daniel took the glasses and passed them to others, but he didn’t do it for Seongwoo. Hyorin was chewing her mandu, so she couldn’t comment about it yet—then she saw it: Daniel took the tea jug and filled a glass, put that glass in front of Seongwoo before he filled his own glass.

 

_Oh?_

 

Hyorin really wondered if it was only her who noticed all of those gentle gestures. Whenever Seongwoo had any difficulties to reach a particular ingredients to put on his spring rolls, Daniel would noticed it quickly and grabbed the ingredients for the raven haired. He refilled Seongwoo’s cups whenever it looked empty. He even made a wrap of rolls with shrimps on it, and Hyorin remembered that Daniel supposed to be allergic to it. She was just opened her mouth to reprimanded the blonde male about it when she saw the latter put the wrap to Seongwoo’s plate.

 

Again, she felt lonely. _Ah, really. I also want to be lovey dovey with my husband as well…!_

 

* * *

 

Their itinerary for the day was visiting [The Teddy Bear Museum](https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/Attraction_Review-g297892-d2202463-Reviews-Teddy_Bear_Museum_Jeju-Seogwipo_Jeju_Island.html) and [The Maze Land](https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/Attraction_Review-g297885-d8610866-Reviews-Maze_Land-Jeju_Jeju_Island.html). Tomorrow would be their last day and it was only lasted for half a day until the evening, so there only one destination for the last day, [The Jeju Miniature Land](https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/Attraction_Review-g297885-d4087348-Reviews-Jeju_Mini_Mini_Land-Jeju_Jeju_Island.html).

 

The Teddy Bear Museum, just like its name, was filled with all sorts of teddy bears plush on displays. They were categorized by themes and periods of time, and some were used as commemorative to remember a certain event. On the outdoor yard, there were life sized statues and figurines in all sorts of fun poses. Of course, all of them were teddy bears as well.

 

“Jeju Teddy Bear Museum opened on April 24th, 2001,” It was Park Narae’s turn to introduce the site, “It contains two galleries, a museum gift shop, and a museum cafe. Also, on site is a museum bar and restaurant. It is a wonderful place to meet friends, family, and lovers! Oh one more thing, from the outside garden, there is a view of Jung-Mun Beach. There, there… can you guys see it?” She pointed somewhere on the distance and all of the cast members found the said beach.

 

“We got assignments to make it more fun,” Park Narae announced as one of the staffs put a plank hidden with a piece of red cloth, “Please show it to us, 3… 2… 1….!”

 

They pulled the cloth off and with a big, bold letters it was written: _Take a picture following a display._ Actually, it was easy—there were many teddy bear displays using famous people. Van Gogh, Steve Jobs, Monalisa, even a teddy bear adorning an LV coat and hat set. The challenge was the other cast members need to guess which display they mimicked without even showing the display they took as inspiration.

 

They got an hour to explore the museum and choose a display to be mimicked. All of them took different routes, though some of them made smaller groups. Kim Sook and La Miran explored together, the same with Daniel and Seongwoo—the two of them shared a camera together. Daniel held the stick and together, they made silly poses, rotated themselves 360 degrees as they asked the viewers if they could see the surrounding displays. They took pictures with the life sized statues; Seongwoo pretended to toast with one of the statue in picnic table. 

 

Time went fast, and soon all of them gathered back to the gathering place. The show’s crews had been informed about their display’s selection. The cast members need to pose in front of the other members, then photographed. Before the photo comparison showed on the huge LCD screen in front of them, other casts need to guessed which display they mimicked.

 

Thanks to her hair, Hyorin could easily mimicked the Monalisa display. In the beginning, they were confused as she posed—but then Seok Cheon noticed how she put a smile that didn’t look like a smile on her face. La Miran mimicked the life sized statue on the picnic table, while Kim Sook mimicked the one on the fishing dock. Tae Gun mimicked a villager teddy bear from the crowded Joseon era, the one holding a pole on his hand. Park Narae was one of the easiest to be guessed: she mimicked _‘The Thinker’_ bear. She did a good job, but the other hosts teased her since she put a constipated expression on her face while doing the pose.

 

Then, it was Daniel’s turn. Sheepishly, he and Seongwoo took steps forward together. “We are doing a collaboration,” He said, and the other hosts realized that it wasn’t forbidden to do a couple pose for the challenge. They weren’t forbidden to form a team as well. “Ah, I didn’t think about it…! You are allowed to form a team, no rules forbid it…!”

 

Daniel borrowed three chairs from the staff. The other cast members were curious about it. Then, he climbed on the chairs and lied sideways. On his left, Seongwoo sat on the ground. In less than three seconds, all of the casts recognized which display they mimicked. 

 

“Ah, it’s the [Michaelangelo’s Creation of Adam](https://media-cdn.tripadvisor.com/media/photo-s/04/0d/5e/fc/teddy-bear-museum-jeju.jpg)…!”

 

They clapped and laughed at the duo’s wits. 

 

* * *

 

They had their next meal at [Angeori Bakgeori](https://www.visitjeju.net/en/detail/view?contentsid=CNTS_000000000022478&menuId=DOM_000001818000000001#p1). 

Their next destination, the Maze Land, was really far away from the Teddy Bear Museum. The said restaurant was located on the route they took to the maze, so the restaurant was picked as their late lunch’s place. 

 

Angeori Bakgeori is located near Seogwipo Lee Jung Seop street. They got great selection of traditional Korean menu. The owner explained that they got steamed rice and soup as their best seller, along with over 15 kinds of side dishes. Those _banchans_ were including _Dombe_ meat, grilled sea bream, _doenjang_ bean paste stew, steamed eggs and all kinds of vegetables. 

 

It was a great meal, and the price was reasonable. Soon they finished their meals and quickly headed to to Maze Land. They were using the same minivan they used the day before, and no changes made for the seats arrangement; Seongwoo and Daniel sat together side by side on the left side. 

 

“…you felt kinda warm,” Daniel commented when Seongwoo’s arm accidentally brushed against his, “Are you okay? Did you get a heat stroke? Or the summer’s fever?”

 

Seongwoo just shook his head, “I’m fine.”

 

Daniel wanted to refute the latter’s reply, but else than being a little warm, Seongwoo still looked fine. He got a nice appetite back there on the restaurant, and he still looked cheerful as ever—the older male didn’t look sluggish at all.

 

“…okay,” Daniel sighed, “But if you felt sick or dizzy, please tell me right away.”

 

* * *

 

 

** BONUS **

** **

[Daniel and Seongwoo's reference pose.](https://media-cdn.tripadvisor.com/media/photo-s/04/0d/5e/fc/teddy-bear-museum-jeju.jpg)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still missing OngNiel like crazy ;________;
> 
> Btw if you guys need to see [this video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9ukEA1U6sk)\--it inspired me for all the lovey dovey scenes at Jeju arc. I'M SOFT. THEY ARE SOOOOOO SWEEETTT AAAHHHH ///////


	41. Places in Jeju [4]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some people said that you shouldn’t fall in love, because anything fall was bound to be crashed.  
> But for Daniel, Seongwoo didn’t mind to fall in love. He knows that Daniel would be there, for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good night my lovelies~!!
> 
> Yeah, it's kinda late when I posted this chapter. But it's still Monday~~ LOLZZ
> 
> Enjoy the chap ^^

* * *

 

They reached the [Maze Land](https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/Attraction_Review-g297885-d8610866-Reviews-Maze_Land-Jeju_Jeju_Island.html) around evening.

There were two mazes on the site, on of them looked like the famous _dol hareubang_ statue. The walls of the maze on the left was made from black basalt stones while the other one was using greenery shrubs. The height of these walls were varied depended on the area you were exploring. They said the maze park itself was designed to remind visitors of the three things that are said to be plentiful on Jeju Island: stones, wind, and women.

 

There was a gift shop on the site, along with a vast green park near the forestry area. The sky was slightly turned into a deeper azure colour, but there were still enough daylight for the time being. The park near the forestry area was decorated with strings of lights, the bulbs were covered with circular ball of yarn, looked particularly rustic and dreamy.

 

Seongwoo didn’t remember much about the introduction of the place as he felt dazed most of the time. While he maintained a serious expression on his face, the dull pain in his head started to evolve into a pounding headache. It was hard to think, or even coordinated his movements. He still recognized the challenge to enter the maze and quickly find the exit, but he felt so sluggish—it was hard to take another steps.

 

“Seongwoo-ya…!”

 

Daniel’s concerned face came to his peripheral vision. 

When his senses were back to him, Seongwoo was crouched on the ground; pale faced with beads of cold sweats formed on his temples. He tried to focus his gaze—and just as he staggered, Daniel’s strong arms supported him. “Are you okay—ah, no… that’s a silly question. Do you feel pain somewhere?”

 

“Di…zzy…” was the only thing Seongwoo managed to reply. He was practically leaned on Daniel’s grip. He felt hot and uncomfortable, and despite Summer the evening’s wind felt chilly on his skin. Daniel’s face filled with worries. Seongwoo wanted to ease him and told the younger male that it was okay, he’s fine—but he couldn’t speak much and his consciousness was floating away.

 

The staffs had stopped the game and the other hosts slowly approached their position. La Miran put her hand on Seongwoo’s forehead, “He’s burning up.” 

 

Their location was far from any hospital in Jeju, but there was a clinic not too far from the site. It was decided that the other hosts would continue the game, though the challenge had been simplified. Daniel was supposed to join the hosts, but he looked absolutely worried and couldn’t stay still, so the staffs allowed him to accompanied Seongwoo to the clinic along with Youngsik Hyung and one of the show’s staff. After all, Seongwoo’s manager wasn’t on location and he needed someone to take care of him for the time being.

 

It was rather chaos and Seongwoo felt sorry as he ruined the show’s schedule—he muttered the faint _sorry_ over and over, the staffs and the hosts accepted it right away. “Don’t worry, hurry and get your treatment…!”

 

They were using a smaller car, the one usually used for the crew instead of the hosts and the guests of the show. Youngsik Hyung was sitting next to the show’s staff, who drove them to the clinic. On the back seat, Seongwoo was lied in fetal position, his head was rested on Daniel’s thigh. The road was clear without any traffic, and Seongwoo’s consciousness drifted away.

 

* * *

 

His surroundings felt surreal.

Seongwoo couldn’t decide if it was dark or bright—it felt like he was just a speck of consciousness drifting through an abstract dimension. He couldn’t hear, or see, or feel anything—the surroundings were his cocoon.

Deep down, he realized all of these wasn’t real.

 

He must be dreaming.

Or at least, unconscious.

 

Seongwoo wondered if he was floating. Or maybe, maybe he was falling. Down, down, down, with a really slow speed that made him unable to realize the process of him sinking down—deeper to the endless abyss.

 

Falling.

 

_I was familiar with falling_ , he thought to himself. He was falling a lot; not in the physical, literal way. He was falling into his own anxiety and depression countless times. He had lost count of how many times he let himself sink into his negative feelings and ruined much of his life. He was struggling, and his mental illness chained him down like a weight on his ankles; like a quicksand that drowned him down and it was futile to resist—he would only sinking faster if he did.

 

He had tried those pills, those medications. They only made him numb inside and sleepy for the majority of his waking times. The medications didn’t help. They didn’t solve his problems, his insecurities. Whenever the pills ran out and he was freed from the effect of those chemicals, his anxiety and depression came back—like a ghost that keep haunting him until the end of time. They were his skeleton in the closet. Seongwoo called them his punishment, of an unknown sin he couldn’t decide.

 

Seongwoo wanted to make peace with his inner demons. He wanted a closure, if it was possible. He want a point of coexistence, a balance to keep himself sane. Yet, those mental states were disagree with him. Sometimes they were docile and quiet, yet some of the other times they come tenfolds and taunted him—it felt like a torture.

 

People often say _love yourself_ , but Seongwoo couldn’t manage to do it properly. It was hard to love himself as it is—since he felt that he was incomplete, imperfect—he was broken and he got major faults.

 

But Daniel loves him anyway.

 

Daniel found him and loves him. Seongwoo marvelled about it.

 

Some people said that you shouldn’t fall in love, because anything _fall_ was bound to be crashed.  But for Daniel, Seongwoo didn’t mind to fall in love. He knows that Daniel would be there, for him. 

 

Because _love_ came along with _thrust_ —you gave your heart to someone else, bare your soul for him, surrendering yourself to the other person.

 

It was hard for him to do so, but Seongwoo did.

 

He gave himself to Daniel.

 

* * *

 

“You are awake.”

 

The unfamiliar ceiling was rather grey than white. The fluorescent lamps felt too bright, yet on the same time felt too dim for the room. Seongwoo didn’t need to smell the familiar scent of disinfectant to realize where he was for the moment. 

 

The mattress was firm and narrow, but the pillow was soft enough. A small thin blanket covered his torso. An IV drip was connected into his arm, and he could felt the fever patch plastered on his forehead. Seongwoo groaned weakly. His whole body felt sore—as if there was someone had punched all over him.

 

“Do you still feel dizzy?”

 

He felt uncomfortable but his head didn’t pounding anymore. Seongwoo blinked for a couple of times as he answered, “No?” He sounded as he didn’t sure about his own condition. Daniel, who sat on the small chair by the bed, sighed. Seongwoo noticed the angry expression, “You are angry.”

 

The statement sounded funny. It was true, and Seongwoo said the sentence not as a question—it was rather said as a confirmation. Daniel pinched the older male’s cheek softly. “I’ve asked you that if you feel unwell, please tell me immediately.”

 

“Sorry.”

 

“They said that you got a heatstroke, along with fatigue.” Daniel said, and Seongwoo remembered his hectic schedule—the ones he completed so he could take his day offs. “Oh,” He said, and Daniel pouted, “Take care of yourself more.” He touched the older male’s temples and neck to check his temperature, “It had gone down. The doctor said we can leave after the IV drip finished.”

 

“Mmm.”

 

“Are you sleepy?”

 

“A bit.”

 

“Sleep then, I’ll wake you up later.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Cheekily, Seongwoo took Daniel’s hand and held it in his sleep. The younger male was taken aback by the bold gesture, but his heart melted and a smile broke on his lips. In helplessness, Daniel just tilted his head and watched Seongwoo’s sleeping face.

 

* * *

 

“You are back…!”

 

It was dinner time when they reached the house. It was another self-sufficient meals like their breakfast. The hosts, per Seok Cheon and Narae’s commands, were preparing the vegetables harvested from the green house. They were sitting at the long dining table, using several knifes and wooden chopping boards. They left their seats to welcome Seongwoo.

 

“I’m back,” Seongwoo politely replied, bowed his back as he apologized, “Sorry for the inconvenience before. I did a mishap and didn’t take care of my health well.”

 

No one blamed him, and he was ordered to sit on the ‘special seat’—denied to do anything else than resting. Daniel was soon given another apron, knife and chopping block—a heaps of tomatoes were placed in front of the blonde haired. “Please dice these tomatoes into smaller pieces.”

 

They were cooking pasta for the night. Instead of the common spaghetti or fettuccini, they were provided with colourful fusilli. The local made pasta was dyed using natural ingredients—butterfly pea, beet, parsley and onion’s skin. It looked oddly appetizing since the unusual colours. They sauteed the pasta in aglio olio style using olive oil and some garlic, along with heaps of summer vegetables such as tomatoes, eggplants, corns and a bit of chopped basil leaves.

 

It was a hearty and fulfiling meal, followed by several rounds of game of [werewolf](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mafia_\(party_game\)). It was funny, but neither of Daniel nor Seongwoo got the exciting parts like the hunter or the werewolf itself. Since there were only eight people of them, they only used the additional doctor role beside the ordinary villagers. They played for a total of five rounds, and both of them always got the villagers role.

 

It was Seongwoo’s last night with them as he would leave back to Seoul the next day. _A night left_ , Daniel thought, and he stole a glance at the older male—he didn’t want to part with the raven haired yet. He didn’t want the night to end.

 

 


	42. As You Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Somehow, the song reminded him to Daniel. 
> 
> I love you as you are, the lyrics stated. 
> 
> And that was one of Daniel’s promise to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies~!!
> 
> First of all, sorry that I'm missing for the last 2 weeks. I think I did tell you guys about one of my best friend getting married right? Well, I'm the one who designed the invitation (along with the illustrations), the sacrament booklet, the souvenir coupon, the thank you tag for the wedding's souvenirs, etc. We also hurriedly planning for the bridal shower. It was so hectic (and I did all of these on my free time between my day job in the office) so I could barely continue the story. But no worries~~!! Yesterday (Sunday, 5th of May) was her wedding. So finally I'll get most of my time slots back :)
> 
> P.S. Her husband is Korean btw. He's from Busan as well LOLZ I asked so many things about Busan for the sake of the story, including the places there so I could do a proper research for this series.
> 
> P.S.2. Her mother in law's skin is so amazingly flawless--it was rosy, healthy, with no wrinkles despite her age. I'm not the only one noticed her great skin--the groom's mother is so graceful and beautiful. It's really the power of Korean's skincare (?) Seriously ah I envy her skin so much >w<

 

* * *

 

The weather was bright and sunny when Seongwoo dragged his suitcase from the baggage claim area, slowly headed to the arrival gate. Per Jihyo Noona’s instruction, he exited using the VIP route. The older female was waiting for him near the more secluded gate, her long hair was twisted into a bun due the hot weather. She grimaced as she saw Seongwoo—drapped in coat, hat and mask, approached her.

 

“How’s the holiday?” She asked, swallowed her inner retort: _aren’t you hot with all those get ups? You’re so bundled up, even I felt hot by just seeing you dressed like that._

 

“Well,” Seongwoo tried to joke, “I got a mild heatstroke, but overall it was fun. I didn’t expect to ended up joining the show.”

 

“And before you leave you said that you got a plan,” Jihyo jabbed, “Turns out you didn’t have one.”

 

“Touche.”

 

The journey back was peaceful and almost quiet, except for the songs played on the car’s radio player. Jihyo played one of Seongwoo’s CD collection on the player, the band was one of his all the time favourite. Seongwoo had recommended the band and the songs on his SNS before, and he knows the lyrics word by word. 

 

The familiar song gave him some sense of belongings, though it felt weird that by a few hours difference, suddenly he and Daniel was separated with kilometres of distance. His short period in Jeju felt exciting and blissful—Daniel was there by his side almost 24/7, just like their olden days.

 

“Are you sleepy?” Jihyoo asked, peeked a glance at him from the rear mirror. Seongwoo had been dozing off for the last few minutes. “A bit,” he replied. The show was great, but he couldn’t truly relax and sleep with all those cameras. The conscious part that constantly reminded him that he was watched and monitored put him quite on edge.

 

“Sleep then,” Jihyo suggested, “There’s still some time until your schedule.” The gig was an SNL comedy skit. Seongwoo would participate during several live skits. He had reviewed and practiced the script—it was brilliantly hilarious as ever. The show would be shoot during the later part of the day, so he got several good hours to rest.

 

“Hmm.”

 

Seongwoo took his neck pillow and wore it absent-mindedly. The pillow was fluffy and comfortable, firm enough to support his neck. Being an idol and actor that spends most of his time in his van, a good neck pillow is a must, one of the essentials.

 

The music felt soothing, almost like a lullaby. Seongwoo loves the particular song played, and he mouthed the lyrics as he slowly closed his eyes.

 

_♪_ ♫ ♬ _Yeah, you waged this war within yourself_

_Wasting time dying in a shell_

_They don't define you, just know they never will_

_I love you as you are_

_I love you as you are ♪_ ♫ ♬

 

Somehow, the song reminded him to Daniel. _I love you as you are_ , the lyrics stated. And that was one of Daniel’s promise to him. More than just a mere sweet whisperings, more than just a pillow talk. The younger male hang on him, held him, anchored him as they were fated to not separate. Parting ways wasn’t an option. Each of them need the latter—completed each other, as two was meant to be one.

 

♪  ♫ ♬ _And when the whole damn world_

_don't know what they got 'til it's gone_

_I love you_

_I love you as you are_

_I love you as you are ♪_ ♫ ♬

 

* * *

 

Their last night at Jeju was ended as a double celebration: Seongwoo’s belated birthday party and his early farewell. After the busy rounds of werewolf game, the lights were suddenly out. The room was dark; and just as Seongwoo tried to grab Daniel’s hand, he found out that the younger male, whom had been idle after unfortunately ‘died’ on the previous werewolf’s voting judgement had left his seat. The other hosts exclaimed about power outage, so he didn’t think much of it—but then from the other side of the room, Daniel emerged.

 

He was holding a medium sized round cake that decorated with white fresh cream and heaps of fruits, the strawberries were particularly huge and glistening like jewels under the decorative candles. Those candles were glowing in warm golden hue, basking Daniel with a soft halo. The younger male was grinned, and as he started “Happy belated birthday to you—“ the rest of the hosts and crews sang along and clapped their hands almost in unison.

 

“Daniel-ssi told us that the 25th is your birthday and we felt it would be fun to throw a celebration party,” Seok Cheon told Seongwoo excitedly, “We chose the cake together, hope you’ll like it…!”

 

Seongwoo’s eyes felt hot. He was touched for the celebration. Daniel’s smile who stood in front of him was wide, almost grinning. “Make a wish and blow the candles,” He said, so Seongwoo did. He closed his eyes, wished for a happy future with Daniel with all of his heart and soul, then blew the candles—they turned out to be those gag candles that would always be re-lit no matter what. Seongwoo blew and blew, before he frustratedly yelled, “Yaaah…!” and lightly jabbed Daniel’s arm since the younger male laughed endlessly like a hyena.

 

Seongwoo really want to poke the fresh cream on the cake and smeared it on Daniel’s face as his revenge, but he held himself back. He was the older one, though it was only by a year, but someone need to be the more mature one in the relationship. So he patiently ask for a knife and cut the cake into many small portions so everyone could eat a bite of the birthday cake.

 

Still, when he passed the cake slices around, Seongwoo acted indifferently as he gave the first slice to Daniel—using the pretence that the blonde male was standing right next to him, before quickly distributed the other slices. Daniel noticed the gesture and ate his share with several big bites, a smile never left his face. Seongwoo ate his portion as well, but mischievously left some creams behind.

 

“Niel?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

Then with a swift movement, Seongwoo smeared a trail of cream on Daniel’s cheek before he roared in laugh and immediatelly ran away from the Busan man. “It’s a payback for the candle…!” Seongwoo said between his laughs.

 

Daniel made a wronged and pitiful expression, “But I’m not the one who picked the candles—“

 

“But you laughed the most…!”

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo felt dizzy.

It wasn’t a headache, but his head felt heavy—yet empty. It was hard to focus, moreover to think. He stood there in a daze, felt himself swayed in a limbo. His surroundings felt hectic and buzzing. _What_ , he thought to himself, _What happened? I need to collect myself up…_

 

“Seongwoo.”

 

He didn’t know who called him, but the latter felt familiar yet foreign at the same time. Seongwoo stared at the latter’s features, tried to remember about the person who just tapped his shoulder, but the man’s face blurred into obscurity and the voice sounded muted, distorted.

 

“Where am I…?” He asked, and slowly everything that surrounded him morphed into a steadier scenery. 

 

“Are you still daydreaming?” The person next to him said, “We’re at Fantagio.”

 

“Oh.”

 

The person was right. He was indeed standing in the middle of Fantagio’s hallway. There were many familiar faces of his colleagues. Yet, Seongwoo felt that he was out of place—something was off and he didn’t know what’s wrong. The other person who passed the hall asked him, “Seongwoo-ssi, why are you dawdling around? You are supposed to go to Mnet now, right?”

 

“Eh?”

 

Mnet? For what purpose? He didn’t remember to have any job that take place at Mnet at the moment. Noticing Seongwoo’s confused expression, the other person furrowed her brows and sighed, “What? Did you forget? You are joining that second season of the show right?”

 

“Which… show?”

 

“Produce 101.”

 

Wait. 

Something is wrong. He did the show already. He had participated on the show, it was ended years ago—even Mnet had produced more shows, including the Produce 48 and the Produce X 101. So why did they say that he was supposed to participating on the second season…?

 

“The second season… had ended two years ago… right?”

 

The Fantagio’s staff raised her eyebrows, “Seongwoo, are you alright?” Her tone of voice sounded as if she was worried about him. “You applied to the show and got notified last month, you remember?”

 

“Eh?”

 

It was bizarre, but he followed suit. His agency helped him with the transportation, using the company car to sent him there. The road to Paju felt awfully familiar. Seongwoo remembered the road—the first time he went to the show, he was so nervous he stared at the road and tried to memorize any unique looking buildings and landmarks to pass the time. He was still on the edge when he entered the audition, but he acted cocky and confident. 

 

He acted in corespondent to his previous behaviour in the past, still thinking how funny the whole thing was. Everything happened as it was on cue, repeating the past. Instead of thinking the weird feeling in his gut as a deja vu, it felt more like he was thrown into a groundhog day—repeating the same past.

 

Then, the screen changed again and showed the MMO logo. Immediately, Seongwoo darted his eyes to the entrance of the set. His heart started to pound. Will Daniel along with the MMO squad enter the room at the next moment? He remembered on the previous meeting, Daniel stole his attention. The youngster dyed his hair pink, wearing one side sleeveless outfit—his muscles were not defined yet but anyone could see his great physique. The latter was tall, looked swag and rough on the first glance, especially with Busan accent; yet on the second look, his eyesmiles was enchanting and his hidden kindness made anyone near him felt relaxed and comfortable.

 

Seongwoo held his breath as the denim cladded squad entered the premise, cheerful and loud, joking within themselves as they came to sight and pointed to the numbered seats. All of the sudden, everything felt as if he was trapped in a slow motion. Seongwoo’s breath halted and he felt a jolt of pang in his heart.

 

There was no youngster with pink cotton hair. 

 

Instead of five people, there were four of them. Seongwoo noticed Jisung right away—along with Kim Jae Han, Joo Jin Woo, and Choi Tae Woong. 

 

But there was no Daniel.

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo still managed to do his performance well, though he didn’t remember much. But he still got the A class like he did before. The boys were instructed to go to their respective dorm, and Seongwoo immediately rushed to find Jisung.

 

“Jisung…!” He called, almost desparate, “Jisung Hyung…!”

 

The older male seemed confused as an unfamiliar trainee from another agency suddenly called out to him with such familiar manner. “…yes?” He asked, blinked as he tried not to furrowed his brow, “Seongwoo-ssi from Fantagio… right?”

 

Jisung’s cautious manner jabbed Seongwoo’s heart with a sharp pang, but he collected his courage and asked the older male politely. “Where’s Daniel?”

 

“I’m sorry—?”

 

“I mean… Kang Daniel…?” Seongwoo felt his anxiety rising up in each seconds passing by, “He’s from MMO as well, right? He was one of your squad—Kang Daniel? Kang Euigeon…?”

 

The dark haired Jisung stared at him as if he wanted to made a carving on Seongwoo’s head, just to sneak a peek to the insides of his head. “…I don’t understand. Really. I’m really sorry but—“

 

A buzz ringing on Seongwoo’s ears, loud—almost mocking him. As his heart speed up and drummed painfully against his ribcages, the familiar sunken feeling emerged from Seongwoo’s guts.

 

_No._

 

_Where’s Daniel…?_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inserted song is Daughtry's As You Are :)
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)
> 
> # I believe this event was still going on:[W1 Author Appreciation](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1060253249121538048)  
> I linked my love letters thread there. If you haven't heard about them, please check them out.  
> You could leave some 'love-letters' to your favourites authors (not only me, there's a lot of amazing authors--my faves authors as well WOOOOHOOOOOYEAAH~~) so please do check the event~!  
> If the author didn't withdrawn from the fanservice, you could get fanservices like Q&A, origins of story, face reveal etc.  
> More details [here.](https://twitter.com/W1Appreciation/status/1052082922906365952)


	43. I Miss You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But there is no Daniel.
> 
> It was bizarre, as if the youth was never there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there my lovelies~!!
> 
> Happy Monday to all of you, and here's the newest chap of our series ^^  
> My mood is GREAT lately as uri Kang Daniel won the case! (Yea, tho LM asked for another re-trial?) But at least the case got an improvement already. OMG I really hope for the best for him. I wondered if he would join any other agency soon (my group chat guessed PSY'S PNation) and I stated that as long as the agency appreciated and nurtured him, any agency that genuine is fine.
> 
> ...but dang it, should I edited this series if he really change his agency? /aaaaaaaaaaaa >w<

* * *

 

 

It was weird, being in the show without Daniel.

Seongwoo often found himself looking back to certain spot or merely drowned in his own thinking before he called Daniel’s name unconsciously before realizing his mistake. By logic, he knew everyone and everything that had happened, including the Nayana choreography, but he found himself hitting the wall over and over again—his body didn’t cooperate as of he never learned the dance and it was truly the first time he tried the steps; eventhough after all these years it supposeed to be embedded into his body’s memories, like a pavlov’s reaction.

 

This time, it was harder to assimilate himself to the A class. He still didn’t do well with the choreography and spent hours to barely passed in mastering the dance. After the re-adjustment, he was actually dumbfounded to realize that not as many people entered the A class from B class this time around.

 

Lil Woojin, who supposedly being close with Daniel and dubbed as ‘Daniel’s kid’ and ‘OngNiel’s baby’ still made it to the class though. Seongwoo overheard from his conversation with Daehwi and Big Woojin that not much from the B class that remember the whole dance steps initially and their instructor yelled at them so much as they barely memorize the choreography. 

 

Nevertheless, Daehwi still ended up being the first center. 

 

Seongwoo didn’t feel jealous or such. He knew how hard-working Daehwi is and the boy deserved it. But being in the corner, looking at his former WANNA ONE member in the same class made him felt a sharp pang everytime they acted distant and adressed him in such unfamiliar manner. Else than Daehwi and Woojin from Brand New Music, there was also Sungwoon—the rest of his member wasn’t in A class—and he used to be so close with the latter that Sungwoon often listened to him and consoled him whenever his anxiety lapsed.

 

He still remember how Sungwoon helped him along with Minhyun during his lowest point when he fought with Daniel. Seongwoo remember about those long hours about them talking about life, about WANNA ONE, about the future, and about Daniel.

 

But there is no Daniel.

It was bizarre, as if the youth was never there. 

 

The first thing he did when they finally allowed to get their cellphone back was checking Daniel’s original Instagram account. It was the first thing that came into his mind. He was particularly remembered the user handle as the very same account made the younger male in so much trouble during their concept song selection—as Daniel was one of several trainees punished for ‘manipulating the vote’ from their national producers.

 

He typed the handle on the search column and—

“There he is…” Seongwoo whispered to himself. Daniel was there in this current world, eventhough he didn’t join the show along with the rest of the MMO squad. The younger male still using the name of Kang Daniel, but the description on his bio mentioned his older nickname: FLAC.

 

Apparently, the current Daniel in this timeline didn’t joined B2M or MMO. He was an underground rapper and dancer, often busking in Hongdae. His Instagram account was filled with gazillion of Peter and Rooney’s pictures, along with his rapping and dancing videos, with occasionally his own selfie. Daniel looked young and bright on those posts—his hair was still in brunette as he didn’t dye his hair with pink this time around.

 

_I miss you_.

 

Seongwoo wanted to contact Daniel somehow, but he didn’t know what to do. He was afraid to make a mistake and Daniel ended up being repulsed by him. _Will it be weird if a stranger suddenly slide to your DM and that stranger was participating in a survival show at the moment?_ His inner conflict seemed petty and minuscule on a glance, but his old frenemies—his anxiety—was eating him up from the insides.

 

These nights he often hides himself on a secluded place, felt so alone and lonely. He felt so out of place in the competition without Daniel in his side. These nights he realized how much he relied on Daniel for mental support during the show. This timeline felt suffocating—cut-throat and unforgiving. 

 

He made it to the first evaluation, still on his former 8th position. The only difference was that he didn’t have any real close friend with him during the whole period. Sure he still tried his best to joke around and the other trainees recalled him as the funny one, the jester—but none of the, were close enough with him. It didn’t feel right to let someone take Daniel’s position. 

 

Seongwoo waited for the chance of the mission—the one that ordered them to pose and take a picture in front of their ads that placed in the train stations. He was utilizing his foldable selfie stick to quickly snapped a photo to complete the task, then with loud beating hearts, he went to Hongdae.

 

It was still noon, barely in the evening. The area was crowded, so he disguised himself with a beanie and a black face mask. He had memorized the route to Daniel’s usual spot—hoping that he could have a glimpse of the latter that day. He was missing the younger male like crazy; to the point that he was wet dreaming about one of their making love session on the former timeline.

 

In his dream, Seongwoo recalled one of those nights Daniel joined him on the sheets. The younger male’s body was toned and Seongwoo desperately clung on his broad shoulders; tried his best to not leaving Daniel’s back with his claw marks. Their bodies was wet and slick from the perspiration; Daniel’s breaths felt hot against his bare skin and the smell of musk filled the room as they joined their bodies so intimately.

 

Daniel’s gaze was gentle and glittering with love, even under the dim light from the small table lamp by the bed. Slowly, their lips met and kneaded each other—caressing and parting and hungry and yearnful. Soft moans would involuntary escaped from Seongwoo’s mouth as his breath rasped—their eyes locked with each other’s as Daniel moved his hips gently, plunged himself deep and slow, almost torturous. Seongwoo could saw his own reflection on Daniel’s dark onyx orbs, hazy-eyed with flushed cheeks and wanton expression. 

 

Their bodies moved in harmony, almost felt like soft-dancing, Seongwoo was buried inside Daniel’s embrace. The younger male felt so stiff and hot, grazed Seongwoo’s inner muscles and building his tempo to pound that one sensitive spot inside Seongwoo that makes him yowled and groaned lewdly, burning in desire.

 

Seongwoo was breathless from all the overstimulation—weakly letting Daniel brushed his wet bangs aside and left a sweet kiss on his damp forehead. He could smell the sweat scent from the latter, mixed with bergamot and sandalwood, so dizzyingly familiar.

 

_Seongwoo-ya_ , _Seongwoo-ya…_

 

Daniel whispered his name, repeated his low husky tone directly by Seongwoo’s ears. Those luscious lips trailed from his temples down to his cheeks, to his jawline, down to his neck—leaving many blooming crimson marks everywhere. Seongwoo let shallow and hurried grunts as he felt the latter’s fingers found his hardened twin nubs. His whole body jerked into a bow as Daniel pinched and kneaded those perked nubs before lapping his tongue on Seongwoo’s left nipple, teasingly grazed it with his teeth before vehemently do the suction action.

 

Seongwoo felt his core shook as the pleasure was too much—it was blinding him and drowned him to the point it felt so scary; he was afraid as his body reacted beyond his control and the whole experience made he felt as if he was losing himself.

 

But Daniel was there with him, felt so vivid and warm—calling his name in every thrust. _Seongwoo-ya. Seongwoo-ya._ It sounded almost like a mantra, and Seongwoo surrendered himself.

 

When he opened his eyes, Seongwoo found himself on the Produce 101’s bunk bed, alone and sweating all over—his pants felt wet and gross from his own release. He dashed to the shower immediately, cleaned himself—yet the sensation was so strong and stimulating he carved for Daniel so badly.

 

He reached down and started to stroke himself, his awakened member turned rigid as he imagined Daniel’s touches on his body. He stroked and stroked, but he still couldn’t find his peak. He couldn’t get his release. Biting his own lips, using his trembling hand, Seongwoo’s chest heaved as he traced his own opening, half-squating under the cold shower. His ring of muscles shivered as he touched the part, welcoming his fingers and greedily sucked them in. 

 

_Daniel…_

 

Seongwoo gritted his teeth and tried his best to held back his moans. His fingers were working his opening up, jabbed the sweet spot in rushed tempo. He ended up kneeling on the surface, with his rear raised upwards—continuously prodded himself inside. Soon, his body shook and Seongwoo’s whole self fell onto the floor, the water from the shower still washed over him as he curled himself into fetal position—lying there motionlessly, cold as those freezing water washed away his comings into the drained, knowing that his heart couldn’t help to feel so empty and hollow.

 

He needs Daniel.

 

So here he is, lost in Hongdae, didn’t have a real plan yet hopeful that he could meet Daniel somehow. He had braced himself and in a burst of sudden courage, left a comment on Daniel’s video. _Nice moves!_ It was simple and unsuspecting enough. He wanted to leave another comment, but he felt like such a creep—so he inhaled and exhaled for a hundred times before he sent a DM to the latter’s inbox.

 

_Hi!_ He typed, _I happened to stumbled upon your account._ He wanted to say that he wasn’t a stranger guy or a creeper or worse, a stalker—but it would came out weird so he typed another message instead: _I found that your dance and rap are really good! You are so skilled._

 

Then, with trembling hands and more anxiety gripped him hard, he finally sent his final messages: _I’ll be free this weekend. I wonder if you would busking again in Hongdae. Wanna meet up and hang out?_

 

He felt like his approach was rather rushed, but he was desperate. It was great that Daniel was here in Seoul and not in Busan—his timeframe won’t let him visit another city, especially that he worried that Daniel would find it even weirder that Seongwoo would take such a long distance just to say hi and meet with him.

 

But Daniel is a good guy with a soft and gentle heart—the younger male replied his DMs as soon as he was online. _Thanks!_ The message was followed by a cute hurray emoji, _You praised me too much, but I’m happy that you like my dance and my rap. My group didn’t plan any schedule for another busking this weekend, but I’m free._

 

Seongwoo’s eyes widened and broke out into a huge smile as he read, _We can do a meet up :) Wanna hang out in one of my favourite place?_

 

Seongwoo saw the shop’s sign and rechecked the information Daniel gave him from their chats. It was a small, cozy cafe, tucked away in an alley. It looked rather rustic yet homey—with ivy vines covered the corner of the red bricks building. The scent of coffee mixed with something sweet and sugary drifted from the inside, along with a muffled noise though he couldn’t see the interior as those huge French windows were tinted dark.

 

“Here it is,” Seongwoo told himself and reached for the door handle, ready to push inside as the small signage instructed so. But before his hand touched the wood handle, the door swung open towards the inside, followed with a sharp jingle of chime—the brass bell would ring whenever the door was opened. 

 

Everything felt like a slow motion: Seongwoo blinked and raised his gaze, the opened door revealed a really nice ambiance inside, the boy who pulled the door was covering his head with a red hoodie but a tuft of brunette peeked through, then their eyes met and Seongwoo recognized the latter’s smiling face.

 

“I noticed you from the inside,” The husky tone was heavy with Busan accent, “Ong Seongwoo, right?”

 

All of the sudden, there was Daniel: right there in front of him. The other boy was real and Seongwoo wasn’t crazy. He didn’t imagine the rapper—Daniel exists. He was here, with Seongwoo, the eyesmiles plastered on his face was too familiar and Seongwoo felt like crying.

 

And he did.

 

His tears fell and on that exact second, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to stop crying easily.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend told me about this particular [webtoon](https://mangatensei.com/series/70718) about idol and I really enjoyed it. If you have time, please check the series as well ^^  
> Reading this series really gives me a strong vibe of nostalgia. Personally, I referred Super Junior as the base for the boyband SHAX coz they got a lot of boys and changed their lineup several times. 
> 
> There was also many K-Pop famous incidents like the black ocean harsh treatment during the "Hope Concert" (SNSD's Dream Concert, anyone?) along with so much deja vu cases like the agency forced the trainees and idols in prostitute business to the investors and conglomerate, etc. Ria from Tea Party and Hyun from SHAX reminded me to Hwasa and LOCO's interaction when they do the collab for Don't (for Hyena on the Keyboard show) 
> 
> P.S. And Hyuk reminded me to Heecul, A LOT. LOLZ.
> 
>  
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)


	44. You'll Always be My Pick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I didn’t want to hear “Seongwoo Hyung” from your mouth again.   
> Not after our last fight. It reminds me to those awful, painful moments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and good Monday, my lovelies~!!  
> Aahahahaha I see dat some of you guys got confused with the current chaps, bear with me for a while more and you'll understand in the future chaps :3
> 
> P.S. Anyone watch the new season of Produce X 101?

 

* * *

 

“I’m so sorry.”

Their icy cold _caffè lattè_ made a soft _clunk_ noise as the ice cubes moved against each other after the cubes located on the bottom of the glass was slightly melted—diluting the pale brown coloured, fresh milk topped the cold brew coffee. 

 

The two of them were sitting on the corner table at the cafe. The irregular shape of the cafe tucked their table away from most of public gaze. Only the ones who sit at the single seated stools on the bar rows attached next to the front windows could see them if they were sitting backwards towards the inside of the cafe.

 

Seongwoo dabbed the tears from his eyes using Daniel’s handkerchief. “It’s just,” Seongwoo tried his best acting as he blinked his eyes repeatedly, “It’s so sudden and it hurts—“ He had blamed his innocent contact lenses, and Daniel made an understanding face in respond. He believed Seongwoo’s lies, just like that. 

 

But sure, someone crying because his contact lenses suddenly slipped was more believable than someone crying because you are supposed to be his said lover and didn’t seemed to be exist until a while before in this timeline, because he used to live on another timelines when the two of you are together.

 

Seongwoo dried his eyes and embarrassedly held Daniel’s handkerchief. “Let me wash this before I give back it to you…?” His tone was unsure, but he wanted something—a memento, an excuse. Having the item means they made another promise for another meet up. Seongwoo wanted them so bad—the future meet ups. 

 

“Sure,” Those eyes crinkled and formed a thin crescent shapes, “No problem.”

 

_Gosh._

_I miss your smile so much._

 

After he tucked the handkerchief away, Seongwoo took a sip of his _caffè lattè._ It was a little bit diluted from all the melting ice cubes, but it was still sweet. He took a long sips, and found that Daniel was watching him.

 

Crimson hue dusted on his cheeks and the tips of his ears—Seongwoo felt his face burning hot as he squeaked, “Did I do something—“

 

“Oh no, no—“ The younger male made a panicked waving gesture, “It’s just… I dunno. It felt surreal. I mean, I’m sitting here with you, drinking some _caffè lattè_ and you are… real. You are supposed to be someone beyond my reach, someone on the television.”

 

It was an irony, wasn’t it? Seongwoo felt just the same: it was surreal. Daniel was real and he did exist on this timeline. He was sitting here with Daniel, and Seongwoo was afraid that it would ended up be an illusion, a fatamorgana.

 

“Why didn’t you join the show…?”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“I mean,” Seongwoo’s brain whirred, busy looking for any excuse, “Individual trainee could join the show as well. There were quite many of them. You are a great rapper, a great dancer. Why didn’t you join the show back then?”

 

“Well,” Daniel awkwardly laughed, “The truth was I used to be B2M’s trainee. But you see, I felt like I won’t have any future with the company. They didn’t provide us with proper lesson, we even didn’t have a proper place to practice. Suddenly the company went in turmoil because of some management separation… and to be honest, my family wasn’t wealthy.”

 

Daniel stirred his coffee using his straw, “My mother is a single mother and she raises me all of her own. I couldn’t be so selfish. I will going to Canada soon, to stay with my aunt’s family. They had arranged me to enter an university there. It would be only a short while until my time here in Seoul up—I was supposed to learn basic English on the academy, until my departure.”

 

“Wait,” Seongwoo’s reply was rather rushed, “You are leaving?”

 

_No._

_Don’t._

_I just met you—_

 

“Yeah.” 

 

“…when?” Seongwoo felt his throat dried up and his voice went hoarse, but he didn’t care about how his tone cracked up. He wondered if his complexion went pale as well.

 

“The end of May,” Daniel answered, “But don’t worry—I’ll keep voting for you even when I’m abroad. The truth is,” He laughed, “I’m kinda your fanboy, actually. You are my pick.”

 

Seongwoo didn’t know how to react—deep down he knew that he should act flattered and thanked the younger male, but Daniel was leaving and his brain couldn’t processed it yet. And then, there was Daniel’s confession about Seongwoo being his pick.

 

He remembered on his original timeline, back then the younger whispered to him, _“You are my pick, Seongwoo-hyung.”_ Back then, Daniel haven’t called him with his usual _Seongwoo-ya_ yet. Seongwoo rolled his eyes, _“Shut up. Don’t sugar coating your lie. You picked Jisung Hyung, remember?”_

 

_“But Hyung, Jisung-Hyung is my unoffical eomma,”_ Daniel pleaded, _“I need to be filial. But seriously though, in my heart you are number one. You are my pick… you’ll always be my pick.”_

_You are my pick._

_You’ll always be my pick._

 

“Ah sorry—“ He was tearing up again. Daniel quickly took some tissue from the tissue box and handed them to him, “Are your eyes okay? Do you need some eye drops? There is a drug store nearby if you don’t have any of the drops.”

 

“It’s okay, I’m fine.” Seongwoo tried to smile, through his tears. Inside, his inner self screamed: _No, I’m not okay. I need you. I want you to stay by my side—_ but it was impossible for him to say it directly to Daniel. Not to this timeline’s Daniel. They are practically strangers, sure Daniel said that he is Seongwoo’s fanboy; but won’t he backed out and be grossed if Seongwoo told him about them being lovers on another parallel timeline? He would probably think that Seongwoo was crazy or insane—Either one wasn’t matter, both means Seongwoo was sick in the head. Or got serious mental issue as he was being delusional.

 

When they parted ways, Daniel gave him a hug and patted his shoulder. “I enjoyed today’s meet up.” He said, and Seongwoo forced himself to smile, “Me too.”

 

Then after a pause, “Can we take some pics?” “Let’s chat for future meet ups?” They asked almost on the same time. Both of them laughed after. “Sure,” Seongwoo posed next to Daniel and let the younger took some selfies, “And I still need to wash your handkerchief.”

 

“Oh, you can have it,” Daniel beamed at him, “It’s no biggie.”

 

“Ah—“

 

“But DM me whenever you got time, I also wish for another meet ups. It’s fun spending time with you, Hyung.”

 

“Sure,” Seongwoo felt his heart tinged, “And… just call me by my name. No need for such formality as hyung.”

 

“But—“

 

“I insist. It’s okay.”

 

_I didn’t want to hear “Seongwoo Hyung” from your mouth again._

_Not after our last fight. It reminds me to those awful, painful moments._

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo didn’t know how, but the show keep going eventhough he didn’t have much recollection of them. He was still picked into the Justice League group by Minhyun, but instead of Daniel he picked his other bandmate, Kang Dongho. Minki came once to their practice room, jokingly complained that Emperor Hwang had lost his interest on him thus he didn’t flip his name plate* and banished him to the cold palace.

 

It felt weird, how things still went on even without Daniel—his rankings did well and quite stable, everyone said that Seongwoo would debut as the top 11 for sure. He laughed and said his thanks, but there was that unfamiliar feelings inside his soul that keep telling him that it wasn’t right; Daniel wasn’t there with him and yet things keep moving on even without the younger boy by his side.

 

They still DMed each other whenever they got time, almost daily. Sneaking some times to avoid the camera and chatted with Daniel during the night after light out became his new habit. It was Seongwoo’s guilty pleasure: he took solace by communicating with Daniel. It assured him, made him feel not so alone—Daniel was there, though he didn’t join the show.

 

It was right after the fancam version of Sorry Sorry suddenly went viral; the first DM he noticed that morning was the one Daniel apologized to him.

 

**@realdefdanik**

_Seongwoo-ya_

_So sorry!_

 

**@osw.onge**

_?_

_Niel?_

_Why’d u apologizing?_

_Did sth happen?_

 

**@realdefdanik**

_Remember our selfie back then?_

_I uploaded it yesterday_

_[IG post]_

_IDK why but it went viral and—_

_somehow everyone start to call us #OngNiel_

 

“Ah—”

 

On the said post, Daniel uploaded the picture of the two of them, smiling brightly to the camera, practically side by side. The two of them looked nice and friendly, Daniel circled one of his arms around Seongwoo.

 

_“_ **_@osw.onge_ ** _Hyung, you’ll always be my pick~! Vote for #OngSeongwoo at #Produce101s2 [NO1] [gold medal] #4DVisual [thumbsup] [thumbsup] [thumbsup]”_

 

Seeing the two of them in the same frame like this reminded Seongwoo to the countless selfie they couldn’t even post in the past. Some of them were printed by Eomma, but the majority of them never seen by the public.

 

_So it was possible to be shipped together with you on this timeline as well…?_

__  
  
Seongwoo touched the screen with a smile, and made a double tap.

 

 

—

*The olden Chinese era Emperor would flip the the consort’s name as a sign of favour, to signal that he would spend the night with the picked consort/concubine. Any consort or concubine (and sometimes empress) that lost the Emperor’s favour was often banished into the cold palace.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw be careful and stay healthy~!  
> It's the flu season at the moment--GDI this last month basically I got a mild cold, then I start coughing as well. It went full blown from the one with phlegm and ended up being the dry one without the phlegm. Then right after I just got better, my lil sis went home with a sore throat and everyone in my office got these cough fit... here goes round 2--all of the sudden I got another stuffy nose along with another series of the cough with phlegms. Damn it. /ORZ
> 
> ======  
> # I made a spotify playlist for all the songs I put on this series~! Click [[Here]](https://open.spotify.com/user/yulita_kurniawanto/playlist/4w8ZKPUeH6s9qB8tkhDJ7U?si=kSN2DJl3Sa-t_71q5rem1g)

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to, you can find me at twitter (mizuno_hikaru) or Instagram (mizunohikaru)--feel free to drop by and say hi! :)


End file.
